Disclaimer: Young Americans does not belong to me, and I am not making any money out of this. It's for my own fun (and hopefully yours, too). Jake and Ham aren't mine either: I just borrow them to play with (and maybe torture a bit, in Ham's case).
Summary: The second Young Americans episode "Our Town", written from Jake and Hamilton's point of view with a little personal tweaks. Enjoy!
A/N: This is my first time writing YA fanfiction, and as such, I'm rather nervous. So please read and review! It would mean a lot to me.
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Jake woke up, squinting at the over bright sunlight that poured from the open window. She got up, passing her fingers distractedly through her hair, and looked around her room.
Rawley Academy, boys' school. She still couldn't believe she managed to pull this off. So far, Bella was the only one who saw through her, although the others probably thought she was a very odd guy. Well, as long as they thought she was a guy…
She sat at her desk, taking out stationary paper and a pen, and began writing a letter to her mother: 'Hey mom, just a note to say I'm here.' She probably doesn't even know where "here" is. 'I'm okay, I miss you and guess what, I just might be fitting in. So, I guess that's all. I'll see you when I see ya. Love, Jacqueline.
She looked around for an envelope, and finding one, put the letter inside and sealed it. On the envelope was written 'Rawley Academy for Boys'. She gave a sarcastic smile "huh, this should tell me if she even reads my letters".
She dressed quickly, pulling two shirts over her corset, and just as she opened the door, she caught sight of herself in the mirror. She half turned, looking at herself in profile. She was so completely flat-chested that it was (while fortunate for the current situation) almost embarrassing. She pressed her palms to her chest experimentally. Nope, don't feel anything underneath, too.
A loud cough from the doorway startled her, and she spun around, blushing. Hamilton was standing at the door way, looking at her strangely. No wonder, she thought, he had just caught me fondling my non-existent chest. Stupid, stupid to leave the door open!
"How long have you been standing there?" she snapped.
He raised an eyebrow "long enough to know…" her heart jumped to her throat until he continued "that I have to make something very clear, cause the other day, when you kissed me," he looked around in alarm, before coming in and closing the door after him "I could have decked you, but I didn't. But if you ever try that again, I will. Because that's not who I think I am, I mean know I am, I mean I know I'm not who you think I am. I'm not. Get it?"
He finished, obviously flustered. She would have found that cute, if she wasn't so busy feeling mortified herself. This was so not a conversation she wanted to have. Not with anyone, and certainly not with Hamilton.
"Excuse me?" she said.
Hamilton seemed uncomfortable "look, if you're gay, that's whatever, that's fine but it's not my bag."
Oh, shit. She thought they were over that, but she was obviously wrong. Men were such homophobes sometimes, especially when it concerned their own sexual orientation. "Okay," she answered, calmly "you said that the other day".
Hamilton wouldn't look at her "yeah well, I just wanted to make it crystal clear."
By threatening to deck me? Why is it that men always resort to proving their masculinity by violence? "Okay..." she said slowly "so...I'm going to go and get my bike. So..." she felt like she needed a little fresh air after this conversation, and she hadn't been over to see Bella yet and tell her how things worked out. Beside, Scout seemed kind of pining lately. She wondered what that was about.
"See ya…" Hamilton said, and left the room.
"See ya…" she answered, letting out a sigh, and grabbed her keys, following him and locking the door on her way out.
------
Hamilton slept poorly. He straightened out things with Jake – they established that Hamilton wasn't gay, he wasn't interested, and they weren't going to talk about this subject anymore. So why was he dwelling on it so much?
The problem, even if he didn't want to admit it to himself, was that Hamilton was starting to doubt the truth of his statement. Ever since that kiss, all he could think about was kissing Jake again. When he was in his room yesterday, all he could think about was how soft Jake's skin looked, and how inviting his lips seemed –
Hamilton screamed into his pillow in frustration. This was so not helping!
He quickly thought of Angelina Jolie. Yep, still as attractive as ever. Hillary Swank? Check. Natalie Portman? Check. Okay, so he was still attracted to girls. He quickly thought about Jake. Double, triple check. Suddenly, all his favourite movie stars seemed pale in comparison.
