Episode 3: Awaken for the Aftermath! Goodbye Cocoyashi!
Nursing a broken leg was not fun. It hurt, it was a bother and it itched with no way to scratch the spot under the cast. She didn't like it. She hated it. But that was what she got for picking fights with kids bigger than herself. She was strong, stronger than most kids her age, but that didn't help when it was four-on-one. She could complain as much as she wanted but it wouldn't stop it being her own damn fault that she got her teeth kicked in each time.
She hated it.
Her "home", if you can call it that, was not a nice place either. It was a big house, but it was hers. It would be hers and she wouldn't need to even start paying for living there until she turned eighteen. And it was so... empty. She hated that, too. It was such a big place for such a little girl.
And most of all, it was not a nice place to leave, but neither was it a nice place to come back to. Because no matter how many times she exited or entered the door, there wouldn't be a Papa to bid her a safe trip, or a Mama to welcome her back home. No one to comfort her when she broke something and it hurt and she wanted to do nothing but cry.
There never had been. She hated it.
She was only six years old and she had a house to her name. It was weird, unnatural. Other kids found it weird that she was living all alone. That is, when they weren't making fun of her for having no mom and no dad. For having weirdly red-hair and those eerie blue eyes or her weird and unusual name. Those who picked on her she'd beat up. Those who didn't pick on her avoided her like the plague. And those who had the nerve to approach her without ill intent were always driven off when they inevitably said the wrong thing as she reacted badly.
She hated it.
She hated living in that big, dumb, empty house. She hated entering and leaving that big, stupid, empty house. She hated not having a stupid Mom or a stupid Dad! She hated the other FUCKING stupid kids, all of them!
But most of all... she hated _#_ &*%x$_.
And it made her angry...
... So... Angry...
Consciousness comes to me in a form I can put into words. It was like a day after your ex-girlfriend dumps you and you drink yourself miserable out of spite, then wake up knowing you've made a huge mistake and probably did something super harmful to your body while under the influence.
Overall, I think my body has been to hell and back while I was out. I can't help but to wonder what the fuck happened. The last thing I remember... it's super fuzzy. Something, something Arlong Park... Something, something Luffy...
...
"OH SHI- ooooooooww!" I jump into a sitting position, fully awake now and boy, do I immediately regret my decision and force my ass back down. Holy fuck, my everything! It feels like I was hit be a train, twice, and then got cut by some back-alley asshole after my liver. Only that back-alley asshole had a shitty knife and an unsteady hand.
I wince in pain, but tough it out. I can live with pain. Pain means you're not dead, so that means... we won, right? Me being alive clearly contradicts how badly Arlong wanted to murder our faces, right?
I look around and immediately think, 'Hospital... fuck.'. I also take time to spot a very soundly sleeping Zoro in one of the other beds, bandaged up.
"Ah, seems you're awake." I turn to see an old man enter the room we're in. I recognize him as the doctor from Cocoyashi. "How are you feeling."
"Like my everything got run over by a boat." I say flatly, my voice a little dry. "What's the actual damage, or do I need to gander an educated guess?"
"Are you a doctor?" I shake my head. "Then it's not a very educated guess, is it?"
"Hardy har." I 'laugh'. "Just tell it to me straight. I'm a big girl. I can take it."
"You had seven broken ribs, your backbone was bruised, the bones in your right arm had broken in numerous spots, some minor internal bleeding and you got a concussion. You also have three deep cuts in your right side and arm, but those should heal up just fine." He said in one breath.
I blink dumbly at him. "Well... that's a lot more than I expected. I think it's a new record." I wonder out loud. "... Wait, cut? When was I cut?"
He raised an eyebrow. "You don't remember?"
"No, I remember but refuse to tell you because I don't take stock in the grumpy old doctor grandpa." I snark at him, showing I am indeed all good as far as my head goes. "Of course I can't. What's up with that?"
"... In my professional opinion, I think it's better if your friends explain that to you." He said and moved to leave the room.
"Oh, I see..." I say absentmindedly. "Wait, my what?"
The old doctor was gone, but it didn't take long for some other people to arrive. The first one was very loud.
"Megalon!" Luffy yelled as he rushed into the room. He looked worried for some reason. "You alive?"
