A Better Idea
Chapter 31
Saturday, July 2, 1983
Two days later the holiday weekend finally arrived. Family members were milling around on the lawn or sitting in deck chairs on the porch or in the house over at Iris' and Walter's. Talking, drinking cold drinks, munching on carrot sticks or any one of an amazing array of foods laid out for a quick bite. The women tucked the desserts in the laundry room, away from their husbands' eager eyes and sweet tooth.
John and Claire went on over to the picnic early to visit, while Jack and Ennis finished up several chores. Gran talked Bobby and Jenny into going along with the old folks, giving her boys a bit of private time.
Being alone in this house was such an unexpected luxury, they hurried through their chores to have some lovin' time. Afterwards, Jack showered and dressed. He came back upstairs to find Ennis still lying butt naked in all his glory. Leaning down to kiss Ennis' sweaty neck, Jack had to practically drag him out of bed, since he was all warm, satisfied, and completely drowsy. "Let's go, Cowboy. Time to party. Aren't you hungry? Want an ice cold beer, don'tcha?"
Lying limply on the bed, face in the pillow, Ennis stated his preference. "D'ruther stay here, Jack. Don't need no 4th of July picnic. Just need you."
"Aw ain't that Sweeeet, lover." Jack crooned, just before cracking his damp towel across Ennis' bare butt with a wicked snap. "C'mon, get your shower, Cowboy. Hurry up, or I'll leave you here, high and dry. Won't be no supper cooked here tonight, ya know."
Ennis saw that he wasn't winning this tussle, so he gave in and stood up to gather a clean shirt, pants and underwear to take down to the bathroom with him. "Oh all right. Damn. You're always wanting to go somewhere, do somethin', can't you just be happy to lay around and rest once in awhile? Don't you get tired a going, Twist?"
"Nope." replied Jack. He studiously kept his back turned to Ennis, made himself busy straightening the bed, 'cause he dare not look at that long limbed, lean and muscular, naked body of his man, or they'd be right back in that bed, never to leave it the rest of the day!
While Ennis and Jack were still getting ready, Harold and Margaret arrived at the picnic, to a big welcome. They had been away longer than usual this time, and everyone was glad to see them. They both mingled awhile, nibbled on snacks, and spoke to their nephews, their spouses and kids. They really enjoyed this younger generation. It was their one regret, that they hadn't had children together, but they made sure to appreciate the kids they had from their first marriages, and visited often.
Finally, the older generation congregated happily together. The women sat on the porch, catching up on each other's news. The men found the keg and got a cup of iced cold beer. They stood around talking about stock prices, weather and the economy. Then they did a little catching up on each other's news, as well.
Walter brought Harold up to date about one of their friends, Ralph Weismantel, who had died recently of an aneurysm. "I remember him from the day they moved here; he was in my class from the middle of 2nd grade, on through. He was such a cut up, but the teacher's always seemed to like him. All except Mrs. Ellerie in 5th grade, she didn't like nobody." They discussed the shortness of life on this earth, ending with "you never know how long you got here, you just never know."
Harold agreed, saying "Yeah! Like me; thought I was a goner with that pneumonia back in '63; but I guess it jes' wadn't my time. Been twenty years of a whole new life with my wife, Margaret, and my health bein' so good." John couldn't help but think of another couple who met and fell in love in 1963, who hadn't had as easy a time of it. This had never occurred to him before. 'Damn! They sure've put up with a lot to be together, ain't they?'
Then Harold mentioned that his wife's sister and her husband wanted to come out next month, visit them a bit, and go to Devil's Tower. Thought they "might go with, hadn't been in years", he said.
"Hey Johnny, r'member the last time we went over there?" asked Walter. "Devil's Tower is practically right on our doorstep, and we ain't been back, in all these years."
"Yeah, I r'member it though, it was a fun day. Rained like a sonofabitch! We all got soaked and had to stop in ta that beer joint in Oshoto to dry off. What year was that, Walter?"
"Well, had to be '46 'cause Kenneth was just walking and Iris was pregnant with Roger, right? And Little Go was just about 3." reminisced Walter.
John dropped his full cup of beer on the lawn. Retrieving the empty cup, he collapsed on the nearest lawn chair, feeling like he couldn't breathe. "I haven't heard that name in so long, Walter. It liked ta knock a hole in me. Little Go is dead and gone, never to return, I sure do miss that little guy."
"Bullshit, Johnny Twist, that's Fuckin Bullshit!" steamed Walter, craning his neck around to make sure none of his grandchildren were within earshot. He angrily jabbed his finger at John, "If Little Go is dead, it's 'cause you killed him. You might be my best friend, goddammit, but I refuse to stand here with my tongue in my mouth and let you talk like that! Ain't no reason to miss that boy; he turned into a fine man, and he came here to help you! You need to unbend your stiff-assed self and admit you've done wrong. No more self pity, John! You're gonna have to start making an effort to make this right, be a man about it, no one else can do it for you!"
Walter was so angry, he threw his half-full beer cup into the nearest trash can and stalked off, needing to be alone, needing to calm down. Walter was not a crying man, normally, but he had tears in his eyes. Tears for Jack, who had been named Little Go, 'cause that's what he always said. "Go Daddy, Go!" and Johnny'd pick him up and take him with him, no matter where he was going. 'Took that boy everywhere; was the light of his life. It's a goddamned shame the way things has gone, ever since Childress, Texas.' he thought.
John was badly shaken; and Harold totally stunned. He'd never seen his mild-mannered brother go off like that on anyone, let alone his best friend in the entire world. But, of course, Harold knew the whole story too. He had seen the deterioration of Johnny's n' Sis' home life, more like devastation, you ask him. "Walter's right, you know, John."