He fought the urge to bang his head on the wall. He swallowed, and, almost against his will, thought about kissing Scout. He almost threw up on the spot. Will? Even more gross.
Right, that was a bit of relief. So it was just Jake.
It was probably because Jake kissed him that he was experiencing all this confusion in the first place. And the other boy was a bit girly. It was probably just his adolescent raging hormones confounded. As soon as he'll start dating a girl, this confusion would certainly go away. So, he thought to himself, time to get a girlfriend.
And maybe, he should go talk to Jake tomorrow and clarify things, just in case.
When it was morning he got up, groggy, and dressed quickly. He grabbed a quick, light breakfast – eggs and bacon, a few pieces of buttered toast, and two bowls of cereal – and headed out. Hopefully Jake was awake already.
Jake's door was slightly open when he reached it, so he peeked inside. Jake was standing in front of his mirror, patting his chest. It was very strange. What exactly was he doing? Checking if he grew breasts overnight? He coughed loudly, as the other boy didn't seem to notice him.
Jake spun around so quick Hamilton was surprised he didn't fall over. "How long have you been standing there?" he demanded, blushing.
It was not attractive at all.
"Long enough to know…" he started "that I have to make something very clear, cause the other day, when you kissed me," he stopped, looking around him at the corridor in panic. Fortunately it was empty, but he was an idiot, saying it out in the open where anyone could hear. He entered the room quickly, closing the door after him. Of course, now he was alone in a closed space with Jake, which posed another problem altogether.
"I could have decked you," he continued, more quietly "but I didn't. But if you ever try that again, I will. Because that's not who I think I am," shit, that's not what I meant! "I mean know I am, I mean I know I'm not who you think I am. I'm not. Get it?" hopefully, he made sense.
Jake, though, looked confused and a little annoyed "excuse me?" he said.
"Look," Hamilton said "if you're gay, that's whatever, that's fine but it's not my bag." Hopefully. No! Clearly.
Jake looked at him calmly, but Hamilton was too afraid to meet his eyes. Random thoughts about kissing popped into his head every time he so much as looked at him. "Okay," Jake said "You said that the other day".
"Yeah well, I just wanted to make it crystal clear." He wasn't sure who needed the clarification more, though, Jake or himself.
"Okay..." Jake repeated "so...I'm going to go and get my bike. So..."
"Se ya," Hamilton said quickly, glad of the excuse to be out of there. He heard Jake reply something behind him.
Okay, so that didn't go so well. Next step – get a girlfriend.
------
Jake arrived at her hiding spot – it was a secluded spot Hamilton showed her the day before, claiming no one knew about it except him. It was a rather perfect hiding spot. She felt the need to talk to Bella – her thoughts were a mess and the other girl proved she could sort out things well.
When she got to the spot, though, she discovered her bike was gone. She cursed. Who took her bike!? She needed to find it, and fast. It had cost her (well, her mother) a fortune, but more important than that, it was her only means of escape when things got too much to handle.
Hamilton said no one knew about this spot. Hamilton! She started running back towards the school. Maybe he would know who took it.
She found him sitting under a tree on the grounds, surrounded by a few large golden retrievers. He looked up when she approached him.
"Hey," she said, a little out of breath "my bike is gone".
Hamilton didn't seem too interested "well, where'd you leave it?"
"In that perfect hiding spot that you showed me" she answered, a little accusing.
Hamilton shrugged "I didn't take it".
"Well then who did?" she asked in frustration.
She saw the realization dawn "oh no," he said "the groundskeeper probably confiscated it".
She felt her heart sink "oh god, you know I'm not even supposed to have that thing here. Now what do I do?" she needed that bike back!
Hamilton narrowed his eyes "what are you asking me for?"
She stared at him, taken aback. Why was he so hostile all of the sudden? "God, sorry" she snapped, turning around to leave. Who needed him anyway? She had always managed by herself, and this time would be no different.
Hamilton caught her wrist, seemingly as surprised about this as she was. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait," he said, thinking this over. "We can probably figure this out. Meet me at the main staircase tomorrow night after dinner".
Jake smiled "thanks".