"No. Super dead." I said, picking my ear with my pinky finger. Fuck, that guy is loud.
"What?! You're dead?" He exclaims as his eyes bug out in shock.
"OF COURSE NOT, MORON!" I yell at him and immediately have regrets. Fuck my head hurts. I fall completely limp on the hospital bed. "...eeeurgh."
"Good to see you're okay, Megalon-san!" Sanji says as he enters after Luffy, being much more quiet and considerate. Then again, comparing the two is seriously unfair. "Do you need anything? A kiss to reinvigorate your spirits, perhaps?"
... Typical Sanji.
"Yeah, no." I state flatly. "Though, I do have to question why I feel like absolute shit. Apparently you are the guys to ask."
"I dunno." Luffy says instantly.
"Of course you don't, you weren't there to see when it happened." Sanji remarks and looks at me. His face is serious. Huh. "What do you recall?"
"Absolutely nothing after something about Luffy, the sea and... Arlong." I answer vaguely. "It's really unclear and fuzzy. I remember being mega angry. Like, more than usual."
Sanji takes a deep breath, lights a cigarette and takes a breath of that.
"Isn't smoking not allowed near people in hospitals?" I can't help but to ask.
"Do you care?" He asks.
"Fair point." I concede.
Sanji takes a moment, seemingly trying to find the best way to say what he wants to say. "Well, I'll just say it outright, since I think you're capable of taking it. You transformed."
"How the fuck does that explain why I'm so fucked up? I mean, I am a massive target, but even I'm not stupid enough to go full Megalodon while on land." I can't help but wonder.
"... Not that one." Sanji frowns. "You went hybrid."
"..." I stare at him, eyes wide, wondering if he's bullshitting me. "I what."
"You heard Arlong laugh at how he attempted to turn Luffy into food for the fish, and then you transformed into your hybrid form." He says levelly and- oh my God he isn't bullshitting me!
"What?! But how? I don't even know how to do that yet! I've tried but I've never done it before." I say, but shake my head. Skepticism for later. "Okay, what happened?"
Sanji glanced at Luffy, standing there obliviously. "Well, Luffy doesn't know yet, so might as well do two birds with one stone." He looked back to me, his eyes dead serious. "You went on a rampage."
... What.
"When you transformed you were not like yourself at all. I could literally see all the intelligence from your eyes vanishing. You beat one of Arlong's men, brutally, even while he was already down." Sanji elaborates.
"... Ah." I manage to say. "But what about-"
"I was getting to that." Sanji cut me off. "What you became... it was honestly a little terrifying. One of the villagers screamed, and you took notice."
My eyes widen in horror. "Please, tell me I didn't-"
"You didn't." Sanji assured me. I let out a subtle sigh of relief. "But you had to be stopped from trying. The Marimo took care of that."
Ah, that explains the cuts... wait a moment. "I was cut by Zoro? And I'm still alive?!"
Sanji looked annoyed and just a bit miffed. "I didn't like how he did it either, but before he snoozed off he said that it was necessary to stop you"
"... What technique?" I had to know.
"Something called "Three Thousand Worlds", or something." Sanji said. "The one he tried against that Mihawk guy."
"... HOW BADASS WAS I TO WARRANT THAT?!" I scream and have to hold my head to stop the thumping. But seriously, that is Zoro's ultimate Santoryu technique, and he required it to stop me! How the fuck am I still alive?!
"Well... you were pretty big." Sanji says, seemingly unable to find anything else to say.
"You saw me as a shark. Was it that big?" I asked.
"Not even close." He said. "But still pretty damn big. About five, six meters."
"Hot damn!" I let out whistle. "That's big, but small enough to be actually usable. I'm like a miniature giant." I try to picture it in my mind. I come out empty. Damn terrible imagination!
But then I get a bit worried. Sanji notices.
"Something wrong?"
"Yeah, you could say that." I say. "I just wondered if I even want to use it again, if I can do it again that is. I mean, if I flew that off the handle this time..." I can't imagine what I could do then.
Luffy, I just noticed, had been surprisingly quiet. Until then.
"That's so dumb, Megalon!" He says with a cheery grin. "Nobody got hurt, right? So it's all good." Well, nobody we gave a shit about, anyway.
