Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Twilight characters, but this plot line is all mine ;).

Author's Note: Hey guys, the new update is here, and guess what, it's a LONG one! Typically my posts have been running between 8,000 and 9,000 words, well this one is something on the order of 12,700. So get comfortable and be prepared for a bit o'drama and alot of switching off POVs! Hope you enjoy!

10. Heart to Hearts and Really Bad Timing

Emmett POV

I watched the door close after Alice, Jasper, and my Rosie walked through it before turning to see Bella disappear down the hallway toward the bathroom. I pulled out my cell phone and sent off a quick text to Edward letting him know that the coast was clear. If he wanted to get his talk in with Bella to straighten things out before this disaster of a date tomorrow, it was now or never.

I have to admit that when I first realized what was going on between Edward and Bella, even though neither one of them could see it, I was pissed off. Edward was my best friend but I knew full well exactly how big of a prick he was and I didn't want him to touch my sister with a fifty-foot pole. Matter of fact, I was so set against it I was about ready to kick him to the curb to keep him away from my sweet innocent sister. She had already been hurt enough by her first two boyfriends and I didn't want to see her hurt again. But then the second day after I made the realization I watched as Edward spent time with Bella. Any time Edward would talk to or interact with Bella his whole persona changed…he appreciated her in a way that I had never seen him show respect to another human being - including his aunt and uncle who raised him. Edward really listened when Bella spoke and while he would joke around and tease her, he was never cruel or crude with her…miraculously enough Edward the manwhore was actually a gentleman with my sister. It was then that I knew that someday my little sister would be the girl who would change Edward Masen's whole world…that is, when he finally took his head out of his ass long enough to realize it.

I started to move into my bedroom in order to distract myself and stay out of the way while they talked when I noticed Bella coming back down the hallway toward me with a determined look on her face. I tried to hide the grimace expecting one of several things: either she was pissed and I was about to catch hell, she was upset and wanted a shoulder to cry on which I always provided but never really felt like I was very good at, or she wanted to talk to me about something serious but she was concerned as to what my reaction was going to be. I looked around seeing no path of escape, so instead I settled into the cushions of the couch and tried to mentally prepare myself for whatever was coming.

Bella crossed the room and came to sit on the other end of the couch with her legs crossed under her with her whole body facing me. She tucked her hands thoughtfully into her lap. Okay…so it was time for a serious discussion of which she was worried about my reaction.

"Emmett, can I ask you a question?" she asked timidly looking down at her hands as her thumbs twiddled in her lap.

"Sure kiddo, what's up?"

She looked up at me with real worry in her eyes as they locked with mine. "Am I holding you back?"

I'm sure my surprise was evident on my face. Why in the hell would she think she was holding me back?

"Holding me back? What do you mean?"

She looked down at her hands with that sadness welling in her eyes that she really only shared with me, the rest of the time she hid it behind walls of sarcasm and swagger. "I mean am I keeping you from living your life? Am I the reason that you haven't moved forward in your relationship with Rose? Is that why you haven't moved in with her or asked her to marry you yet?"

I felt completely blindsided. How the fuck do I answer this question? I made it a point to never lie to Bella, especially when asked something directly. Do I feel like she's holding me back? No. But at the same time would I already be living with Rose if I didn't have Bella to worry about? Probably.

I know that I'm all she has left, and she's not ready right now to be living on her own, not with the stresses of her internship. Of all the years she's struggled through school, this has definitely been the most stressful for her. I'm certainly not going to add to that stress by moving out in the middle of it. But do I feel resentment toward her because of the situation? Hell NO! I love my sister and I would never give up the chance to help her out and make sure she's okay.

"Em?" I heard Bella ask with tension rising in her voice. I was taking too long to answer and she was becoming upset at the thought that she was holding me back.

"Sorry Bells, I was just trying to think of the right way to answer you. No, I don't feel like you are holding me back. I'm exactly where I want to be right now. Would I like to live with Rose? Sure, but it's not like there's a rush or anything. I love Rosie and she loves me and that's what's important. I know beyond any doubt that we are going to spend the rest of our lives together, so another year or two before we share a home isn't that big a deal."

I watched Bella's face closely and I could tell that my words were not enough to keep her guilt at bay. Her face fluctuated through several different emotions before it settled on sadness and guilt as the tears began to flow down her face.

"Emmett, I'm so sorry! I've messed up your life so much. Your life is nothing like it should have been. I got in the way of you enjoying your college years and now I'm getting in the way of you moving on with your life with the woman that you love. It's not right. You shouldn't still be sacrificing your happiness for mine!"

I opened my mouth to protest but she looked up with determination as she covered my mouth. "No, don't argue. I know it's true. Here's the thing…I'm a grown woman now and I'm fully capable of taking care of myself. I want you to move out Emmett. I want you to go move in with Rosalie and move on with the rest of your life. You deserve it and you don't need to be babysitting me anymore."

I was shaking my head since her hand was still firmly planted over my mouth desperate to talk her out of her overzealous notions.

"No, Emmett, no arguments. I will find a new roommate or something…one way or another I'll figure it out, but you and Rose deserve to be happy. I will not let your happiness be dependent on the timeline of my life. Now you go call Rose right now and ask her to combine your lives and hopefully she won't mind if you move in with her since this apartment is so convenient for me with the hospital. If that doesn't work then I'll find a place of my own or move into Rose's place and she can move in here, but either way you two are going to be moving in together by the end of the month. Got it?!"

I chuckled at my bossy little sister. "Bella, this isn't necessary. I don't want to move. Things are fine the way they are."

"Emmett Charles Swan…get your ass in your room and call your girlfriend and ask her to live with you right now or so help me I'll knee you in the nuts!"

Just as she said that I heard the knock on the door indicating that Edward had arrived so I held my hands up in defeat and retreated to my room to call Rose. I wasn't sure if I was ready to move out and leave my baby sister on her own just yet, but I knew that this was an argument I wasn't going to be winning. When Bella made up her mind about something you might as well give in…besides I would stay close and if it didn't work out I could always move back. And I had to admit that the idea of not having to leave Rose or have her leave me at night was very tempting.

I closed the door to my room as I heard Edward's voice carry down the hallway. I crossed over to my stereo turning it on to give the a bit more privacy before picking up my cell phone and calling Rose to tell her about Bella's proclamation. I figured she would either laugh telling me to move my ass in as soon as possible or get annoyed and tell me to call back when I'm asking on my own and not being bullied into it by my younger sister.

