Even worse, it starts to rain.
"Mhm. Lovely." I say angrily as my hair starts to get soaked. We shuffle along through the woods as the rain pours down on us. Finally Percy points out a neon sign in the darkness.
"Hmm. Is a neon sign in the middle of the woods suspicious? Nah." I say.
"Aunty Em's Garden Gnome Emporium." Grover reads out loud.
"Ew. I hate gnomes. Creepy little lawn ornaments." Then the smell of hamburgers hits us. I almost pass out. "I think I'll be ok though."
"Oh thank goodness! The lights are on inside." I notice and rush inside.
"Snack bar." Percy says wistfully.
"Snack bar." I agree.
"Are you two crazy?" Grover asks.
"Yes." I answer. Grover rolls his eyes. "This place is weird."
We ignore him.
The front lot is a forest of statues: cement animals, cement children, even a cement satyr playing the pipes which give Grover the creeps.
"Bla-ha-ha!" he bleats. "Looks like my Uncle Ferdinand."
"Come on Grover, you're just being parano…" I trail off as I remember the book. I get a good look at the satyr statue playing the pipes, and how maybe I'm imagining it but I swear I can almost see a look of horror on his face. Very impressive craftsmanship though.
"You know what. Maybe Grover has a point." I say. "I'm sure we can find another creepy rest stop somewhere else. I think we should leave."
"But Annabeth! There's food here." Percy whimpers. I can't say no to that face. But then I remember what we're up against.
"Ok. But Aunty Em's. Which sounds like M. Which is also the first letter of a certain Gorgon. A certain Gorgon which turns people to stone if they look at her. And we are currently standing in a forest of stone people! Is no one else concerned by this?" I ask. Percy knits his brow together, pondering this.
"Children! We so rarely get children here." A slippery voice sang behind us. A shiver ran up my spine.
"Close your eyes and follow my lead." I whisper to Percy and Grover. Then I close my own eyes.
"Yes! We are in fact children. Regular, normal, notinanyway demigods, or associated with gods in any way, actually, we're atheists. Yep. But um, where exactly are we?" I ask.
"Why, you are at Aunty Em's Garden Gnome Emporium. Surely you saw the sign when you walked in?" She asks.
"Mmm. Yes about that. You see, when we were wandering through the woods there was this uhh…lizard." For some reason that dinosaur from Jurassic Park, the Dilophosaurus, came to mind. Please forgive me. "This lizard appeared, it sort of looked like a dinosaur, and it spit some sort of acid or poison or venom, or I don't even know what in our eyes. So we can't see."
My eyes are closed, so I can't see Medusa's reaction. All I hear is silence. Then she breaks it.
"You…can't see? Anything?"
"Yep. Blind as a bat. By the way, you should really hire an exterminator to get rid of those dino- I mean lizards." I say. There's more silence. My guess is Medusa is trying to figure out how to deal with us if she can't turn us to stone.
"Maybe I can help get some of that acid out of your eyes?" She offers. I hear her turn. I make a risky decision, but I decide to peek my eye open. I'm right. Medusa turned to get something. Probably something she can impale us with. I tap Percy. He opens his eyes, sees Medusa, gives me a nod, and in a flash has decapitated her. With a thud, her head falls to the floor. A few snake fall out of a turban she's wearing. Warm ooze leaks out of the head.
"Nasty." I say.
"If that was Medusa…then that was Uncle Ferdinand." Grover says sadly. I grab a piece of fabric and wrap Medusa's head in it.
"What now?" Percy asks.
"I say we loot what we can in terms of food and money, and head out." I suggest.
"Sounds good. There's just one more thing I want to do before we go." Percy says. He disappears into another room. I hear some rummaging, and a second later he appears with a box in his hands. He puts the head into the box, and starts filling out an address to Mount Olympus. He slips the head into the box along with some golden drachmas.
"They're not going to like that." Grover warns. "They'll think you're impertinent."
The box disappears.
"I am impertinent." Percy says. Grover gives me a look, tacitly asking for help. I shrug.
"Not to be that guy…but the gods kinda deserve it. Plus, they're immortal. It's not like they can get turned into stone. Who knows, maybe they'll appreciate the gesture?" I say. Grover looks skeptical.
"Let's get out of here." I say. "These gnomes are giving me the creeps."
The next morning we (by we I mean Grover) find a lost poodle named Gladiola. After Grover has a few conversations with him (it's a satyr thing), we turn him in and get reward money. We have enough to get three tickets out west, straight to hell. Literally.
Unfortunately, we only have enough money to make it to Denver. I guess hell will have to wait a few more days. While on the train, Percy tells me about a dream he had the night before.
"Hm…Well. I suppose that mysterious clouded figure could be Hade. I suppose it could also maybe hypothetically be someone else, by that's only theoretical. Haha." I say. It was totally Kronos. I am very tempted to tell Percy and Grover, but I'm also worried that if I do I'll get the attention of the Editors, which is the last thing I want. I'm also worried because I haven't seen Nemo. There's a horrifying suspicion creeping up in the back of my mind, like that three day old sushi in the back of the fridge that no one wants to acknowledge, that the Editors may have gotten him. And it would be my fault. I bit my lip. I refuse to believe that may have happened. I just need to give Nemo some time.
When we got to St. Louis we were told over the intercom that we'd have a three hour delay before moving on to Denver.
