Chapter 39
REGRETS
The next couple of days were spent inside the recording studios, polishing every angle until everyone is satisfied. Everyone worked to the wee hours of the morning, and when it was time to wrap, Aisha was the last one standing.
Like a horse being chased by the devil himself she seemed alert, keeping herself impossibly busy that even the others marveled at her.
Yesterday they had just finished the second to the last song. Tomorrow they will wax the final song: the one using the music by Xiao Qiao.
Oftentimes she had wondered if Xiao Qiao would come but repeatedly she dismissed the idea. If she were in Xiao Qiao's position, the last thing she would want to do is to see the girl who must have caused the postponement of her wedding.
It has been a long while. What could have happened to the wedding? Perhaps Mei Zuo changed his mind and it will still push through.
It brought a certain sadness to her, but under the circumstances, there is nothing she would want more than for that to happen. At least she would have some sort of peace if that happens. If.
She looked at herself in the mirror as the staff hired by Japan Airlines to oversee her pictorials fussed over her and around her.
Today they were at one of the hangars of Japan Airlines, set up for the pictorials. She looked at her outfit, an improvised pilot's uniform with the famous scarf of the flight attendants.
The morning went on quite smoothly. She had worked with the photographer once before so it was not difficult working with him. After a couple of costume changes and about five rolls of film wasted on each, they all decided to take a break and Aisha climbed into her trailer, provided by the airlines.
She was lying down on the small couch when she heard a knock on the trailer door.
"Who is it?" she asked. Yuki was out somewhere, speaking with the creative directors for the additional pictorials to be done later.
A lady's voice came on. "It's me, Jing."
Sucking in her breath, praying she would not blow it this time, she stood up and opened the door, smiling at Jing.
"Hi!" Jing greeted warmly, lifting a box of pizza and a couple of Pepsi cans. "I brought something!"
Aisha opened the door wider and Jing came in. "Yuki is busy outside so I figured I join you for some snack. You don't mind, do you?" she asked.
Aisha shook her head. "Of course not, but you didn't have to," she added, watching the other woman begin setting the food on top of the low counter.
Jing shook her head good-naturedly. "I don't mind. I am hungry myself and, after all that work you put in this morning, you deserve this. I brought pepperoni. Is that OK?"
Aisha carefully sat down on the other couch, across Jing. "It's fine," she reassured Jing.
Today the manager of Japan Airlines is dressed in a simple pair of navy blue trousers and a Chanel top. Compared to her, Aisha suddenly felt drab and plain in her jeans and light blue tee.
'Great, Aisha,' she thought wryly. 'Feel sorry for yourself!'
"You seem to be having fun," Jing observed, helping herself to a slice of pizza. "The photographers have nothing but praises for you." She smiled. "I don't remember them having that type of reaction when I was the one they were taking pictures of."
Aisha smiled. "I have worked with them before," she said, shrugging her shoulders.
"Still, you are quite the professional," Jing insisted. "I find it hard to believe that you've only been doing this for roughly three months!"
Her next words made Aisha instantly wary, trying to figure out if Jing was baiting her.
"Of course, I know some part of the credit goes to Hua Ze Lei."
Aisha bided her time before answering. "How so?" she asked.
"Why, Hua Ze Lei brings out the best in anyone," Jing said nonchalantly, although her alert eyes saw everything. "Doesn't he?"
Turning her eyes away, Aisha nodded. To her relief, Jing did not pursue the subject.
"How is your album coming along?" Jing asked. "I heard it would be released in a few weeks."
"Three weeks," she clarified, grateful that at least now they are on safer ground. "We still have one last song to record. Hopefully tomorrow it will all be done."
Jing nodded. "Give me a complimentary copy, alright?" she said with a wink. "By the way," she said, as though she just remembered something, "I remember hearing that you will be collaborating with Yin Xiao Qiao. Is that true?"
The 'safer ground' crumbled. Aisha cleared her throat. "Uhm, yes. She will be playing the cello."
"She is very good," Jing said. "I don't know her that well, actually, but she is the fiancee of Mei Zuo. You went to Taipei, right? And you attended their engagement party?"
Aisha nodded dumbly. "Yes," was all she could come up with.
Jing smiled. "The first time I heard Xiao Qiao play was during Dao Ming Si and Shancai's wedding in Madrid. She played the cello while Lei played the violin."
At the mention of Hua Ze Lei, the 'safer ground' opened up and swallowed her whole. "She plays very well, yes."
"So does Hua Ze Lei. Have you heard him play? He's amazing."
The crack in the ground closed, leaving her trapped. "I only managed to hear him play a few times."
"And what did you think?"
She tried to smile naturally. "As you said, he is amazing."
She could have jumped and hugged Yuki so hard when the trailer door opened and Yuki came in.
"Aisha, are you...?" She stopped when she saw there was another person in the trailer. She smiled at Jing.
"Am I interrupting anything?"
Jing laughed. "Oh, no. Aisha and I were just having pizza. Would you care to join us?"