-----
Hamilton sat under his favourite tree, looking around at the lumbering teenagers that filled the lawn. His dogs sat around him – he found out early in life that pets were a sure chick-magnet. A few girls already came over to talk to him or waved at him as they passed, by not one had caught his eye yet.
As if summoned by his thoughts, Jake came running over, looking worried. He half-kneeled next to Hamilton, and Hamilton was attacked by his now familiar scent, immediately putting him on edge. "Hey," the other boy said urgently, panting a little from his run "my bike is gone".
The run had thrown colour in his cheeks and mouth, making him look like he was wearing makeup. Hamilton squirmed uneasily. "Well, where'd you leave it?"
"In that perfect hiding spot that you showed me" Jake answered briskly, like it was Hamilton's fault someone found it.
"I didn't take it," he said defensively.
"Well then who did?" Jake demanded.
The obvious answer made Hamilton wince. "Oh no," he said "the groundskeeper probably confiscated it".
Jake leaned closer, and Hamilton tried not to breath. His scent was driving him crazy. "Oh god," Jake said, biting at his lower lip, and Hamilton looked away quickly. "You know I'm not even supposed to have that thing here. Now what do I do?"
The tension made Hamilton snap at him "what are you asking me for?"
Jake leaned back as though Hamilton has slapped him, looking hurt. Then his eyes hardened, his mouth setting in a thin line, and he got up, turning away "god, sorry".
Hamilton could've kicked himself. He didn't mean to hurt Jake; he was just really edgy. Without thinking, he reached out and caught Jake's wrist, halting him. It was surprisingly thin, even considering Jake was such a scrawny guy, and cold under his fingers. "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait," he said, and the other boy looked at him questioningly, anger apparently forgotten "we can probably figure this out. Meet me at the main staircase tomorrow night after dinner".
Jake's smile was like a burst of sunlight, making Hamilton uncomfortably warm. "Thanks," he said softly, and got up, walking away.
Hamilton watched him go, feeling dread settling in. He needed to get a girlfriend, and fast.
He tried not to talk to Jake too much during crew practice – which was a hard thing to do, considering he was facing him. Jake didn't seem to notice; he was obviously nervous about something, glancing at Finn every so often and shouting the pace a little too loudly. He seemed to relax when practice finished and they all arrived back at the docks.
Hamilton wondered what that was about. He didn't think the other boy was afraid of water; he wouldn't have joined the crew team if that was the case. Maybe he was just worried that Finn would make them jump in again; he seemed to hate it the other day, although he appeared to be a good swimmer.
He reminded himself not to dwell so much on what Jake did or didn't do.
He was actually rather anxious about tonight. Not that he thought Jake would try something; rather, he was afraid that in a moment of weakness he himself would do something stupid. But Jake seemed very attached to his bike – he seemed extremely upset over the loss of it – and after the way Hamilton had acted towards him yesterday, he couldn't back out of helping him now. Anyway, awkwardness aside, Jake was his friend, and friends helped each other.
It was with mixed feelings that he waited for Jake by the staircase the next night. Jake arrived a minute or two after him, not giving Hamilton too much time to prepare. He came down the stairs dressed all in black, even wearing black gloves. It was ridicules, and served to calm Hamilton a bit. Obviously, Jake had seen too many action movies.
Hamilton snorted as Jake joined him "we're recovering your motorcycle, not lifting the Mona Lisa" he said, for the first time feeling like he could mock something about Jake, too. Jake just shrugged, clearly not affected. "Come on," Hamilton said, starting in the direction of the groundskeeper office.
"I know the groundskeeper has it. I used to come down here and steal the lawnmowers, ride them around the lake". It had been one of his favourite pastimes as a kid. And every time he would get into such trouble, until he learned to return them clean and to fill the fuel tank from the barrels stored in the basement.
Jake smirked "high times at Rawley. Didn't know I was a partner with a juvenile delinquent".
Hamilton gave him a disbelieving look "you should talk". He fiddled with the lock to the basement (which was overlooked by the office), and opened it easily. Jake seemed a little impressed. "Stay quiet," Hamilton told him, and they entered.
"There it is!" Jake pointed to his bike before rushing over, passing a loving hand over its surface and checking it for any damage. Hamilton joined him, and not a moment too soon – the lights went on in the office and he ducked, pulling Jake down with him. They both watched as the groundskeeper walked in and sat in front of the TV, facing them.
