Hearts of Lions and Metal Men

90909

15 years later

90909

You've been sick for quite some time, but you've been afraid to tell them about it, because despite what she says, Veronica is still quite the fragile little thing. You wouldn't want to scare her over nothing.

So you decided not to tell anyone about the cancer until you were sure there was nothing you could do about it.

Then, you were waiting for the right time.

Now it seems the choice has been made for you.

You wake in a hospital bed, with Logan and Veronica standing over you, Logan holding her shaking form close to him, and both glaring at you.

"What's the haps?" you try, weakly.

It doesn't get the desired effect from either of them.

Logan continues to glare, albeit awkwardly, and Veronica breaks down in tears.

"Why didn't you tell us?" she sobs, letting Logan turn her so she's buried her face in his chest.

You sigh.

"There wasn't anything the doctors could do, Veronica. We caught it too late. And I didn't need you stressed out about me, not when you've got enough to worry about already."

You know they see the logic in your statement; no one needed Veronica under any more stress while she gave birth to her third child three years ago, around the same time you were diagnosed. And after that, she's been so stressed taking care of little Lynn that no one has dared give her bad news. The little girl had so many health problems as a baby that people were scared she wouldn't make it, and not long after her second birthday, Veronica had a miscarriage, and had been in a rather fragile state ever since.

She doesn't want to agree with you, so you stop arguing, choosing instead to ask where your little god-babies are.

There are three. Daniel, the oldest, is eight, and his two sisters, Anna (after Logan's grandmother), and Lynn, are six and three respectively.

Little Lynn, who never sits still, is the first to make it on to your bead. Daniel and Anna are right behind her.

You smile at the little gifts from heaven. It took Logan and Veronica so long to get pregnant. They had to go to more doctors than you've ever seen in your life, and after diagnosing Veronica with PID, and scarring on her ovaries, they decided to adopt. So they got Daniel from a nearby agency, and Anna from an orphanage in Romania, and then, after they'd decided two was enough, little Lynn was born.

She was the little miracle baby that the doctors told them they'd never have. And they almost didn't. Veronica come close to losing Lynn on several occasions, even after being put on strict bed rest for the duration of the pregnancy.

And once the baby was born, she had all sorts of health problems, from low birth weight to severe anemia. You can't count the number of times Veronica called you crying because Lynn was in the hospital again.

You can't count the number of times you wished it had been you on that goddamn plane. Keith would have known how to comfort her through all the trips to the doctors over the past several years. You doubt anything you said to her was remotely close to what she needed to hear, but they seemed content to let you believe it was.

90909

"Hey Veronica, what's the haps?" you asked, walking into her kitchen. You didn't know what was going on with her, but Logan told you that she needed to talk to you, and wouldn't ask you herself.

All you knew was that she'd been to the doctor more in the last year than she ever had in her entire life. And she wouldn't tell you why. You'd managed to keep calm about it; to not crowd her or insist on answers, but now you were getting worried.

And when she broke down in response to your simple question, you fought back your own panic, taking her in your arms.

"What is it, honey, what's going on?"

And she told you. About all the doctors, all the second opinions, all the people she'd had to let poke her and prod at her, and all for this same answer.

She couldn't have kids.

It would be a miracle if she ever got pregnant, and another miracle if she carried the baby to term.

The biggest miracle would be if she didn't die giving birth.

You didn't know what to do. You didn't know what to say.

It took you three weeks to come up with a solution.

She was laying on the couch, watching the blank TV screen when you went to see her, and she didn't even hear you knock. You used your key to get in, and rushed to her side, taking her hands in your own, and chafing them lightly to bring her back to your world.

"Veronica, honey? Sit up, talk to me for a bit."

Dully, she obeyed. Dully is the best way to describe everything about her since she'd gotten the news.

You pulled her to your chest, and held her tight for just a few moments.

"I know this is a touchy subject, Veronica, but have you considered adoption? There's a lot of kids out there that need parents."

It was such a simple, obvious thing, that you half-expected her to slap you. But when her long silence brought your eyes to her face, you saw that she was looking at you like you were a genius.

"We… we could adopt!"

And then her face broke into a smile, and she kissed you lightly on the cheek, and ran to get her cell phone, giggling.

A year and a half later, they went to Los Angeles to get Daniel Keith Echolls.

90909

The kids call you Uncle Don. You are Uncle Don, and they have their Uncle Wallace and Aunt Sarah and Uncle Darryl and Aunt Gracie, and Nana 'Licia, and Mommy and Daddy, and Uncle Dick and Aunt Mac, and Uncle Eli, who's bringing Aunt Maris and the cousins over to play with them tomorrow…

At least according to Anna. You could be wrong; her sense of time is always a little off. Tomorrow could mean next week or yesterday. But you smile and nod like the dutiful uncle you are, not bothering to tell her that you already know exactly who her family members are. You're not quite listening to her litany; you already know it by heart, and frankly, you're getting tired. But that's to be expected.

You have been in the hospital for a week, and you're not getting any better.

You knew this. You haven't been getting any better for quite some time.

Veronica's taking it hard; she always takes losing someone hard. When Deputy Sachs was killed in the line of duty, she took it very hard, even though she wasn't as close to the man as she was to some.

Yesterday, the doctors told you that the treatments had stopped working altogether, and you opted not to try the newest experimental drugs.

You were long overdue for some peace.

Not that you didn't love it here with your family, but in all honesty, you were ready to see Keith and Sachs again.

And Mandi. You were beyond ready to see her again.

You're just not sure how to leave these people you've grown to love behind.

90909

"Veronica, are you sure you're okay? You're really pale sweetie," Alicia said. You and the Fennel's were helping Veronica with some shopping, and then you'd be taking Darryl and Daniel out to watch the game.

But you weren't happy about leaving Veronica. She'd been so sick in the past month that she ended up passing the reigns of the Balboa county PD to Leo. She'd seemed to be doing better, but now? She belonged in a hospital.

You didn't have any more time to dwell on it though, because in the next second, Veronica fell to the ground, and you dove forward to catch her little body.

She didn't wake up until she was in the hospital, where the doctor told you that she was already 4 months pregnant, and needed to take it easy for the next five months, when they'd do a C-section.

Part of you was relieved and part of you was terrified to tell Veronica that she had to stay in bed until the baby was born.

You just got her to stop hating you, you didn't want her to start again.

90909

Your periods of lucidity grow less, and the time you spend in a dreamworld with swirls of love ones lost grow.

One day, you open up your eyes to Veronica standing over you.

Logan is beside her, and all around you are the people you love. Your whole family.

"You know what you need to do, baby," you hear Logan tell his sobbing wife.

Veronica, don't cry. I'll always love you.

She nods and puts on her brave-little-toaster smile, and reaches out to squeeze your hand.

"I want you to stay here, Don. With us. With me. But – there's someone waiting for you… and I think you need to be with her again. So – go."

And it's like a spell is broken. You don't think about how Veronica knew about Mandi, you don't think about much of anything.

You're suddenly in front of a gate attached to a white picket fence, and a young woman and a blond little girl are running from a beach house to greet you.

And you smile.

"Mandi."

You pick her up in your ethereal arms, and it's like no time has passed since you last saw her.

Your mother embraces you both.

"Welcome home, Lion." The little girl giggles.

You're not the tin man anymore.

"You've always had a lion's heart."