Stupid Geniuses Ch 4
Wow is the only word I can use to describe how amazing reading the reviews for the last chapter! *eyes swirl with happiness* Ah~ You guys are amazing~ I love you all~
Likes to Smile: Dun-dun-DUN! OROCHIMARU! NOUZ! XD Yeah… he's going to be a really big part in this series, unlike in Stupidity. I know! I kinda live offa the stuff. ^^" It's really good, okay? *bows* Well, Tobi IS a good boy so that helps me write a little, just thinking about how cute he is when he wants to be. Ha~ I get it. Likes to Smile… Smiling. Tah~
Chibi Angel of the Uchiha: Tobi is a good boy, that doesn't mean that he knows how to use something so high-tech as a soda can. XD I'm glad that that chapter was cute~ I hope that the ones that are to come are as cute as that~
Looking back on that drive, I can't tell you what exactly the conversation was about. I'll tell you what I do remember though…
Orochimaru looks into the rearview mirror and chuckles. Kisame's hand tightens on my knee and Tobi is holding me so tightly it almost hurts.
"I think you know what I want, Kisame-kun, Tobi-kun," He says and licks his lips, not taking his eyes out of the mirror.
"No way in hell," Kisame says. Orochimaru chuckles and says something I can't understand. The next thing I remember is Kisame and Tobi standing over me. Tobi's fluttering around like a scared baby bird and Kisame is yelling obscenities at the retreating taxi. I slowly reach my hand to my forehead, feeling the skin under it pulsing in the frontal lobes of my brain.
D*mn… that's probably the most, I don't even know, doctorial thing I've ever said!
"'Mori-chan!" Tobi squeals and hugs me close, stroking my hair like I just had a near death experience. "'Mori-chan is okay, 'Mori-chan is okay," He says over and over, rocking me back and forth like I'm little. He sounds a little choked up.
Kisame slowly turns around and I can see the blood rush back to his face.
"Oh God, Kumori," He says and slides over to me, hand on the back of my neck and his face buried in my neck. Tobi backs off a little but takes my hand, petting it. "I was sure we'd lost you,"
"Hey, hey, hey," I say flapping my hands at the both of them to get them away so I can look them in the eye. "I have no idea what the hell you're talking about,"
"You died, Kumori," Kisame says softly. "Orochimaru killed you." The words hit me like a b*tch slap of truth to the face.
"What?" The words float out of my mouth before I can even think about the meaning that they'll have.
"You were dead for fifteen seconds," He says rubbing his eyes, but if it's from being tired or from trying to hide tears I can't tell. "Orochimaru killed you to prove that he wasn't messing around with us." His hand falls away from his eyes and I see they're slightly red-rimmed. My heart is pounding and I can't tell which way is up.
"I was…dead?" The last word comes out as a squeak. He nods slowly, his eyes searching my face for some kind of clue as to what I'm thinking. I don't know, to be totally honest. I have no idea what to think. Tears fill my eyes but I push them away and there's a pulse.
Fear.
Pure, unbridled fear pulses through me and I start shaking. I don't really know what's going on next, but I blink and I'm in Kisame's arms. He's saying something to Tobi, but it goes in one ear and out the other. I'm still shaking. That's all I know. I blink again and I'm back at my house, sitting on the couch. A blanket is wrapped around my shoulders and most of the Akatsuki is crowded around me. Most being Deidara, Kisame, Hidan, and Tobi. They're all talking really quickly and I close my eyes slowly before opening them again.
"Hold on," I say, surprised at how weird my voice sounds. "Just…Just shh for a sec, okay?" I close my eyes, putting my thumbs over my pupils and rubbing them slowly. When I open my eyes again, they're staring at me intently as I take in a deep breath, sighing. "I'm okay,"
"No you're not, you're still shaking, yeah," Deidara says kneeling down in front of me so I have to look at him.
"You're shaking like a godd*mn leaf," Hidan agrees and gets up to get me a cup of tea.
"I-I'm okay," I say again, trying to focus on not shaking. It works and I take a few deep breaths before I calm down. Forcing a smile, I look around at the worried men near me. "I just don't die often," My rough attempt at a joke fails epically and I sigh, hanging my head a little before bringing it back up to see a cup of tea being shoved at me.
"Huh?" I look up to see Hidan shoving the mug towards me, looking away with an almost invisible blush.
"Here. Sorry if I f*cked it up," He mumbles not looking me in the eye. Our fingers brush as I take the mug, relishing the heat coming off of it.
"Thank you," I say with a huge smile before taking a sip. My eyes are huge. It's sooooo good! I close my eyes happily; just letting the steam hit my face. It feels amazing and I take another sip of tea, licking my lips. I open my eyes and blink in confusion.
