"…I know that almost all of you mentioned Spencer handling things too well after all he's been through, but he's not. In the last chap, he was just trying to convince himself he was. ;) Thnx for reading everyone; it's been an interesting ride…! "

Addicted Innocence-Epilogue

Ready, Set….

Four Months Later

"Spencer, there's someone here that I wanted you to meet. I think that he can help you, and I'm positive that you can help him. Would you like to see him?"

Spencer just nodded at his therapist, obviously annoyed at her tone of voice. The BAU had required the young agent at least four months off and two months of weekly therapy. Natalie, his therapist' name, had called him in early this week. She said that she had something she wanted to share with him, and he had agreed to come in.

"I believe you actually know him already, actually. His name is Ezra Hale, and he was Marcus Stanne's first victim."

Spencer paled at the mention of those names. 'Marcus Stanne- I guess he wasn't lying about his name- at least, his first.' He thought. 'And Ezra- poor Ezra. He must've been so much younger than me when Marcus raped him. According to the profile-' but Spencer stopped himself. The profile didn't matter anymore. The case had been four months ago; trying to move on should be his main goal now.

"Would you mind talking to him? It would be a private conversation, I assure. It would-"

"Yes, I'll…. I'll talk to him." Spencer nodded.

"Well, good." Natalie smiled. "If you would just excuse you for a few minutes, I will come back with him." With a nod from his patient, Natalie stood up and left the room.

Spencer watched as his therapist walked out of the room and waited. Once she was out of sight, he whipped out his cell phone and dialed the familiar number. He waited for voice on the other end to answer impatiently and was about to give up when….

"Hello?"

"Morgan." Reid sighed in relief.

"What's up? Aren't you at therapy…?"

"Yeah, but I just wanted to talk to your for a minute."

"What about, Pretty Boy?" Morgan frowned.

"Could you…will you…?" Reid stuttered. "Tell me it'll be okay."

"It'll be okay, Spencer. I promise." Morgan said. "But after this, I wanna know what's going on, okay?"

"Of course, but I have to go now. She's coming back."

"All right." Morgan sighed. "I'll see you when you get home."

"Okay." Reid nodded. "Bye." With that, he hung up and stuffed his phone back in his pocket. Just as he stuffed his phone back into his pocket, his therapist walked into the room with a young man cautiously entering behind her.

"Spencer, this is Ezra. He contacted me a few weeks ago to suggest meeting with you. I'm going to let you two stay in here, and I'll wait out in the conference room. Okay?" With a nod from the two young men, she left the room.

Ezra and Spencer looked at each other for a moment before sitting down. They could both see the haunted look in each other's eyes, and they both knew what had happened. Finally, with a shaky breath, Spencer looked up at Ezra again and nodded.

"How… how are you coping?" Spencer asked.

"Just as well as you are." Ezra admitted. "The first time it happened to be, I was sixteen. But the second time… Well, the second time was four months ago."

"Again? Marcus found you…?" That had been new to Spencer. No one had told him that Ezra had been one of the victims found, and if he would have known, he was have definitely talked to him sooner.

"Yeah." Ezra nodded. "I asked them not to tell you. I knew that you'd want to talk to me, but I wasn't ready for that. I am now, though, and I think you are, too."

"I am, actually." Spencer said. "My boyfriend tried talking to me about it, and he does understand, but it doesn't feel right. I don't want him to have to think about the horrible things that were done to me. I couldn't put him through that."

"I understand." Ezra sighed. "My boyfriend and I broke up because of it. I just couldn't give him what he wanted anymore, and he wouldn't have it. I suppose I'm better off without him, but I'm going to wait before I throw myself into a new relationship."

"You're smart, Ezra. Maybe you could try to go back to school, get a steady job. I know it doesn't sound easy, but if you try hard enough, I think you could succeed. They have government grants you could apply for and-"

"I appreciate it, Spencer, but I've all ready decided what I'm going to do. I'm going to continue stripping, even after all that I've been through because of it. I know it may not make a lot of sense to you, but it does to me." Ezra smiled sadly at Spencer, who in return offered a similar smile.

"I can't say I understand, but if you think it's best, then stay." Reid nodded.

For more than hour, Spencer and Ezra talked back and forth about what Marcus had done to them and other sideline conversations. They enjoyed talking to each other about what had happened because they both understood, and they both knew the damage that it had caused them. Spencer talked about how hard it was for him to have his 'first time' with a complete stranger who had broke into his apartment and beat him up. He talked about how supportive Morgan had been throughout the whole thing and how grateful he was to have him. Jared admitted that if someone hadn't found Marcus raping him behind the bleachers at school that he probably wouldn't have told anyone. He was glad that someone had, though, because it had ended up helping people, like Spencer himself, later on. He told Spencer that he didn't know if he could recover a second time, but he had someone made it through, and for that he was eternally grateful.

