Disclaimer: I have no claim over the source material.

Thank you as always to my betas Sassenach Wench and Sihaya9 and my Pediatric ICU pal Kimpy for all her help sorting out my medical terminology.

This chapter has been edited for adult content. Go to my profile for links to the unedited versions.

Crankward

BPOV

After discussing it with Edward and Dr. Kellison, we decided that I could spend every other night with Edward in the hospital while staying with Emmett and Rose the other nights until Edward's release.

Thursday morning, a flow of doctors came in and out of Edward's room as though it had a revolving door separating it from the hallway. Surgeons came to check up on his incision before removing half of the staples, stating they were extremely pleased with his progress.

Next came the orthopedic doctors who examined the new x-rays of his ribs. They griped about the delay in casting his torso and admonished him for moving too much. The poor man has stayed as still as humanly possible this entire time though, so I really don't know what he could have done differently. They finally sighed and agreed that the sweaty environment of the cast would have definitely increased the likelihood of infection. After a discussion with the surgeons, they decided that the incision was healed to a point that the risk of infection was greatly diminished. They placed orders for Edward's torso and right shoulder to be cocooned in a plaster cast later this afternoon.

Edward grumbled after they left. I sighed deeply, internally knowing that the reality was going to be even worse. My fairly reasonable and patient boyfriend was about to disappear completely.

Men, as a rule, are tough and strong on a daily basis, but you injure them, keep them from doing the things they want to do, or make them even the slightest bit dependent on others and they become the most irritable colicky babies you've ever seen. I suspected that Edward was going to be a shining example of that tendency.

The ortho consults were followed by physical therapists who came in to touch base, discuss timelines for when he would begin basic therapy and how they would progress to get him back on the job as soon as was reasonably possible without causing more harm.

Later, respiratory therapists came in. They began Edward on breathing exercises to help him rehabilitate his scarred lung tissue as he cursed and complained about the pain with each new exercise. Yes, it was going to be a very LONG recovery!

A few visitors tried to pop in throughout the day, but quickly left to make way for the swarm of doctors who were pestering and irritating my already cantankerous boyfriend. Finally around three in the afternoon, the parade of medical professionals stopped and we were left with a short stretch of peace and quiet as Edward's exhausted head flopped back against the pillow with a long languished growl.

"I'm going to fucking kill somebody, Bella! This is ridiculous!" He huffed; his face flushed an angry red tone.

"I know, baby, but its all necessary," I whispered, settling on the side of his bed and running my fingers comfortingly. "Bodies take a while to heal. If you don't let yourself heal properly, you will have more problems on down the road. Just try to get through all of this. It will be worth it later, I promise." I bent down and kissed his forehead and then gently moved to his mouth.

Before I knew what was happening, his lips parted and his tongue invaded my surprised mouth with fervor. I could feel his tension and desperation in the kiss. His good hand snaked into my hair, pulling me closer. A moan rumbled in his chest, yet he was so into the kiss that he didn't even flinch in pain the way he had been doing lately.

A minute or so later, he pulled away, panting hard, and cocking a smirk at me. "Respiratory therapy my ass, I'll just kiss the hell out of my girl for a while. It's definitely a much more pleasant way to practice holding my breath and panting shallowly."

I giggled, leaning down to peck his lips again as my hands lightly massaged his jaw. He closed his eyes and leaned his face into my hand, sighing softly. His eyes slowly opened, the bright green was slightly darkened.

"I miss you, baby. I miss feeling your skin, and tasting your body, and feeling the warmth of you surrounding me. I know I'm being an ass today, but I'm frustrated in every way a man can be frustrated. I just want to go home! I'm sick of being stuck in this fucking bed, not able to move, and having to piss in a damn bottle because I'm not even allowed to go to the head! I'm sick of not being able to get more than a couple of hours of sleep at a time thanks to the endless procession of people coming in to poke and prod me and shove pills down my throat! And most of all, I'm sick of being close to you and not being able to touch you the way I really want to and not having you touch me back. It's driving me fucking insane, baby! I need a release! I really need you to help me, baby. I'm dying here!"

He grabbed my hand and shoved it down to the top of his pelvis, under the blanket where his very hard and very prominent erection stood. Just from the feel, I could tell it must have been incredibly painful. I looked up at his pleading eyes apologetically.

"Oh my poor Edward, you must be so uncomfortable, but baby, I can't do that now! Anyone could come in here any moment. Not only that, I work here. It could totally destroy my reputation. All of that aside, it could really hurt you to do that. I don't want to cause a setback, making you stay here longer."

He scoffed and rolled his eyes in disgust and frustration followed quickly by snapping at me with venom lacing his voice. "Damn it, Bella, it's a fucking hand job! How the hell is playing with my dick going to hurt my chest?"