The five aforementioned Akatsuki are staring at me like I'm about to break out in perfect-pitch song and perfectly choreographed dance. News flash: I can't sing to save my life and only High School Musical kids can do that. Last time I checked, I was in Tokyo, Japan. Not Where-ever-they-filmed-that-movie, America. Probably Hollywood. Everything is filmed in Hollywood. Except stuff that isn't but that's beside the point.
Anywho… I go back to sipping my tea when a thought hits me.
"F*ck!" I say almost dropping the mug as I look down at my watch. Three to six. "Double f*ck!" I set the tea holder on the table and vault over the couch before darting into my room and flinging the doors of my closet open so hard that a breeze hits me. "Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t," I whine looking around desperately for the crib. I could have sworn I left it-
"AH-HA!" By now most of the Akatsuki is crowded into my tiny apartment room, Zetsu being squished into the door way. "Comin' through," I say hoisting the (surprisingly light) bed above my head and making my way to the other side of my queen bed. It fits into the corner next to it almost perfectly then I dive back into the depths of the black hole I call my closet.
"What's with that, yeah?" Deidara asks but his voice sounds distant, muffled by the clothes that I have to dig through to get close to the baby gates in the back of my closet.
"My nephew is staying with me for a while," I say into the coat covering my mouth. "Blah," The coat is now in my mouth and I make a weird noise in order to try and get it out.
"Nephew?" The word echoes through my room and then the kanji comes falling down from the sky behind them, making a small cloud of dust. "Nephew?"
"Yep," I say and cough a few times as I back out of my closet, holding the baby gate I need to put over the laundry room door. "I gave them Byakko for a week now I get to babysit Ryuu for a week."
"Who's Byakko?" Kakuzu asks and I can see the frown lines around his eyes. A few possible explanations fly through my mind. Spawn of Satan… B*tch… My own personal hell-giver… Shaking my head mentally, I choose the nicest one.
"My cat," This gets everyone to anime fall.
"Doesn't seem like a fair trade does it?" Zetsu asks tilting his head to the side slightly. "They get a cat, you get their bratty kid."
"You're right." I close my eyes in thought and bring my hand to my chin. "Maybe I should have said I'd babysit for two weeks." Another anime fall.
Ding-dong! My eyes fly open.
"D*mn!" I start to run for the door but freeze. "Uh… stay!" I point my finger at them like they're one giant dog before darting towards the door.
"Aren't you going to invite us in?" My older brother, Riku, asks stepping inside the threshold once I get there. My eye twitches a little and my shoulders slump.
"You weren't supposed to come in. Just give me the goods and leave,"
"You make it sound like a drug deal," Tanaka says with a small smile as the bundle of coats and scarves in her arms bounces. Riku, on the other hand, has the hissing pet carrier.
"Let her out anywhere," I say over my shoulder before swooping up the bundle. "There's my favorite nephew!" Baby laughter fills the air making both of his parents smile.
"Awntie Mowi!" I laugh as well and it takes a second to find his face before I Eskimo kiss him.
"What did your momma do to you?" I say in a mock annoyed tone as I set him down. He falls over but I doubt if he really feels it. The stuff my sister-in-law threw on him before they left is enough to absorb the shock of an earthquake.
"I'm keeping him warm," She says crossing her arms over her chest and shivering a little as I kick the front door shut.
"Cripes, do you want to cook him?" I grumble getting the last of his coats off and throwing them into a pile on the floor next to the shoes, effectively covering up the extras before my brother and sister-in-law can notice. "All better!" I squeal, my voice going up an octave or two.
"Aw be'wer!" Ryuu crows and I almost die of the cuteness.
"Look out," Riku says dully and I scoop Ryuu off the floor as he lets Byakko out of her cage. Hissing up a storm, she instantly goes to my feet to attack them as 'punishment.'
"Stupid cat," I say under my breath and aim a careless kick at her. It misses but the point is made and she goes to hide under the couch. "Okay. Bye!" I start to shove them out the door again but Tanaka stops me, shoving a giant suitcase of baby stuff into my hands.
"Now if you need us you have our number right?"
"Yeah, yeah. Didn't you promise not to nag me after the weekend was such a success?"
"Yes but-"
"Call if you need us," I say and make Ryuu wave at his parents.
"Kumori," Riku says slowly, looking over my shoulder. "Who's that?" I freeze up instantly and turn around fearing the worst.
"Oh that?" Laughing nervously as I put Ryuu on my hip, I scuttle over to Itachi. "Play along," I say under my breath. Itachi gives an almost invisible nod. I'm guessing he can sense my panic. "This is Itachi my… boyfriend," I say the last word lamely, mostly blurting it.
"Oh Kumori!" Tanaka gushes, rushing over to Itachi. "You never said you had a boyfriend!"
"Yeah. Shocking," Riku says ruffling my hair. Faintly, I can hear laughter. Those b*stards.