Stupid Geniuses Ch 19
Third Person POV
"Get up," Itachi is standing over the communal room the Akatsuki is sleeping in. Their warehouse is big but, Itachi's logic being that big spaces hold more enemies, they all sleep in one room. Their entire lodging area is in just three rooms. Living space/sleeping area, bathroom, kitchen. It's a little bit cramped at times but they make it work. Barely. "We're going out to scout, find stations, find the girl and where she lives, and get her back." He looks around stonily, daring anyone to say a word. Things are totally silent, and hope rises in everyone's hearts. Kumori, their Kumori, would be coming back. Grr-owr-rowr. "We'll get food as well," He says coolly, like it was his plan all along.
Hope seems to wake everyone up a little. They all get up and dressed in a dramatic silence. The group is pretty hungry, but nobody says anything to ruin their dramatic mood. Hidan even hums the mission impossible theme under his breath.
"Alright, let's go," Itachi says, slightly impatient. His hair doesn't even get messed up when he sleeps. He's that awesome. "I'm pairing you off," He says once everyone stumbles out into the sun, squinting as the birds around them start screaming "I'M A BIRD! I'M A BIRD! I'M A BIRD! I'M A BIRD!"
Well, not really. They're just chirping.
"Let's go, make sure nobody notices you," Itachi dramatically puts his rice farmer's hat on. The others sigh a little and follow, making sure they don't really get noticed. If they really didn't want to get noticed, they wouldn't be traveling in such a big group but nobody ever really thinks about that now do they?
The (stupidly large) group walks in the early morning, each move quieted. It's one of those mornings where you feel you have to be quiet or you'll shatter everything. Zetsu had scouted earlier in the week and found out where Kumori was residing. With that ANBU. Tobi's fists clench slightly at the though of the Kumori he had become so close to living in the same house as an ANBU.
Tobi hated ANBU.
And he now had a reason to.
"Lighten up, Tobi, un," Deidara says glancing down to Tobi's tightened fists. "We'll get her back soon," Tobi, instead of having a witty and adorable comeback/answer, only nods stonily.
"Meet in the main map room," Itachi says just softly enough for the other Akatsuki members to hear. He then disappears in a flash, followed by the rest. Zetsu is the first one in the room, of course. He just melted in. Itachi is second and the others follow, with Kakuzu the last one inside. He had to go all the way up to the roof and rappel down the air vents to get into the room.
Itachi's eyes open slowly and he searches around the room for a few moments before he walks over to one of the file-filled cabinets and opens it. His eyes dart from one side to the other as he rifles through a couple, pausing once or twice to regain his composure.
"There are two guards headed this way, they're two hundred meters and closing," He says not taking his eyes off of the files in front of him.
"I've got it," Kisame says starting towards the door but Itachi stops him, raising one hand.
"They're just civilians. Deidara, you know what you have to do." Deidara lets out a loud groan but nods and goes outside the room.
…line…line…line…line…
Outside the Room
"Oh, pooh," A leggy blond in a shorter than appropriate mint-green dress and matching ankle-breaking heels says stamping one foot gently as the guards approach her. "I can't find my purse. I left it right here just a couple of seconds ago," Her bottom (perfectly glossed) lip quivers at the idea of her precious Gucci purse being gone. "Could you big…strong men help me find it?" She gives them each a once over before looking up, a shy smile on her lips.
"Ma'am, that's a job for the lost and found, not us," The guard on the right doesn't blink.
Shit. Deidara thinks as sweat starts dripping down the back of his neck as the short hem of his dress seems even shorter. The jutsu isn't as strong as he would like and the guys, he realizes after a second, are gay. Yep. Deidara has a gaydar. Don't question it.
Then, almost like magic, Hidan is shoved into the hall by a pair of blue hands. Shirtless. And pant-less.
"Hey! Fuck! No shoving! I'm going! I'm going!" He stumbles out and screeches to a stop in front of Deidara. The guards freeze and look at Hidan. The rising sun casts an almost angelic glow behind him, his silvery hair lighting up in the early morning rays. The two guards both get nosebleeds.
Hidan slowly turns around with a smirk, raising one eyebrow at the two men. He crosses his arms across his (very muscular) chest and cocks one hip at the guys.
"My sister," His lips falter from their smirk for a split second when he says the word but he quickly regains his composure. "lost her purse, you wanna help us find it?"
