A Better Idea
Chapter Eleven
Jack came out of the bathroom; Ennis walked over to him, put both his arms around him and kissed him, thoroughly. "Hmmm, minty fresh." said Ennis.
Jack: "What was that for?"
Ennis: "Oh, just something your mother told me to do."
Jack: "What? Why, where is she?"
Ennis: "More coffee, Jack?"
Jack: "Sure, if you're havin' some, Ennis."
So while they had the last of the coffee, Ennis filled Jack in on what his mother had said about this morning being her gift to them, and how generous and loving she was to Ennis. He was almost overcome, retelling it.
"I have to tell ya, Ennis, I'm seeing a new side of my mother since my dad had that stroke. She says what she thinks, speaks right up no matter what. It's been an experience I never thought I'd live to see."
"She doesn't want to see us waste our lives, Jack. No more time, neither.
So what are we going to do with this gift of ours? It's up to us 100 percent"
Jack: "I think better when I'm walkin' Ennis. Let's go outside. Okay?"
As they strolled across the barn yard toward the pasture, they hung their arms around each other's hips and hooked thumbs into belt loops. They looked like what they were, two happy people, talking, waving their free hands in the air, laughing, stopping to drop random kisses on eyes, nose, mouth, neck . . . and then to walk again.
They were remembering some of their happiest times, and some of their silliest misadventures. They had a lifetime of them saved up, and rarely felt they had a chance like this to revisit them; a picture album of vivid images, the scenes so well-remembered.
Suddenly, Jack sobered, and looked at Ennis. "Can you come back next weekend, Ennis? Will you be able to?"
"Ever since I got here, Jack, I've been figuring out how I could do it. Come back again, I mean. There's a couple a problems with it, but I might be able to work something out. My horses is one problem," he continued. "I have'em boarded and I go on the weekends to clean out their stalls, brush'em down, talk to'em, and exercise them. It'll cost extra if I have Theo do all that as well as feed and water them every day. But it could be arranged I s'pose."
Jack asked, "What other problems would ya have if ya were to come back?"
Naming his biggest issue, Ennis said, "Well, on some weekends I see my girls. I would miss them like the devil if I didn't see them ever' once in awhile. Right now I only see them once a month, Jack. I can't give up my time with Junior and Jenny."
Apparently, once Jack got started, there was no stopping his imagination at work. "Could you visit with them during the week, Ennis? Cook them dinner, or go for a drive, or go get an ice cream? Say on a Tuesday or Thursday? Would that work just as well, Cowboy? Hell, you could even put in a couple a horse shoe pits and you could all play horse shoes while you grill up a hot dog or hamburger or somethin' . "
Ennis got so tickled, visualizing his spindly armed little girls heaving big clumsy horseshoes, he got the giggles. Explaining it to Jack, it just didn't sound as funny. But still the tears ran down his face.
"Hell Ennis, then make it Washers. They are light weight, and don't take up no space at all. That's a better idea." claimed Jack.
"That really could work, Jack," agreed Ennis, "it'll be summer soon and they won't have school the next day. I plan on seein' them this week, if I can."
Ennis was brain-storming out loud, "Maybe I could do some a the horse care and conditionin' on week nights too, I'll have to see if they'd allow me to come after hours."
Jack: "Sure, that might do it, Ennis, uh, OH wait! Hell, Ennis why don't you bring your horses up here? You could see them and take care a them on weekends, and during the week, I could do the daily stuff. They know me; they are certainly used to being around me."
"Are you sure, Jack?" asked Ennis, "Isn't that going to be tough on you when you have so much to do for your parents; especially when your dad gets home?"
And so it was settled. Ennis would come back. They had worked it out to the best solutions, and Jack was satisfied that his Cowboy would be by his side again soon.
"Okay, Jack, I'm satisfied that I can see my girls during the week, and my horses are going to be up here waiting for me. The next question we have to solve is, what do we do about Bobby?" asked Ennis.
"Uh, Ennis? Bobby's daddy needs some lookin' after right about now, and we can think about and talk about Bobby, in front of my mama, but we can't do this in front of her …. Mmmm." Jack started kissing Ennis while unbuttoning his shirt trying to get at skin as quickly as possible.
As if the bottom has fallen outa the sky, big fat rain drops started pelting them: head, shoulders, arms, every available surface. "Shit, that's cold!" yelled Jack, and he started running for the barn, with Ennis trailing. In a flash, Ennis passed him up and got to the barn first, opening the big door for Jack, and then as if by unspoken agreement, he headed for the ladder up to the hay mow.