"Say that again if and/or when I transform again and try to pound your stretchy ass to the ground." I growl at him, but mean nothing by it. No matter how annoying and moronic Luffy is, I don't want him to die, especially by my hand.
"Nah, that's okay. I'll just beat you up until you snap out of it." He says, and I wonder how he does it while sounding like it's true fact.
I allow myself to laugh. "Samememe- huh?" I stop. That laugh. "Hmm, that was weird. My laugh just came out like that. It's... kinda familiar, somehow."
"You started laughing like that just before you started to go berserk." Sanji told me. "Guess it left some sort of imprint on your mind, or something."
... Holy shit, I have my very own One Piece laugh. That is... actually very cool!
I allow myself to grin. "Samememe! I suppose I came out of this with something that won't try to beat my confidence to the ground or demoralize me. Though that is pretty much impossible!"
"Shishishi!" Luffy laughs as well. "That's the spirit, Megalon!"
I pump my right arm as a sign of agreement, but then I realize it's my right arm and FUCK it still smarts! That fucker cut right into the muscle! Thanks a lot, Zoro! I wince and relax it back to my side.
"I am so glad I'm a Zoan." I say, mostly to myself. "We're tough sons of bitches and we heal faster than you lot, so I should be up and at 'em before too long." That, and I am too stubborn to be confined by a mere hospital bed.
"When you get better there's going to be a party the village is throwing." Sanji says. "They are gonna celebrate Arlong's defeat and we are sort of the guests of honor."
"Ah, so you beat the fish-bastard." I say, giving Luffy a thumbs up. "Nice job!" He just laughs with a smile. "You guys should go do whatever. I'll catch up after a nap." I tell them.
"Sure thing. Don't do anything too stupid." Sanji order jokingly.
"Die in a fire." I needle him in return with a grin.
"Bye, Megalon! Let's hang out during the party!" Luffy says and waves at me.
"Wouldn't miss it!" I say, and then they go off somewhere to do whatever. I relax, close my eyes and do just what I promised. Sleep is the best medicine. Nap time!
... Friends...?
I was up the moment I woke up, going against the doctors orders to let my wounds heal in peace. I had only one thing to say to that. Zoan, motherfucker! Faster than standard healing for the win!
I wasn't the only one either. Zoro woke up too, more or less right that the same time as I did.
Which lead to us having a stare-off. His glare against mine. I have to give it to him, his glare game is fucking amazing. But me? Glaring was ingrained into my soul. Still, props to him.
"Hi." I greet him plainly.
"Hello." He greets tersely.
"Grandwhite Megalon." I introduced myself, last name first as was proper.
"Roronoa Zoro." He did the same.
Oh, goody. We have a connection.
"You cut me." I stated matter-of-factly.
"I did." He answers in kind.
"Dick." I insult him in a passive tone. "Thank you."
"No problem." He says. Welp, glad that's over with!
"I'm gonna head out."
"Same."
"You didn't see me leave and I didn't see you." I say and turn to leave.
"See who?" He says and turns to leave.
Our head bump together as we both try to leave through the same window. Our glaring continues, now with 20% more fire and brimstone.
"Are you copying my style?" I say with narrowed eyes. Irritation levels, rising.
"What the hell are you talking about? It's you who's clearly copying me." I snarled at me with a fearsome glare that might have unsettled anyone not me.
"Oh, that so? What, you afraid to be beaten at being you by a girl?" I say with a malevolent snicker. "Man up and get away from MY window!"
"Eeh? YOUR window? It's clearly mine!" He says with a challenging undertone I recognize.
"You fucking cut me!" I spat at him, our noses practically touching at this point as we glared at each other.
"Because you were going crazy!" He snapped back. "I thought you were thankful for it!"
I took pause and smiled sweetly. He winced and paled at the sudden change. "Why, I am thankful!" Then he gasps for air and grimaces as I punch him hard, right in the gut. "Doesn't mean I forgive you, Moss Head!"
What I get in return, other than utter satisfaction, is a hit to the jaw. I flinch back half a step. Fuck, Zoro has a strong uppercut! "What the hell is your problem?! You want to fight?"
"MY problem?! Oh, that's it!" I yell and swing at him.
What followed was me and Zoro beating the shit out of each other until our bruises had bruises. Zoro was maybe the toughest bastard I've ever fought up until now, but I was not going absolutely seriously. I can tell he wasn't aiming to kill me either, so I restrained myself. And, you know, injuries and all.