"O-Of course sir!" They both say, their heels snapping together. "Anything to help out your sister, sir," Hidan chuckles a little and slings his arms over both their shoulders, pulling them in close as they walk off to go find the mysterious purse.
…line…line…line…line…
Back Inside
"Hurry up, Uchiha," Kisame growls, his small eyes darting from side to side as Deidara steps back into the room. He glares and transforms back to how he usually looks.
"You guys suck, yeah," He grumbles, rubbing his feet gently. "Next time, Tobi's going to be the girl, un," Tobi says nothing, just reaching across Itachi's chest and pulling the file out. Itachi blinks twice and then turns around, glaring death at anyone who dares look at him.
"We're leaving soon. Deidara, go get Hidan," Itachi says darkly, storming out of the room.
"GOD DAMMIT, YEAH!" Deidara transforms back and stomps out, going to find Hidan. He's sleazing it up with the gay guards. He's leaning up against the wall and the two guards are practically drooling whenever he blinks.
"Um~" Deidara presses one finger underneath his lip and pouts, rotating one foot around in circles. "I kinda forget, but~ I didn't bring a purse~! Hee-hee! Sorry!" He grabs Hidan's wrist and drags him back to the map room, transforms back to his normal self, and jumps out the window. The Jashinist grabs his clothes and pulls them back on as he slinks up through the roof.
"Go to the café next to here," Itachi's voice rings through the mind-link and they all drop lightly, walking in and getting food.
…line…line…line…line…
Kumori's POV
"Ooo… This place is so cute!" I squeal, darting into the little café next to the archive. It's very sunny and Kenshori has been raving about the food, so I suggested we go out for breakfast. He laughs and reaches over my head, opening the door, which jingles cheerily as we walk inside. I excitedly get in line, bouncing on the balls of my feet happily. "This smells amazing~" Kenshori laughs, it rumbling in my chest as well.
"It's one of my favorites, I'm sure you'll love it," He says clapping a hand down on my shoulder. The line moves quickly and before I know it I'm up to the counter. Kenshori steps forward, ordering for me since I'm still dazzled by the hugeness of the menu. He rattles off a couple of different things and pays before I can regain my composure.
"This way," He says smiling, smoothly sliding an arm around my shoulders and leading me towards a table in the back corner. My eyes swirl at how silky he is as he sits me down, pouring me a glass of tea and a mug of orange juice.
"Aren't you gonna have any?" I ask taking a sip of the colored juice and reveling in the fact that it's fresh-squeezed.
"I don't drink the stuff," He smiles behind a mug of tea. "My mom always said to drink apple juice because OJ would kill me," He adds seeing my confused look.
"I want to meet her," I say into my glass of juice. He gets misty-eyed and looks at a spot just over my right shoulder.
"Kenshori?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. What do you want to do after this? Maybe I could show you around?" We both fall silent after that, and I know I said something wrong.
Our food comes quickly and my tummy gives a happy urgle. It looks fantastic.
"So," I say after my tummy has stopped threatening to eat itself. "We talked about my past yesterday, what about you?" He takes another bite of crepe to stall a little and drinks a few gulps of tea.
"Well," He says looking me in the eye and I find myself warmed to my core by his gaze. "When I was a kid, I saw my parents killed by a gang of thugs." I gasp quietly, putting a hand over my mouth.
"I'm so sorry," I say quietly and he shrugs it off, waving a hand.
"I got my revenge, I killed a pair of their members and got their bounty," He stabs an egg yolk and it leaks out across the white part. He smiles bitterly, watching it.
…line…line…line…line…
"Thanks for breakfast," I say beaming at Kenshori as we stand up to leave the restaurant.
"No problem," He laughs and slings an arm over my shoulders, kinda just hanging it there but I still feel my face flushing from the contact. We walk out when I suddenly hear a clatter of silverware and a dart of orange going towards the back. I look over to the general direction it came from and freeze up, my eyes going huge. "You okay?" He asks, his lips almost brushing my ear.
"Akatsuki," I say breathlessly, feeling my heart squeezing in my chest. Kenshori's bangs cover his eyes and I can't read the look on his face as he leads me out quickly.
…line…line…line…line…
Akatsuki POV
"Let's go," Itachi says quietly. It's dark out, setting a very dramatic mood. The group slips out their window, for the plan they're about to put into motion is too dramatic to use the front door. They get to the side of Kenshori's apartment complex and Itachi turns back. "We'll scale up to the roof, punch in the greenhouse door, and make sure the silent alarm is off. Then-" He cuts off, seeing Tobi already inside Kumori's room, waving with what probably is a huge smile.