I rolled my eyes and pulled my hand away, moving back to the side of bed, and removing all physical contact with his body. "Because it isn't just your dick involved in the process, baby. When you climax, your whole body tenses up. As a rule, you arch off the bed and grab hard to the sheets and breathe really, really heavily, like the way the therapists said to avoid breathing. Any one of those reactions could set you back for weeks. I don't want to set you back, baby. I know you need the release, but you'll be even worse off if you hurt yourself."

He grumbled and crossed his good arm over his body, rolling his eyes and refusing to look at me. After waiting a couple of minutes to see if he would calm down and look at me again, I finally gave up. I got up from the bed to sit in the recliner and peruse some reading material Carlisle had given me to prepare me for my new afternoon rotations in pediatrics. There were many areas of pediatrics to check into, but he decided I would be best served by starting on the infectious diseases hallway.

I tried to focus on the pages full of information about the protocols of the hallway and read a little more about the doctors who specialized in that area, but I found it hard. I knew he was hurting and frustrated, but how he was acting hurt my feelings anyway. I was just trying to look out for his best interests, which were above all to get the heck out of his hospital to heal in a more peaceful environment at home.

Occasionally, I would hear him sigh from his bed and huff, followed by the sheets rustling quietly. Finally, after half an hour, I heard his throat clear across the room. I glanced up to peek at him to see him frowning over at me sadly.

I got up and walked to the side of his bed. "Do you need anything, sweetheart?"

He grabbed my hand and pulled it to his mouth. "I'm sorry, Bella. I'm being such an ass. I'm just so frustrated and uncomfortable and, as stupid as it sounds, it sort of hurt my feelings when you rejected the idea. I'm just being a fucking baby, but you're right on all counts. I'm sorry. You're the fucking doctor. I should listen to you because you know what damage I could do if I push myself too fast. I'm so sorry, baby."

I ran my hands through his hair and sighed. "I know, baby. It's hard," I snorted, "both literally and figuratively."

He rolled his eyes and chuckled slightly.

"But I promise you that as soon as I think it will be safe for you, I will give you a very long, extra special oral treat, okay?"

His eyes twinkled. His hips shifted a little under the blankets, making me giggle. "Promise?"

I smiled and leaned down to kiss him gently but also seductively, teasing his mouth with my tongue. I tugged on his bottom lip with my teeth as I pulled away, earning a moan.

"That's just cruel until it's actually safe, you know?"

I sighed, "Sorry, just wanted to give you a preview. I promise not to do that again until you can participate more fully."

He let go of my hand and patted the bed next to him. "Can I at least touch you?"

I sat up wide-eyed. "No baby, that wouldn't be fair to you. Not only that, I don't want you to strain yourself that way either."

He really rolled his eyes that time. "Strain? How is feeling you up with my one good hand and maybe a little finger action going to strain me?"

I shook my head with a half smile, half grimace. "No, baby, it's fine. I can wait."

"Maybe I can't…didn't you listen to my speech? I miss the feel of your body and the taste of your skin. Even if I can't get off, can't I at least enjoy that part?"

I sighed and whispered. "Let me think about it. Even if the answer is yes, it won't be until tonight."

He smiled brightly at me with the first truly excited twinkle shimmering in his eyes since he woke up and I knew I was probably going to give in. I laughed and leaned down to kiss his forehead just as another knock came at the door. I looked at him with an 'I told you so' expression and he snorted lightly, letting go of my hand.

Ortho took him out of the room in order to utilize special physical therapy equipment to help them cast him without allowing him to move too much. I grabbed my toiletries and snuck into the bathroom for a quick shower while he was gone. When I got out, I threw on some clean clothes and combed my hair, leaving it damp. As I exited the bathroom, I jumped to find someone sitting in the recliner in the corner of the room, looking out the window.

"Tanya?"

She jumped in response and turned to look at me, seeming truly upset. I crossed the room, pulling the small plastic chair in front of her, and resting my hands on her knees. She shifted slightly in the seat before putting her hands on mine, squeezing hard.

"Now that things have calmed down and Edward is getting better, I need to talk to you about something."

I nodded and stayed quiet to let her continue.

"I thought I should explain a few things to you. Um, James, the man with the gun in the lobby, I sort of knew him."

My eyes widened. My heart thumped hard a few times as I sucked in a breath and waited for her to continue.

"I was so shocked when he took his mask off and it was him. I had no clue he was, well, crazy." She stared to shake and tears welled in her eyes. She sucked in a big breath and rolled her eyes. "What is wrong with me that I attract guys like this, Bella? I don't understand. Why can't I see them for who they are?"

I shook my head. I was a bit lost now, so I squeezed her hands. "Tanya, calm down honey. I'm a little confused. Please explain a little better, hon."

She sighed and gulped hard. "About a week after I moved into the apartment, I was coming home one night after work with a bag of groceries. The bag broke and the groceries went flying all over the hallway outside of my door. I yelled and started trying to gather up my groceries to take them inside. When I looked up, there stood James. He smiled at me and helped me stand up. He took my key to open my apartment and helped me carry in the groceries. He introduced himself as one of my neighbors in the building. He seemed really nice and outside of you guys I didn't really have any friends. Once he helped me settle everything on the table, he said goodbye and left."

