I'M BACK! I know, this is SO exciting, right? Yeah, so, it's been… quite a while, hasn't it, dear readers? I hope you're still with me. Anyways, let's skip the excuses and partially valid explanation part, and hope that you don't kill me. This chapter is really short, but is so for a reason. You'll see at the end. It's kind of a setup for the next chapter, which will be epic. I do not own Glee, Wicked, or Madonna and her music, so don't try to sue me.

Rachel's POV

"So, Rachel, do you mind explaining to me why you three girls assaulted us with questions? Also, why was Quinn in cat makeup?" asked Jesse once we had arrived home. We were lying next to each other on the bed.

"It's a long story, Jess," I said, fighting back the laughter that I would later learn to be a reflex whenever someone brought up that situation.

"I've got time," he countered.

"You may have time, but that doesn't mean I have to tell you."

"Please?"

"No. My strong feminism gives me the power to not bend to your will."

"I'm not sure if Madonna is a good or a bad influence on you."

"She hasn't affected me that much, considering that you're older than me, and not younger. Plus, while she did write Papa Don't Preach, she didn't have a teenage pregnancy."

"True, you aren't a cougar."

"But you are."

"Rachel, I must respectfully disagree. You can only be a cougar if you're a woman. Plus, I'm pretty sure 18 is a little young to be considered a cougar."

"For the sake of my enjoyment, you're a cougar."

"Are you sure you're calling me that for humor, and not to seem dirty so you'll rank higher on the Glist if it ever comes back?"

"I don't even want to think about the damn list that Qu-een of Drama wrote!"

Quinn may have told Puck, Tina, and I that she wrote the Glist, but Jesse and Artie didn't know. We'd all gotten over it by that point, but since we were already in a dramatic situation, we decided it would be best to not tell Jesse.

"You know who wrote it?"

"No."

"Liar."

"I deny that accusation."

"I deny your denial of my accusation."

"I deny your denial of my denial of your accusation."

"I deny your denial of your denial of my denial of my accusation."

"I deny your denial of my denial of my denial of your denial of your accusation."

"Rachel, are we even making sense?"

"Probably not."

"Who wrote the Glist?"

"I would tell you if I knew."

"Then tell me."

"Once again, I play the feminist card."

"Rachel."

"Jesse."

"Berry."

"St. James."

"St. Berry!" we both chuckled. Yes, we were both fully aware of our assigned couple name. Finn and Santana, the two main people opposed to our relationship, started referring to us as St. Berry, instead of using our names. Ours was silly, but at least it wasn't as horrible as Puckleberry, or as subjected to jokes as Quick and Mantana. (For example: Why did Quinn and Puck have a baby at 16? Because they do things Quickly. Why is Matt African-American? When he's with Santana, the Man-tan-a.)

"Please tell me who wrote the Glist, Rachel. I'm not mad about it anymore. While the Glist was a stupid thing to write, whoever did it probably didn't mean for anything like what happened to happen."

"Promise you won't get mad?"
"I promise."

"Quinn."

"What about her?"

"Quinn wrote the Glist."

"Seriously?"

"Yes. Are you mad?"

"No," he said, and I could tell that he was being sincere.

"Good, because if you were mad, she'd slap me. Well, since I'm pregnant, she's give me an I.O.U. for a hard slapping."

"Yeah," he laughed, but I could tell it was forced.

"Is something wrong, Jesse?"

"No."

"Now you're lying to me."

"Why would you ever think that?"

"Because I'm extremely talented in the art of reading you. In fact, your face might as well be the script of Wicked."

"Rach-

"What are you hiding from me Jesse?"

Jesse's POV

"What are you hiding from me Jesse?"

"Nothing," I lied, while truthfully, I was feeling guilty. You might be thinking that I promised Rachel that I wouldn't feel guilty, but that was an entirely different matter. I was feeling guilty because Rachel had told me the secret that she and Quinn were hiding, but I could never tell her the secret Quinn and I were hiding. If Puck and Rachel ever figured out what Quinn and I had found out a couple of days ago, we would all be screwed.

Cliffhanger! Review if you don't completely hate me for the lack of posting and the cliffy!