Hermione Down Under

Chapter 14 Life and Art

The trio walked along the pavement behind the hotel. Hermione felt very exposed: suppose the Elf was watching them from a distance. What was more, she was worried about Luna, who wasn't used to dealing with Muggle traffic and might walk into the street at the wrong time.

"Look! There's a cinema!" Hermione called.

"Is that good?" asked Ron.

"I hadn't thought of it until now, but it'll be dark in there, making us hard to spot. And even if she DID spot us, we'll be in a crowd, and she might not attack us in public. It'll give us a place to hide and plan for a while."

"Fine with me," said Ron. "What do they do in a cimena?"

She didn't correct his pronunciation. "People look at moving pictures."

"They need a big building for that?" asked Luna. "You can see moving pictures in the Quibbler."

"Not like this. You'll see." Hermione felt a prick of excitement for the two. She hoped they enjoyed the novelty.

With neither Luna nor Ron familiar with motion pictures, it was up to Hermione to choose the film. She didn't know the Australian titles. Some looked like violent action films; she had had enough action for a while. One title looked intriguing: SHAKESPEARE IN LOVE. It was rated M, but all three of them were of age. Hermione bought 3 tickets.

Her original idea was to sit and talk, protected by a Muffliato spell, but she found herself getting fascinated by the movie itself. It was a sophisticated comedy, based on the idea that ROMEO AND JULIET had been inspired by a secret love affair of the young Shakespeare's. Yet some of it had disturbing implications for Hermione. The girlfriend had a "Nurse", a sort of overgrown nanny, who was supposed to be funny but creeped Hermione out for some reason. There was also something spooky about Shakespeare himself.

Then came the love scene. Hermione, who had never seen a movie nude scene before, was startled, and she could only imagine the effect on Luna and Ron. Ostensibly the girl was just exposing herself to her boyfriend, but the actress – something Paltrow – must have been aware that her breasts would be visible to thousands of people throughout the world. Imagine one of her friends, say Harry, taking his clothes off in front of an audience! Actors must lead weird lives.

But what struck her more deeply was the URGENCY of the lovers. They had three weeks available to them before they had to part forever, and they had to make the most of it. That, Hermione realized, was what was lacking in the love life of students at Hogwarts. You knew in advance that your intended was going to be there for months and years, and it took the urgency out of the pursuit. Ron was always going to be there-

Except that he may not. They had not yet decided who was going back to Hogwarts next year; certainly Ron was less fascinated by the schoolwork than Hermione had always been. Suppose he left Hogwarts, and suppose that now he had seen how self-centered she could be, he decided to go his own way and not keep up the friendship? And it would be Hermione's fault if he reached that decision.

"Wow!" said Ron as the closing credits came up. "I've seen moving pictures all my life, but they were always focusing on a few seconds of action. I never thought of somebody stringing it out for a couple of hours and using it to tell a good story. And the Muggles did the whole thing without magic!"

"Ahem," murmured Luna. "Weren't we supposed to be talking about escape plans during the seminar?"

"Damn it, yes we were," said Hermione, almost kicking herself. "I got too caught up in the movie. Oh well, I can buy three more tickets. Unless somebody already has an idea." She hoped so. Not that she minded watching another movie, but now was not the time for them to relax.

"We can go back to the hotel," suggested Ron.

"The Elf will look for us there."

"She probably already has. But since she hasn't found us, she'll assume we've fled elsewhere, and will leave the original hotel alone. Remember what Luna said about being unpredictable."

Reverse psychology, yes. But the trouble with reverse psychology is that the other side may figure out your strategy and reverse it again. She had heard of something called "game theory" that actually systematized all that, but it definitely wasn't taught at Hogwarts.

The Elf was clever, but she wasn't particularly subtle. Reverse psychology was probably not her thing. Hermione agreed that they should go back to the hotel and try to stay out of sight in general. Tomorrow, she had to get back to her parents and try to mend things.

Luna disappeared into the ladies' loo and emerged with her familiar dirty-blonde hair back on, lest the desk clerk recognized a girl with spiky hair and purple shorts, and wanted to know why she was registering twice. She hadn't been wearing the I'M MATILDA – WALTZ ME T-shirt the first time, so that should be safe.

The trio ordered a double occupancy room and one single. The problem was determining how to split up.

"Let Hermione and me stay together," suggested Ron. Suddenly he went red as he realized how Luna would interpret it.

"Oh, that would be nice," purred Luna. From anybody else that statement would have been sarcastic or leering; but Luna was apparently cool with the idea that the pair would be together tonight. It was Hermione who was surprised.

"Ron," she said once the hotel room door was closed and they had privacy. "I thought you wanted some space and time to think, away from me. I know I've been horrid to you throughout this trip, all self-centered."

"I HAVE thought," said Ron, "and Luna helped me get my head on straight. Here's what I realized. Hermione, by rights, YOU should have been the star of the school. Not only were you the brightest student, but you didn't even have the head start the rest of us did. You came out of the Muggle world and immediately started beating wizards at their own game."

"But because of Voldemort," Ron continued, "you weren't the star. Harry was. The Boy Who Lived, the Chosen One. How did you react to being outshone? Did you try to tear down Harry at every turn, like Malfoy? No, you acted throughout as Harry's faithful friend, partly because he WAS your friend, and partly because you realized that the Wizard World needed you two to work together. You're not fundamentally an egoist, Hermione. During the past week you've been obsessed about fixing your parents' memories and trying to get back in a normal relationship, so you've been oblivious to other concerns, like being nice to me. But that's not the normal You. I see that now."

"But I still shouldn't have ignored you ,and in particular I shouldn't have put you on the spot about not studying the Enlightenment."

"Yeah, that WAS weird. I can't count the times you've saved my arse at school by helping me with my homework. I suppose you think that this Unlightenment stuff is different; that it's important for me to KNOW. Not to pass tests in school, but to understand it for myself."

"It IS important, Ron. Some of the greatest minds in history concentrated on how to solve social problems. Slavery, balance of power, the rights of individuals vs the needs of society. They didn't get final answers, but it would still help wizards decide better how to deal with house-elves, with dementors, with rebels like the Death Eaters. I think I can explain to Kingsley and McGonagall how important it is to teach to the next generation. But I'm Muggle-born. Even people who would never utter the word "Mudblood" might think I'm an outsider who doesn't really appreciate wizard traditions."

"Whereas, with the Weasley family behind you, people might listen more."

"Yes."

"OK. I'm still mad at you a bit, but this stuff sounds important, and I'll help. What's the next step?"

"Getting back to my parents, and keeping that bloody Mrs. Arwen off my arse. I want to convince Mum and Dad that this is a good cause. I don't want to break up with my parents for the rest of my life, unless it's absolutely necessary."

Ron thought it over for a moment. "All right. Maybe I can create a diversion, staying in Brisbane and making her believe you're with me. If she thinks you and I are having a wild love affair—"

"If she traces us back here, she'll already notice that we're together. If she doesn't trace us, maybe we've gotten rid of her. The ruse will work either way. Good."

Except for one thing.

Lying in her bed that night, and looking over the gap at Ron lying in his, Hermione wished she and Ron WERE having a wild love affair.

TO BE CONTINUED

(Author's Note: Hermione was rattled by the Nurse in the movie because she was played by Imelda "Umbridge" Staunton. Shakespeare was played by Joseph Fiennes, whose brother plays Lord Voldemort and whose nephew played the orphaned Tom Riddle)