"I didn't hear from him for a while after that, but every once in a while I would bump into him in the building, the elevator, the laundry room, you know public areas than any tenants would interact in. It all seemed so natural and normal, and slowly we built up a sort of friendship. We would talk about anything and everything. He listened to me go on for hours about Larry and my fears raising this baby by myself. I thought he was a really great friend."

"He was around a lot more the week before Thanksgiving. I guess he never left town at all like the police thought, because he spent the whole week in my building. Pretty much every minute I wasn't at work, I was with him. I swear, Bella, I didn't know! I had no idea." She began to sob into her hands and I leaned forward to hug her shoulders.

"He just didn't act that way with me at all. He was sweet and attentive. He cooked me meals and made me put my feet up, saying pregnant moms needed to rest. He even told me he cared about me and thought he was falling in love with me…but really he was just using me to hide in plain sight from the cops the whole time. When he pulled the gun on me, I was scared, but when he pulled off the mask and I realized it had been James all along, that he looked at me with such hatred and pure evil in his eyes, I was absolutely heartbroken!"

I shushed her and ran my hands through her hair, trying to comfort her as her body vibrated with her sobs. "I just don't understand, Bella. How can someone be so good at pretending when they're really so evil? And why the fuck do they always prey on me? Am I that fucking gullible? Do I have a sign tattooed on my head that reads 'doormat'?"

"No, Tanya. I don't know why they seem to find you, but you are not a doormat. It's okay, honey. This isn't good for the baby; you really need to calm down."

About ten minutes later, I finally had her calmed down again. Moments later, Edward was wheeled into the room on a gurney, looking ten shades of annoyed. He groaned and moaned as they transferred him to the bed and propped him up, tucking pillows around him and behind his head before finally leaving us alone again.

Tanya didn't stay much longer, sensing Edward's negative disposition. I followed her into the hallway and hugged her one more time, trying to assure her that someday she would meet someone who would treat her the way she deserved to be treated. She hugged me back and thanked me in a flat and unbelieving voice before disappearing down the hallway, leaving me alone with Whineward. Not that I could blame him for being whiney because that body cast couldn't be comfortable in the least, but still I hoped my patience would hold out.

I walked back in and climbed onto the bed next to Edward only to discover that the torso cast made hugging and cuddling with him nearly impossible. We both huffed, annoyed that our contact was now going to be so limited. I shifted instead to rest my head on his left shoulder that was thankfully bare, cuddling up to his bare left arm with a sigh.

"This is going to be a long five weeks," I moaned, kissing his shoulder and tipping my face up to look into his.

"Yeah, tell me about it. Try being the one stuck inside this hard itchy fucking thing. I can't even rest in bed comfortably! I've been in it all of thirty fucking minutes and I'm already ready to tear it off with my bare fingers."

I sighed and settled back against his shoulder. He flipped through the channels on the television. As the evening wore on, several more visitors stopped by including Emmett, who teased him about being a mummy, while Jasper joked that he looked more like he was growing the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man out of his side. Edward snapped back his own quips in retaliation and I found myself grateful that he was able to take some of the pent up frustration out on someone else for a while. Hopefully, by the time we were alone again tonight, he would have gotten most of it out of his system.

Esme and Carlisle popped in just before visiting hours ended. Esme fawned over a frustrated Edward who was quietly, enduring it to appease his mom.

Meanwhile, Carlisle settled in next to me to talk about my peds rotation. He gave me a few more pointers about how best to handle some of the Attendings who worked that floor on a regular basis. I had heard a rumor that a couple of those doctors gave the surgeons a run for their money on the jackass scale, but I wasn't going to say that out loud to Carlisle, seeing as how he was a surgeon himself.

Finally, visiting hours ended. Edward lured me to the bed with a crooked finger, smiling deviously, with desire darkening his green irises.

"I think the time has come, my love. The only thing keeping me from totally losing it today was the idea that I was going to get to touch you tonight."

I glanced at the clock and blushed before walking across to his bed, sitting on the edge. The second I sat down, his good hand went directly to my thigh, rubbing up and down, growing closer to the apex of my legs with each pass. I grabbed his hand just before it brushed between my legs and glanced at the clock again.

"Wait, your nurse will be back through here in about ten minutes to give you your dose of Vicodin and check your IV. After that, we should have a couple of hours before being interrupted again. Until then, you need to cut it out."

He smirked at me. He pulled his hand from mine, raising it to brush across my cheek and his fingers brushed my lips. I kissed them gently before he slipped one between my lips. I nibbled it gently, causing his eyes to roll into the back of his head. I giggled before releasing it and kissing the palm of his hand, just then a knock sounded at the door. Edward looked over smiling eagerly.

The nurse, Kim, looked taken aback at Edward's massive mood swing from the last time that she had been in the room. She checked his IV and asked him the typical questions before giving him his Vicoden pill with a glass of water. He took the proffered meds eagerly and started to look frustrated when she took her time leaving the room.