BPOV

I stood there staring at Edward's darkly circled eyes already feeling emotionally drained from my heart to heart with Emmett. I was not in any mood to face the drama that was Edward tonight especially when I was still barely vertical after only having three hours of sleep over the past two days.

"Can I come in?" Edward asked sounding nearly as exhausted as I felt.

"Sure." I moved aside and closed the door behind him before following him further into the living room.

"Um, these are for you," he said with a sheepish smile handed me a bouquet of lavender Calla Lilies, which just happened to be my favorite.

I blushed a bit and looked down at the beautiful flowers taking them timidly from his hands. "Thank you, they're beautiful."

He smiled and I could see a slight twinkle in his eyes. "You are very welcome; consider them a thank you for last night. I know this is going to sound strange, but that was the best sleep I have gotten in as long as I can remember."

I blinked at him a few times trying to make sure that I was actually awake and not having another one of my Harlequin inspired dreams because this was really quite un-Edward-like behavior. I reached my free arm behind my back pinching my the flesh of my back and finding that I was in fact awake, and not only that, Edward was staring at me looking a bit sheepish and embarrassed as I fumbled for the right response to his comment.

"Uh, you're welcome…and I slept really well myself." I felt the blush deepen on my cheeks then I remembered my earlier conversation with Alice about my actions in my sleep and wondered anxiously if I hadn't kissed him in my sleep as well.

Suddenly I realized we were still standing awkwardly in the living room and I still had the flowers in my hand. I gestured for Edward to have a seat on the couch while I went to get a vase from the kitchen for the flowers. I struggled to gain control over my nerves as I walked to the kitchen retrieving the vase and adding water before placing the flowers in it and returning to the living room to sit it on the entertainment center.

"I know it's late and you're tired, but I really wanted us to talk and not let all this drama between us drag out another day. I miss you."

I crossed the room with a smile and collapsed on the couch next to him. "Well that's not really my fault now is it? I'm not the one who was running away from you for the past two weeks after initiating a kiss in Andy's hospital room."

He dropped his head back against the cushion and sighed, his hand immediately reaching up to grasp the bridge of his nose. "I know, oh God do I know. I fucked everything up to high heaven and I know it's all completely my fault."

"Not going to hear any argument from me slick," I retorted sarcastically trying to lighten the mood because it was strange for things to be so serious between Edward and me.

He glanced over at me with a halfhearted smirk before I continued. "I'll be honest though, I missed you too and we both know that if I weren't having my own freak out about talking to you I wouldn't have let you run away for two weeks either. I would have chased you down and made your stupid ass talk to me, so I have to take some blame, at least for that part."

He laughed, "I guess that's true, but the bulk of the responsibility from beginning to end lies totally on my head and I'm sorry. I'm sorry about all of it."

At this point I turned my face away and bit my lip trying to hold back the emotion that was threatening to come forth because his admission included the kiss and I really didn't want that to have been a simple mistake. Deep down inside I was hoping that there was more to that kiss and to have it so blatantly dismissed stung terribly. I continued to listen behind the curtain of my hair separating our faces as I attempted to clamp down my boiling emotions and keep them from seeping through my eyes in the form of telltale tears.

"I should never have kissed you and then just ignored you like that. I am so, so sorry for that. To be honest I sort of psyched myself into believing that you didn't think it meant anything and that there was nothing to talk about, even though I should have known better. Then there was the whole Maggie mess…oh God that was the stupidest thing I have ever done."

I felt my stomach clench as the memories of seeing him splayed out on that couch with Maggie, his hand already buried under the fabric of her sleazy red lace bra. I mean what self respecting nurse wears that kind of underwear with scrubs for crying out loud!

"I really don't know what I was thinking other than like I told you last night, she was a good little actress putting on a show and all I was thinking was that it could be a chance to show you that I was someone worthy of your respect and friendship. I was blind to the fact that she wasn't the sweet girl she pretended to be and that after the kiss we shared that it wouldn't be a total slap in your face for me to get involved with her. It was just one great big clusterfuck and I'm sorry for all of it."

He turned to me now on the couch and reached over to pull my face to look back at his and then put his hand back on his lap as he continued. "The truth of the matter is Bella, you mean more to me than any other woman on this planet and I would never consciously hurt you. I hope you know that."

I stared into his deep green eyes that were so full of sincerity and my heart instantly melted. For a moment I wanted to believe that his words meant much more than they really did, that the feelings he had for me were of a more romantic persuasion, even in spite of knowing his record and that it would most likely end in heartbreak. I couldn't help it, as much as I tried not to; I was falling for a born heartbreaker.

I gulped and shook my head a bit trying to pull myself back to reality as I willed myself to answer and not let my conflicted emotions show on my face. "I know Edward."

We sat in quiet for a few minutes watching each other timidly. Three separate times I saw his hand twitch and pick up from his lap only to return to its original position and rub against his thigh. I watched a few different emotions flit across his face before I saw his jaw tighten and he began to speak the words he finally decided on.

"So I hear the guy from the bar is a new doctor and you're going on a date with him."

I looked up at him in surprise wondering how he had heard about the Trevor date already, before realizing that Alice must have told Jasper who in turn blabbed to Edward. Damn, I had so wanted to keep the Trevor situation to myself until I could figure out what was going on there. The last thing I needed was for the boys to go all caveman on me before I ever knew if I actually even liked the guy or not.

"Yeah, he caught me when I was leaving work tonight and asked me to join him for dinner, but I already had plans with the girls, so he asked about tomorrow night and I agreed. I kind of feel bad for him being new to Chicago and all. It's not a big deal, just dinner and a bit of a tour of the city and then calling it a night. I have day shift all week so it's not going to be a big deal or anything." I was rambling…I couldn't help it though. The more I talked the more Edward seemed to slump on the couch, which confused me.

"Oh," he answered in a bit more of a whisper and looked down at his hands fidgeting on his lap. It was so strange to see Edward acting so timid and quiet. Edward was always the cocky type, all swagger and snark, always ready with a know-it-all comeback or sarcastic remark. The longer I sat there watching him the more confused I got.

We sat in the quiet a few minutes before he looked up at me with a furrowed brow. "Bella, please don't go out with that guy. He's bad news. Trust me; he's up to no good."

I felt my body tense and my own brow furrow; my arms crossed and I went immediately on the defensive. "Edward, you don't know anything about him. How would you know? You can't make judgments about people like that without even getting to know them. You've never even spoken two words to the guy."

