Derek slept through most of Sunday. The return to championship level hockey yesterday, plus the nervous energy of seeing Casey again, added to the unexpected sprint across the hotel lawns (only slightly ahead of a rabid Rottweiler) making him more than a little sleepy. He woke at 3pm to the sound of his phone ringing.

"Yes?" He answered, groggily.

"What the hell's the matter with you?" Tim, his agent asked.

"Late night and a hockey game." Derek yawned. "What time is it?"

"Time you got up."

"Why? It's Sunday. If I want to spend all day in bed I will." He objected.
"What time did you get in last night?"

"Erm 5?" Derek squinted at the clock as though the answer was there.

"Am or Pm?"
"Am. I think. It was still dark but only just."

"What was her name?"
"Sorry?"

"Who kept you up till the early hours?"
Derek paused. "You want the truth or the lies?"
"Oh god…this is another PR disaster isn't it?"
His client laughed. "No. I was at the 'Stars with Hearts' show."

"That finished at 9.30, D."
"I had to see a man about a dog."

"That "dog" wouldn't be your ex-wife, now would it?"
"Timothy! Did you just call Chloe a bitch? Shame on you."

"What? No…it's an expression…I…"

"Don't sweat it, Tim. I agree with you. I'm thinking of having her neutered."

"You might want to consider having her put down." Tim corrected. "Especially when you hear about tonight's edition of 'Green Light'." He said the name of the entertainment programme with distaste.

"Oh…this wouldn't have anything to do with a certain accusation about Casey would it?"
"You know?" Tim's tone was accusatory.

"Casey told me."

"When did you see Casey?" Derek could hear the curled eyebrow.

"After the show."

"She was your 5am wasn't she?"

"Not how you think. We sat up talking most of the night. We were mending fences, building bridges. Repairing our friendship."

"Playing tonsil tennis."

"No." Derek ran his hand through his hair. "How bad is it?" He switched attention back to the gossip programme.

"Oh it's bad. I tell you, that woman has a serious screw loose."

"Casey? She's fine really. You just have to get to know her."
Tim chuckled. "I meant your ex-wife, Derek. She's a real piece of work."

"What does she say?"

"You might want to give your family a call and warn them about the shit storm that's about to hit…and we need to talk about your response."
"My response?"

"Oh yeah. They are definitely going to want to hear your side of the story."
"How long have I got to warn the family?"
"It goes out at about 8pm."

Derek took a deep breath. "Tell me the details and I'll decide how to handle this."

So Tim ran through the transcript that the producers of "Green Light" had faxed him for Derek's official comment. When he had finished, Derek sighed.

"I'm getting out of bed as we speak. I'll go and see them in person."

Derek showered and dressed, and then left for London. On the way, he dialled Casey's number on his car phone and tapped nervously on the steering wheel until she answered.

"Hi!" She greeted him cheerily.

"Hi princess!" he replied equally cheerily.

"What's wrong?" She snapped back.

"Why does something have to be wrong? Can't I phone my AG for a chat when I feel like it?"

"What's an AG?" Casey asked.

"Almost girlfriend." Derek enlightened her. "AG is less of a mouthful." He paused. "Go out with me."

She laughed. "No. Next…"

"Casey." He whined …and then Derek's voice became serious. "We got a bit of a problem."

"What have you done now?"

"Why does this have to be me?" he protested, and then realised he did share a large part of the blame. He shut up.

"Go on. Tell me. I can handle it."
"Chloe-announced-on-tv-that-you-had-a-crush-on-me-and-that-we-slept-together." Derek spoke without a pause between the words.

"She did what?" Casey had been interpreting Derek mumbles for a decade and a half. She understood him first time. "How the hell did she know?"
Derek coughed. "Technically, I might have told her." He admitted.

There was a silence.

"Casey?" Derek asked, wondering if the call had disconnected. Then he heard her shuffling and knew it was just that she wasn't speaking.

"Hang on. I'm going to pull over." He said, flicking the turn signal on and pulling to the side of the road.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." He said when the car was stationary. "She just wound me up and it slipped out."
There was another long pause.

"Princess, say something." He pleaded.

"Derek. I need to know, okay? Is this a big joke to you? A 'get one over on the woman who married me bigamously' sort of joke…the kind where your long-suffering best friend conveniently helps you out?"

"No! Don't freak out about this, please. I can't lose you again." He pleaded.

In her room in the hotel, Casey closed her eyes against the threatening tears his words provoked.

"I can't lose you either." She murmured.

"We'll deal with this, love." He promised. "Together. AG or no AG. We're a team."

"What exactly did she say?"

Interviewer: So Chloe…how does it feel to be roomies with your ex-sister-in-law?

Chloe: Okay, I suppose. We muddle along.

Interviewer: I gather that despite the fact you were married to Derek for two years, you had only met his sister once before.

Chloe nods.

Interviewer: Why is that?

Chloe: Casey has always been a little…unconventional and also rather attached to Derek. She relied on him heavily in college and then when they both graduated he continued to be her grounding point. Casey found it difficult to adjust to him having a life of his own. She was always turning up at his house.

When we met and fell in love she didn't like it. She never came to our wedding, just sent us a tasteless, cheap vase. ["It wasn't CHEAP or tasteless!" Casey interjected.] For a while we saw nothing of her, and then I discovered that she had started breaking into our home and routing through his things. I had to have the locks changed.

