Kurama plays the role of a living encyclopedia, the group shows off their atrocious table manners and there's tons of random pervyness. You've been warned.
Standard Disclaimer: If I owned Yu Yu, they would have way more random conversations.
After getting his final autograph from Juri, the ex-detective put the photo away and looked at the time. Excusing himself to go cook dinner he promised he would help build when he came back after he closed his business in the city.
"Be sure you guys come up to the temple in about an hour. I should have everything ready to eat by then." Looking to Ruka and then Juri who had come to join the enchantress on the porch, he added. "I guess you can come too if you want, since Kido and those guys won't be there tonight."
The red headed female raised an eyebrow, "My, Yusuke, actually being polite? Seems like you might have matured a little bit."
He gave her an evilly mischievous smirk, "Who said I was being polite? I was gonna give you some of the 'special' batch of food I'm making for the old lady."
She and Juri looked at him warily and declined the offer, not wanting to be submitted to the same treatment the rebel was planning for the elderly Genkai. They'd likely hear all about whatever it was from their gossiping companion Botan tomorrow.
After he left, the guys decided to get some more work done and the girls excused themselves back to the house they shared with Koto, intent on joining her in singing karaoke to her new music.
Yusuke was almost done cooking in Genkai's kitchen when everyone slowly started to make their way to the dining area.
As usual, Botan and Keiko came in to help him finish up and bring the food out to everyone. "What are we eating tonight Yusuke?" asked the former ferry girl.
"Yakisoba with everyone's favorite fixings. And before you ask- yes, I put sweet and sour sauce in yours, you weirdo."
She giggled happily and danced a little in place. "You're the best!"
Helping serve the food to who it belonged to was always easy, since they had so many people, Rinku thought up a while ago to use colored plates for everyone. Botan's plate being pink, she went straight over to it and started to pull out a noodle before Yusuke smacked the back of her hand. "You can wait a few more minutes to eat like the rest of us."
She stuck her tongue out at him and pouted before grabbing a few plates to bring out to their owners.
When she came out with the two dishes in her hand she saw that most of the usual diners were already there. The Kuwabaras, the demon boys, Genkai, Yukina, with Kurama and Koenma just walking in the door, then there was of course Yusuke, Keiko and herself. She had spoken with Kaito, Kido and Yanagisawa earlier that day. They had told her they planned on going for a night out this Saturday evening instead of joining the weekly group meal.
Jin thanked her as she handed him his white plate right after she handed Suzuka his rainbow colored one. He looked at what kind of food it was, happy to see that it was his favorite human food, beef yakisoba. He popped a piece of beef in his mouth and smiled, 'cows taste much better than any creature I ever had ta be huntin' in Makai.'
As Yusuke and the girls sat down he pointed out to the young chef, "Oi, Ura-Yusuke" He corrected himself, "Ya know ya gonna be disappointing all the humans who come to eat yer food when ya pack up the old shop."
As the young demon lord replied, Jin saw out of the corner of his eye that Genkai and Kurama noticed the sudden name change, "well they'll just have to deal with it. I'd rather cook for my friends than some thankless strangers any day."
This once again started the topic of the afternoon with his fox friend asking him, "You're planning on closing your ramen stand?"
The brunette shrugged, "Yes and no. I'm going to move my stand up here and quit the other business. I'm sick and tired of spending half my time getting autographs and having you help me solve stupid school pranks. Genkai's gonna let me stay at her place here." The detective was suddenly smacked by regret, remembering what he'd done to the old psychic's food. He started making back up plans for places to stay in the back of his mind, 'Maybe she won't notice.. yeah right of course sh-'
His thoughts were interrupted by the inevitable question, "Yusuke, what did you put in my food?" Genkai, as well as half the dinner guests looked to him.
'Well so much for that, I never was one for thinking ahead.' "Um, quite a bit of something from the Americas called Tabasco sauce."
She nodded at him, "It actually tastes pretty good. I think your cooking is the only thing you don't do half-ass." It seemed she wasn't bothered in the least by the huge quantity of hot pepper juice in her food and no one else seemed to know what Tabasco sauce was.
The detective's eyes nearly popped out of his head but he could only nod back, 'now I have another weird dish I have to make when I cook. Oh well, I guess it's better than getting kicked out before I even live here.'
Botan got his attention from across the table, "Hey, guess what Yusuke? When Keiko and I were teaching our demon students about the human and spirit worlds today we learned something new about demons!" She said cheerily. Beside her, Keiko dropped her chopsticks, her face turned red and she stared down at her food.
Before she had a chance to avert the conversation, the blue haired girl continued on, "We learned that most demons don't really have a gender preference since they're usually attracted to strength rather than appearances" she blurted out. "I guess no preference makes them sorta like some of the races in Rekai."
Keiko's shade of red darkened and she turned to her friend, "I didn't know that!"
"Huh? Oh I guess I never mentioned it to you before" she mused aloud. "Well since most of the beings that live in Reikai can't have children like humans and demons can, the only real reason for a relationship is for close company." She shrugged. "The Spirit Realm is a land of the dead after all, and many there only have spirit forms and no access to a physical body to possess."