"Let's get some food." Grover suggests. I am all on board with that. I'm about to agree and open my mouth to when instead, "The Gateway Arch. This may be my only chance to ride to the top. Are you coming or not?"
Whoa. What. Where did that come from? Must be something Annabeth really wants to do I guess. I just hope I don't have to burst out into song like last time (*cough*cough* Phantom).
So we head to the Gateway Arch. Grover smells for monsters, but explains that underground also smells like monsters. That doesn't make me feel better. I'm not an idiot, and I know that there's definitely going to be a monster here. I read the books. That's how this works. We stop somewhere, get attacked, repeat.
I feel nauseous when I see the tiny little box that's going to take us to the top.
"OOOoooo boy." I gulp.
"I thought you wanted to go to the top?" Percy asks, also clearly hesitant about the elevator.
"Yeah." I say, my voice several pitches higher than usual. I bring it back down to its usual sound. "Yeah, of course. It's just an elevator."
So we climb into the car. We're accompanied by a large plump lady and her dog, a Chihuahua with a rhinestone collar.
"No parents?" The lady asks. She has beady eyes; pointy, coffee-stained teeth; a floppy denim hat, and a denim dress that bulges so much, she looks like a blue-jean blimp.
"Wow. Ok. That's not creepy at all. Geez lady, do you ask that to all the kids you see walking around by themselves?" I turn to the guard in the elevator. "Look, all I'm saying is that if we go missing in the next 24 hours, you've got your first suspect."
Her Chihuahua growls at me. I hiss back. The woman says, "Now, now, sonny. Behave."
"Sonny? Is that his name?" Percy asks.
"No." The lady answers. Okkaaay then. This lady is sending out red flares. My spideysense is tingling.
As soon as we get to the top, I rush out. I take on look around at the windows and the height we're standing at, and I want to pass out. Thank god, the ranger announced the observation deck was closing in a few minutes. I rush back into the elevator, vertigo still making me woozy.
"You feeling okay?" Grover asks.
"Y-Yeah. I'll be fine." I say. The elevator doors close and we start heading down. I notice there's two other tourists in the elevator with us. "Where's Percy?" I ask.
"The elevator was full. He said he'd take the next one." Grover answers. My eye twitches.
"We left him along with Chihuahua LADY?" I ask. I start to panic.
"It'll be okay Annabeth. Percy can take care of himself." Grover assures me, but I can tell he's just as freaked out as I am. I turn to the guard in the elevator.
"We need to go back up." I say.
"No can do missy. Observation deck is closed." He answers. I frown at him. When the elevator lands, I grab Grover's hand and we rush outside. As we're locating the exit, we hear a loud boom and look at each other in horror.
"PPPEEEERCY!" We yell in unison as we burst into the daylight. I stare up at the Arch. There's now a gaping hole in its side. Without thinking of the consequences, I unfurl my wings and take to the sky. I rocket towards the hole. I pull out my knife as I land.
"Ok. Whose ass do I need to kick?" I ask. I look around, but Percy's gone. Only the fat lady and her Chihuahua, which has grown twelve sizes and now has a lion's head, body and hooves of a goat, and a snake for its tail.
"Damn. That is one ugly Chihuahua." I say.
"It's a CHIMERA!" The lady yells.
"Geez, chill out. Anyway, where's Percy?" I ask, trying to look threatening. The lady laughs.
"Splattered somewhere on the pavement below." She says. I'm furious. I've had enough of this lady. She wants to see something splattered on the pavement? I'll help her out. I make it appear as if I'm going to attack the Chihuahualiongoatsnakething, but instead I fake it out and grab ahold of its collar. Luckily for me, it's already very close to the hole and I just need to give it a little nudge. I use my wings and hurl it into the air. Unfortunately, my hand is stuck on its collar.
We both start plunging towards the pavement below. I start searching for the latch on the collar. After a painful second, I find it and unlatch it. I'm freed just as the animal hits the ground. It explodes in a glittery golden shower. The only thing left behind is the collar.
"Are you kidding me? That's my spoils of war? A ratchet collar." I frown but pick it up anyway. Then I remember Percy. I run over to Grover, who's standing shell-shocked.
"Grover! Where's Percy?" I ask. He can only point towards the river.
"The river? Thank god! That means he probably survived. Probably." I say. We search around the river banks for a few minutes. I'm about to suggest we go into the polluted river, but suddenly we catch sight of Percy.
"Percy!"
"We thought you'd gone to Hades the hard way!" Grover yells excitedly.
"Percy, are you okay? What happened?" I ask. He tells us about the lady and her Chihuahua.
"I knew that lady was suspicious." I say. He also tells us about a message some woman in the river told him.
"Do we really trust a strange woman in a river that tells us to go to Santa Monica?" I ask.
"It's a message from his dad! We can't ignore it." Grover says. I trust him. "Ok then. To Santa Monica."
"Whoa whoa whoa. Wait a second. Can you please explain what's up with the wings?" Percy asks. I didn't realize I handed hidden my wings. Plus Grover saw them before. Come on brain, come up with a good lie here. Please.
"I made them." I explain, vaguely remembering some myth I had heard mentioned at the camp. "I made them myself. Like Adalus."
"Daedalus?"
"Yep. That guy. I am a daughter of Athena." I point out. They seem to buy it.
"That's so cool! Do we get some?" Grover asks.
"I only had time to make one. When we get back to camp, I'll make you both a pair." I say. "But right now, we've got a date in Santa Monica."