For a moment, Yuki seemed about to refuse but she took one look at Aisha who was staring at her manager almost pleadingly, and she nodded.
"Sure," Yuki said, joining the two ladies. "I was about to call Aisha for some food, anyway."
With her eyes Aisha thanked Yuki, who merely nodded at her imperceptibly.
Silently Aisha went about consuming her food, letting Yuki and Jing carry on the conversation. Many times she could feel Jing's gaze upon her and she wondered if the other lady knew more than she is letting on.
Jing spoke about Mei Zuo and Xiao Qiao as though nothing happened. Maybe nothing did. Maybe the wedding will still push through as planned.
She hopes so.
Xi Men knocked on the door once, twice. He resisted the urge to bang on it with his fists. Tempers flying would not in any way help to alleviate this situation.
"Mei Zuo!" he called out. "Open up, it's Xi Men!"
When there was no reply from inside, he knocked again, harder this time.
"I know you're in there, Mei Zuo!" he said. He saw Mei Zuo's car in the building basement parking area, and the doorman told him Mei Zuo never left this morning.
If he had his way, Xi Men would have been here yesterday, but common sense told him it would not be good to be anywhere near Mei Zuo, especially after that scene he caused at Meteors.
Xi Men was about to knock again when the door opened and a haggard-looking Mei Zuo stood before him.
"Oh," Mei Zuo said flatly. "It's you."
"You didn't have to sound too thrilled to see me," Xi Men remarked wryly and walked in after his friend.
Quickly he took a look around, deciding this is quite an OK place for Mei Zuo. He turned to see his friend striding towards the bar counter.
"A drink?" Mei Zuo asked over his shoulder, reaching for a bottle of vodka.
"No, thanks," Xi Men said. "It's still too early for a drink, don't you think?"
"Oh, yeah, sorry," Mei Zuo said ruefully. "I forgot you have to refrain from drinking, what with your stomach."
Xi Men decided to get straight to the point. "Get your act together, Mei Zuo," he said. "“Last night was crazy. It should not have happened, you know."
Mei Zuo did not reply. He sat down on a stool and sipped from the glass.
Xi Men went on. "You cannot blame Dao Ming Si for seeing Lei. We were all worried about him when he was nowhere to be found for the past week. And do not say we were not thinking about you, because we are. But you made it clear from the start that you wanted to be left alone. Do not take this against A Si. And all those things you told him last night...you were unfair, Mei Zuo."
Xi Men knew he was walking a thin line with what he is doing. Any second now, he expects Mei Zuo to come at him, fists flying.
But Mei Zuo's reply was, to say the least, totally unexpected.
"I went overboard, I know."
Xi Men gaped at Mei Zuo, watching him as he strode to the couch and sank on it.
"You do?" he asked testily.
"I was just...too angry." Mei Zuo sighed. 'Where is A Si now?"
Xi Men sat down across Mei Zuo, and shrugged. "I don't know. At work, maybe. At least he is getting on with his life."
"Touche," Mei Zuo said with bitter laughter.
Xi Men sighed aloud. "I would hate to see the F4 now ruined. You saw what the thing with Shancai and Ah Si and Lei almost did to us. You know how that felt. I could not believe you are the one doing this now."
"And you think I planned this?" Mei Zuo demanded, turning his head to look at his friend with eyes so intense that others would cower. But not Xi Men.
"I know you didn't," Xi Men said, "but I thought you knew better than to just throw punches when you feel like it. Those were pretty harsh words you said last night, Mei Zuo."
"I know! You don't have to tell me every single time!" Mei Zuo got to his feet and wearily pushed his hair back from his face. He took a few deep breaths then spoke.
"Just give me time, Xi Men. When I'm cool, I would personally speak with A Si...but not yet. Not just yet."
The silence is deafening. It had always been his only friend. He had always sought solace and comfort in the arms of silence. But now it did not seem to work anymore.
Hua Ze Lei entered the music room a good ten minutes ago, but he did not seem to fully know it. It was only when the stark silence began to resound in his ears that he took a good look around and discovered he was alone.
His eyes fell on the Stradivarius standing on its shelf proudly, as though waiting for blessed hands to touch it.
Before he knew it he was striding towards the instrument and taking it carefully from its case. He lifted it to his chin and closed his eyes for a moment, as though praying for grace.
Then he lifted his other hand and let the melody drown him.
Aisha straightened, stretching her neck both ways, then lifting her hands high into the air. Ignoring the amused looks thrown her way by the staff, Aisha let her hands down and punched into the air.
So goes her ritual before a recording session. She could not explain it, but it sure hypes her up.
"Ready, Aisha?" Mark asked through the microphone, and she nodded in reply, reaching for the headphones and putting it on.
"Just like we rehearsed before, Aisha. This should be easy for you."
As the strains of the first few bars rang through the room, Aisha kept her gaze on the music sheet spread before her, filled with marks and notes made by her hand.
The first stanza went well, and the second...her voice soared and wove its way smoothly through the passages, injecting just the right ounce of emotion each word required.