Jake let out an annoyed sigh "great. Now what, we're stuck here?"
Hamilton shook his head "no, its 9 o'clock". Thank god for that. He didn't know how well he could handle being stuck here in the dark with the other boy for hours.
Jake looked at him in confusion. His eyes looked almost black in the semi-dark. "What, he gets off work?" he asked.
"No, Felicity comes on. He never misses an episode. He even cries sometimes, I swear" Hamilton said, smiling, and Jake smiled back, a flash of white in the gloom. "Sshhh," they both watched as the groundskeeper stared at the TV, dead to the world. "like clockwork, just be real quiet, he won't notice".
They got up, intending to roll the bike out of there, when the groundskeeper's howl of "what are you doing? God, Ben's in love with you, not her!" sent them down to the ground again. They exchanged looks, and burst out laughing. Hamilton covered his mouth with his hand, while Jake muffled his laugh in his sleeve. The throaty sound sent shivers down Hamilton's spine, and he got up cautiously, glancing at the office.
Jake got up after him and they rolled the bike out of the basement together.
------
Crew practice was uncomfortable; Jake kept glancing at Finn, wondering if he would decide to dunk them in today, too. I swear, if it becomes a regular occurrence, I'm quitting the team.
She made it safe and dry back to shore, though. She thought about heading into town on foot, but decided against it. She didn't know the woods all that well to take shortcuts, and walking along the road seemed like too much of a bother. She could stand to wait another day or two before she visited Bella.
The next day and a half passed quickly, and soon enough she found herself standing in front of her closet, debating. What did one wear to secret operations like this? Black, of course. She even took a pair of gloves with her, as to refrain from leaving fingerprints.
Hamilton was waiting down by the bottom of the staircase, fidgeting. He seemed amused when he saw her. "We're recovering your motorcycle, not lifting the Mona Lisa" he told her, raising an eyebrow. She shrugged. So she saw Mission Impossible too many times, so what? A person had to have some drama in his life. Though she probably had unhealthy amounts of it currently.
"Come on," he said, starting to walk in the direction of what she assumed was the groundskeeper's office "I know the groundskeeper has it. I used to come down here and steal the lawnmowers, ride them around the lake".
Jake fought the urge to giggle. She could just see mini-Hamilton, with matching jacket and helmet, doing crazy loops around the lake on a lawnmower. "High times at Rawley" she smirked "didn't know I was a partner with a juvenile delinquent"
Hamilton gave her a dirty look as they arrived at the office. "Like you should talk".
He picked the lock quickly, obviously having done it many times before. She was impressed against her will; so he wasn't such a mommy's boy after all. "Stay quiet," he warned her, and they entered.
She saw her bike immediately, beautiful and gleaming among all the garbage stored there. She hurried over to it, checking for any signs of rough handling, and to her relief found none. As Hamilton joined her the lights in office lit up, and he pulled her down with him. They saw the groundskeeper enter and sit in front of his TV. He seemed like he was planning on staying there a long time.
"Great. Now what, we're stuck here?" she huffed.
"No, its 9 o'clock" Hamilton said soothingly.
"What, he gets off work?" she didn't understand.
"No, Felicity comes on. He never misses an episode. He even cries sometimes, I swear" he smiled his gorgeous smile, making her unable not to smile back.
"Sshhh," he said as the man stared at the screen, unblinking. "Like clockwork, just be real quiet, he won't notice". They got up.
"What are you doing!?" the shout startled them both and they ducked before realizing it was directed towards the TV, not them. "God, Ben's in love with you, not her!"
They looked at each other and, seeing the other's expression, burst out laughing. She buried her face in her sleeve, not trusting herself to keep quiet, and Hamilton did the same with his hand, though she could still hear his low, half-choked snickers.
Hamilton got up carefully, with a glance to the groundskeeper, and motioned her after him. They rolled the motorcycle outside together.
It was a strange feeling, to walk the halls at night with her bike. She glanced at Hamilton; he looked uneasy, again. "I really appreciate this," she told him. "If you got caught, you'd really get into trouble. I mean, your dad's the dean".