Their blanket was still there, they shook it out good; again they hung their clothes on a nail, and again stretched out alongside one another to touch, kiss, taste and love. Making love on a rainy morning is the stuff of movies and love songs, but it was theirs for the taking, and they made full use of the privilege.
There was nothing they wouldn't do for each other and nothing they didn't try; exhausted, and chest heaving, Jack asked, "Do ya give up?"
Ennis, lying flat on his back with no ability to move a muscle, gave a mile-wide grin, and cried, "Uncle, uncle."
"Thank god" said Jack, "if you wanted any more I'd a had to hire it done." With that said, he fell over on his back, and lay still as the dead.
Ennis roused himself enough to get up on his elbow, lean over Jack and kiss his mouth. "Jack Fuckin' Twist, whatever would I do without you?"
Jack smiled. "You kinda like me, don'tcha Cowboy?"
"Yah, you'll do in a pinch." laughed Ennis.
Ennis turned his back to Jack, and was rewarded with Jack spooning up behind him. Ennis settled his head on Jack's arm and they rested and dozed that way for about 30 minutes.
Feeling his strength returning, Ennis said, "Jack this is nothin' like any other time we've ever had together. I'm tellin' you, bud, I'm likin' havin' family around, livin' in a house, havin' time together. I never knew it could be like this."
Jack quickly replied, "Me neither."
He continued, "Don't get me wrong, Ennis, I'll keep meetin' you out on the mountain till hell freezes over, especially if we have weeks like we just had last time. But I've always hoped we could have something closer to a life together. This weekend makes it seem even more real, even more doable."
They snuggled a bit closer, and held on tight. The time for Ennis' departure was creeping up on them, and they couldn't hold it at bay forever. Jack squeezed Ennis like he never wanted to let him go.
Ennis turned his face a bit toward Jack, and quietly said "I know, baby."
For five more minutes they put off the inevitable, kissing, and caressing faces, ears, necks and mouths. "Goddamit to hell, Ennis," said Jack, "I hate to see you go home and leave me here without you."
"Me too." said Ennis. "But I guess, the quicker I go, the quicker I can get back."
The rain had stopped for the time being, they dressed and got to the business of gathering up whatever Ennis had brought with him. He hadn't unpacked much, as they had most of what he needed except for a few personal items. His truck and gear were ready for him to drive off, whenever they finished the noon meal with Jack's mother.
The meal might be a bust, in spite of the delicious smells coming out of the oven, thought Ennis. He was feelin' the same ol' gut cramps that he always did when he knew he had to leave Jack. They weren't as bad, because he knew he was coming back next weekend, but still it was a hollow place in him that could only be filled by his Jack.
Upstairs, they realized that the room showed signs of having been recklessly used by a band of hooligans. They opened some windows, thinking the room could use an airing out. They stripped the sheets off the bed for the laundry, and they shook and folded the blankets, placing them in the blanket box at the foot of the bed. Jack took the "barber" chair back down to the dining room, smiling as he remembered the Naked Haircut,
Ennis grabbed the glass, comb, scissors, and towels, and took them downstairs to the appropriate places. He quickly washed up their breakfast dishes and set them to drain dry. He swept the dining room, then peeked into the roasting pan in the oven. Oh my, that smells good, he thought.
"Did you get you a nice shower, darlin' ? I have time for one too?" checked Ennis. So saying, he went into the steamy room and took a quick shower.
Jack went upstairs and swept the floor of the room where he had been so happy for the past two nights. Everything personal had been removed and once again it looked like an unused guest and storage room. But Jack would never again view it like that. It's the room where he climbed into bed beside Ennis Del Mar, slept through the nights, waking at sunup next to his Cowboy.
Scrubbed clean and fresh from their showers, Jack and Ennis, shaved and dressed in clean clothes. They were ready to face the world, but in no hurry to rejoin civilization. What they wanted was to spend the last bit of their time together, holding each other while talking quietly.
The ideal site would be a front porch, which unfortunately didn't exist, or a stairway wide enough to sit back to chest, one step lower than the other, with arms around the shoulders and holding on possessively.
They decided to go back to their hay mow, with a view onto the world. They propped up a bale of hay behind their blanket so they could sit snuggled one against the other, and talk or not, as they wished.
Ennis said, "Jack, you know what this place needs?"
"No, what?" asked Jack.
