Disclaimer: I don't own Wicked or Sisters Grimm
Thank Goodness For Fern (Reprise)
I was only a spectator for now but I wanted to see my new best friend and Puck singing. I hadn't really had the time to admire their work. I've been on stage forever and it was tiring. As I drank my gigantic bottle of water I was sitting in a make-up chair in the wings of the stage. Delilah was fixing my hair and curling the ends. I was currently in my dress and it was hiked around my waist so I could sit more comfortably. I was wearing my jeans underneath and I would take them off as soon as I was due on stage.
Destiny was fixing my make-up constantly since my lips continued to smudge as I drank from the water. Suddenly, the music started up again. It was No One Mourns the Wicked…Reprise! Just great…another song about how they hate me.
The curtain didn't go up like they thought it would. They came outside and were standing on things.
CITIZENS:
(Sung) Everyday the Wicked
Everyday the terror grows
All of Oz is ever on alert (That sounded so cool. The guys went higher and the girls went lower. The only drawback was that they were singing about me. It was insulting)
FEMALE CITIZENS:
(Sung) That's the way with Wicked
Spreading fear…
CITIZENS:
(Sung) Where e'er she goes
Seeking out new victims she can hurt! (A girl I knew in passing rushed up. I didn't know her so I don't think she has anything against me)
OZIAN WOMAN:
(Sung) Like some terrible green blizzard
Throughout the land she flies! (I think I spoke too soon. Well, it's just a play. I only have a problem with some people in the show, like Arthur, Daniel, Belinda and previously Fern. Another guy that looked like her brother rushed forward. It was just another one of the people who played students)
OZIAN MAN:
(Sung) Defaming our poor Wizard
ALL CITIZENS:
(Sung) With her calumnies and lies!
She lies!
Save us from the Wicked!
Shield us so we won't be hexed!
Give us warning!
Where will she strike next? (The curtain began to rise with Fern on a platform and Puck standing next to her. Belinda was on her other side in a butt ugly outfit. I choked on my water when I saw her)
Where will she strike next?
Where will she strike next? (The citizens surrounded the platform and stared at Fern in wonder as if she really were Glinda the Good. And in her eyes she sure was. The blonde hair, the vertically challenged body, the blue sparkling eyes. She was a teenage Glinda. And I'm not a big fan of Glinda)
FERN:
(Spoken) Fellow Ozians, as terrifying as terror is
Let us put aside our panic for this one day…and celebrate! (She made a little happy dance and I rolled my eyes. Fern is ridiculous. I swear…she's a funny girl but she's a nut. There was no happy dance in the script. Whatever…)
(Sung) Oh what a celebration
We'll have today (Her arms were raised and held open. Puck stood stiff with his hands behind his back.
CROWD
Thank Goodness!
FERN
Let's have a celebration
The Glinda way! (She smiled and held out her hands to the crowd looking down at her)
CROWD
Thank Goodness!
BELINDA
Fin'lly a day that's
Totally Wicked-Witch free! (She was actually really, really, really good. Delilah seemed to think so too because she started choking on the Japanese brush in her mouth. She was repainting my hands now.)
CROWD
We couldn't be happier
Thank Goodness!
BELINDA:
(Spoken) Yes, and thank goodness for you Glinda
And your new handsome swain, our new
Captain of the Guard (Fern started dusting imaginary dust off Puck's chest. She just won't give up, will she?)
Now you've been at the forefront of the hunt
For the Wicked Witch, haven't you? (Puck stiffened as she called me a Wicked Witch. Obviously he really did believe I was Good)
Is there any news of capturing her?
PUCK:
(Spoken) Not really…and I don't think of
Her as the Wicked Witch. (Belinda had stopped paying attention for while now and she was waving to the crowd along with Fern)
BELINDA
(Spoken) So Captain, how does it feel?
PUCK
(Spoken) Frustrating… (He stepped onto the highest part of the platform, switching places with Fern who ushered him forward. He was about to start a speech…)
But I became Captain to find her
And I'll keep searching!
