A Better Idea
Chapter Five
The northern Wyoming light was quickly fading as Ennis and Jack walked back toward the house. It's not smart to step around in the pasture after dark; they had both grown up knowing this little fact of life. You don't want to plant your foot on a snake, or find a prairie dog hole unexpected like.
As they walked the land near the house and barn, they had been talking about what needed to be done tomorrow, and where Ennis might find the tools and supplies necessary to get the job done. He was looking forward to being able to do something for Jack. Something concrete. Something of value. They had lined out more work than one man could possibly do in a day, but that was how Ennis wanted it. He still had Sunday morning to finish up a few things before he headed back home to his real life, and his job at the ranch.
"Real life?" thought Ennis. He could not help remembering Jack's many words on the subject. When they'd first got back together, Jack had asked "You and Alma, that's a life?", and more recently, "you want a live your miserable, fuckin' life, you go right ahead!". I wonder what my real life is, he thought. I know I only feel half alive when I'm not with Jack.
"Where does your girlfriend think you are this weekend, Cowboy?" Jack wondered aloud.
"My what?" gasped Ennis.
"The waitress who wants to go to nursing school, where did you tell her you was going?" repeated Jack, half aggravated.
"Didn't tell her nothin', Jack. And she wasn't my girlfriend. That's kinda over before it started anyway, tell you the truth." Admitted Ennis.
"That was fast, when did you have time to break it off with her, Ennis? It was you, wasn't it that called it off?" Jack pushed for some answers.
"Well, knowin' you, Jack; you want all the gory details don't you?" Ennis stated knowingly. "It was like this, I was so tore up over you, and what I'd done and said out there, that I was in some kinda state, I can tell you. So when she walked up to me, all questioning like, there in the diner that night, I just had no answer for her and she finally went away."
"She just went away?" said Jack.
"Yeah, I told you, she went away. Cryin' like." Ennis spoke so softly that Jack had a hard time hearing the last bit.
"Jack, can we not talk about her anymore? I'm not proud of how I treated her. The truth is, my mind was never with Cassie. I was not interested in bein' who she wanted me to be."
Ennis turned the tables. "What about you? Did you call your neighbor's wife and let her know you are going to be delayed a few days or weeks?"
"Hell, you know I didn't, Ennis!" cried Jack.
"Why not, isn't she expecting you to "slip off to see her" at some point?"
accused Ennis.
"Whoa, where is this coming from Ennis? Are we having another fight? I am here in Lightning Flat; the man I want and need is by my side. I just want to enjoy this time with you. Okay? Can we do that? Please?"
"You're right, Jack, I'm sorry. Let's not waste time talkin' about other people. I'm here with you, and that's just where I want to be." affirmed Ennis. "No more talk about any girlfriend, okay then?"
Jack looked for some reassurance, "Are we good, then?"
"Yes, Jack, but.…um … Okay, here goes," Ennis breathed out nervously, "How do you want to handle the sleeping arrangements, bud? I don't want to sleep without you, Jack, not unless we're forced to. I sure don't want to impose on your mother's hospitality at this time when she's so worried about your dad. 'Sides, I wouldn't offend that lady for the world. How'd she feel with her son sleeping with a rough as a cob ranch hand, right under her roof? It just ain't right. You know I got my bedroll with me, and you got that tent…."
"You 'bout through yet, Ennis Del Mar?" demanded Jack. "Christ, I never heard that many words out a you all last week, Cowboy." Then Jack smiled that sidelong grin at Ennis, so he'd know he was just pokin' a little fun at him.
Jack turned to Ennis and took him in his arms. He was getting chilly so he assumed Ennis was too, he rubbed his hands up and down Ennis' arms to warm him. Ennis turned his face up to Jack, wanting a kiss, and was rewarded as he'd hoped. Slowly, softly they let down their guard, smoothed all the bristles and hackles, and melted into the kiss. This was warm, familiar territory, home to both. Their breathing slowed and eased.
Ennis slid his hands down inside the back of Jack's jeans, and cupped his cold butt with both hands. "Feels like a goddamn meat locker down there, Twist. Want me to warm you up some?" Ennis offered suggestively.
"Yes, I surely do, but we have unfinished business to talk about first; about your sleeping arrangements. Remember?"
"Oh yeah, me bein' here's posin' a big problem, ain't it?" offered Ennis.
"No and Hell No, Ennis. Mama 'n me decided this morning about all that. Upstairs across from my room is a big room we use for visitors staying over. Mama has a LOT of kinfolk, Ennis. There's also some attic storage. Anyway, there's two double beds in there and mama had me make one a them up for you this morning. I put clean sheets on it, and I even fluffed your pillas."
Ennis: "You did?"
Jack: "I did."
Ennis: "Well, there ya go! All settled, ain't it? Where'll you be, Jack?"
Jack: "Right beside you, Cowboy."