He sat up straighter in his seat and crossed his arms, his voice getting louder the longer he spoke. "I know a hell of a lot more than you do Bella. You are just so blinded by what you want to see that you can't see what's right in front of your face. He's a player Bella. He was working you from the first minute he said hello to you. I watched the whole damn thing from across the room. He watched you dance with the girls and purposefully ignored you when you sat down to draw interest. After he started talking you he ignored Sabrina to boost your self-esteem and then he slowly worked on getting you to let down your guard. It was a classic player move and I sat there and watched you fall for it hook, line, and sinker."

I answered back with my voice growing equally louder as I stood up gesturing at Edward in my anger. "What the hell Edward?! You were sitting there all night critiquing my interactions with people. What gives you the right? And not only that, but maybe it wasn't an act. Maybe he's a little shy, or wasn't sure if I would be interested…just because that's how you work doesn't mean that the entire male population would do operate the same way. Not everyone is always working an angle."

We were in an all out yelling match. Edward stood to face me and we stood toe to toe. "See Bella, you're so blind. Just because you are a good person doesn't mean that everyone you run into is going to be a good person too. God, don't you see? I just don't want to see that asshole hurt you!"

"Oh, so you're the only one allowed to hurt me and get away with it huh?" It was a low blow and I knew it. I saw him wince a moment before the anger burned in his green irises again. "And let me tell you something else…just because you're an arrogant asshole that uses women for his own pleasure and tosses them aside doesn't mean that everyone you run into is going to be like that either! Fuck Edward! I just don't get you! You obviously don't want me, but you don't want me to be with anybody else either. You've done this for years…always running off anyone who might possibly be interested in me…keeping me tragically alone while you go and get your rocks off with whatever bimbo is closest, keeping me safely at home to come home to and talk to and be your friend."

Then my eyes grew wide as realization hit, "Holy Shit! Damn, I never saw it before. I'm your fucking whore!"

He stepped closer and we were now inches apart, both of us panting a little in our anger. "EXCUSE ME?! What the FUCK are you talking about?" Edward yelled in my face as his eyes grew wide and his eyebrows wrinkled in confusion. "I have never touched you. The only thing I have ever done was kiss you that one time, and then I kept my distance from you after that so you wouldn't think that, so how the hell can you accuse me of that now?"

I shook my head feeling my lips purse into a narrow line. "Oh no Edward, you never touched me, you had all your little sluts to take care of your physical needs. No, no…I am something even worse. I am your EMOTIONAL whore. I'm the little girl you keep single and off to the side to run to and talk to and meet whatever emotional needs you have…always keeping me off the market and at your ready disposal when you feel the need to have an emotional connection with another human being."

"Oh Bella, would you stop! You're being ridiculous!"

"Am I Edward? Am I really? Can you honestly say that a part of you didn't run off all of those other guys in my life in my past because you wanted to keep me all to yourself? Didn't you feel somewhere deep inside that if little Bella managed to actually find someone else to have a relationship with that suddenly you would lose your one legitimate relationship in your life outside of the guys? Come on Edward…be honest…be honest with me and yourself for once."

He stared at me for a long time, still tense with his jaw muscles tightly clenched, but his eyes held something else. I knew that anger wasn't really present anymore, but I couldn't pinpoint what was there. I stood my ground outwardly, keeping my eyes locked on his, my arms crossed, my body at attention, but inside a herd of butterflies had taken up residence and were in full frantic flight. I found myself instantly battling the impulse to reach out to molest his soft messy bronze hair with my hands while assaulting his lips with my own. His dark deep green eyes penetrated my own with such intensity it sent shivers down my spine. I closed my fists tighter in an effort to make my body hold its ground.

Finally after what felt like an eternity I saw his body relax a little and his shoulders slumped again and he was once again this new strange unsure Edward that I had never seen before. "Maybe," he replied weakly.

"Maybe?" I wasn't expecting his answer. I expected him to argue, to rail against my proclamation, to deny it all. I also wasn't expecting my own reaction to his response…excitement. Somewhere deep inside it thrilled me that I really was something more to him emotionally than a sister figure.

He opened his mouth and his hand went up as he took a half step toward me; his face soft and his eyes glistening slightly and then he stopped looking conflicted. I cocked my head in confusion trying to discern what was going on in his mind; nothing about Edward's reactions were making sense to me tonight.

"Bella…" He started and then stopped again, looking down at his shoes before shaking his head and plunging his hands in his pockets. "Fuck, I feel like a damn thirteen year old trying to ask a girl to a dance."

My eyes widened at the idea. What did this mean? What was he trying to say?

He looked up again and took a deep breath. "Bella…I…I think you're not entirely wrong about the whole 'keeping you for myself to meet my emotional needs' thing. You've always been special to me. I could always talk to you in a way that I've never been able to talk to anybody else, not the guys, not my parents, not my Aunt and Uncle, not anybody. So maybe in the back of my mind I was doing that in a way, but I think there was more to it than that. Bella…I…"

His voice trailed off again and I watched, waiting to hear what he would say next as my heart pounded in my chest. "I….I," I watched as he stuttered looking so uncomfortable and then he flushed red and ducked his head. "It's late; I need to let you get to sleep."

My heart sank. I knew that wasn't what he was going to say, that whatever it was would be monumental and that he couldn't find the guts to put it out there right now. He was still doing it. He was always going to do it. He pulled me in and let me be close to him, but only a certain distance before he would throw up his walls and block me out again. He hinted and played with his self imposed intimacy boundaries where I was concerned. But he would never be a man, take a step up to follow through with any of the things he really felt for me and there was definitely more there behind his eyes than a sisterly bond. Behind those beautiful green eyes I finally recognized the emotion hiding there…it was love…but he couldn't accept it or admit it to me or anyone else. I closed my eyes trying to push back the tears that were threatening to spill as I replied in a defeated tone. "Okay Edward, thank you for the flowers. Have a good night."

"Good night Bella," he whispered, laying his hand on my bicep as he passed me walking to the door. I felt the warmth of his touch tingling in my arm even after it was removed and the tears refused to stay at bay any longer.

Before I knew what I was doing I heard my voice crack in the air. "Edward?" I didn't turn to look at him, but I heard his footsteps stop behind me.

"Yes?" He asked, his voice barely audible behind me. I could tell from the sound of it that he was still facing away from me as well and I threw in the towel.

"Be careful on your way home and I hope you sleep well tonight."

There was a long pause before he finally answered back, "Thanks Bella…you too."

Moments later I heard the apartment door open and close. I was alone again as the sobs began to make my shoulders shudder and I sank to my knees. Try as I might, I couldn't hold back my emotions any longer. Jasper was right, I loved that man, as bull headed, whorish, and emotionally stunted as he might be, I still loved him in spite of it all. I really had fallen for a heartbreaker, and without even trying he was slowly destroying my heart. If I had any chance for survival, I needed to move on to find love or eventually there would be nothing left of my heart to crush.