BELINDA
(Spoken) No! Being engaged (Puck froze and I giggled under my breath. He looked at Fern, his eyes turned purple. Whoa…purple meant sibling love. He loved her…as a sister! He looked around surprised)
CROWD
(Spoken/Shouted) CONGRATULOTIONS! (Yeah…that's spelled right. They actually said 'Congratulotions'. I so do not want to go to Oz if they have all this weird lingo. I already have to hear it from my chatty best friend…that's enough for a lifetime)
PUCK
(Spoken) This is an engagement party?
FERN
(Spoken) Surprised?
PUCK
(Spoken) Yes…(He said it loudly but as if he couldn't believe that she thought they were getting married, let alone having an engagement party. But that's Glinda, or even Fern for you. Fern would do something like that…)
FERN
(Spoken) We hoped you'd be…the Wizard and I (Fern stepped onto the tiny platform with him and grabbed him by the arms. He leaned back and Fern was about to sing again)
(Sung) We couldn't be happier,
Right, dear?
Couldn't be happier
Right here
Look what we've got
A fairy-tale plot
Our very own happy ending (Fern looked to me and gave a small smile. She leaned in and pretended to kiss him. That's a good best friend, right there! And we're almost done with the show! Then I can collapse in my bed! Wait…Act 2 just started!)
Where we couldn't be happier -
True, dear?
Couldn't be happier
And we're happy to share
Our ending vicariously
With all of you
He couldn't look handsomer
I couldn't feel humbler
We couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your dreams come true! (He leaned in and kissed her on the cheek. I smiled, softly and Destiny looked at me to see how I'd react.
"He sees her as a sister and only as a sister. He told me and she understands. She didn't even kiss him" I said, quietly.
Destiny nodded and continued to watch. Puck wrapped his arms around Fern's waist. Thank God he's acting…his eyes were still purple with sibling love)
BELINDA
(spoken) And Glinda dear, we're happy for you! As Press
Secretary, I have striven to ensure that all of Oz
knows the story of your braverism:
How vividly I remember that day…
(sung) The day you were first summoned
To an audience with Oz
And although he would not tell you why initially
When you bowed before his throne
He decreed you'd hence be known
As Glinda the Good - officially! (She went stronger and I shook my head. Fern wasn't there yet. According to Puck, each ruler of a Everafter group is deemed as the Wicked or the Good. Most likely, she'll be Fern the Good)
PUCK
(Spoken) That's not how you described it to me…
FERN
(Spoken) Oh no, not exactly (Then she lowered her voice though everyone could still here her)
But we'll talk about it later
BELINDA
(Sung)Then with a jealous squeal
The Wicked Witch burst from concealment
Where she had been lurking -surrpetitially!
WOMAN IN CROWD:
I hear she has an extra eye
That always remains awake
ANOTHER FEMALE:
I hear that she can shed her skin
As easily as a snake!
ANOTHER FEMALE: (Where are all the guys during this? They were singing earlier…I think?)
I hear some rebel Animals
Are giving her food and shelter!
MAN IN CROWD: (Here's the guy!)
I hear her soul is so unclean
Pure water can melt her! (Holy shit! He did not just say my soul is so unclean that water can melt me! Oh screw you, Papperman! That's his last name…)
PUCK:
What! (He sounded surprised and angry. I smiled softly at his protectiveness.
"Stop smiling! I'm trying to paint your lips. No red…thank God the red rubbed off in the beginning. Red did not look good" Delilah murmured.
This girl is too crazy to realize that I'm glaring at her to shut up…funny)
CROWD
Melt her!
Please - somebody go and melt her! (That's it! I'll blow everyone of them to bits. I started to get up when Delilah held me to seat. She shook her head. I realized she right. If I went out there the whole script and play would end early…with my death)
PUCK
(spoken) Do you hear that - water will melt her? People
are so empty-headed, they'll believe anything!