He frowned "yeah, perpetually. From the time he wakes up to the time he goes to sleep".
She could certainly relate to that. "Yeah," she said quietly "I heard that. My mom's got her cell-phone surgically implanted".
They entered the common room. She glanced at him again, and he moved away a little, but enough for her to notice. "Oh, you know you said before" she started, feeling the need to end this once and for all "me being, you know, gay? I'm not, that I promise you. I just had a sketchy moment, but it's over. I'm just saying you don't have to feel weird around me".
He looked at her "well, I do". She must have looked put-down, because he quickly added "I'm trying not to".
She smiled at him, then the absurdity of it all hit her and she laughed "I can't believe we pulled this off. Thank God for the freight elevator".
"It's so Hardy Boys" Hamilton agreed.
"Yeah, beats Nancy Drew," she added without thinking, still laughing. He looked at her funny, but laughed too. Oops.
-----
The adrenaline rush of almost getting caught made Hamilton forget his unease for a few minutes. Now, though, when it was just the two of them standing together in the tiny freight elevator, the feeling returned at full force. Jake was slouched against a wall, chewing on his lip thoughtfully, looking up. The line of his throat seemed long and pale and impossibly smooth; just looking at it made Hamilton want to bite it. He swallowed and looked the other way, holding his breath until the elevator stopped and they got out.
"I really appreciate this," Jake said, looking at him earnestly, as they rolled the bike along the empty halls. "If you got caught, you'd really get into trouble. I mean, your dad's the dean".
He didn't need a reminder. It was a touchy subject with him. "Yeah," he muttered "perpetually. From the time he wakes up to the time he goes to sleep".
Jake nodded sympathetically. "Yeah, I heard that. My mom's got her cell-phone surgically implanted". He pouted, his lips dark and inviting, his dark hair, for once free from gel, obscuring his eyes. Hamilton wanted to push it away; instead, he moved away himself.
Jake must have caught that, because he said "oh, you know you said before, me being, you know, gay? I'm not, that I promise you. I just had a sketchy moment, but it's over. I'm just saying you don't have to feel weird around me".
A sketchy moment? Hamilton found that hard to believe. Still, he was experiencing an awful lot of sketchy moments like that himself lately, so maybe he needed to let Jake have the benefit of doubt.
"Well, I do" he said, because it was true, though probably not even Jake's fault anymore. Jake's expression turned miserable, so he added quickly "I'm trying not to". Trust me, I'm trying my best not to.
Jake smiled at him shyly, and then suddenly laughed "I can't believe we pulled this off. Thank God for the freight elevator".
Curse the freight elevator, Hamilton thought, but he agreed it was kind of cool, this operation they played out. "It's so Hardy Boys" he laughed, too.
"Yeah, beats Nancy Drew," Jake said. Hamilton frowned at him for a moment. Nancy Drew? With comments like that, Jake would have a hard time convincing anyone he's not gay.
Still, it was a surprisingly nice way to spend an evening, considering. Even though Jake made him extremely uncomfortable, he was also really fun to be around.
They reached the doors and rolled the bike outside, intent on finding a new hiding spot.
------
The next day, Jake spent the morning on her computer. Around lunch time, though, she was starting to feel a little hungry. She saw that diner across from Bella's garage the last time she's been there, and she intended to go visit Bella anyway, so she decided she might as well combine the two. On her way out she passed the open doors of the common room, and, seeing Hamilton among the boys watching TV inside, decided to invite him along. He had helped her yesterday, and he had said he wanted a ride on the bike, after all. She headed over, kneeling next to the sofa, as he was sitting on the edge. "Hey," she said.
He looked away from the show he was watching. Ugh, wrestling. "Heya," he said.
"So, who's fighting?" she asked. Not that she was interested one bit in the answer; it was just that wrestling was a very manly thing.
"The Mangler and Rock Hard Richard Baxter" he answered, like it was supposed to mean something to her.
"Oh cool," she said indifferently. "So thanks again for last night". She noticed him look around uncomfortably, so she added "I'm really glad to have my bike back".
Hamilton nodded briefly "no, no problem".