I stayed there for a while letting my tears flow. I wallowed in my feelings of defeat before finally getting up and making my way to my bedroom now more determined than ever to make the best of my date the next night with Trevor. Trevor might not be the one to mend my broken heart, but if I don't give him a chance then I will never know.

I climbed into my bed and despite the fact that I only had three hours of sleep over the past two days, I found sleep difficult to come by, finally drifting off sometime around two in the morning.

EPOV

I walked through the door of the apartment and out to the street where I slowly headed toward my building, kicking myself harder with every step.

Fuck, fuck, fuck! How fucking hard it is it to look the beautiful woman in the eye who you know is the only one that will ever hold your heart and tell her you love her? Three little, tiny, simple words…I…LOVE…YOU, and I couldn't get them out. I stood there and stared at her beautiful face pleading for me to admit what she could tell I wanted to say. I saw it in her eyes…she shared my feelings too…we were on the same page in that moment, we were both feeling the same things and this was my big chance and I just froze! FUCK! What the fuck is wrong with me?

And now…now she was going to go on the date with that mother fucking player and I can't do a damn thing about it. I know Bella. If I just would have said it she would have cancelled the damn date and been honest with the guy that she had feelings for someone else and she didn't want to lead him on. That was just Bella for you.

Instead of going out with him, I could have asked her to go out with me and I would have gotten to spend an amazing night enjoying my Bella's company, but no…I fucking froze. I was so distracted by the basic physical attraction I had for her that I lost my whole focus for being there and panicked.

As she stood there her whole body wound tightly as stood face to face with me, inches apart, and all I could think about was what it would feel like to hold her in my arms and kiss the living shit out of her. I daydreamed for a moment of her reaction if I just reached out and fucking pulled her into my arms, crashing my lips to hers and instantly parting them to caress her tongue with my own. She would probably stand stiff at first in surprise, but as the passion mounted between us and my tongue would tease her mouth she would reach up those beautiful little hands and wrap them in my hair scratching my scalp with her nails and when we would part she would sigh a little flooding my face and mouth with her beautiful warm breath and look up at me with those deep brown eyes and I would see her feelings for me reflected there.

Then I pulled myself out of my daydream and remembered what we were talking about, what she was calling me out on…I knew she was right and it made me feel a bit sick, but at the same time, so much had changed for me in the last month. I wanted to tell her how I felt, to tell her that now I understood my feelings for her – the ones that I never understood in the past, that for years I felt an ache for her and I mistook it for something entirely different. How the hell do you tell someone that most of your life you had a black hole in the middle of your soul that ate away at your faith in people and especially in love? How do I tell her that being in her presence over the past seven years made it shift and tug within my chest, expanding and contracting in direct correlation to my relationship with her, but admitting I love her and thinking for even the slightest of moments that my love might be reciprocated, it fills in immediately? You can't…you'd sound like a fucking lunatic to admit something like that to someone. So I panicked and I just couldn't tell her. I know it's true, I love her, and I love her more than anything…so why couldn't I just have told her even just the most basic truth? Because I'm a fucking emotional invalid…that's why! Ugh…someone just kill me now!

BPOV

I woke up the next morning with puffy eyes and a headache. I dressed for work and stopped by Starbucks on my way to the hospital for my daily caffeine fix to aid in facing the day ahead of me. Work was pretty typical and I rushed out of the hospital as soon as I could to shower and dress for my date.

I wanted to say I was more excited for the date, but honestly I couldn't help but wish I were meeting Edward instead of Trevor. I know I'd have to get over it but I just couldn't seem to shake the idea of being with Edward like that…to get dressed up and go out on the town on his arm, laughing at his jokes and stories. We would sit at a table for two in the corner of some dark little bistro and get lost in our own little Edward/Bella world. It would be so easy and natural…a far cry from the night I faced which almost certainly would end up being awkward and tricky.

I sighed and looked at my reflection in the mirror before I began blow drying my hair. I wish I could just stay home and curl up in my bed with a good book and mope over the events of the night before, instead of forcing myself to go on a date with someone new. I threw on a light dash of make up before returning to my room to decide what to wear. I already knew I wasn't going to dress up like I did on girl's night. If this guy was going to like me, then I wanted him to like the real me, not the fake overly girly me that he bumped into at Dooley's.

Okay, well, I wasn't going to be totally myself because then I would show up in comfy jeans and a t-shirt with my red converse, my hair tucked in a ponytail and that just wasn't adequate for an actual date…so instead I opted for a pair of black skinny jeans paired with my emerald green satin wrap top. I wore my favorite black leather blazer and a pair of black ballet flats. It was more me than the dress the other night, but classy enough for a date.

I took a quick spin in front of the mirror to make sure I looked alright. My hair was down and straight, my outfit didn't flaunt too much of my form, but it didn't hide it either; thus giving off the appropriate vibe for a first date, and my makeup looked fairly decent considering I was the one who did the applying. Nodding in approval with a sigh, trying to prepare myself for the night ahead of me, I grabbed my purse from my nightstand and opened and walked down the hallway to find that the boys invaded our living room and were debating over which song to do next on Rock Band.

I walked through on my way to the front door saying 'hi' as I passed only to hear a wolf whistle from the couch. I turned around to see the guys all smiling up at me including Andy, who was sitting on the couch with his legs propped up and a big smile on his face.

"Andy! Nobody told me that they released you!" I cried. I ran across the room to hug him tightly. "I'm sorry I didn't make it up to see you the past couple of days. I was having a weird week."

"Oh it's okay. Look at you beautiful! Where are you headed looking all dressed up and pretty!" He was beaming up at me obviously knowing the whole story but feigning ignorance.

"Please, I'm quite sure you've heard from these old biddies that I have a date tonight." I glanced up to roll my eyes at the guys only to lock eyes with Edward who was sitting in the corner watching me with a sad look in his eyes. I nodded toward him before turning back to Andy. "Speaking of which, I'm meeting him in front of the hospital at seven and I'm going to be late if I don't leave right now."

Andy frowned, "What? He's not even enough of a gentleman to pick you up?"

I laughed, "Oh no, he offered…I just knew better than to let him within fifty feet of you guys, so I suggested meeting there. Besides, I don't know the guy well enough to trust him with my address yet." I winked at Andy who winked back and smiled.

"That's our smart girl," he drawled before squeezing my hand. "Now get out of here before we make you late."

I smiled, waved saying my goodbyes and stepped out of the door and made my way down to the street to walk toward the hospital, taking my time to steel my nerves along the way.