As soon as her back was turned, his hand gripped my thigh eagerly. He began massaging its way further up toward my hip, freezing when the nurse turned around to ask one more question. Her eyes rested on his hand on my thigh, dangerously close to my groin, and her eyebrows rose before she smirked slightly.

"I should remind you, Mr. Masen, that you are not to overly exert yourself physically. Keep your breathing regulated and keep your injured arm immobilized at all times. The CNA's are due to check in with you in an hour because their rotation got off this evening. I'll tell them you requested to be allowed to sleep, so you should get about three hours of uninterrupted peace." Then she winked and flipped off the light, disappearing through the doorway, allowing it to click loudly behind her.

The moonlight shining through the blinds of the window illuminated the massive smile on Edward's face as I leaned forward to kiss his lips seductively. If I were completely honest, I needed this just as much as he did. I really wished I could help him with his issues, but hopefully, this could appease him some as well.

Our tongues tangled. My hands roamed his hair, his neck, and his one bare shoulder.

His one free hand wrapped around my body. He grabbed eagerly at my butt, kneading it with anxious fingers as he pulled me against the plaster covering his torso. Our breathing picked up, but I tried to pay attention to his cues through the haze of lust to make sure he wasn't breathing too hard. My attention to detail was lost when I felt his hand skim along my hip and up my side. His hand continued its slide under the hem of my shirt and over my ribs, palming me.

His hand moved back down to the hem of my shirt, tugging it up. I reached down and grabbed it, ripping it off of my head, and tossing it to the floor. I reached behind to unclasp my bra, letting it join my shirt. I heard Edward moan and saw his teeth gleam blue in the moonlight. His smile grew wider.

"I missed these beautiful mounds of soft sweet goodness." He mumbled.

Before I could stop the motion, he reached behind, hooking his hand behind my back, pulling me toward him. I barely caught my weight on the bed above his head before falling onto his body, just as his mouth teased my chest. I threw my head back and moaned at the unexpected pleasure. He teased me relentlessly with his tongue.

It was an exercise in pleasurable torture as he continued to worship my chest, dividing his attention equally between both breasts.I could feel the pressure growing within me and was beginning to wonder if I was going to be taken over the edge simply by the eagerness with which he worshipped my chest.

"Mmmmm, you tasted even better than I remember. So fucking good." His mouth clamped onto mine with eager passion as his hand once again began to roam down my torso to the waist of my pants.

He quickly used his hands to bring me to climax, stalking dirty in my ear as his fingers worked me, eventually making me stifle a loud scream.

He continued his attentions to my body until the shivering finally stopped. I struggled not to collapse on top of him as my arms and legs felt as though they had turned to jelly.

I rolled onto the bed next to him, resting my head on his shoulders, just as his fingers returned to his mouth again. I smiled at his love of my juices that I would probably never fully understand, but was grateful for none the less. My breasts were rubbing painfully against the plaster covering his torso as I panted, kissing his shoulder, but I didn't care. Finally, I regained my breath and some control over my muscles. I shifted myself once more to kiss is mouth. I gently thanked him with my tongue and lips before leaning back to run my hands over his hair, neck, and face, mumbling 'thank you' over and over.

He smiled and nodded, saying that he was just as grateful as I was and he felt much better.

I smiled apologetically, wishing I could return the favor, but knowing it would do far more harm than good right now. Instead, I laid next to him as his breathing evened out and began brainstorming for his reciprocation the second he was healthy enough to receive it.

I lay there next to him about ten minutes before deciding to climb off the bed and get dressed again so we wouldn't get caught. I brought my recliner over to his bedside to settle in for the night, resting my hand over his on the bed and drifted off into a deep contented sleep.

Friday was another stream of doctors, therapists, visitors, nurses, and aids. I know I felt like I was ready to scream, so I could only imagine what poor Edward was going through. Finally, I saw the very person I needed to talk to. Dr. Cope examined Edward with a sweet smile and an understanding dismissal of his short answers to her questions. When she finally excused herself, I followed her and asked if I could have a second to speak with her before she moved on.

"Sure, dear," she answered motioning to the supply closet with her plump hand.

I stepped in as she followed me into the small space, flipping on a light and closing the door behind her.

"I assumed this was of a private nature, or else you would have spoken with me in Edward's presence. What can I help you with, dear?"

I blushed and swallowed hard, trying to work up my courage to discuss this sensitive subject with her. Dr. Cope was also an instructor at the university and I had interacted with her on several occasions. I sighed deeply and massaged between my eyes with my fingers before looking back up sheepishly.

"This is a very sensitive subject, Dr. Cope. I'm honestly embarrassed to bring it up, but I'm willing to do anything, no matter how embarrassing, for that man, so here I go."

She smiled sweetly at me nodding for me to continue.

