Hey all! This took me entirely way too long, but here it is at last. I hope to have more tomorrow. I plan on doing something differnet for Beth's birth. While on the show it was beautiful - I have my own vision of how it would have happen. Anyway, please continue to read and review :)
Quinn pressed her lips against Puck's, letting herself savor this moment. The Rabbi looked at both of them and smiled. Was this moment real? Everything that happened over the past few years, Quinn couldn't believe she was standing in a wedding dress - getting married to Noah Puckerman. It was a small ceremony - only about 20 people or so. They didn't want anything too extravagant. Quinn's mother was there, doing her best to be supportive. She still held a bit of resentment that Quinn had given away her granddaughter.
There life had seemed so sweet and perfect, but it didn't take long for their marriage to fail. The one thing their marriage never lacked was love; it was just everything else that screwed them up. Quinn loved Puck with her whole heart, but she was damaged.
After they parted, Puck held Quinn's hand tightly as they walked down the aisle - husband and wife. Quinn was sure this was life she wanted, and it was certainly the life she needed. Puck was the only person in the world who could help her overcome the pain and the sadness. They loved each other. While it wasn't always perfect, this marriage would be Quinn's saving grace.
"I love you, Q." Puck whispered in her ear.
Quinn stood up on her tippy toes and placed a kiss on his nose. "I love you too, Puckerman."
Their first together was magical. He held her close and Quinn breathed in the familiar scent of his perfume. They had the perfect song - a classic. "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes" by the Platters. Quinn always did love the oldies. As they danced together, it reminded Quinn of old times. Back when he would dance with her in his living room - her big belly a barrier between them.
"Thank you." Quinn said. Puck looked confused, not sure why she was thanking him. "I mean, thanks for never giving up on me, or us."
He kissed her forehead. "I could never give up on you."
A damaged person couldn't be in love.
It didn't matter what he said or how much he did, nothing would ever replace Beth. It killed Quinn that she was unable to forget and move on, but she did always want her baby.
Now with Shelby asking her to come to New York, Quinn wasn't sure if she could handle it. Meeting Beth was something Quinn dreamed of, but she was terrified. What if Beth resented her? What if she didn't love her? Quinn had so many insecurities and she needed someone to tell her it was going to be okay.
Quinn wiped her eyes, trying to hold back the tears. She wanted to hold her baby girl again.
Puck looked over at the women sleeping next to him. He wasn't even entirely sure what her name was. It made him sick. What kind of man had he become? He quietly slipped out of bed, careful not to wake the sleeping women. Puck quickly put on his jeans and t-shirt. He was out the door before she even realized he was awake.
It wasn't the life Puck wanted, but what choice did he have left? Every person he had ever loved was gone. His mom and sister didn't want anything to do him with. After Quinn – things became rough and Puck changed. If only he still had Quinn. Puck wasn't naïve – he knew they had problems. Probably more then most couples, but it didn't matter – he fucking loved her.
Every woman before Quinn and after didn't matter. They were just nameless faces he used to make the pain go away. With Beth's thirteenth birthday coming up, it only made the pain worse. Puck wanted to be able to grieve with Quinn. They both understood what it felt like to have an empty space in your heart.
Puck observed the already bustling city. It was 5am and already the world was out and about. He couldn't help but think back to Lima and how much he missed it. New York was a great place to live and be free, but Puck felt alone there. He wanted to be back home – with a family.
He wanted to be with Quinn.
Beth kept playing her father's song on repeat. It was the only source of comfort she had. She couldn't help but feel silly, but Beth felt more alone then ever before. Sure, her mom was amazing, but she still longed for her parents.
Shelby knocked on the door – causing Beth to forget about what was bothering her. "Are you doing okay, baby?"
Beth sighed and threw her iPod to the side of her bed. "Not really," she didn't want to bring this up to her mother. "I – I have so many questions."
Shelby understood exactly what her daughter was going through. "I think it is time I tell you something." She breathed out a steady breath. The tears were already beginning to form in her eyes. "I had a baby once…"
Beth looked shocked. "I was young and had a silly dream. I met these two men who wanted to adopt a baby and I let them. She was the most beautiful baby ever and I let her go."
Shelby was crying now. It was hard to talk about Rachel, but maybe it would help Beth. "I met her when she was 16 – the same year I adopted you. I thought when I found her that everything would be perfect, but she wasn't the baby I gave up – she was a woman."
Beth was also crying. She never realized what her mother had gone through. It made her feel selfish. Why couldn't she be satisfied with the life Shelby had given her? "I – I adopted you and wanted to start over. You are my baby and I love you."
The mother and daughter embraced each other and hugged. They softly cried for a few minutes before Shelby pulled away. She wiped her eyes and gave Beth a smile. "I understand your need to meet your birth mom and I want you to have that."