As I neared the front entrance of the hospital I saw him leaning against the wall in the same place he had been yesterday when he asked me out. His knee bent and his right foot once again propped against the wall behind him. To say he looked hot would be an understatement as he stood there in a pair of dark black jeans, a tight fitting white silk button down shirt, with the top three buttons open to show the top of his sculpted chest, and a black leather trench coat. He smiled when he saw me and his dark brown eyes seemed to smolder as he pushed off the wall and strode forward to meet me on the sidewalk.

"You look fantastic Bella," he intimated as his eyes traveled up and down the front of my body. I did take notice that his gaze didn't linger too long in any particular place, pleasing me with his gentlemanly actions already this evening. Surely the player Edward keeps claiming him to be wouldn't act so respectfully.

"Thanks," I replied, blushing a bit as my gaze fell to the sidewalk in front of me before I forced myself to look back up at him through my eyelashes. "You look really nice too."

We stood in an awkward silence for a few moments before he spoke up. "Well, our reservations are for seven thirty, so we should probably head that way," he said offering his arm to me. I reached my right hand out and placed it on his arm with a smile. "Well Miss Chicago expert, why don't you direct this newbie in the right direction." I smiled and turned the right direction tugging his arm slightly to guide him slowly down the street toward Benihana.

We engaged in small talk as we made our way to the restaurant. Things weren't quite as easy for me as they were with the rest of the Femmes or my boys, but they weren't too terribly awkward either. My biggest issue was dealing with my humiliating blush every few minutes.

We entered the restaurant ten minutes early and stood in the entryway talking while we waited for our place at one of the grill tables where a chef would be cooking our meal in front of us. Soon we were led to the back of the room, we were seated at a table and then our chef arrived to cook for us. Anytime I had come in the past, we either had enough people to fill a whole table, or we were seated with strangers, but tonight we were seated alone, which instantly made me concerned as to how much money he had spent to reserve us a private table. I really didn't like the idea of him spending so much, but at the same time, it was kind of nice to be able to get to know each other without people around to hear our conversations.

We laughed and watched in awe as the chef expertly chopped the meal while flipping his knives and even catching the shrimp tails in the top of his chef's hat, but all too soon the entertaining distraction was finished and we were left to eat and try to carry on a conversation. It started off a bit awkward, mainly because I was feeling so stinking self conscious, but thankfully I eventually snapped myself out of it and said 'screw it, I'm going to be myself and if he doesn't like me then tough shit'. Suddenly things became much more relaxed.

"So, I just don't get the concept of chopsticks," I finally said shaking my hand that had cramped up as I tried to pick up a slippery vegetable. "I mean it's all well and good when you're eating big things like a nice jumbo shrimp, but the rest of it is ridiculous…and don't even get me started on trying to eat rice with the darn things."

Trevor laughed, "Well you're supposed to scoop it up like this." He reached over to my rice to demonstrate the technique since had had chosen noodles.

I laughed, "Yeah, but look, you lost half of your rice before you got it to your mouth. It's no wonder the Asian women are so tiny, they get a full work out just trying to get the damn food to their mouths."

He threw his head back with a hearty laugh; I chuckled, chewing on my lip a little in shy appreciation of how handsome he was when he really smiled. This was the third time since I loosened up that I managed to see this smile, it was so much better than his handsome seductive smile that he usually threw around.

"So, Bella, explain to me how it is that a pretty, funny, smart as hell girl like you is still single," Trevor asked out of the blue as he picked his beer up to his mouth for a long drink.

"Hmm…well there are a couple of reasons. First of all, I am a very ambitious person, having dedicated the last six and a half years of my life to getting my medical degree and now I'm up to my waist in my intern year, so I haven't had much time to date. Secondly, of the few times that I have managed to date, my brother and his friends have done a very thorough job of scaring off my suitors. I kept my last boyfriend a secret from them for a year and a half until I broke things off because I found out that he wasn't exactly faithful. I can put up with a lot of things, but infidelity is not one of them."

I looked over to see him shift uncomfortably in his seat and gaze down at his food with great interest, too much interest. When he looked up he had a sad look in his eyes. "I've been there. It's not a good place to be." With that he looked back down at his spicy looking dish and began to eat again with renewed focus.

I reached a hand out to touch is forearm in comfort when I heard a laugh that sounded familiar. I looked toward the sound, but didn't see anybody I knew. My gaze snapped back to Trevor when I felt his hand cover mine that was now perched on his forearm. He looked over at me with an odd expression as he squeezed my hand in appreciation before sighing and lifting my hand to his lips. He kissed the back of it softly and then placed it back on the table between us as he turned toward me.

"You're a really sweet girl Bella. Thank you."

"Broken hearts have to stick together right?"

He smiled and I smiled back, ready to change the subject when I heard the laugh again and looked back toward the direction it had originated from.

"What is it Bella?" Trevor asked with concern marring his face.

"I keep hearing a laugh that sounds just like Alice's, but she's supposed to be at a family function tonight, so it can't be her." I shook my head and looked back to Trevor. "Sorry, it's just bugging me."

He chuckled and then changed the subject. "How do you like your Teriyaki Steak?"

"MMMM, it's really good. Would you like a taste?" I used my chopsticks to pick up a piece of sauce covered steak and gestured toward him offering to place it on his plate. He nodded and smiled but instead of letting me put it on his plate he leaned forward and ate it from my chopsticks with his mouth and moaned in pleasure. I sat there for a moment with my mouth agape in shock. Even in the year and a half Damon and I spent together, he had never eaten off of my silverware. I was trying to figure out if I was grossed out by his act of familiarity or excited by it.

"Mmmm, that IS good," he intimated excitedly. "Here, try a bite of mine." He picked up a piece of his Seafood Diablo, reaching his chopsticks toward my mouth for me to reciprocate his act of intimacy.

I faltered and flushed nervously, "Uh, I don't know. I'm sort of a wimp when it comes to spicy stuff."

"Oh come on, it's not that bad. Just try a bite." He smiled that genuine smile at me and I just couldn't resist. I leaned forward and carefully pulled the sauce covered seafood from his chopsticks. I watched him through my eyelashes and began to chew.

I think my jaws had only contracted three maybe four times before the fire took over my senses and I felt my eyes grow wide just as they began to water. I quickly reached for my napkin where I spit out the burn inducing food and instantly guzzled my soda. It dulled the burn but still had not sated the heat. I could hear his laughter in the background. In my desperation to put out the fire, reached over and grabbed his beer since there were no alternatives at the table and my body would not survive until the server could bring me a refill. I tipped back the glass, guzzling nearly the entire thing before finally feeling that the burn had dimmed nearly completely. I looked over at Trevor apologetically.