"Edward is suffering from…frustrations…of the sexual persuasion. Uhm, he's in need of…physical, uh, release, which I advised against last night for fear of irritating his lungs and other injuries, due to his reactions to…such release…and…"

Understanding glinted in her eyes. "You are asking how soon he can be brought to orgasm without reinjuring his body from his muscular contractions and exertion on his lungs."

I sighed in relief while my blush grew deeper.

She chuckled, leaning against the wall as she shuffled through some papers in her personal notebook. "He's actually doing quite well. Deep breaths hurt him, but his breath sounds are strong and solid, he just needs to strengthen them some more, so the breathing should actually be more beneficial than detrimental to his lungs. His ribs, however, could potentially be damaged, although the cast should restrict him from being able to shift his position enough to damage them. The muscle contractions may cause pain in the incision site and around the trauma of the broken ribs…"

"Basically, I would say that it shouldn't re-injure him, necessarily, since he is in the cast, but I'm guessing that the pain would inhibit him from actually reaching any true release. If you want to try, then I think it's safe, but I'd personally recommend giving him another week or so to heal. By then, the pain should be significantly less and he might have a chance of actually enjoying it."

I smiled brightly and thanked her. "I'll leave the ultimate decision up to him, but thank you for the insight."

She nodded with a small smile, placing a hand on my shoulder. "Of course dear, a good orgasm would probably go a long way to improving his demeanor, which I'm pretty sure the entire staff would appreciate."

She left the room chuckling.

I stood, mouth agape, at her retreating gray tinged red bun on the top of her head, before finally breaking into my own disbelieving chuckle. I exited the supply closet to return to Edward's room. I walked in to find him snapping at the respiratory therapist, who was walking him through his deep breathing exercises. I couldn't help but chuckle again. He shot me a dirty look, but didn't actually say anything to me, instead turning back to the poor flustered girl trying to help him finish the vital exercises with a grunt.

I settled into the chair with a smirk, continuing to look over the information Carlisle had given me, taking note of the large percentage of kids in the unit that also had Cystic Fibrosis. It made sense in a way since CF often causes respiratory tract issues for kids. The treatment has come a long way since the early days of the disease. There was a girl a couple of years ahead of Emmett in high school that had CF. It had been the talk of the town when she was diagnosed as a young child, they told her family she wouldn't live past the age of seventeen. The last time we were back home, we bumped into her parents who said she was still alive and doing well in Minnesota. She was now thirty, married, and adopting a baby with her husband. Suddenly, I found myself quite excited to get to work on the peds floor.

I looked up at the clock just as the therapist was packing up her things to see that if I didn't hurry I was going to be late for my first regularly scheduled appointment with Dr. Kellison. I walked over to the side of the bed and leaned over to kiss Edward's frowning, pouting lips. I leaned in to whisper in his ear.

"I just got some good news for you, Mr. Masen. If you're a good boy, we can attempt to take care of your issues much sooner than I had anticipated. So, be nice to the poor medical staff, and I'll see you in an hour or so after my appointment with Dr. Kellison. I'll give you all the details when I get back."

He grinned for the first time today.

I smiled, running my hand through his hair, tousling it teasingly, before making my way to the elevator banks to go down to Dr. Kellison's office.

The appointment was frustrating and tiring. We talked about how I was coping with everything, including Crankward. Dr. Kellison laughed at my inventive variations of Edward's name. She said it was perhaps a tiny bit passive aggressive, but humorous nonetheless. Then I told her about what Tanya had told me this morning.

"It's freaky, Dr. Kellison. He wormed himself into such periphery portions of our lives that we never even knew that he had any knowledge of. What if there were others? What if he had some kind of second in command that's going to come along some day and catch us off guard? What if our life will never be safe?"

Dr. Kellison nodded at my fears with a sigh. "These are all very valid worries, Bella. It will take you a long time before you will ever feel completely safe again. Your group has dealt with many things these past few months that most people never have to encounter. Just like any other victim of a violent crime, your foundations have been shaken. With time, I believe you will start to feel safer again, but it won't be any time soon."

"I feel bad for Tanya, too. I mean how many times can unscrupulous people manipulate one person? It's not fair to her how he used her and preyed on her vulnerable position. She's been through so much and all she really wants is someone to love her for who she is and accept her. She wants what…" I trailed off thinking of my cranky Whineyward up in his room, suddenly feeling a bit guilty for being so annoyed with his justifiably cantankerous ways. "…she wants what I have with Edward, and I'm taking it for granted."

I sighed and rubbed my fist over my tired eyes before looking back up at Dr. Kellison who was smiling at me gently. "You know, Bella, just because you love someone and appreciate them, doesn't mean you can't get frustrated with them and argue with them. Some days you may even want to actually cause them bodily harm. It's part of the human condition. None of us are perfect and you shouldn't feel guilty for getting frustrated with Edward from time to time. Matter of fact, I would honestly be much more concerned if you weren't frustrated with him and the situation, because that would be unhealthy. Healthy relationships have their ups and downs and that's okay."

