Tea?

The kitchen seemed to be deserted as Baxter filled the teapot with scalding hot water. Thomas stared at his hands, on the verge of tears. Vulnerability was something new to him. When afraid or upset he lashed out - created pain and torment for others as a way of preserving his own peace. It hasn't worked. Cutting his wrists in the bath hadn't even worked. He felt a failure in every sense of the word.

"Thomas?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"Two reasons. Firstly I wanted a drink of tea. Secondly and most importantly I believed us to be friends."

"I don't deserve a friend."

"That, Thomas Barrow is not for you to decide." She smiled at him. "And, for your information I am more than able to choose who I befriend."

Thomas shrugged.

"I'm trying my best to be a better man."

"You are." Phyllis Baxter sat next to him. "You are a different man to the one I met. Thomas, I think for the first time we are seeing the real you. What you did for Alice earlier, for the children was lovely."

"I cannot abide cruelty to children. It's evil. Pure evil the things Miss Marigold and Miss Sybil were being called." He sipped his tea. Phyllis nodded.

"Yes. But you didn't have to step in."

"I did."

Phyllis smiled. She had no idea why the young butler hated himself. Times had changed, people were more accepting now the War was over. There was still prejudice in the world but she knew most people kept to their own business.

"I'm an aberration."

"Tell me. What makes you that? Because I don't see it."

"I."

"Explain."

"You are being courted by Mr Mosely? Yes? Anna and Mr Bates courted. I've no interest in courting a lady,"

"Nothing wrong with that."

"I know. But I've never wanted to and I know I never shall. The way you feel regards Mr Mosely is the way I regard men. Not him."

"No, not him." She held his hand. "You told me you're in love with a man. That you have feelings that you don't think would be reciprocated?"

"Yeah." He looked away. "It's abnormal."

"Why? Because some pompous fool took the moral high ground a million years ago and decreed it?"

"The Bible."

"My Bible only talks about love, not hate. It's not my place to judge. Not anyone else either."

"Its illegal."

"The law is stupid. You're homosexual. That's all. While I can see the law makes it difficult I don't see why they have to find out. It's not a crime to love."

Thomas blinked back tears. Before she knew it Baxter was on her feet, holding him to her as he sobbed.

"You're a good man, Thomas." She held him tightly. "Hush now." She soothed as he wrapped his arms around her waist and cried.

Xxxx