His face was red as he bent over grabbing his stomach in laugher. I rolled my eyes. "I TOLD you I had issues with spicy. Holy crap…that was like a five alarm fire in my mouth!"

He chuckled some more before gesturing to the waitress for more drinks. "Remind me to never take you for Indian then. This is nothing compared to Indian food!"

I smiled at him ruefully and then I heard the laugh again. I looked up just in time to see Alice crossing toward the restroom. "I thought that was her," I mumbled before yelling 'Alice' across the room. She looked over with a big smile and made her way over to our table.

"Bella! I forgot you were going to be here tonight! Hi Trevor." I noticed that she was less enthusiastic as she greeted Trevor.

"What are you doing here Alice?" I asked her a little suspicious of my pixie friend.

"Well, I told you I had a family function silly. I'm here with my parents. Hey, would you like to come meet them? Can you let me borrow your date for a few minutes Trevor? I'd really like to introduce her while we're all here and then I'll bring her right back to you."

He nodded and smiled as Alice pulled me quickly around the corner toward the restroom. "I really need a pit stop first," she said with a smile as we entered the restroom. She rushed into a stall and then came out smiling as she washed her hands and checked her hair and makeup in the mirror.

"So Bella, how is the date going? You two looked quite cozy." She had a smile on her face, but I couldn't help noticing that wasn't entirely genuine.

"It's fine. He's a nice guy and we've been laughing a lot tonight. I think I'll probably go out again with him if he asks."

She nodded with a far off look in her eyes before she turned to me smiling. "Okay, you have to come and meet Mr. and Mrs. Brandon! Come on!"

She dragged me to a table where a large group was gathered around the grill table and she introduced me to each person. Mr. and Mrs. Brandon actually seemed pretty down to earth considering their elevated place in society. Mr. Brandon owned Brandon pharmaceuticals and the family was loaded…so loaded that they actually lived in a penthouse in the Hancock building. Both of her parents looked at me with bright interested eyes and genuine smiles when Alice told them all about our place with the Femmes and our newly cemented friendship. They politely invited me over to dinner sometime before Alice gave me a quick hug with a wish for a good rest of the night before I returned to the table.

I was grateful that Trevor didn't seem upset with me for bailing on him for so long. In my absence our drink refills had arrived so I sat down taking a long drink before taking another bite of food and shyly resuming the conversation.

Twenty minutes later we had finished our food and sat talking and laughing together. When I looked down at my watch I was shocked to find that it was already 8:30. I looked up at Trevor apologetically. "I'm sorry, I know I promised we could do a tour, but it's awfully late already. Would it be okay if we just maybe went to Dooley's for a quick drink and then called it a night instead?"

He looked over pouting a second before smiling at me teasingly, "Only if you promise to give me a rain check on that tour. I really need to be shown the ropes by someone who knows a bit more of the city outside of the hospital and Michigan Avenue."

I laughed and reached my hand out to shake his, "Deal!" I chirped. He reached forward and took my hand in his, but instead of shaking it he just held it ran his thumb over the back of it a couple of times as he looked into my eyes sending a chill of excitement down my back.

He quickly paid and then to my surprise reached out and took my hand, holding it as we walked toward Dooley's. Just before we reached Dooley's I thought I recognized the back of a head about a half a block behind us and Trevor opened the door for me. I had to step inside before they got close enough for me to get a good look.

It was a slow quiet night in the bar, which was unusual. I was a little worried that the bad economy might be hitting my dear Mama D a little harder these days and I hoped that she would fare the lull well. Trevor started to head toward a booth in the back, but I tugged on his hand shaking my head.

"I want you to meet somebody," I said with a smile, pulling him to a bar stool and directing him to sit as I hopped up on the one next to him. Within seconds a wide smiling Mama D was standing in front of me leaning on the bar.

"Hi Mama D! How's it hangin'?"

"Low and Slow sugar, low and slow. I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but I need to come up with something to bring the crowds in on these weeknights. The weekends are still going great, but the weeknights are really getting bad. But never you mind about that chickadee, I want to know who this hot little number is that you brought in here."

"Mama D, this is Trevor Sellers, he's one of the new docs over at the hospital. I actually met him the other night when the Femmes during our girl's night out. Trevor, this amazing lady is Ms. Delia Dooley, better known as Mama D, my neighbor and the proprietor of this lovely establishment."

Mama wiped her hand behind the counter on a towel and reached her hand out to shake with Trevor. Trevor smiled back and shook her hand enthusiastically before reaching over to take my hand that was laying on the bar resulting in Mama's eyes widening just moments before her smile grew even larger.

"Well, well, well. So would this be a date?"

I nodded and she smiled, "Well fantastic. What can I get for you kids?"

"I'll have a rum and coke, but I have an early day tomorrow, so please don't let me have more than two alright?' She nodded. Trevor ordered a Guiness and we sat at the bar making a bit more small talk. I glanced over Trevor's shoulder toward the windows that looked out onto the street in time to see a shock of bronze hair facing toward the window for a few second and then dash off down the street.

EPOV

I sat in the apartment with the guys pretending to play Rock Band when Bella came gliding out of her bedroom and down the hallway. My heart was pounding in my chest as I watched her, the shiny green satin shirt looked amazing, it hugged her curves and hinted at her figure underneath the black leather blazer which made her look sexy as hell. She was dressed up but still clearly being totally Bella and I forced myself to swallow the saliva collecting in my mouth past the lump in my throat.

My heart squeezed tighter and tighter in my chest as I listened to her banter back and forth with Andy about her date, which she seemed completely excited about. If I weren't a guy sitting in a room of other guys I probably would have been crying. The thought of her on a date with someone else, any one else, made my heart sick and my stomach boil in protest, but the thought of her out with that player made me want to pull a Linda Blair on the entire fucking room.

She looked up at me and her eyes darkened for a moment before she left the apartment. The second the door closed the guys kicked into gear clearing away the drums and guitars. Emmett and Joey disappeared out of the doorway while Andy and Jasper kept me company in the apartment.

Andy kept drilling me with questions. He had been so stoked when he found out I finally got my head out of my ass, only to be extra pissed when he found out I blew my chance to tell her how I felt the night before.

"You stupid fucker," he yelled at me. "For a practically fearless cop you sure are a pussy when it comes to that girl."

"I know," I whispered looking down at my hands as I slowly tore a paper towel into narrow strips.

"What are you going to do about it?"