It would have been perfect, had she not raised her eyes to look at Mark.
Then she saw her.
Xiao Qiao.
Instantly her voice left her and she forgot where she was, or what she was doing. She was just staring at Xiao Qiao.
And Xiao Qiao just stared back at her.
And slowly, she smiled at Aisha. A genuine smile.
Mark reached for the mic. "Aisha? What's wrong?" he asked, looking concerned.
Shaking herself, Aisha cleared her throat. "Water...please?" she asked in a small voice, and it was enough to send one of the utilities scurrying for a glass of water.
Aisha saw as Xiao Qiao tapped Mark on the shoulder and whispered something. As the utility entered the studio and handed her a tall glass of water, Aisha was careful to keep her eyes away from the window separating the studio from the outer room.
Xiao Qiao is here...? And she smiled at Aisha...what does that mean?
"Alright, Aisha. Let's do this again. From the top."
Although it was difficult to actually pretend that Xiao Qiao was not there, and although Aisha kept her eyes trained on the lyric sheet, she still knew Xiao Qiao remained with Mark.
After almost an hour came the moment she dreaded. Trying to keep a bright smile on her face, Aisha went out of the studio and into Mark's cubicle.
Mark grinned at her after giving her a warm hug. "We're all set," he said. "After a few more tweaks here and there, the real work begins for you."
"I can't wait," she said, feigning enthusiasm.
Mark turned to Xiao Qiao, who remained standing a few feet away. "Even Xiao Qiao thinks the song is perfect! Don't you?"
Aisha turned to see Xiao Qiao nod her head graciously, smiling. "Of course. I do not regret playing for it."
"Thanks," Aisha said gratefully. To her further discomfort, Mark said, "Excuse me a moment, ladies," and left to talk to one of the arrangers.
Slowly Aisha looked up to find Xiao Qiao regarding her intently. It was Xiao Qiao who broke the uncomfortable silence.
"How have you been?" she asked.
Aisha lifted her shoulders in a shrug. "Busy," she said casually. "You?"
"Not as busy as you have been," Xiao Qiao replied. When Aisha merely nodded slowly, she asked, "Are you not going to ask about the others?"
Aisha gave her a blank look.
Xiao Qiao smiled again, and Aisha wondered why she should be so nice to her when she should be getting mad.
"It is not your fault, Aisha," Xiao Qiao said softly. "I do not blame you. I don't know what the others have been saying, but take comfort in the fact that I still regard you as my friend."
Aisha stared at Xiao Qiao in awe. Then she shook her head in bitter amusement. "Thank you...I guess. For still calling me your friend. But I do not think I can do that."
"Why not?" Xiao Qiao asked. "Because you still love Mei Zuo?"
This made Aisha pause for a while. Then again she sadly shook her head. "Because I have done enough damage."
"What damage?" Mark asked, coming back. When neither replied, his gaze darted from Aisha to Xiao Qiao, then back to Aisha. "What did I miss?"
Aisha smiled at Mark. "I was just telling Ms. Xiao Qiao that I hope I did not do damage to her music." She gave a small bow. "Excuse me, but I need to go."
Without waiting for them to say anything, she turned on her heels and left the room, managing to breathe only when she was far away from the room.
Dao Ming Si cringed as Xi Men's elbow jabbed sharply into his side. "What!?" he demanded.
Xi Men was looking at something at the entrance of Meteors. "Look who's here," he whispered.
Curious, Dao Ming Si turned and saw Hua Ze Lei walking towards them, making his way through the crowd. Exchanging happy glances with Xi Men, both of them walked forward to meet their friend.
"Lei," Dao Ming Si tapped his friend on the shoulder and Hua Ze Lei gave him a small smile.
Xi Men put an arm around Hua Ze Lei's shoulders and pulled him towards the bar. "So you finally decided to dig yourself out of that hole you dug yourself into," he joked.
Hua Ze Lei accepted the drink offered by Dao Ming Si. The two of them exchanged quick looks and Dao Ming Si nodded, acknowledging the gratitude written all over Hua Ze Lei’s face.
Hua Ze Lei turned to Xi Men and said, "Admit it, Xi Men, you missed me."
Xi Men laughed aloud. "You wish!"
"I'm surprised you came here tonight," Dao Ming Si observed, knowing HUa Ze Lei is up to something.
"I came to say goodbye," Hua Ze Lei said, making the two turn to him in surprise. "I am leaving tomorrow. I am going back to Japan." He gave another meaningful look at Dao Ming Si, who again nodded in understanding.
"...and I want you two to see me off at the airport tomorrow morning."
This clearly caught Xi Men and Dao Ming Si off-guard. Xi Men literally choked on his beer and Dao Ming Si almost dropped his glass.
"What did you say?" Xi Men asked.
Hua Ze Lei smiled. "You heard me. I want the two of you to accompany me to the airport. Will you?"
Dao Ming Si and Xi Men's replies were loud whoops of laughter and tight hugs, drawing curious attention from everyone else.