If forever had a name it would be Misery, Misery for the forever I've spent thinking about Erza Scarlet. When I began, I thought I wanted her lips to desiccate… but if they did, how could she say my name? When I began, I thought I wanted her heart to still, but if it did, how could it beat for me? When I began, I thought I wanted her to hurt.

I still do.

My head is cobwebs. My eyes are dry. My tongue is used. My lips useless.

If I could die, I would; it would be simpler. And I would strike the match myself if it meant I could die burning in her fire.

The sun was sinking on the horizon when Jellal exited the council building, Erza on his mind, as ever. Her sighs. Her hands. Her demands. Scarlet running through his hands.

"There you are." Ultear's voice echoed out from a crevasse in the building, obliterating his fantasy.

Jellal halted; it had been almost two days since he'd spoken to her but he felt her presence like an invisible spike between his ribs. Turning, he found her in the shadows. "Hello, Ultear."

She stepped out, dressed today in a long, blue dress that nicely complimented the colour of her skin. Her dark hair was loose, falling around her heart-shaped face softly, picked up and bounced about by a gentle breeze. "So now we're being cordial?"

Jellal clenched his fists. "I won't apologize for my actions."

"I would expect nothing less. Come here." She waved him in close.

Jellal entered the shadows with her. It was where he belonged, wasn't it? "What is it? I'm supposed to be meeting Erza tonight, so make it quick."

Ultear's expression curdled. "I would like to think this is more important. I was speaking with Chairman Crawford this afternoon when one of the clerks came in bearing news from the navy. They told the council that they've stumbled upon a strange structure in the ocean."

Jellal's heart skipped a beat. "The Tower of Heaven."

"Yes, the Tower of Heaven. Jellal, the chairman told them to inform the king—he'll be sending his military ships soon."

Jellal quieted while he thought. Finally, he said, "The tower is completed."

"Yes," Ultear said with annoyance. "We're waiting on you."

He sighed. It was too soon—he wasn't done with Erza yet, but... "Take care of the ships and put word of Zeref's resurrection in the council's ear. If this is happening, we have to get them thinking about stopping this at any cost, we need the etherion cannon's magic energy."

Ultear smiled slowly and stepped in close to Jellal, wrapping her arms around his throat and standing on tiptoe. Jellal didn't push her back, not yet. "Soon Lord Zeref will walk among us," Ultear said and met his lips in a slow kiss.

A sharp gasp told Jellal that they weren't alone. Breaking away, he turned and met Ginny's gaze. The girl looked whiter than a ghost. She heard everything. Jellal huffed and scrubbed his hand over his jaw, scratching the stubble there. "What are you doing out here, Ginny?"

"I—I um... I just came to give you this." She produced his scarf from the pocket of her form-fitting coat. "You dropped it, Sir."

He took it from her hands and wrapped it around his throat methodically, calmly. "Thank you."

"That was all. Goodnight!" Ginny turned and tried to make her escape.

Jellal used his magic to take him in front of her. She hit his chest, unable to stop in time; meteor was too fast for that. He grabbed her shoulders and held her steady. "Not so fast."

Ginny squealed and recoiled. "Please, I didn't hear anything."

Jellal hauled her back so she was flat against his body. She quivered. "Really? If you heard nothing, then why are you running away?" Killing magic gathered in his hand.

"Please, Master Siegrain," she begged. "I—I can be quiet. I won't tell anyone."

Jellal paused, but Ultear didn't. From her coat, she produced a gleaming knife and drove it mercilessly into Ginny's ribs. The girl flinched and gasped in pain and vainly clutched Jellal's coat while he watched the life fade from her eyes. Slowly, she went limp and sagged. He held her tightly until her lungs stopped heaving, trying for air instead of blood.

"She was a good clerk."