"Fuck Andy, I don't know. I used to think I had all of the answers, had everything I ever wanted or could get it if I wanted it…but with Bella I'm totally lost. I just don't know what to do, what to say, how to act. I'm just totally fucking clueless."

He chuckled darkly from his space across the room on the couch. "Well, at least you're heading in the right direction." I looked up at him in confusion. "Bella isn't something you want to acquire. She's not a thing, she's not a cheap one night roll in the hay, and she certainly isn't one of the brainless airheads that you normally land. You're going to have to really put yourself out there, risk everything, and maybe, if you're lucky, you'll end up getting the honor of being with the best fucking person you have ever met. It will mean risking rejection, but the reward is definitely worth the risk!"

I sighed and melted into the chair. I already knew everything he said, but his generalizations weren't going to help me figure this out. I needed some specifics. I needed a fucking 'The Idiot's Guide to Winning Bella Swan's Heart'. I was about to open my mouth say as much when Jasper's phone chirped on his hip and he pulled it out with a smile.

"Phase one is in effect. Alice convinced her parents to go to Benihana for supper and she can see Bella and the dickweed from her table. She said that things look a bit awkward between them right now."

I smiled and crossed my fingers. My best hope would be that this would be one of those awkward horrific first dates, the kind that you reserve for story telling during boring nights at the bar to pass the time and the player would be out of the picture and I could focus on simply winning Bella's heart instead of having to stress over her getting hurt or worse, her actually changing him like she has already changed me. The thought of the two of them falling in love made my heart skip and stutter in my chest.

Of course my luck couldn't hold out. Ever since I realized the feelings I had for Bella, my luck had turned to shit. The text messages kept getting worse and worse. They had broken the ice and were actually laughing together, not only that but Alice was nervous because Trevor had begun slipping into a more comfortable mode as well. His laugh seemed genuine and fuck me he was starting to see just how amazing my Bella was.

Alice stepped up and started openly working on interference when she noticed a seemingly serious conversation and Bella reaching out to place a comforting hand on Trevor's arm. Then they stepped it up even more once they started feeding each other bites of their food from their chopsticks. That shit really freaked me out…Bella was a bit psychotic about sharing silverware. She wouldn't even share with Emmett who is her biological brother for crying out loud and here she was eating off a man's chopsticks, someone who is practically a stranger and carries lord only knows what diseases. What. The. Fuck?

I was on the verge of hyperventilation and seconds from storming straight over there when we got a text from Alice that she made her presence known and even managed to pull Bella into the bathroom for some gossip and then took her to meet Alice's parents. She said that Bella suggested that if he offered a second date she would accept and I couldn't handle it anymore. I threw on my coat and walked out of the apartment and down the street, going nowhere in particular. I just knew I needed an escape. I needed air.

The texts began to come directly to my phone from Emmett and Joey when they left the bar next to Benihana's. They had been camped in waiting for the date to continue on for the rest of the evening. They were tailing the couple, staying about half a block back and trying to keep to the more shadowed areas as much as possible. They shocked me by saying that the duo had gone into Dooley's.

I kept walking aimlessly, somehow ending up standing in front of the big plate glass window of Dooley's. I'm not sure if it was morbid curiosity or outright masochism, but I had to see for myself. I had to see what was going on between them, to see if Bella was enjoying herself, to see if she was bringing out a side of him that could treat her as well as she deserved to be treated.

I stood frozen for at least five minutes as I watched them interact with Mama D. Mama happily shook Trevor's hand and beamed at Bella, glowing even more when Trevor reached over to hold my love's hand that was lying on the bar. I kicked myself for being a total girl when I felt the tear collect in the corner of my eye. I was being a sissy little bitch and I knew it, but knowing it didn't help dull the pain.

Then I saw her look up and a flash of annoyance filled her face so I took off for the alley to hide. I leaned against the wall, wiping away the tears that were wetting my cheeks before grasping the bridge of my nose, willing my involuntary tear duct seepage to stop. That's when I heard it, the voice that made my heart speed up and filled my chest with the dull warmth of hope.

"Edward Anthony Masen, what the hell are you doing here?! Are you spying on me?"

"N..no…not really…I mean. Ugh!" I sighed as I struggled for a cover story, lying my face off. "I came down here to get a drink. You weren't supposed to be here, remember? You two were doing dinner and tour of the city or something like that. You never said you were coming to Dooley's. Anyway, I went to walk in the door and I saw you sitting at the bar with him talking to Mama D. I stopped and then I saw him reach over and take your hand and I froze. I didn't like it."

"Why Edward? I have watched you do a whole hell of a lot more with women than hold their hands in my presence …so why would you have issue with me holding Trevor's hand. At least I wasn't grabbing his ass or chest in front of a room full of people or anything." My stomach clenched and I felt like I was going to be sick all over again.

"Fuck, I know that, I understand the hypocrisy, but I just can't stand to see you already starting down a road that is going to get you hurt."

"What the hell is it about Trevor that has you so convinced that I'm going to get hurt?" She moved to stand right in front of me with her hands on her hips. My breathing increased at her proximity as I fought the urge to pull her into a kiss. I was struggling so much with resisting that my next statement flew out of my mouth before I realized I said it.

"Maybe because while the fucker was lucky enough to have you in his arms two nights ago and you were dancing he was asshole enough to be checking out the ass of a blonde dancing next to you."

Her eyes glazed with a hurt and I immediately felt bad for hurting her before it morphed into a dark and rage full anger. "Why would you lie like that? Are you that desperate to keep me single? You're making up stories now?"

"I'm not making it up Bella. Jasper and Emmett saw it too."

"Liar! They never would have let me go out with him if they saw that! They would have told me and chased him off immediately."

I was standing straighter, closing the space between us as I reached forward and grabbed Bella's biceps in my hands. "There wasn't time Bella, and they didn't want to hurt you. He moved to fast to do much in the way of scaring him off either…so they just hoped that you would have a boring date and he would disappear, but obviously that wasn't the case."

She stared at me looking a bit in shock and I just kept going, once I opened the door I couldn't stop. "And to answer your other question, I'm not desperate to keep you single; I'm desperate for the chance to make you MINE! I didn't make it up, and I wouldn't dare because I could never bear to hurt you like that if it weren't the truth that you needed to hear because I love you Bella. There! I finally said it; I am in so fucking in love with you that it hurts."

My mind was running a million miles a second as I instantly pulled her to my chest and crashed my lips on hers, praying to the heavens that she would feel the same way, that she would love me back, that she would give me the chance to prove to her that I was the man who deserved her love.