"A front porch for us to sit on like this, on a rainy day or a sunny day." said Ennis. "Actually, it would mean a lot for your dad to be able to get outside on a nice day, too. What do you say we build him a porch?"
"You know, that's a great idea, Ennis. We'll get started on that early this summer, okay? That would probably be a good project for Bobby to help with."
"Speaking of Bobby," said Ennis, "what do you think you're going to do or say to Lureen, about him coming up here?"
"Guess I'll just suggest that he come up for a few weeks. If she agrees with that, I'll find out when his school ends exactly, and then make a plan." replied Jack. "Since I can't call you, do you want to call me on Wednesday night, or
Thursday night to see if there's an update, or if I need you to bring something with you?"
"Yes, Jack. Depending on when I can get my girls, I'll give you a call one a those two nights. On Thursday after I get off from the ranch, I'll have to go get Scarlet and Gray from Theo's place, and let him know they won't be back for awhile. This month's already paid anyway.
Walter's Ford station wagon appeared on the gravel road turning into the Twist property, Ennis and Jack looked at each other, and sighed.
Time's up. The world is at our doorstep again, time to say good-bye. It was agonizing again. A person would think that this got easier, but it doesn't. They stood up.
Jack grabbed Ennis hard, clutched his arms around him and said "Christ, this is hard, it's killin' me to say good-bye to you, Cowboy."
Ennis was shaken; he was full of feelings of loss, and he hadn't even left yet. He pulled away from his man far enough to see his beloved face, he kissed Jack and clung there, like he was being dragged away by unseen forces. Ennis cupped the back of Jack's head, pulled back so he could see his face, and said "I'll be back, darlin' , I love you somethin' awful."
Jack was overcome to finally hear the words he had waited a lifetime for. He looked at Ennis, but for once was speechless.
Ennis: "I was wrong, Jack, that time I told you it was a one shot thing we had goin' on. Turns out, it's a powerful, Forever Shot thing we got goin' on here."
It took them a few minutes to hang onto each other and try to calm their emotions. They couldn't face Jack's mom, down there in her own kitchen now, looking as they did. They looked stricken, heartshot, and sad. They had to snap out of it, for her sake if for no other reason.
Jack took a deep, shuddering breath, straightened his spine, and asked Ennis, "Well, do I haf to drag your sorry ass down that ladder? We got us a Sunday dinner to eat."
Ennis shot out ahead of him, and bolted down the ladder to the main floor of the barn, yelling "Last one in's a Sheep Herder!"
The dinner went well; everything was delicious, as expected. Claire carefully packed up leftovers for Ennis to take home with him, to reheat for his supper. She also packed him some cold drinks for the drive.
There wasn't much conversation at the table, but Jack did remember to tell his mother how Ennis had come up with the idea to build a front porch onto the house, for dad to have a place where he could get outside. A relief for a man who has spent most of his life outdoors. Claire agreed that it was a fine suggestion. She promised to think about it, to see if there was any reason they should not do it. Maybe this project is just what John needs to engage his mind on somethin', she thought.
Jack realized that he hadn't mentioned Bobby coming up for the summer. Well, once Ennis was on the road, he would talk to her about that. He could not actually suggest it to Lureen, if it wouldn't be practical for mama.
Claire refused any help from Ennis, she told him she'd see to the cleaning up later.
Hanging his head, Ennis said, "Well then, looks like it's that time, I'd best get on the road."
On the porch, Claire hugged him fiercely, and holding his head against her shoulder, she spoke into his ear, "You make sure you come back next weekend, you hear? We'll be waiting for you. Drive safe, my boy."
With tears in his eyes, Ennis replied, "Yes ma'm. I sure will, Thank you for everything, ma'm."
Jack patiently waited while those two said their good-byes, then he stepped off the porch. He walked Ennis to his truck and took him in his arms. Jack kissed his Cowboy thoroughly, held onto him for longer than he should have, and said, "I'll talk to you Wednesday or Thursday. You drive safe, now. I love you, Cowboy."
When Ennis got into the cab and started the engine, he looked back at these folks who have come to mean so much to him. Jack had gone back to the porch and was standing behind his mother, with his arms around her in a protective stance. Ennis waved once, and drove down the gravel road towards Riverton.
Claire and Jack waved, then stood there on the porch, quietly watching till they could no longer see the aqua and white of the truck through the trees.
"I miss him already." said Jack.
"I do too, Jackie, I surely do." said Claire.
Then she added, "Let's get that dinner table cleared off, young man. We need to go see your daddy this afternoon."