Kurama decided to add his wisdom to the conversation, "Well for demons, it really depends on the race, and their individual personality. True, most are attracted to strength over appearance but some races have a usual preferences or none at all, such as the koorime race. Since they reproduce asexually and live among only women, they typically either have no interest in either gender at all or only the other females of their village. Though there are those that, based on their personality, find an interest in men as well." He turned to the ice maiden, "Am I correct in this Yukina?"
She nodded in agreement, "yes, that's right."
The younger Kuwabara's face turned red and he glanced at the little koorime, "so um, does that mean you've like, had a girlfriend or something before?"
The ice maiden blushed but smiled cutely, "I'm 73 years old Kazuma. I lived in the ice village most of that time before I left."
Yusuke gave the human a dirty grin, "Uh oh, sounds to me like Kuwabara has something new to fantasize about at night."
"Shut up Urameshi! I'm a gentleman. I don't have a gutter mind like you do."
The demon lord joked, "Yeah right, you're a teenaged guy. Even monks think dirty thoughts. Trust me, I lived with a ton of them for like a year." He started laughing harder, "and if you ever come to visit Raizen's old fortress and hear weird things from Hokushin's room, don't go see what all the noise is about. He can stretch his neck really far you know."
Kuwabara looked horrified, "That's way more information than I ever wanted to know about that guy Urameshi!" Yusuke only laughed harder at the look on his friend's face.
Kurama interrupted them before they could get into anymore perverted banter, "Yes, as I was saying... since most demon races live for thousands of years, granted that no outside source kills them, such as starvation or fatal injury, there's no pressing need for offspring to be born constantly. Even in the event that a demoness conceives, there's no guarantee that it will be born. Since many females are fighters, miscarriages happen more often than not. Even after a child is born it could be eaten or killed by other demons." he concluded.
Listening to his explanation, Botan and Keiko looked upset, "that's horrible!"
The red head nodded solemnly, "Yes, but that is the nature of the demon realm I'm afraid. But I seem to have gotten a bit off topic. The original point is that with incredibly long lifespans, demons don't really need to repopulate that often, and as a result there are no taboos about same sex relationships as there are here in Ningenkai. So a demon will usually find a partner with the qualities they seek regardless of gender."
Kuwabara thought about this new information, "Wow, I guess it's true what they say about learning something new everyday."
Chuu took a turn to speak up at this point, "Aye that be true for most demons," he reached his hands out in front of him to grab something imaginary while he made a dopey grin, "but I like the melons on sheilas too much to bother with anythin' else."
This earned him a smack in the back of the head by Rinku. "How many times do I have to tell you to behave? You're gonna get us kicked out you dummy!"
Kurama smiled exasperatedly, "Yes, well, female anatomy is clearly a trait high on your list when seeking a companion."
There was mixed reactions to Chuu's crude statement when Yusuke noticed something about the teen sized godling for the first time, "Hey Koenma, where's your pacifier?"
The golden eyed death god sighed, "My Mafuukan, Yusuke, and I got tired of everybody bothering me about it since I'm in my mature form almost all the time now. I transferred over the power I'd collected these last few years since that battle with Sensui to something a little more appropriate for this body." He pulled out a necklace from under his robes to show his former employee. The pendant glowed an eery blue light.
"How does a necklace go better with a teen guy's body than a pacifier?"
Annoyed the godling answered, "well the other idea I had was a tongue piercing but I figured I needed to be able to use the powers on a moments notice."
The detective nearly choked on his food, "A tongue ring?" He laughed, "Jeez Koenma, I never thought you'd have it in you for something like that."
The other merely shrugged and continued eating, "Now that I'm in charge, got more employees in the office and I don't have to spend every waking hour stamping papers, Botan and I have been looking more into recent human culture as well. I don't know if she showed you the belly button ring she got yesterday or not."
His head whipped around to the pink eyed girl, "I gotta see this! Botan you should take your top off right now and show us all." He gave her a perverted grin before he got a chopstick thrown at his head by Keiko on the other side of the table.
"Yusuke stop being a perv!"
"Yes, I hardly need to remove my entire shirt for you to look at my new jewelry. I showed the girls earlier and they could see it just fine by me lifting up my top a little." The Reikai girl stuck her nose up and turned away from him.
"Hey I had to try," He shrugged and tossed the human girl's chopstick back at her. He smiled wickedly, deciding to continue her embarrassment from before, "So Keiko, how's things with that guy you got a crush on? Whats-his-face?"
She crossed her arms, blushing like mad but confidently stating, "His name is Nobuo, and we have a study date on Wednesday."
On the other end of the table Jin had to catch his eating utensils before he completely dropped them on the floor. Up to this point he had been engaging in a conversation with Touya about the disadvantages of human footwear while trying to walk stealthily, all the while keeping some of his attention centered on the conversations surrounding the toushin.
He was about to ask why she was seeing someone else if she was with the detective, but it turned out he wasn't the only one listening in on the discussion, because Suzuka beat him to it.
"What's this Yusuke? I thought the two of you were an item?"