I nodded slightly, taking in what she had to say with a small smile. She locked her gaze with me, making sure I understood her meaning before glancing at the clock with a sigh.

"Well, it seems our time is up. I swear our sessions go so much more quickly than any of my other patients. I'll see you Monday at six, right?"

I smiled and nodded. "Right, Monday at six. I'm sure I'll have a ton to talk about since that's my first day back on the floor."

She placed a hand on my shoulder as she walked me to the door. "You'll be fine, Bella. I have faith in you."

I blushed and thanked her before returning to Edward's room to find it actually dark and quiet. I smiled as I listened to him breathing in a steady rhythm.

I quietly crossed the room and settled myself in front of my laptop, logging into the wireless network. I checked my email and replied to a couple from Dr. K, checking on my progress and looking forward to me returning to her service next week. I also had messages from each of the femmes, Rose, and several of my boys.

After I replied to the plethora of messages from my friends and family, I remembered that Christmas was quickly approaching. I had zero time to do any shopping. I spent a little time searching online for a few gifts for my friends and family, getting quite frustrated at the fact that I could think of absolutely nothing to give Edward. I wanted to give him something special, but I kept drawing a total blank.

Once I had thoroughly frustrated myself on the online shopping front, I switched gears back to work. I started perusing online medical journals to read up on the most recent research regarding infectious diseases and CF patients and the most cutting edge of treatments. I also read about the rare, but not completely unheard of anomalies of children with CF who slip through infant screenings and are not diagnosed until a later age when the condition begins taking a toll on their bodies enough to bring attention to the disease's progression.

I was so wrapped up in the newest clinical studies out of Minnesota that I didn't even notice that Edward's breathing had changed until I heard his voice behind me

"Hey, sexy, what are you doing over there?"

I chuckled, "Just getting a little work done in preparation for next week. How about you? You feel any better after your nap?"

He sighed and nodded slightly, gesturing for me to climb in next to him.

I crossed the room and gingerly climbed up by his left side, drawing on his cast with my nail. "So, do I get to sign your cast with a sharpie?"

He chuckled lightly. "Sure, let me guess what you'd write…something like 'Property of Bella Swan so back off'?"

I started laughing harder than I meant to because that had actually been exactly what I was thinking. The little nurse's aids kept trying to give him sponge baths, at which I had to swat the little flies away, insisting I would do it myself. I wouldn't mind if they were old grandma type ladies, or even a young lady who approached it with a semblance of dignity and professionalism, but no, they were all young hot girls who stared at Edward like he was their own personal Robert Pattinson. They were practically drooling over seeing his man parts. Oh hell no! I insisted that I was a doctor and I would take care of all of those types of physical needs for Edward…speaking of…

I stopped laughing and looked up at him with a mischievous smile.

"What?" He smiled back, looking intrigued and a little excited.

"Oh, I just thought you might want to know what I learned this morning about what favors you may and may not safely receive."

His eyes began to dance as his smile grew wider. "Oh? And what did you discover, my beautiful Dr. Bella?"

I took a deep breath and let my fingers travel up and down his arm softly as I began speaking. "Well, Dr. Cope is a long time friend of mine, so I asked her what the dangers would be of me taking care of your needs for you, and how soon it would be safe."

I let my fingers drift down to play with his fingertips where they lay down along the side of his body. "It seems that your lungs are in good shape and that the heavy breathing would be a good therapy for them. Your ribs and muscles won't like the heavy breathing, but the cast will keep them from being overly extended to the point that you would damage them."

I let my fingers dance over from his fingertips to his hipbone. He tensed in reaction and then immediately hissed, which I suspected was thanks to the pain from the muscle contraction. I teased along his hipbone and thigh, avoiding his rock hard erection.

"The only problem she believed would be that the involuntary muscle contractions and the action of breathing so hard would probably be so painful at this point that it would keep you from enjoying the experience and actually being able to get all the way off."

I tipped forward and nibbled at his ear as I let my hand slide over his erection. It twitched under my hand.

"Now, I leave it up to you if you want to try it. I really don't want to hurt you, but I find that I can't really deny you anything because I love you so damn much."

I grasped him a little harder, causing him to moan, jerk, and then hiss again at the pain. I let my thumb brush over his head that was sticking up above his briefs. That caused him to jerk slightly, illustrating the very pain I warned about.

"If you want to give it a try, I'll stay again tonight and see how well it goes, but I agree with the doctor that it will probably hurt more than feel good until you're a little more healed up in maybe a week."

I brushed my thumb across the head again, earning the same reaction and the same accompanying hiss. He whimpered in defeat, banging his head off the pillow behind him three times in frustration.

"You're right. It's going to hurt too fucking much, damn it! You feel so good though, baby. Can you maybe just hold it a while and try not to touch the head since it's so sensitive it automatically makes me jump?"

I nodded and leaned up to kiss him again.

He returned the kiss with sweetness. "Thank you for checking into it and trying for me, baby. I do appreciate it."