She stood still as a statue in shock for a few seconds before her hands ran up my arms and snaked into my hair, then she began to respond to my kiss. I parted my lips and grazed my tongue against her bottom lip requesting admission and I thought I had literally died and gone to heaven when she granted my request. She tasted so much better than I had remembered. As our tongues danced in her warm mouth before her tongue pushed back and reached into my mouth causing me to moan.

I really wish I hadn't moaned because somehow that broke the spell. Instantly she pulled away with wide eyes before she reached her hand back and slapped my face…hard. My hand reflexively went to my cheek in disbelief; my mouth fell open in shock.

"That was low Edward! Ugh! God! If you really meant what you just said to me, if you really and truly loved me, you would have said it last night when you had the chance instead of saying it as a reaction to seeing someone else hold my fucking hand! I don't want to hear those words escape your mouth because you are jealous. I want you to say them because you fucking mean them, because your heart is so fucking full of love that you HAVE to say it or else explode. Not like this…not in a dirty alley behind Dooley's while I have a date who doesn't deserve me going around acting like a fucking slut kissing another guy while he's waiting inside. NO! Fuck you Edward! GO HOME!"

She had tears running down her face as she spoke and I could taste the bile in the back o f my throat as I forced my throat to close, not wanting to release the contents of my stomach. I am and will always be an ass. She closed her eyes and the pain on her face literally broke me as I fell against the wall and slid down it to the ground as she turned and stomped away. I don't now how long I sat there. I lost count of how many text messages I ignored before Emmett and Joey appeared at the end of the alley and walked over to me pulling me up off the ground and helping me walk home.

"I think I did it Em, I think I lost her forever this time," I moaned as my friends led me toward my apartment.

"What did you do Edward? Bella showed up an hour ago bawling and ran straight to her room. She won't open the door or talk to anybody."

"I told her I was in love with her and kissed her and she slapped me." I told him the rest of the story, of the horrific events I the alley and Emmett groaned and shook his head before he finally laughed.

"Ah man, all's not lost. Hell, what you described was basically foreplay. All that anger just means she cares about you and she was pissed off at HOW you told her, not what you told her. Women are crazy man, you'll figure it out eventually, but for now just trust me that her reaction was preferable to the other option, indifference. If she had been cold and unemotional and just walked away you'd be screwed, but rage…rage is good…rage is just one step away from head over heels in love."

I looked over at him as though he had two heads, but then sighed, hoping he was right. The guys tossed me on the couch and sat with me a while before deciding that maybe it was safe to leave me be. I sat in the dark and stared out my windows at the city lights below and let out a small prayer. I wasn't a praying man, but at this point God was about the only one who would be able to help. Please let Emmett be right. Please let her give me another chance. Please let me make this right.

BPOV

My heart was thumping in my chest as I rubbed my hands hard against my cheeks on my way back into the bar. God I had wanted him to say those words to me so much last night, and every night before that night, but no, he says them as a reaction to seeing Trevor holding my hand which totally ruined it. He didn't say it because he wanted to…he said it because he was scared and panicked. GAH! The ASSHOLE!

I knew I looked like shit when I walked back in the door and walked back over to Trevor.

"I'm sorry Trevor, I need to go."

He looked truly concerned reaching a hand out to rub my bicep comfortingly, the one that Edward just grabbed when he talked to me and confessed his love, and where warmth had recently radiated a strange chill ran there when Trevor touched me. I thought about what Edward said in the alley…was it true? Was Trevor just another player?

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry. It's a private thing to do with the person I saw through the window. We had a fight and well I need to get home and get some sleep anyway. I have to be in at six in the morning."

His brow furrowed while I spoke before he finally sighed and wrapped an arm around my shoulder in a friendly half hug. "Of course, I understand Bella. Thank you for coming out with me tonight. I think that was the best date I've had in, well, maybe ever."

I blushed and looked down feeling incredibly guilty. He's sitting here saying it was the best date ever and I was just in the alleyway getting hot and heavy with the man I've been secretly in love with since I was sixteen. Ugh…I was just as bad as all the guys I ever dated who lied and cheated. I felt like such a slut. I knew I was an awful human being.

"I had a really nice night too Trevor. Thank you very much. I'll see you around okay?"

"Absolutely. Don't forget, you promised me a rain check."

I gave him a weak smile and nod before looking over at Mama D to say goodbye. She looked at me a little concerned and mouthed 'Edward?' I nodded and she grimaced in understanding before waving goodbye.

I rushed out of the bar and down the street, peeking out of the corner of my eye to see that Edward was sitting on the ground against the wall in a ball with his head buried in his hands.

Good, I hope you feel as shitty as I do. I thought to myself. The tears began to flow again so I rushed toward my apartment. By the time I got there I was gasping in my sobs. I ran through the door of the apartment and straight to my room where I slammed the door and locked it. An instant later I heard banging at the door and Emmett's voice through the thin wall.

"Bella, are you okay?….Bella?"

I didn't answer, but my crying got louder.

"Fuck! Did that asshole hurt you? I'll fucking kill that jackass doctor!"

I wailed a bit more before running to the door and yelling through it. "NO, he was a gentleman. If you want to kick someone's ass, go find Edward!" My voice cracked as I screamed at the door.

"Edward?"

"Yes…now please just leave me alone!"

I sobbed for the next hour as I struggled to deal with dozens of emotions: anger at Edward for his timing and the situation in which he finally chose to admit his feeling to me; sadness that he didn't really mean it…not really; excitement at the memory of his warm soft tongue exploring my mouth, his hand roaming my back and sides passionately; guilt at the fact that I returned his kiss with just as much passion, grabbing at his hair and pulling him closer, invading his mouth with my tongue wanting him so badly as the warmth traveled throughout my body in waves all the while my unsuspecting date waited innocently inside for me to return and finally depression that I was no better than every fucker who has broken my heart in the past six years.

I ignored the trail of people who traveled to and from my door, trying to get me to open for a talk and the countless phone calls and text messages that arrived on my cell phone. I think it was close to midnight when I finally cried myself to sleep only to relive our horrendous fight over and over in my restless sleep.

Author's Note: Okay guys, please don't kill me for Bella's reaction to Edward's revelation. There are a few reasons for it…more about her own insecurities and past experiences coming into play than anything. I promise to address it more in the next chapter. I know when even my beta says her reaction was a bit harsh that I'm probably in for a few frustrated comments from you guys, but I promise I'm going somewhere here. Also Thank you to my Beta Sihaya9 for getting this done during a busy weekend, stealing time when she could to read and edit! Thanks for reading and I'm looking forward to hearing your thoughts!