Chapter 28
With the Grain
(Gibbs POV)
I hope I did the right thing. I had to seem certain in front of Tim and Tony, but when she took off afterwards I had my doubts. I know after Shannon and Kelly, I had to do somethin' in order to survive past the moment. I don't want her to resort to anything extreme and carry a secret like I've done for all these years. I know their killer only got what he deserved, but those things that have to stay in the darkest parts of my mind prey upon me, and she deserves better than a future drowned in bourbon and sawdust. So as I wonder and wait, I sand. I don't notice the darkness, the passing hours or the ache in my wrist from the repetitive motion. I could call but I trust Tony to look after her and if she's resting I don't want to disturb her.
Around 10 the followin' morning I hear a car door close outside then soon enough the familiar footsteps on the stairs. I don't bother to look.
"Come to borrow my basement to sand a boat in frustration?"
"Not today, Gibbs." She walks towards me. She's dressed nicely but despite havin' her hair done she still looks like she's been run through the mill but she seems . . . I guess you could say at peace. She walks up to me, takes the sander out of my hand and places it on the bench. She takes both my hands in hers, getting my full attention.
"I just wanted to stop by to say thank you." She leans in on her tiptoes and kisses one cheek then the other. I cannot stop the memories of Kelly's sweet pecks on my cheek before I left her for the last time. I drop Ziva's hands and embrace her, kissing her head, so relieved that I had made the right choice, and we find ourselves, in our unconventional father and daughter roles that are becoming less awkward.
I rest my chin on her hair, "You okay?"
"Yes, I am, and I do believe I mean it this time." I pull away, look her in the eyes and I see the truth of it.
"Good." I go to reach for my sander and she stops my hand.
"But just in case you are not certain, I wanted to give you this." She pulls out a key to her apartment. Never before had she given one to me. I always respected her dual role with Mossad and as much as I didn't like her serving two masters, that was her position. She kept secrets, some out of duty, some out of choice, but this little key . . . this tells me that she is making herself permanent, open to me, the team, her true family. I'd adopted her years ago, but today she formally is adopting me. I feel like I can let out a breath that I've been holding in for years.
I smile, teeth and all, and nod. I put it in my pocket then ask, "So, where's your shadow?"
"Oh, I gave him the day off."
She hands me my sander, grabs another one for herself and she starts to sand with the grain.