"Good or not, I always knew that girl was going to be trouble." Ultear snorted and pulled out her orb. Magic was tugged from its center, rotting the ground at Jellal's feet. He stepped back just enough not to be swallowed into the pit. When it opened, he threw Ginny unceremoniously inside and watched her flop lifelessly to the ground below the road level. There was a little bit of blood leaking from her mouth. Then Ultear closed the wounded concrete and blocked her from view. "I suppose we're lucky we caught her, she could have wrecked everything."

Jellal scrubbed his palms against his jacket, but he still felt the way Ginny's lungs fluttered while she died. "I suppose."

"And this is why we should be moving quickly. I'll make sure Councillor Crawford knows that 'Jellal' plans on resurrecting Master Zeref."

"I'll be there to suggest an etherion blast," Jellal said after a moment. Which meant this was his last night with Erza. He chewed on his cheek, deciding how he wanted to spend it: as a pretender? The thought left a bitter taste in his mouth. I can't. I have to tell her.

What if she hates me?

She would.

There was no escaping that.

It didn't change things, though.

Erza brushed her fingers through the end of her hair as she walked, a song on her lips. This evening she'd traded her armour for a dark purple dress that fell just above her knees. At the waist was a lilac bow and around the neckline were delicate frills. It was girlier than anything she'd ever worn before and bought specifically for this evening. She'd even gone to the lingerie store as Mira suggested, and purchased undergarments that made her both flush with embarrassment and radiant with excitement.

Earlier that day, the sun had been hot. Most of the snow had melted so the sidewalks were barren, save for the occasional rivulet of water as it trickled towards the storm drains. Exposed, the grass was yellow and grey and covered with bits of garbage: tinfoil, plastic, cigarette butts, a few beer bottles. Soon Magnolia's city workers would come and pick up the winter's refuse, but for now, the rich part of the city looked incredibly party-worn.

Rounding the corner, she saw Siegrain out front of the Magic Council building as he promised, leaned back against the lifeless gardens, hands tucked into his pockets. A smile pulled at his mouth as soon as he saw her.

Unconsciously, Erza walked faster, last night's escapades trilling through her mind, making her heart beat frantically, making her skin hot, making her stomach whirl. His hands. His hands. She loved them.

Siegrain didn't move from his spot until she was upon him; then he grabbed the lapels of her open coat and pull her in close. Erza's breath caught. Immediately, she tipped her face up to be kissed but was forced to wait while Siegrain looked her over, dark eyes clinging to her body. There was an awed look in his eye. Releasing her coat, his fingers spider-walked inside the fabric and found her hips. Erza breathed out slowly while he laid his palms flat against her body and skimmed the chiffon material of her dress, plucking first at the band of her skimpy underwear, then moving up to linger at her dipping waist.

"You look beautiful." His voice was silk snagging on splinters, gentled by his kiss. While it was happening she wondered if she should let herself be kissed like this outside of the council building, but just as soon as the thought formed, it was obliterated by his insistent tongue. She opened her mouth for him and reveled.

He came back slowly and asked, "How do I ever let you go?"

Erza smiled. "We both have to work." Never mind that she hadn't taken a job since she'd started seeing him. She told herself that was because there wasn't anything good kicking around, not because she wanted to stay in Magnolia for as long as she could and soak up the attentions of a man she shouldn't be seeing.

"I suppose." He pushed her loose bangs back from her eyes. "We're still going to have dinner, but I have to stop by my place first."

"Your place?" Erza repeated with a quirk of her mouth. "Where you'll try to seduce me, Master Siegrain?"

"I though you already seduced? Should I try harder?"

Erza could hardly believe herself as she said, "Perhaps you could remind me?"

With a nice, slow smile he held out his arm for her to take. "It would be my pleasure."

It occurred to Jellal that taking Erza to his apartment was risky, but he was cocky and felt untouchable. Mounting the stairs with her hand in his, he relished the way her fingers kept flexing as she mentally scrolled through all the scenarios that might await her as soon as the door closed.

He planned on going through them all.