But I still put up a hell of a fight. It took about eleven minutes for both of us to be covered in sweat, lying on the floor and covered in bruises. This was... not a new experience to me, not exactly. But...
I felt amazing!
"Samememe..." I laugh while panting. "You are... pretty tough."
"Yeah..." He says, panting as well. "You too..."
"I think my wounds... opened up, like... three minutes ago." I note.
"Same... four minutes." He says.
"Samememe... Pussy. Lasted longer than you." I laugh.
"You have a... a Devil Fruit. That doesn't count."
"... Yeah, okay. You win this time..." I grin. "Then again... my injuries aren't nearly as bad as yours."
"Not even close." Zoro grins.
"The doc is going to be so mad when he sees us." I grin back.
"Yeah." He agrees.
"Wanna bounce out of here before he comes around and chews our ears out?"
"Sure."
The doctor caught us just about to jump out the window and boy, was he livid. He asked what the hell happened. "Nothing," we said in unison. He clearly didn't buy it and restrained us. I don't know how, but for some reason that old fart pulled off an herculean feat by dragging our asses back to bed and changing our bandages while we fought back with tooth and nail.
Never underestimate a pissed off person of medicine, is all I have to say.
Anyway, that's how Zoro and I first properly met.
We snuck out for real at the first moment the doc turned his back. We heard his screams grow fainter as we strutted out of there.
We met up with Luffy and the rest later.
I felt great.
The party at Cocoyashi was awesome!
Aside from getting yelled at by the doctor Zoro and I ditched(and not killing him, if that was even a possibility), everything went pretty great, some tension not withstanding. Some people were still a bit wary of me because of... whatever I tried to do when I was going a bit loco.
I think over time I won them over by having a great time.
Luffy and I got into an eating contest, with people staring with morbid fascination/horror. Luffy, because he ate so much he bloated to grotesque proportions. Me, because despite eating just as much and fast as Luffy, I just remained so horrifyingly normal. It was like any food just up and vanished into some endless abyss the moment I swallowed it.
I blame Devil Fruit bullshit. Sanji seemed resigned to pack a lot of provisions on the ship. He didn't seem happy about it though.
Zoro and I then got into a drinking contest. Drink of the occasion: sake! I'd never tried real sake before, but it was kind of great. I discovered that Zoro and I had amazing tolerances, but when I finally decided to back off and stop, I was pretty blitzed. Not that drunk(yet), but I was really feeling it! And the green-haired fucker dared to seem kinda okay.
I think Usopp was avoiding me... Meh.
Sanji was busy keeping Luffy and Zoro from too much food and sake respectively, lest the village... like, starve or something. Or mutiny due to lack of spirits.
My head feels funny. I just love being drunk and I hate it so much!
Maybe that was why when I spotted distinctively orange hair at the sidelines, for some reason thought to myself, 'Hey, girl! That seems like a good person to bother... DOOO IIIT!'
And then I did it.
I walked(swaying slightly) over to where Nami was, sitting alone and watching everyone. Probably having some down time. And I was going to go ruin it.
"Oiii, Tangerine~!" I say with a slight slurr to my words. She turns to me at the weirdly fitting nickname I called her with.
"Oh, hello..." Right, she don't know me yet, officially.
"Name'sh Megalon." I say with a relaxed, toothy grin and do some kind of weird hybrid between a bow and a curtsy. "I'm Luffy's... Fuck if I knows, samememe! Please'd to meet'cha, Miss Navigator."'
That laugh came so naturally it was almost frightening. Maybe I finally hit my head one too many times?
Then again, why should I care?
"Oh, I'm Nami." She greeted.
"I knows it. Luffy said... something about it on the way." I say. I might have looked puzzled trying to think back to past conversations. "Can't recall... was napping and then there was the shea cow and t'fucking mast..."
The last part came out in a low grumble, but I am sure Nami heard it.
"Umm... Are you drunk?"
"Yes." I say with the most serious face I can manage, in the most serious tone I can manage. That is pretty serious. Then I narrow my eyes dangerously. "S'at a problem?"
"Oh, no, I wouldn't say-" Nami blubbered, flustered and maybe a bit nervous of me. I just laughed at her reaction.