Interviewer: That's quite disturbing. What does Derek think of all this?

Chloe: He's a saint. He puts up with so much from her. He's given her so much money, arranged for her to have a life. Some of it was from a sense of guilt but the rest is purely from the goodness of his heart.

Interviewer: Guilt?

Chloe: He once confessed to me that in a mad moment, during a low point in his life, while he was high on alcohol and who knows what else, he…erm…slept with her. It was a sympathy fu…

Interviewer:…erm yes, well…erm. Hang on. You're saying that Derek Venturi slept with his sister?

Chloe: Yes.

Casey gasped.

"Don't freak, Casey. It's crap. You know it, I know it, hell even the interviewer probably knows it."

"She just branded you a freak."

"No. She branded you a freak. She branded me an alcoholic and a dope fiend who takes advantage of his mentally disturbed sibling."

"She hit the nail on the head then, didn't she?" Casey joked.

"Wow! You just joked about it."

"I know. Weird huh? I guess knowing that it isn't going to stop us being friends is enough. Right?" She needed reassurance.
"Definitely."

"I mean if the family already know then…oh shit! The family! Derek, whether they know or not they can't hear it from the television!"

"I'm in the car on my way to London now." He reassured her.

"Okay."

"Casey. I talked to Tim. We've agreed a strategy for my response."

"Which is?"

"I'm going to be flippant. Please don't take offence at anything I say."

"That bad?" Casey asked but he could hear the chuckle in her words." It was just another reason why he loved her.

"Go out with me, Casey."

"No."
"Not even as a friend?"
Casey smiled. "We'll talk about friend-dates when I get out of this place. I tell you, even if sleeping with your step-sibling was an indictable offence, I've done my custodial sentence and hard labour."

"I think it's called taking one for the team. My turn comes now, because I've got to deal with the crap on the outside."

"How about I throw you a rope over the perimeter wall and you can sneak in?"

"Interesting. You liked last night then? I'll wangle an invite to this weekend's show too. We'll do a repeat. Same time, same place?"

"Being chased across the lawn by the canine equivalent of Chloe wasn't enough for you?"
"You're totally worth it." He confessed.

"You're totally insane." She giggled.
"Same time? Same place?" He asked softly.

Casey sighed. "Please. Just try and come up with another escape route before Romeo ends up with a massive bite in his hose."

"Mr Venturi. What do you say to Miss Prescott's allegation that your sister has a crush on you?"

Derek smirked. "Can you blame her?"

The reporter blushed.

"Derek is it true she used to break into your house?" Another press-man asked.

"Casey has a key to my house. She was with me when I decided to buy it. She doesn't need to break in. She has always been welcome in my home."

A particularly gross specimen of tabloid reporter scratched an armpit as he raised his hand in question.

"Did you fuck her?"
Derek looked at him, hard and cold. "No. I didn't." He retorted. "And if you ever talk about my best friend like that again I will make a complaint to the Press Association and have your credentials revoked." Derek's tone made it clear in what form the revocation would take.

"Are you and your wife going to be working for a reconciliation?" another more amenable reporter asked.

Derek chuckled. "Sure…just as soon as I get married." He beamed. "I don't have a wife. You may have read, Chloe Prescott is still married to Mr Prescott. I hope they will be very happy together."

"So rumours of a romance between you and your sister…"
"Look. Casey McDonald is my step-sister, not my sister. It would help everyone if they just remembered that fact. She is also my best friend. I enjoy spending time with her, especially if she cooks…you should try her food sometime…it's to die for and totally the reason why women should be in the kitchen. However, we aren't dating and there are no plans at this moment in time to change that. So what you basically have is a non-story about two normal people who just happen to be really good friends, and one not-so-normal person who seriously needs to get a life. And just for the avoidance of doubt, that last bit wasn't about Casey, who's weird, but in a totally acceptable and completely non-stalker-like way…which is more than can be said for the model-formerly-known-as-Mrs Venturi."

He grinned at them. "You realise I now have two very angry women after me?" He joked. "Casey will never forgive me for the kitchen comment…and Chloe…is just Chloe."

"Who will you be voting for in the competition?" One brave soul asked.

Derek turned to face him. "The best singer and the best dancer."

"Which is?"

"Boys and girls…come on! I'm sure you are more than capable of working that one out for yourselves. Open your eyes."

"Mr Venturi?" A tiny girl called, and Derek turned to look at her.

She smiled weakly. "Athena Evans, Sir John Sparrow Thompson High Gazette. How do you feel about your hockey performance yesterday?"
Derek smiled a genuine smile for the girl who was so normal beside all the vultures.

"I'm very proud of my performance. It was the real me. I've had enough of unrealistic expectations and false friends. I'm concentrating on the real world from now on. My life has been airbrushed enough."

"Do you have any words for the students at your old school?"
"Yeah. It was a lesson I learnt on day one at school and it has given me much pause for thought over the years…look before you pee. Because you never know who or what is in your line of fire. And it might just bounce right back and hit you in the face. Oh…and if Lassiter is still there…say hi from me!"

AN: Round 3 will be Golden Oldies. For those of you that picked Golden Oldies because they didn't know what MOBO was...it's Music of Black Origin: anything from Soul through RnB to Hip Hop...