She smiled "god, it was hilarious bringing that bike through here". Hamilton didn't even look at her, not to mention dignify her with an answer. "Well, um, I was going to take it out for a ride and thought the least I could do is see if you wanted to come, cruise by the Rawley babes, sound like fun?" she couldn't believe she was saying that. Cruising by the Rawley babes? The last thing she needed was for another girl to hit on her. Grace Banks was more than enough.
Hamilton ignored her, staring fixedly at the screen. Right, she thought. Apparently our truce is over. She got up without saying anything, and headed out, throwing one last look at him over her shoulder. He didn't notice.
Jake fumed all the way to her bike. She didn't understand him at all! One minute he was Mr. charming, and then, before she knew what hit her, he was pretending she didn't exist. This wasn't how friendship was supposed to look like. And it wasn't even over the gay thing! She explained, he accepted, he said he was trying not to feel weird around her. He seemed fine with it yesterday!
Boys were such a waste of time!
She got her bike out and headed out to town. When she arrived at the garage, though, only Grace Banks was there. The girl gave her a flirty look, and Jake sighed inwardly.
"Hi, Grace," she said, and Grace sauntered over "is Bella inside?"
Grace stopped, her smile replaced by a scowl. "Why does everyone want Bella?" she asked angrily, her hands on her hips. She turned around and headed back inside, throwing a "she's at the dinner" over her shoulder.
"Right," Jake muttered, heading over to the diner. The sign above it announced is was called "Friendly's". She pushed the door open and entered.
Bella was sitting at the counter, talking to Will and Scout who were both in uniform. Strange. Will she understood, but she knew Scout was loaded. She smiled – he probably did it to be close to Bella.
The three of them looked over as she entered, the boys offering her polite smiles; Bella, however, grinned widely and hopped down from her stool, throwing her arms around Jake in a hug. "Where have you been?" she asked, arms still around Jake "I haven't seen you for a few days now!"
Jake patted her awkwardly on the back, conscious of the bewildered (and in Scout's case, angry) looks the others were giving her. "Bella," she whispered urgently "to everyone else I'm a guy, remember?"
Bella froze, then stepped back, looking sheepish. "Right," she said, glancing back at scout and Will and wincing "I forget".
Scout was still looking between them, eyes narrowed. "You two know each other?" he asked.
Bella shrugged "we met a few days ago."
Scout's expression turned stormy "you're being awfully friendly for people who just met a few days ago".
Bella frowned "Scout," she said, her tone a warning.
Scout looked down, flushing darkly, and muttered something Jake didn't hear, but she could bet it wasn't pleasant.
"Someone's jealous," she sing-songed to Bella, expecting her to smile. However, Bella's frown deepened, and she wouldn't meet her eyes. "Can we go back to the garage and talk?" she asked quietly.
"Sure," Jake answered, puzzled. Something was obviously wrong. She'll just get her lunch later.
Bella grabbed her hand, pulling her out of the diner.
Scout looked at the two of them, his face dark. "I don't like that Jake guy one bit," he said to Will. Will was looking at them, too. "He's a good guy," Will answered, turning to look at his friend. "You can't dislike every guy Bella's friendly with. You don't have that right anymore, remember?"
"Thanks for rubbing it in," Scout muttered, than added more loudly "and that wasn't just friendly. They were hugging and holding hands!"
Will seemed thoughtful "that sure was odd, I'll give you that".
Meanwhile, Jake followed Bella to the Garage. Bella opened the door, leading her inside and up a staircase. She pushed open the door to a room and after Jake entered, closed the door. She motioned to the bed "sit down".
Jake sat down, looking around her. The room was pleasant and tidy, the walls coloured soft lavender, the windows and bed covered in white curtains and bedspread. A few posters and photos hung on the walls; more photos were taped on the mirror that hung on the back of the door.
"Nice room," she said.
"Thanks," Bella fidgeted.
"So?" Jake asked.
"So what?" Bella asked, shifty.
"So what's with you and Scout? You didn't break up already did you?"
The other girl didn't answer, and Jake stared at her "oh my god, you did! Why?"
"We… how's it going with Hamilton?"
"You're not changing the subject," Jake told her.
Bella let out a frustrated sigh "I'll tell you, I promise, I just have to work up to it. So answer my question".