"Samememe! Relax, Tangerine~." I wrap an arm over her shoulders and playfully nudge her with my other. "I'm just playin' you, you dumb shit!" I flash her a smile.
Then I realize she stiffens as she looks at my teeth. I stop smiling and turn my look back to serious.
"Somethin' up with ya?" I ask, quickly adding. "And don't try to say it's nothin'! I ain't no fool, yea?" I let that float in the air for a second.
"Oh, it's n-" I glare at her, not amused. She sighs. "Sorry. Just... your teeth, they-"
"Remind you of Mr. Sawnose McFishdick? Yeas, I figured." I finish for her. I bonk her on the head with my head. Not hard I swear, just a playful gesture. "That's dumb. You're dumb. Being afraid of some dumb dentures. Dumb-dumb..."
... This booze is really starting to get to me. I'm beginning to sound like Luffy. Oh good God...
I think my eyes just went cross-eyed, because Nami laughs. She notices me staring and covers her mouth. "Ah, sorry. Just, with everything that has gone down lately... it feels good to laugh again."
"Samememe." I chuckle. "Laughing is fun. S'long as you don't feel bad about it later, you can laugh all you want. Especially if ya feel justified, damnit!"
"Oh?" Nami questions with a wily smirk. "You know quite a lot of this subject, right? Anything shameful?"
"What's shame?" I ask with mock-confusion. "That some sort of food?"
We stare at each other a bit before we burst out laughing. I think I eased her worries of me somewhat. All in all, a good proper first meeting. I let her go and stand up straight, swaying a bit.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to g'see if Curly Brow has killed Rubber Boy and Moss Head yet." I begin to sway off and wave at Nami over my shoulder with a small toothy grin. "S'ya later, Tangerine~."
Nami smiles and waves back at me as I go enjoy the party some more.
"... uuurgh." I groan. The sun is so fucking bright! Bright sunlight and hangovers do not mix. Fuck the sun!
I was leaning on the railing of the Going Merry(nice to finally see it in person, by the way) and cradling my head to shield myself of the vile rays of brightness.
"What's wrong with you?" Zoro has the gall to asks.
"Fuck off." I snap at him, completely passionless. "You have no right to not be feeling this too, you booze monster."
"Lightweight." He scoffs at me.
I am too done to snap back at him, but fuck you too, Zoro! You drank at least as much as I did! How the fuck are you not feeling this?!
"Here's the water you asked, Megalon-san!" Sanji proclaims, too loud if I was asked but my opinion was hardly unbiased. He was holding a tray with a big pint of water and a larger pitcher filled with the stuff.
"Thanks. Leave the pitcher." I groan and that water disappears into me in a single go. "... Guuuuh, why can't there be an instant fix to hangovers? Some man would make mad money out of that."
We were ready to depart from Cocoyashi and move onto our next destination. I was suffering the aftermath of the party yesterday. Fucking hell, why did something as great as drinking need to be counter-balanced by something so fucking stupid as hangovers?
Everyone was on the deck of Going Merry, even Usopp. Bastard didn't have any more excuse to avoid me anymore, but I was not in the fucking mood right now. Everyone was there, except one individual who had yet to arrive.
"Hey, you sure she's going to show up?" Zoro questions, considering how fucking long we've been waiting already.
"She'd fucking better!" I snap lazily, probably sounding more irritated than I actually was. "I'm going to find and drag her ass here myself if I have to. I didn't go bat shit crazy and get slashed for her to chicken out."
"She'll be here." Luffy said, filled with faith.
"LUFFYYY!" And there is Nami, yelling. About time. "SET SAIL!"
"Hey, what is she doing? She isn't even on yet!" Sanji exclaims, looking over the railing. I don't bother to move from my spot.
Luffy just grins. "You heard her! Let's go!"
Everyone went to prep us for takeoff, except me because fuck if I know what to do. I'm not a fucking sailor. I just swear like one.
I just stood there and watched through my fingers as Nami jumped onto the Merry's rear deck. Then she lifted her shirt and a shit-load of wallets dropped out. Cries of fond outrage came from the citizens of Cocoyashi.
Nami is such a scamp.
"Nice going, Nami." I say with a grin.
She... pouts. "What? I'm no longer Tangerine~?"