I nodded with a sigh, as I gently stroked the lower portion of the shaft slowly, giving him the sensation, but unfortunately lacking the release.

It didn't last long before there was a knock at the door. I quickly pulled my hand away and curled it around his arm, leaning against his shoulder.

The nurse came in and did all the necessary checks. She smiled at us before exiting the room, most likely relieved to find that Edward was being more cooperative than he had been any other time today. Visitors began to come and go soon after.

I finally bid good night to Edward and left with Emmett to spend another night in my old room. It was still hard to leave Edward, but it was getting a tiny bit easier each day.

I called him before I went to sleep and again when I woke up with another nightmare, but at least this time I wasn't screaming loudly enough to wake Emmett and Rose. I talked to him long enough to calm myself back down again and finally fell back to sleep for the rest of the night.

o~O~o

The weekend came and went quickly. The next thing I knew, I was waking up bright and early Monday morning at Emmett's. I showered quickly and slipped into my scrubs, sliding my stethoscope around my neck and clipping my ID on my pocket. I looked in the mirror with a sigh. It was good to be back.

I walked the few blocks to the hospital alone, entering through the main lobby. I made it to the locker room just as Alice finished changing.

She looked up at me with a bright smile, running over to give me a hug. She had stopped by as often as possible over the last week, but between graveyards in the ER and the busy morning traffic of the rounding docs, we hadn't seen each other often.

Krista and Sabrina gave me big hugs and welcomed me back as we walked up to the second floor to find Dr. K. She smiled when I walked up with the group, stating that it was good to have all her girls back together again.

The morning went smoothly; we continued our rounds with her and then I left them at noon, sneaking up to Edward's room to have lunch with him. He was in another cruddy mood, but seemed to be uplifted slightly by my presence. When we finished, I took the elevator up to the sixth floor peds infectious diseases ward. I slowly approached the nurse's station, feeling more timid than I usually did at the hospital. This was all so new and I was still not quite myself after everything that had happened.

I walked up to the desk where a really sweet looking nurse with brown hair and glasses sat working on a file. I stepped in front of her with a timid smile.

"Excuse me, I'm Isabella Swan. I'm supposed to start working up here today. Could you help me?"

She looked up with a big smile. "Dr. Swan, it's such a pleasure to meet you," she intoned, putting her hand out to shake. "I'm Angela Webber. I'm the charge nurse for this floor. You'll want to make your way to the doctor's lounge at the end of the hall on the right. This is one of the few floors where the doctors actually properly utilize their lounge," she said with an eye roll. "Dr. Powers is in there. He's the tall one with thick, black-rimmed glasses and the short black hair. He'll stand out since the rest of the ones here today are all short and either balding or don't bother coloring their hair like he does."

We chuckled together and I thanked her before heading down the hallway to the door. I paused outside to gain my courage and then knocked twice before opening the door, stepping into the lounge. All eyes in the male filled room drifted to me when I entered. Most of the eyes observing me were dull and uninterested except for two sets that appeared to be scrutinizing me and finding me coming up short. Unfortunately, one set belonged to my new 'mentor', Dr. Powers.

I crossed the room to stand in front of him. I extended my hand as I introduced myself. He sneered at me and grabbed my hand limply before dropping it and turning back to his conversation, completely ignoring me. I stood uncomfortably, not knowing what I should do, when he finally turned to me with a snide expression.

"So are this year's interns only trained to stare with gaping mouths like fish mouthed ignoramuses, or are you actually good for something."

I swallowed hard and felt my heart hammering in my chest. I stuttered over my words. "I..I'm sorry sir. Dr. Cullen told me that you would tell me what I needed to do and show me the ropes. This is all new to me, sir."

His nostrils flared as he watched me through narrow black eyes before he finally rolled them with a sigh. "You want to make yourself useful? Go sort the medical supplies in the main supply closet. It's a mess and the nurses are too busy doing their job of keeping things running around here to be bothered. It seems just the right job for a sniveling first year intern who is manipulating herself through the ranks."

"Excuse me?" I blurted in surprise at his offending suggestion.

"You heard me. Now if you want to stay on this rotation, I suggest you get started on the supply room."

I stood there, staring at him for a moment before I decided that decapitating him would most definitely get me kicked out of the program. Also an afternoon in a quiet room, free of interactions with humans, was probably best for the mood I just found myself in, so I took a deep breath.

"Okay, you know where to find me if you decide to actually do your job and train me." I turned on my heel and left the room with my head held high. I closed the door hard behind me, but being sure not to slam it and earn a reputation of a child throwing a temper.

I managed to hold in the tears burning in my eyes until I reached the supply closet three doors down, I opened it to find a disaster area of disorganized chaos. Most everything was still boxed, leading me to believe that this was basically the bulk supply closet where things remained until the main supply closet that the floor used needed something replenished. I took a deep breath, opening and closing my fists a few times.

After a few minutes centering myself I decided that if I was going to get assigned a job, I was damn well going to do it and do it well. I began sorting through the massive piles of boxed medical supplies.