"Now, I know it's getting' late, but if you ain't too tired, Ennis, I got somethin' I want a show ya. It's here in the barn," Jack said, leading the way. When he got to the ladder to the hay mow, Jack began to climb.
"It's up there, is it? What is it, Jack?" Ennis asked suspiciously.
"You'll see, Ennis, just quit arguing for once, will ya?" Jack asked, aggrieved again.
Once up in the hay mow, they could see for miles from the open hay door, the stars looked close enough to touch. Jack pulled down a blanket he had put up there this morning for this very purpose. He spread it out and motioned for Ennis to sit down and be comfortable. Ennis stubbornly continued to stand, waiting for Jack to sit first.
Jack took Ennis' face in both his hands and kissed him tenderly, lingering over his lips hungrily, but very softly.
"Ennis, please sit down, I have somethin' to say to ya and you're not making it any easier on me just standin' there." pleaded Jack.
Ennis looked seriously into Jack's face, wonderin' what was comin' but only said, "awwright." And he sat.
Jack began, "I don't know how to say to you all that I feel, Ennis. First of all, I am so grateful that you are here. You came here for no other reason than to help me, and that's a real friend." He continued, "I'm so grateful that you're even speakin' to me after what I done . ."
"Wait just a goddamn minute" began Ennis, standing up again.
"No Ennis" interrupted Jack, holding his hand in front of Ennis' face to forestall him talking once again. He turned Ennis toward the blanket and a seated position once again "Sit down, please, let me say my piece and then you can talk or punch my lights out or whatever you're aimin' to do."
Resuming, Jack said "Uh, Ennis, I never meant all them things I said to you up there last week. My feelings was hurt, I was disappointed about August, but I had no right to jump on you like I did. I wish I could take it all back. Ennis, can you ever forgive me?"
Ennis stands up again, "Goddamn it Jack, it was me that was in the wrong. I know why you said all them things, and I don't blame you one bit. I been kickin' my ass for five days over that."
"You have?" asked Jack.
"You bet I have. So you just take your shot at kickin' it too. I deserve it." mourned Ennis.
"Okay." said Jack. "I'm still grateful as hell that you're here, and willing to help me out, Ennis."
Ennis: "Jack, lemme tell you somethin'. If there's EVER a time that you need me, you don't hafta ask twice, bud. I'll be there."
Jack: "I know that, Ennis, but thanks for sayin' it. So. You forgive me?"
Ennis: "Yes. You forgive me?"
Jack: "Yes."
Ennis: "Then what'd you want to show me up here?"
"I just wanted to show you how sorry I was for everything. 'n how glad I am that you're here." replied Jack.
"Hmm, how glad ARE you that I'm here?" Ennis asked, smiling at Jack.
"Well, if you'll stop your infernal pacing, I'll show you." Jack said.
Together they unbuttoned each other's clothing, pulled it off piece by piece, while they hummed a little strip tease music. They laughed. They hung everything on nails to keep out any curious critters, then stretched themselves out on the blanket together at last.
"Look, Jack, there's the same moon that we saw rising last week when we was in the meadow. Oh, I didn't get you any purty flowers for your hair tonight, darlin' " teased Ennis. "Jack?"
Jack didn't answer, he was busy concentrating on the splendid sight before him, Ennis' naked body. He began trailing kisses from the tender spot behind Ennis' ear, down his neck to his chest, and continuing down the interesting and lovely strip of dark hair. By the time Jack got to the trail's end he could tell how happy Ennis was to see him.
Ennis, catching his breath, said "Oh god, Jack, I can't take too much a that tonight, tired as I am. Flip around here, handsome, and lemme give you some a your own medicine."
The two lovers were in no hurry, and each made sure that his partner's needs were met, and then some. In their present mood of relief from all that had happened in their lives this past week, each man wanted to give more than he received, and the result was head to toe lovin'. That's what they named it, Head To Toe Lovin'.
"You know what I like best, Cowboy?" asked Jack.
Ennis: "No, what?"
Jack: "I like lookin' at you, Ennis, all a you."
Ennis: "You must need glasses then. You are the fine specimen of a man that I want to feast my eyes on, Jack."
Their voices were getting quieter and drowsier, they were lying on the blanket, arms and legs entwined, and their foreheads were together.
"C'mon Cowboy, time to get goin' " urged Jack.
Ennis: "uh? Where?"
"Let's go to bed, we don't want to be flappin' our nakedness for all the world to see, now do we?" reasoned Jack.
Ennis had been up for almost 24 hours straight, and he was getting some downtime when he felt wet, sloppy kisses landing on his toes, his nose, his belly button .. Ennis was liking that too much, so Jack changed his tactics to nips and nibbles.
Ennis: "Okay, okay. I'm getting dressed."
They slipped into the house, crept up the stairs like teenagers out past curfew, and got into the big double bed at Jack's house.
End of chapter 5