When Itachi turns back around the rest of his group is gone. He sighs and disappears in a puff of smoke, reappearing in the room with everyone else.
"This way," He says, taking his role as leader back and leading them out of Kumori's room. The TV is on in the next room and Kumori's quiet snores can be heard.
"Itachi," A voice says darkly, making him turn. "It's been a long time," Kenshori reaches over and turns on the lamp light next to him, but it's a small one so he still has dramatic shadows cast over his face. Itachi freezes, looking a lot like a deer caught in the headlights. Kisame bumps into him and the two fall into a pile, creating a domino affect. So much for ninjas being graceful.
Itachi pulls himself from the dog pile, knowing that he won't be able to salvage his reputation after that.
"If you think you can take Kumori from me, you'd better be ready to fight for her," Kenshori says, looking down at the shorter ninja.
"Tobi will kill Kenshori-san if he tries to keep Tobi from Kumori-chan," Tobi says in a voice so dark that it makes Kakuzu look surprised. He starts towards the taller man but Itachi puts his arm out, hitting him in the chest gently.
"This is my fight, Tobi. Stand down," Tobi gives him a dark look but does back down, looking very resentful.
"It's been a long time, Itachi," Kenshori says again, looking like he wants to kill him.
"Not long enough," Itachi spits, his Sharingan swirling.
Kenshori laughs. "You don't really think you can take her from me, do you?"
"There's 7 of us and 1 of you," The pony-tailed one says snarkily.
"I killed two of you when I was just a little boy, 7 should be easy with my new skill and knowledge," Kenshori snorts
"That's the problem with Konoha. You guys never know when to back down." Itachi smirks slightly and steps forward, bowing down into a swing at Kenshori's legs with his kunai.
Kenshori back-steps and gives Itachi a doubting look.
"Did you really think it would be that easy?" Itachi grunts as he swings his right-hand kunai for his legs, and back-swings with his left. Kenshori has already managed to step just out of the way of the first one as the back-swing cuts a hole in his shirt.
"Whew. That one was a close call. If I only had a weapon..." He trails off as Itachi goes for another swing. Kenshori kicks his wrist in mid-motion and makes him drop his kunai. Kenshori catches it gracefully before it hits the floor. "Aww. How sweet of you! You shouldn't have!" He says with a swing cut off a lock of Itachi's hair, still suspended where he was just moments ago. "No, really. You shouldn't have." Itachi bends down and removes a kunai he had hidden in his boot, his eyes never leaving his opponent.
"You know, that kinda looked like you were bowing down to me. For a second, I thought I wasn't going to have to kill you." Kenshori jokes as he plays with the kunai like a toy. Itachi scans for a moment to make an attack.
He grabs a shuriken hidden in his belt and tosses it backhanded at Kenshori, acting like he was going to brush his hair out of his eye. Kenshori doesn't even so much as blink as he swings the kunai down and hits the shuriken away. "Itachi, you must have learned something new since the last time we danced."
"Kenshori-san, you seen to be as unskilled as the last time we battled," Itachi says, lying through his teeth, though his gaze never wavers. "I'm going to give you one last chance to stand down."
"You know, I guess I should show you some of what I've learned. Here's your artifact back." Kenshori says, tossing the kunai at the floor in front of Itachi. "I much prefer these," Kenshori chuckles as he withdraws two short-swords from hidden scabbards.
Itachi doesn't show the sudden fear behind him. Instead, he grabs his next two shuriken, throwing one for the neck and one for an ankle. Kenshori literally dives through the middle, straight at Itachi's chest, laying the tip of one blade against it as he looks up at his face. "I've decided to be generous. One last chance, do you want to leave?" Ken says, pressing the tip of his sword just enough to cause a small trickle of blood.
…line…line…line…line…
I can't believe you ran, yeah, Itachi..." Deidara chuckles as they settle into camp.
"It was either leave then, or things became really messy."
"We could have messed him up, un."
"You weren't paying attention. He had back-up on the way. I could hear them enter the front door. Are you deaf, Deidara? Blind, too? If he got lucky enough to kill two of us before, who says that a whole team of them can't take 7 of us on their own home turf?" Itachi looks at him harshly and Deidara settles back into a squashy arm-chair.
"You could have let us fight, yeah," He says pouting slightly.