I groan extra loudly at the way she practically purred the nickname. "God damnit, I called you that didn't I? I was drunk. That's my excuse. It won't happen again."
"No, no. I don't mind at all." Nami said with a smile. "You can call me whatever you want, Sharpy-chan."
I almost choke on my own spit and scramble in place, hands coming off my face as I stare at Nami in surprise. "W-what?"
"Sharpy. Because you have sharp teeth." She explains. "You can call me whatever you want, but only if I can do the same. Okay?"
...
I let myself shift into a predatory grin. "Samememe! Alright then, Tangerine. I accept these terms."
I said the last part without any purr or weird inflection to it. I do have standards.
And so we, the Straw Hat Pirates, were off to the one, final stop before Grand Line.
Episode 5
Fin~
Next Episode: Landing in Loquetown! Gifts From An Old "Friend"?
¤[!BONUS ALERT!]¤
I was snoozing my ass off in the crow's nest when a loud shout alerted me to the waking world.
"LUFFY! GET OVER HERE! NOW!" Nami shouts at her- our captain.
I grin. His wanted posters came today, eh? Good for him. I tried to drift back into slumber.
"MEGALON, YOU COME HERE TOO!" Sanji shouted suddenly.
I started awake with a jolt, jumping up. "Wait, what- GAAAAH!" I yelled and tripped, managing to throw myself out of the crow's nest and landing face first onto the deck below. "Uuuurgh..."
Thank God for Zoan durability, because that'd have hurt something fierce.
"You okay, Sharpy-chan?" Nami asks me. No concern there, but she knows I'm tough.
"Yeah... Nose is sore, but fuck that." I say and get on my feet. "So, what's the buzz?"
"Look at these!" She held up Luffy and Zoro's wanted posters.
"Straw Hat" Monkey D. Luffy
Bounty: 30 Million Beri
Nothing unusual there. But my eyes are locked onto the second wanted poster. My eyes bugged out.
"See!" Nami cried in misery-fueled anger. "This is super bad for us! There will be marines and bounty hunters on our tail-"
"What the hell is that thing?" I ask, staring at the soullessly blank-eyed, musclebound monstrosity on the wanted poster, roaring at the sky like a bloodthirsty beast.
"Devil Man-Shark" Samehada
Bounty: 50 million Beri
"... What?" Nami said in confusion at my reaction.
"Megalon-san, that's you." Sanji answered. "That's you when you went berserk."
I stare at the picture. My wanted picture. Only...
A vein pops. Then another. And a third, because three's the word, yo.
"WHAT THE HELL?!" I scream bloody murder, making everyone take a step back. "I GET MY OWN GOD DAMN BOUNTY, AND IT'S NOT EVEN FUCKING ADDRESSED TO ME?! INSTEAD THAT DAMN THING GETS ITS OWN DAMN POSTER? IT'S SO UNAPPEALING TOO! WHY THE FUCK DOES MY FORM LOOK SO FUCKING MANLY? WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT?!"
As I continue to rave, curse and scream, everyone does the smart thing and leaves me the fuck alone.
Why does this universe love to fuck with me so much? It better be because I'm a girl, because then at least the universe is able to FUCKING TELL!
A/N: And it was only a day later that she realized "Holy shit, my bounty is bigger than Luffy's... WHY?!". We may never know exactly. FYI, this is almost purely just a gag. It's canon, but it's a gag. Don't take it too seriously. Besides, "Samehada" looks butt-loads more menacing and dangerous than Luffy, so a higher bounty kinda makes sense.
Fun Fact: "Samehada", as this alter-ego shall be dubbed is - surprise, surprise - a shark related name. It means shark skin in Japanese! It also doubles as a Naruto reference, if you squint.
Anyway, crew interaction! Some of it, anyway! Establishing different relations with everyone who hasn't properly met our spit-fire yet. Except Usopp. Wonder what's up with that?
So, we leave Cocoyashi behind and move on to the final stretch before Grand Line. Loguetown! The city of the beginning and the end! We might even meet a familiar face we haven't seen in a while and say hello, too. Heh-heh-heh...
Not much else to say here. Hmm? What was that? A flashback? What are you talking about? There is no flashback anywhere. You're crazy.
~Till Next Episode~