Four hours later, I had that closet organized, alphabetized, and perfectly spaced before I turned to walk out and go down to my six o'clock appointment with Dr. Kellison. As I opened the door and stepped out, I bumped into Angela.

She stood there, frowning at me, and then glanced at the supply closet with a shocked expression.

"Oh, he didn't!" she exclaimed as her face turned a funny puce shade.

I nodded solemnly. "Oh yes, he did."

"Oh, Bella, I'm so sorry. It's a boy's club up here. Truth of the matter is that you're going to have to earn your place the hard way by being tough as nails and proving yourself. Tomorrow should be better for you though. Dr. Salazar will be here. She'll probably insist you call her Carmen like she does me. She'll help you elbow your way into the boys club. Her husband Eleazar was in the lounge, so I'm sure she'll be well aware of the situation before she even meets you tomorrow."

I sighed. "Oh I hope so, I was so looking forward to this. I'm pretty sure that decapitating your supervisor is grounds for dismissal from the program and a one way trip to Joliet."

She chuckled and nodded. "Can I help you with anything else, Dr. Swan?"

"Please, call me Bella?"

She smiled with another nod.

"And no thank you. I have to go for an appointment here in a little bit anyway, but thank you."

"I'm around if you need anything at all, okay?"

"Thank you, Nurse Webber."

"That would be Angela to you, Bella," she said with a smirk before turning and walking down the hallway.

I rushed down to Dr. Kellison's office, ready to vent about my first day on the peds floor and the asshole, Dr. Powers. Dr. Kellison was angry too, but watched with a touch of amusement as I went on to explain my thoughts of how decapitation would be detrimental to my career and how much I'd love to shove an enema up his ass, earning a small chuckle.

Once I was done with my appointment, I felt much better. I walked up to Edward's room to find him pouting again. When he saw me, he smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. He asked me half-heartedly how my day was.

I explained everything, including the asshole doctor.

He listened passively, nodding occasionally, and grunting once in a while. I was a little disappointed he wasn't more into the conversation, but figured he had a long day.

We ate supper together and talked to a few guests. Before I knew it, ten o'clock had rolled around. I started to shift the chair toward his bed to settle in for sleep. I had brought a spare set of scrubs to change into in the morning, figuring I'd just get up extra early and shower in the women's shower by the locker room. I was just about to settle in when Edward grumbled something about going to Emmett's tonight.

"But I was at Emmett's last night. Tonight is my night to be here."

"You should go there, you'd sleep better."

"No, actually I sleep better here even with the nurses and CNA's coming in and out...you know that. What's going on with you? Don't you want me here?"

He crossed his arm across his body and huffed, frowning down at the blanket.

"Seriously? You don't want me to stay? Why?"

He half shrugged, as much as he could with his torso cast.

I could feel the sting in my eyes as the tears prickled in the corners.

"No, answer me…why don't you want me to stay? What happened this afternoon? You were fine at lunch."

"I'm not FINE, Isabella! I'm not fine at all. I just…I just need some space. People are around me all the time. I just need some fucking privacy. Can't I have at least one night of fucking solitude?"

I bit my lip, trying not to cry, but after the day I had, my restraint wouldn't hold out for long. I grabbed my bag with a sigh and stuffed my things in it.

"Okay, as you wish. I hope you enjoy your solitude, Edward. Goodnight."

He didn't even say goodnight. I closed the door and the second the latch clicked, my vision blurred with a curtain of tears. I didn't know why he was being this way, but all I knew was that it really hurt…a lot.

I tried to hide my distress, dabbing at my eyes and attempting to cover my hitching breath with fake coughs on my way to the elevator. Thankfully, I had a car to myself and let go once the doors closed. My vision was still blurred when I exited the building, heading to Emmett's in the cold Chicago night. It was now early December and the city was decked in festive lights and garland, but I couldn't even begin to see the beauty of the season past my own frustration and pain.

I knocked on Emmett's door at eleven.

He opened it with a confused expression on his face that quickly morphed to worry.

"C…Can I st..stay here tonight?"

He pulled me in, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. "Sure, honey, but why aren't you at the hospital with Edward?"

My breath hitched, "H…he didn't w..want me to st..stay. He said he wanted (hic) solitude for one night. S…so I came here. I hope it's okay."

He shook his head with a deep sigh. "Sure, kiddo. You always have a place here."

He led me to my room and helped me get settled in.

I lay on the bed wide-awake, watching the lights filtering through the slits on the blinds covering the window dance on the ceiling. For the first time since he woke up, I wouldn't be able to talk to Edward before I fell asleep. I woke up sweating and screaming three times that night and got up to face the next day feeling more exhausted than I had when I went to sleep.

Damn it, I needed to be on the top of my game, not dragging already. I got dressed and walked into the cold Chicago morning to face another day, hoping that it would be better than the last.

Okay, don't kill me, I promise that there is a reason for Edward's actions and you find out at the very beginning of the next chapter read.