At his door, his hand was steady holding his keys, though his brow was slicked with sweat. For so many years he'd dreamed of this exact moment and yet he wasn't sure which part he was more excited for: seeing Erza entirely bare and doing what he wanted to her, or revealing his identity. Living under the guise of Siegrain was so frustratingly limited.

All of that is going to stop soon.

The door opened and the smell of parchment greeted them. Jellal watched Erza take in his abode. Bookshelves, a love seat and a small, square coffee table sat in the center of the room. On top of the table was a bowl of shiny red apples. The back wall was entirely windows, and beyond them was a long balcony; the drapes were open, revealing Magnolia's cityscape. In front of the windows was a large queen-sized bed adorned with a black and blue duvet.

Erza closed the door.

Then she locked it.

Jellal teased, "Should I be worried that you're locking me in, Titania?"

Confident again, Erza came to him, the chunky ankle high heeled boots she wore snapping over his wooden floor with authority. "I thought maybe that's what you wanted."

"I feel obligated to tell you that our dinner reservation is for quarter to eight." He made a play at checking his watch.

"That's hours away," Erza said, startled out of her coyness. "What were you planning on doing in the meantime?"

Jellal grinned wolfishly. "I thought you liked the attention?"

She settled back into the role of seductress fluidly. "By all means. Make use of your time."

Jellal stepped into her and worked her coat from her shoulders. Erza was pliant and accommodating, confident. Jellal threw her coat carelessly on his new coffee table. It half caught, then fell to the floor in a heap. "I was hoping that you'd say that "

Erza grabbed his coat and worked the toggle clasps, undoing them while Jellal found the hickey he'd left on her neck last night. He sucked hard, deepening the bruise. Erza whimpered; it must have hurt. She didn't stop him. A little dissatisfied, Jellal moved on, kissing down her neck, tongue caressing her skin now and again while he found the back of her dress and undid the clasp. The zipper came down, then the dress slid off her shoulders to reveal the strap of her black, lacy bra. The colour was so, so beautiful on her skin. The contrast. Jellal lived for it. He moved south over her collarbone to the tops of her breasts, tongue sneaking into the cup of her bra. Her nipples were hard, raised nubs that he teased. Erza pulled at his coat with renewed effort until it slid from his shoulders and dropped to the floor.

Unable to help himself, Jellal bit the top of her breast; the girl's breath died in her lungs. Her hands found his hair and dragged him up to her mouth again. He was all too happy to kiss her; she tasted sweet, she tasted like lip gloss, but most importantly, she tasted like Erza.

"Gods..." he mumbled against her mouth. I love you. "I've waited so long for this, Erza." I hate you.

"A night?" she teased between kisses.

Jellal's stomach flopped. "Years." He bit her lip.

Erza laughed off his admission while he kissed across her jaw to her ear and nibbled on the lobe. "I think you're being dramatic."

Jellal swallowed a frustrated groan and grabbed her breast roughly, consequentially pushing her against the wall. Knowing that she was trapped there under his body weight was exhilarating. Between his legs was so hard it was uncomfortable. "All this time, you're all I've thought about. I can't stop." Erza Scarlet.

Erza

Scarlet.

And her

"Your scarlet hair." He fisted one hand in her hair, tugging at the single braid that rested over her shoulder, and rocked his hips against hers so she could feel how he strained against his pants. "Erza... After you left... I didn't think I would see you again."

A long beat of silence passed in which Erza was immobile while he kissed her neck. Finally, she said in a deadpan voice, "I don't know if you're trying to be funny, but stop."

He pulled back and looked at her with serious eyes. "It's no joke. I can't pretend anymore." Coming back, he kissed her lips; her mouth was sedentary. With shaking hands, he grabbed her dress and pulled it down further to her belly button, then knelt and kissed the sensitive skin at her waist.

"Jellal?" Erza said his name; it didn't come out as sweetly as he imagined, it got stuck in her throat. He loved the sound of it no less.

"Yes."

Yes. Yes.

The illusion had been shattered.