Forgetting Me

Disclaimer: I do not own Matantei Loki

- - - -Chapter 10: Understanding- - - -

Understanding is the first step to acceptance, and only with acceptance can there be recovery.

~Joanne Kathleen Rowling~

Not a single thing was registered in Loki's mind the moment he saw her, a feet away from him. Her angelic face stared at him. Concern etched all over her face and crimson eyes. A chilly wind past them and she wrapped her arms around herself, bringing her orange jacket closer to her body.

Please don't look at me like that. He thought when she continued looking at him with innocent eyes as she waited for him to speak.

It must have been when Loki's vision was in a hazy blur and when he vaguely saw her eyes go wide that his eyes were becoming teary. Instinctively, he ducked and immediately covered his face on his coat's sleeve while wiping his eyes in the process. He didn't need to see her. Especially now when he was at his weakest and most breaking point.

"Is something the matter, mister? Why are you crying?" Mayura asked softly, inching towards him as she planned to comfort him.

Mister… she called him mister… Well of course she would. She doesn't remember him. He just realized that now, knowing the reality of her not remembering him, hurt him more that it used to when he only imagined it. This was life, he thought bitterly.

"Go away." His tone wasn't harsh but it still came out as a whisper.

Mayura merely shook her head and was now beside him. Without a word, hearing the wave's crash hard on the rocks, she knelt down, watching the ocean before her. Loki felt her presence and heat next to him and he fought down the urge to hug her. Instead, he looked up, not meeting his emerald eyes to her crimson ones. Mayura only shrugged, thinking he didn't want to talk to some stranger. Still, she was stubborn just like him.

She sighed. "I can listen to your problems if you're willing to share." She spoke, destroying the silence between them.

"It doesn't concern you." He said, forcefully and louder this time.

"I can listen."

He just wanted her to go away and leave him with his thoughts but he wanted her beside him too. Comforting him and listening to him of what he had done to her.

The sun was slowly setting, leaving a certain orange kind of glow in the sky. Birds flapped around their wings, soaring through the sky without any care at all in the world. He looked up at the sky with Mayura following suit as both of them admired the sunset. The color of the sun and sky looked amazing and breathtaking as its glow covered the whole atmosphere with warmth. It was beautiful.

But to Loki, the sunset wasn't as beautiful as the girl beside him. He saw how her eyes would light up just by seeing something so beautiful and how her lips would twitch up ever so slowly, knowing a smile would appear. Every fiber in his brain was fried and dead and he couldn't think anymore, not knowing what to do anymore but stare at the young girl beside him. The girl who became his friend; the one who caught his eye with her natural beauty and the mortal who he was helplessly in love with.

"What would say when you know that someone – a close friend of yours, erased your memories?" Loki finally asked as he slowly looked at her, eye to eye and he couldn't help but feel the slight and yet strong electricity run through his body once his eyes, once again, landed on hers.

"Erase my memories?" she cocked her head questioningly while she furrowed her eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

"Erasing your memories… I mean literally erasing you memories."

Just as Loki repeated it, she pondered on his question silently as she looked at the ground thoughtfully. The god of mischief could only quietly stare at the girl beside him, wanting to know more than anything else what her thoughts were. He knew that it wasn't fair to ask her this kind of things since she was exactly in the same position he had asked her. But he still wanted to know what her thoughts about it were.

"Well, I don't why this person would erase my memories," her voice snapped him back to her as he struggled to compose himself and try to settle down his emotions and thoughts running around his mind endlessly.

"But… this person must have a reason to erase my memories of them. I won't get made though and whatever the reason, I'll understand and forgive them." She said softly before she stretched her arms up in the air. "That's my answer, mister."

By the time she turned to him, she noticed that his face was contorted in sadness as he gazed at her agonizingly. Pain suddenly lurched on her stomach uncomfortably while a sad swelling in her heart ached for some unknown reason she didn't know of. This feeling she felt… it was similar and it felt like she had this before, but she couldn't remember. It was like the same lonely feeling she felt once before and it hurt, a dull pain lingering around her body.

Arms wrapped tightly around her body before any thoughts could register again in her mind. Surprised was written all over her face once she knew this arms – this warm and familiar arms belonged to this stranger beside her. She knew she should have screamed or attacked him but this warmth and scent felt so familiar. She felt safe being hugged by him.

"I'm sorry…" he whispered near her ear and she felt a shiver ran down her spine and was about to ask why he was apologizing but he continued. "I'm so sorry for doing this to you. It wasn't right and it was unfair… I was selfish, Mayura."

"W-What? Why are you apologizing? How do you even know my name?"

Loki hugged her more closely and tightly, clutching to her for dear life, never wanting to let go of her. And if he did, he knew that it was a possibility that he was going to lose her again. His mind screamed that he didn't deserve her and he knew that. Selfishness somehow found its way in his vocabulary and it fitted him. Thor was right. He was selfish. It was a fact that he couldn't agree more.

"Mayura, I want you to know that I erased your memories and I regret it and please, forgive me…" he continued, muttering more to himself than to her.

"What are you talking about?" Mayura cried helplessly, clearly not understanding what was going on with this man hugging her. "Please, you have to let… go."

"Please, just for a moment… let me stay like this before I let go. Please…" Loki begged and hearing the sadness in his voice, shaking slightly like he was holding back tears, she couldn't say no.

"I love you…"

For some reason, at that moment, Mayura felt a hidden spell on her had broken. She looked at Loki with new eyes. Instantly, flashes of images came crashing down her mind and it disappeared as quickly as it appeared. Realization soon hit her. She finally remembered everything from the past up to this day. Her memories of Loki and the others were back and for once, she felt complete and whole again.

Wordlessly and with a smile on her face, she touched the god of mischief's cheek lightly and stroked it tenderly. With startled eyes, Loki looked up to face her and in an instant, he knew what had happened. She wasn't looking at him like how she looked at him earlier. No, her eyes showed the same familiarity she once held when they were friends.

She smiled. "I understand."

It felt like a warm shining light engulfed the darkness that was built up inside Loki's body. Those simply words had lifted every negative feelings in his heart and he doesn't feel heavy anymore. He loved her and she knew that.

Loki breathed a sigh of relief and joy before he tackled her again in another hug. Verdandi's spell broke and Loki couldn't be happier than ever.

:: End ::

I don't think I really made this story as what I thought it would come out but even so, I feel satisfied finishing this up and I am here to announce that 'Forgetting Me' is soon coming to an end. I'll be updating more soon so please wait!

Please! If there are any readers… please review for my sake! I'd be happy to read your comments about my chapters of this story so far. :3