The demon lord and the teen girl looked over at the six demons on the other end of the table who had all abruptly stopped their own conversations. Now they were all watching the ex-detective intently, waiting for the answer to the question that was suddenly on all of their minds.
"What? Well me and Keiko have been best friends forever and we tried a relationship for a while after I came back from the Makai tournament. But now that I have a demon's lifespan we thought it would be best if we just stayed friends." He looked slightly saddened.
Keiko added to this, a bit disheartened herself "we decided that neither of us wanted the heartache in a few decades when I started to age and he stayed forever young. It was a hard decision, but it really will be best for both of us." She started to look a little teary eyed when Botan put her arm around the other girl and pulled her into a half hug from where she sat next to her.
The demon youth suddenly perked up, intent on lightening the mood, "that's like really old news guys." He turned to the former ferry girl, "It sounds like you're not doing your hobby of gossiping very well these days."
Eager to change the subject herself she jumped on the defense, "Well excuse me, but I can't keep track of everyone you know. I already told Genkai, Kurama, Yukina, Kaito, Kido," She was ticking off the fingers of her left hand and had to start over again, "Yana, Ruka, Juri, Koto, Shizuru, Koenma, Ayame, George, Kuwab-"
"Ok ok I get it! You can shut up now" He threw up his hands to emphasize that he wanted her to stop her babbling. "I think everyone knows you're a blabbermouth, you don't have to go into detail. Though if you told that many people and the guys still didn't hear about it, I guess that means you're the only one who ever spreads anything."
She harrumphed and before the girl could go on another rant of some kind, Kurama stood with his empty plate, offering to take anyone else's on his way to the kitchen and asking Botan if she would care to help him do the dishes.
As dinner was finished up and everyone started into the usual Saturday night routine of drinking, playing video games and whatever else, Yusuke waved goodbye to them, saying he needed to get back to his stand to give his last customer the much hated autographs.
He promised to come back as soon as he could, telling them he didn't think it would take him that long to move his meager belongings to the temple.
As he left and started to head out into the evening he felt a breeze from behind him, much like when he came up those very same steps earlier that day.
"Hey Jin. What's up?" He turned around to face the wind master.
The red head smiled as he floated in midair before the detective, "Oi, I be figurin' ya might be needin' a hand moving yer belongin's an it bein' dark I thou' maybe I could go with ya to this human city o' yours." He crossed his arms and stuck out his bottom lip slightly, "I been nuthin' but overly happy these days so me ears give me away as not bein human. So we figure it best that I didn'a go with Touya and the others when they went las' week in the daylight. Visitin' the city, Rinku said me ears'd be so pointy and wiggly tha' i'd probably be able to fly with jus' 'em."
Yusuke laughed, "Well he'd probably be right. You'll probably poke someone's eye out with those ears of yours someday." He patted the wind tamer's shoulder. "Cheer up man, I don't think it'll take too long for knowledge of demons to be the norm and you can go out as much as you want, even when you're ridiculously happy. Besides, I bet Touya, Chuu and Shishi got accused for being punk rocker wanna-be's by strangers, with their blue hair and all."
The red head grinned and started laughing, "Aye, when they came back, Shishi 'twere bitching something fierce about an old woman smacking 'im with her bag when he walked a wee bit too close to her."
They both burst out laughing, each envisioning the pretty boy imp being smacked by an old woman while he tried his best not to snap and kill her.
When they calmed down, the mazoku started to walk, waving to his friend to follow him. "Well come on then, lets go." He looked at his watch, "It's a few hours to drive back, so we should start running since that guy said he'd show up again about an hour and a half from now."
The horned demon's ears perked up, "Oi, how 'bout a race then?"
The brunette stopped and turned to his friend, with a huge smile on his face, "Now that's what I'm talking about. Some competition." He leaned in and poked the wind master in his chest, "But no flying! It's not a very even match if you can go straight over trees and I'm stuck following the winding roads around here."
The red head's ears started to wiggle, "Aye, It's a deal, Yusuke." He smiled at the youth, "It'd been long before you been born that I had meself a good ol' fashion foot race."
The demon lord smugly grinned, "yeah, yeah, rub it in my face that you've had centuries more fights and competition than me, but that'll only make it hurt your pride even more when I win." His smile changed to a mischievous one, "Though I suppose you can have an excuse when I beat you since I'll-get-a-head-start." He quickly finished as he bolted off, already at the bottom of Genkai's long flight of stairs by the time Jin realized their race had started.
As soon as he noticed, he took off after the detective, at a surprisingly fast speed for a demon who hadn't needed to do much running in decades. However, he had a goal in mind that he wanted to accomplish and it didn't really have anything to do with winning this race.
AN
As far as Yukina's age goes, I figure she (and consequently Hiei) could be anywhere between the ages of like 16 and 99 since ice maiden's have a child every one hundredth year and as far as we know, Yukina's never had any kids. But I figured that they had to be much older than they appear because of Hiei's very eventful life and the fact that he's actually pretty wise past all of his personality quirks. So I just picked a number that sounded good :P
Oh and don't worry about that random guy Keiko was talking about. I swear he won't show up or anything, I just needed a conversation starter so I could explain Keiko and Yusuke's current status.
Please review!