Finally, after about one and a half hours, they decided that it was time to go their separate ways. The two young men stood up and hugged. Tears in their eyes and sad smiles on their faces, they said good-bye and parted ways with promises to talk again and keep in touch.

Spencer walked to his car feeling much better than he had in a while. He was glad that he had been given the opportunity to talk to Ezra, and he hoped that the other man felt the same way. With one last glance at his therapy office, Spencer climbed into his car and hit the gas petal.

Two Weeks after the Session

Spencer waited in the bedroom leaning heavily against the pole. He didn't know if he was ready for it, but he knew he had to try. He let his hands slide down the leather fronts of his skin-tight pants and then smoothed down his purple shirt. Although he didn't care for it, he had even put on the mascara and eyeliner. He didn't complete the outfit, though; he was NOT dying his hair again.

Spencer tensed when he heard the doorknob turn. He made himself loosen up before his boyfriend entered the room, and when he did, he pushed him down on the bed.

"Spencer! What the...?"

"Shh…" Spencer whispered as his lips touched Morgan's. Spencer felt his lover return the passionate kiss, and he inwardly smiled. He leaned closer to Morgan and stated undoing his lover's buttons, prompting him to do the same.

"Spencer, are you sure you want to do this?" Morgan asked.

"Yes, I'm sure." Spencer responded shakily. He knew that he wasn't ready for it, but he had to try. Ignoring what had happened to him wasn't as easy as he thought it'd be, even if Morgan was with him now. "I have to be able to do this."

"No, you don't. You were raped- repeatedly! No one's expecting you to jump back into this right now. I can wait, and so can you."

"No, I can't wait! If I wait, then I'm letting them win. I don't want that." Spencer snapped back. "I'm better than that; what they did to me should be easier for me to handle!"

"Spencer, sit down." Morgan sighed. When he saw his boyfriend open his mouth to protest, he shushed him and waited until he sat down again. Reluctantly, Spencer sat down beside Morgan and let himself lean against him.

He was trying to move on, to be able to be touched again. He trusted Morgan, and Morgan trusted him. Why was it so hard? Why couldn't he put on that pair of leather pants and its matching shirt and 'dance' for his boyfriend? He had done it before- and in front of other people! When he had done it before, he hadn't chose to do it willingly. Now, as he sat down with a wave of tears springing from his eyes and his boyfriend's hands around his chest, he was doing it willing.

Spencer quickly wiped away the tears from his eyes and tried avoiding Morgan's gaze. Flashbacks from his 'training sessions' were creeping up on him again, and he was starting to lose his focus. Slowly, his mind was making him relive the horror that he had been put through.

"Hey, he's not here." Morgan whispered. Hw watched as his lover's dark eyes filled with terror, and he gently pulled him down against his chest. He cradled the younger man as he broke out into sobs. His hand automatically reached for Spencer's hair and started stroking it as his other hand wrapped itself around Spencer's petite frame. "Shh, it's okay now. It's over."

"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" Reid whimpered. He buried his head against Morgan's chest and let his hands grab fistfuls of Morgan's shirt as he desperately tried to stop the flashbacks. To his dismay, he couldn't, though, but Morgan seemed to understand. He didn't move an inch from his position; he was ready to support his lover when he needed it more than ever. He wouldn't abandon him when he was feeling so terrible; he couldn't bare the thought of him having to go through this alone.

"It's okay, Spencer. There's nothing to be sorry for, all right?"

"I know, it's just… I'm sorry. I thought I could handle this."

"Hey, that's okay, Pretty Boy. I'm here for you. I'm going to be here every step of the way. You don't have to go through this alone; I know what it's like to be hurt that way." Morgan whispered. "We'll get through this, one step at a time. Spencer?" When Morgan realized that Spencer wasn't replying, he looked down. A smile tugged at the edges of his lips when he realized that Spencer had fallen to sleep. He always looked so peaceful when he slept, which was about the only time he looked peaceful anymore. Deciding there was no point in staying up, Morgan snuggled Spencer closer to him and closed his eyes, knowing all along that recovery was coming, but it was coming slowly. He wouldn't leave Spencer during such a crucial time, but right now they both needed to sleep. With thoughts of Spencer on his mind, Derek Morgan fell to sleep.

Fin.

"… Ta-da! I rewrote this 10 times, no joke! This is my favorite version, and trust me, you would agree with me if you read the other ones. I know it seems kinda rushed and too full, but I did the best I could- honest! Thnx for reiding everyone! Spencey cookies w/ angst sprinkles on top for the lot of you…!"