It was Jake's turn to sigh "not so good," she admitted. "I talked to him, and explained I was not gay, that it was just a sketchy moment, and he seemed to accept that… He even helped me steal my bike back from the groundskeeper. But today, he totally blew me off. Acted like he couldn't even hear me talking to him," she finished, tugging on her hair in frustration.
Bella winced in sympathy "you're completely into him, aren't you?" she asked.
"Maybe," Jake wasn't willing to admit anything just yet. "Anyway, enough about my problems. What's up with you and Scout? If it's something stupid –"
"It's not," Bella interrupted her, looking miserable. "I wish it was, it's so completely horrible I can't even grasp it fully".
"Okay, now you're freaking me out," Jake said.
Bella took a deep breath. "My dad – Charlie – he's not my biological father. My mother had an affair, but he married her anyway. He's my real father, he's the one that raised me, but… he's not the one I'm genetically related to".
"Oh god," Jake gaped at her, paling "please tell me you're not saying what I think you're saying…"
Bella's face contorted, her eyes shining "my mother had an affair with John Calhoun, Scout's father. Scout's my half-brother."
She started crying. Jake gathered her into her arms, at a loss. She wasn't that big on emotional displays; they always made her uncomfortable. She wanted to comfort Bella, but she didn't have the slightest idea where to begin. In the end she just held her and smoothed her hair until she calmed down.
Bella sat up, wiping her eyes angrily "I'm sorry," she sniffed "I got your shirt all wet".
"Don't be stupid," Jake answered, waving it aside. "I'm here for you if you need me. Even if you just need someone to wipe your nose on," she added, smiling.
"Gross," Bella said, but she gave her a watery smile back. "Thanks, I mean it."
"Anytime," Jake said, then glanced at her watch. She blanched "I have crew practice in twenty minutes. If I'm late, I'll have to swim to the boat, in this" she indicated her outfit "I'd rather just quit".
"Go," Bella said immediately.
"Are you sure?" Jake asked, hesitating. "It's okay, I'm not all that big on crew anyway, and Finn's creepy. I just joined because it seemed manly".
"No, I'm okay, go," Bella said, laughing. "I'll see you later. Can't have you missing your manly occupations".
"Okay," Jake said, getting up. They hugged "be good," Jake told her, before heading downstairs. She got out and on her bike, ignoring Grace's suggestive leer (she did come out of Bella's room, after all) and high-tailed it back to Rawley.
-----
Hamilton was sitting in the common room, watching a wrestling match, when Jake came in and crouched beside him "hey".
He glanced at him "heya".
Jake turned to the screen, looking bored out of his mind "so, who's fighting?"
"The Mangler and Rock Hard Richard Baxter" Hamilton answered, pretending to be deeply engrossed in the match. It was rather boring, but it was manly and tough, and he needed manly and tough right now.
"Oh cool," Jake said, before adding "so thanks again for last night". Hamilton looked around quickly; a few boys were giving them strange looks, having heard Jake's statement. "I'm really glad to have my bike back", Jake clarified, and the boys looked away.
"No, no problem," Hamilton answered, wanting to end this conversation quickly before something embarrassing happened. He could smell Jake too well this close, could practically count his eyelashes. He kept his eyes glued to the screen.
"God, it was hilarious bringing that bike through here" Jake snickered quietly. Hamilton didn't dare to look at him. "Well, um, I was going to take it out for a ride and thought the least I could do is see if you wanted to come," Jake continued, a little awkwardly. "Cruise by the Rawley babes, sound like fun?"
Sitting with Jake on the same bike, pressed against him? Yes, it sounded like fun. The kind of fun Hamilton wasn't supposed to find fun. He ignored Jake. The other boy waited a few more moments before getting up without a word, striding away quickly. Hamilton glanced at his retreating back, its tense lines conveying the hurt clearly.
He bit the inside of his cheek. He hated hurting Jake, but he had no choice. He couldn't accept his offer, and he couldn't explain why, either. Maybe it was a good thing, that Jake was angry at him. Maybe Hamilton needed a little time away from him.
He turned back to the match, trying to concentrate, but it was no use. All he could think about was Jake.