Insert your disclaimer, I don't own the characters, the background plot, or anything that would provide me profit.

EPOV

I was sitting alone at home, quiet even for myself. I kept thinking of the word "doorknob" and how Bella had cried it out. How could a doorknob turn her on? Who was Lester? My hand clenched, and the arm rest snapped. Damn, I will have to fix it tomorrow.

I did not want to ask anyone about this. I hated hearing thoughts of pity, or mockery on these issues. I knew they would feel one of those towards me. Carlisle says I can control myself, but I know he is overestimating my abilities. No one wanted their negative thoughts to crop up, and they were immediately subdued for lighter, more optimistic ideals. Yet, that awkward moment was painful to all.

I walked to my room, and the memory of Bella's first groan hit. It was the night of her Wizard of Oz dream. I put on some music, a CD of Tchaikovsky. His music was immersed in passion, but had the ability to soothe my tainted mind. I flopped down with as little grace as an immortal could possess, my hand automatically heading to clench the bridge of my nose. Tonight, however, the emotions would not fade. I could not help myself this time.

The magazine Emmett gave me as a gag gift last year was my secret stash. It was my unholy savior for nights such as these. I was addicted to the images. I flipped to my favourite page. A woman was on her hands and knees, with a gag in her mouth and a scarf covering her eyes. A man was behind her, pulling at her hair, causing her back to bow and her breasts to jut outward while he penetrated her. I became completely erect. My vision blurred with a mental picture as I unzipped my jeans. The woman in the magazine became Bella, and the male transformed into myself.

"Isabella," I would use her full name, "I hope you remember the rules. You will not come until I give you my permission." My language would be perverse, and I would yank on her hair to signify permission to respond. Being gagged, she would only moan and nod her head slightly. I would pull harder.

"What was that, Isabella?"

"Yes, Master," she would give a muffled reply . In the image, my hand would relax, but in reality, its grip strengthened.

I saw my hand trail down her back, only to massage her ass. It would then slip forward, and circle her clitoris with my thumbnail.

"My little Isabella, should I touch you softly tonight? Or," the fingernail snaps her, "should I strike you so hard you will be unable to walk?" The nail causes my envisioned Isabella to cry out. That is when I would un-gag her. I would want to hear those cries. I can see her panting as I move both hands to grasp her hips. She begins to moan and sob with need as I thrust into her.

"Master, may I come?" She begs. I slap her ass.

"Say please."

"Please, Master? Please, please, please!" She can barely talk now.

"No, not yet," I say, and snap her clitoris again. Her body would be so tense from need, it would be quivering. I would thrust in harder, move one hand back to her hair, and use the other to slap her ass again.

"Now! Come for me now!" I order. Her orgasm would be so intense, it elicits a scream. I pull out, then flip her over. I see yanking her head up, and she opens her mouth without being told.

"Good girl Isabella. You will be rewarded, and you will receive a bigger reward if you swallow tonight." She takes me deep, so deep I can feel her soft palate. Her throat constricts, and I release. She would swallow, and then lick me clean.

"Thank you, Master." She says with a smile. I will kiss her forehead lightly, and wipe the sweat from her brow.

My eyes snapped open, and I glared at the white liquid seeping. After cleaning up, the guilt began.

Why? Why did I have such horrid thoughts? I could not, would not do anything like that to Bella. She deserved respect, not to be used like a mere blow-up doll.

I wished she could be with someone unlike me. I used being a vampire as an excuse for suggesting she could do better. In actuality, it was the sick and twisted lust I felt for her that made me an invalid to her.

Yet, she still refused to leave me. All I could do is be the best I could be, and ignore these evil thoughts. Until then, I would use this magazine like morphine. It would remain under the couch, being a shield for Bella.

Bella-- it would be time for me to go over. Something in my mind filled with caution. I knew she was up to something. The little minx would rub me again in the wrong, but satisfying ways. She tried night after night to begin some intimacy; if only I could get her to stop. I envisioned being able to spank her, the thought of her pale flesh turning pink, the music of her voice crying out, and the desire streaming through my stolen blood--

No, no, no!

I grabbed for my phone, hit a button, and waited for the ring.

"Hello," her sultry voice greeted me.

"Helli, Bella. I cannot come over tonight. I need to hunt." I tried to suppress the unease in my voice.

"Babe, what's wrong?" Her voice had concern.

"I just really need food." I needed other things too. I could tell she was upset. "Look love, please do not wait up for me. I shall be over later if I can catch and clean up before Charlie wakes. If not, I will make it up to you." I heard a sigh.

"It's fine. Don't worry about it Edward." She sounded broken. I had to make it up for her quickly. Before thinking, I blurted something out.

"Don't yell 'doorknob' at Charlie again. I think it confused him." She laughed, and I heard other laughs with her. She was with Alice and Rosalie still? I hope they could help her out.

"Yes sir!" She replied. Her calling me "sir" was all I needed to become aroused again. We exchanged farewells, and I chucked the phone onto the bed.

Please let there be a mountain lion out tonight.