FERN
(spoken) Excuse us, just a tick tock
PUCK
(Spoken) What? I can't just stand here grinning
Pretending to go along with all of this!
FERN
(Spoken) Fiyero! Do you think I like hearing those
Awful things about her? I hate it!
PUCK
(Spoken) Then what are we doing here? (He grabbed Fern's hand and tried to pull her away. She pulled back and away from him)
Let's go! Let's get out of here!
FERN
(Spoken) I can't. I can't leave now!
Not when people are looking to me to raised their spirits!
PUCK
(Spoken) You can't leave because you can't resist this!
And that is the truth… (He sounded disappointed in Fern and as if he thought highly of me because I could. I couldn't a while ago. A while ago all I cared about was my popularity. Then I learned there were more important things…like real friends)
FERN
(Spoken) Maybe I can't. Is that so wrong?
Who could? (He jerked away from her and started to walk away)
PUCK
(Spoken) You know who could…
And who has…
FERN
(Spoken) Fiyero, I miss her too…
But we can't just stop living.
No one has searched harder for her than you
Don't you see? She doesn't want to be found
We have to face it (She sounded as if she were poisoned by the popularity she had received and it was a good thing)
PUCK
(Spoken) You're right…
You're right! (He hugged Fern and she hugged him back, tightly)
If it makes you happy, of course
I'll marry you… (I cringed at the very thought and had to remind myself a lot that it was only a play. Only a play…no musical. I like to differentiate. He kissed her hand)
FERN
(Spoken) But it'll make you happy too, right? (He forced back a grimace)
PUCK
(Spoken) You know me…I'm always happy… (You don't sound too happy now, Puck. You sound kind of worried and even pissed off. He ran off stage and towards me. He looked down at me and knelt by my seat. He kissed my wrist and I smiled)
FERN
(Spoken) Fiyero! Oh - yes, thanks plenty, dearest! He's gone to (The citizens walked back around the platform and stared at the figurehead)
fetch me a refreshment. He's so thoughtful that way!
(sung) That's why I couldn't be happier
No, I couldn't be happier (She didn't sound too happy. She sounded worried and doubtful)
Though it is, I admit
The tiniest bit
Unlike I anticipated
But I couldn't be happier
Simply couldn't be happier
(spoken) Well - not "simply":
(sung) 'Cause getting your dreams
It's strange, but it seems
A little - well – complicated (She sounded…worried now. As if she thinking of me and giving up our friendship for nonsense like she was in the middle of)
There's a kind of a sort of : cost
There's a couple of things get: lost
There are bridges you cross
You didn't know you crossed
Until you've crossed (She looks so regretful now and she sounded so powerful. I looked at her in amazement. Puck joined me in staring in shock)
And if that joy, that thrill
Doesn't thrill you like you think it will
Still -
With this perfect finale
The cheers and ballyhoo
Who
Wouldn't be happier? (You know who couldn't be happier. I wouldn't be happy n any of that!)
So I couldn't be happier
Because happy is what happens
When all your dreams come true
Well, isn't it? (That not true…I'm not there Fern…you couldn't truly be happy without your best friend!)
Happy is what happens
When your dreams come true!
CROWD
We love you, Glinda, if we may be so frank
GLINDA
Thank Goodness!
CROWD
For all this joy, we know who we've got to thank:
Thank Goodness!
That means the Wizard, Glinda:
GLINDA
And fiance! (He's not yours. He leaves you! Ha! He loves me. He loves you only as a sister)
CROWD
They couldn't be goodlier
She couldn't be lovelier
We couldn't be luckier
FERN
(Sung) I couldn't be happier
CROWD
(Sung) Thank Goodness:
FERN AND CROWD
(Sung) Today! (Fern held the note and I stood up. It was time for me to go)
Thank Goodness for today!
The platform moved backwards and I stood. Daphne was being rolled out with Arthur at his side and suddenly, it was time for me to meet my sisters once again…