John Twist put his face in his hands, and sobbed. "I know, I know, it's all my fault, but I don't know what to do about it. It's eating me alive. You know what kinda father I had, Harold! I think about talking to m'boy, and I just freeze up. How could a son ever forgive a father for the things I said to him, the things I've done? How could a father even ask him to, when I ain't even forgiven my own father?"
"Don't know, John. But I ain't the one you need to ask that question. You'll never get rid a this, you don't bring it out in the open. Lance that boil! I promise ya, Johnny, you'll feel better, f'you do."
"I . . . I suppose." stammered John.
"Looks like you're gonna get yer chance, if yer aimin' to take it."
John turned his head, saw Jack and Ennis pulling up in the yard, parking alongside all the other vehicles. Taking a deep, shuddery breath, he stood.
Feeling so weak, but determined to see this through, he was already getting stronger. He walked straight over to the driver's side as Jack got out of the truck.
"Can I talk to you, Jack?" he asked.
"Sure, lemme go get a beer . ."
"No, son, I mean now! Will you take me back over to the house? Tell Ennis to go on in and find Claire, she'll introduce him around."
Jack saw the red-rimmed eyes of his father; first time in his life he'd seen such a sight. He did not know what was going on, but he was sure something mighty big was happening. He licked his lower lip and nodded his head. "awright." he said.
At Ennis' questioning eyes, Jack shrugged slightly, said "My dad wants to talk to me alone, go on in and find Mama or Jenny, you know most everyone already. Okay, Cowboy?"
"You sure 'bout this, bud?"
"Yeah, he wants to talk. First time as long as I can r'member. Guess we'll talk."
Ennis leaned into Jack to offer support, put his hand on his shoulder like a well wishing friend, said "I love you, Jack."
"I love you too, Cowboy. It'll be alright; we'll be back soon. He wants to go to the house."
And they left. Jack drove with his heart in his throat, wondering what the hell was up now.
Ennis walked into the crowd, nodding to those he knew. He drew a beer from the keg, and found Jenny over by a tub full of soft drinks, her arm halfway down into the icy water. She pulled out an A & W as her dad approached. "Hey daddy, I see you finally got here."
"Sure did, how're you, Angel?" Ennis did that thing that he does. The girls always loved it; came to expect it. He curled his fingers and rubbed them down the side of his daughter's face.
Smiling impishly, Jenny said, "Oh, I'm fine, daddy."
"You over here driving all the boys wild?" No way he'd ever talked to her before, but with Jack's encouragement, no instruction manual needed.
Surprised, she looked at her daddy's face, his little smile. "No, dad. Just two or three of them."
Raising one eyebrow, he asked, "Oh? And who might that be?"
"Well, Bobby, of course, and Brad. Maybe even Kyle."
Ennis was floundering now, without Jack here to bail him out, so he just nodded and said "hmmm." Happily then, Ennis thought of a question all on his own, "So, are any of them three special to ya, darlin'?"
"Well, yeah. Guess you could say that." She grinned wickedly,
Her daddy grinned back at her, and waited.
"Dad, Brad is so smart, and so funny. Cute as a bug, too. He can make up a pun faster than anyone I've ever met. He's a real good athlete; he's even going to be the quarterback on his football team this year. He'll be a senior."
"But. . ." her dad said for her.
"Well, I like him so much, but I don't "Like – Like" him."
'Oh gawd', Ennis thought. "I'll have to r'mind maself ta ask Jack what "Like – Like" means."
"And Kyle is wonderful. He has a knack for making everyone feel good, and welcome to the group. He plans to be a Counselor, or a Coach in middle school. He's very bashful in some ways, but confident in others."
"But. . ." her dad said for her.
"Again, I like him so much, but I don't "Like – Like" him either."
"And Bobby?" Ennis prompted?
Jenny's whole face changed. She blushed bright pink and looked down at the ground. "And then there's Bobby", she said. "Bobby can be so stubborn. And he's gross; he opens his mouth and shows me his food when he's eating just to tease me; and then he laughs about it. He's easily bored at times."
"And?"
"And I'm just crazy about him, daddy!"
'Oof! Kick in the stomach, dad, your little girl just said she's crazy about a boy.' Ennis thinks to himself.
"Does he know how you feel?"
"OH NO, daddy, I would never tell him that. Promise you won't tell him!"
"Of course, I won't tell him darlin'. This is your business, not mine. But I must say, I'm very curious why you react this way, like you're scared to tell him how you feel?"
"Well, daddy, if you must know, I'm way too young to be getting serious with anyone. I have school starting in a few weeks. I'm moving back to Riverton. I have goals, things that I want to do, and plan to do before I settle down, before I get serious about a boy. Even someone as exciting and gorgeous as Bobby."
"Well, I'm sure you know best, li'l darlin'." Ennis said, greatly relieved.
"Besides daddy, I don't really know if it's Bobby I care for. . . ."
All right, Ennis was losing it for sure now. Didn't she just say . . . ?
"Or if it's just that I love Jack so much, and he's the spittin' image a Jack.
If I'm transferring feelings, THAT would not be fair to Bobby."
"You . . . Love . . . Jack . . .so . . .much? What are you saying Jenny? You love Jack?"
"Oh daddy, of course, I love Jack, what's not to love? He listens to me when I talk to him, and he doesn't think I'm a child. He's always ready for fun, and he's kind to everyone. He wouldn't hurt a fly. Not to mention that he's just Yummy!"
Ennis thought seriously, that he might pass out. "Jack is yummy?"
"DADDY, of course, Jack is yummy. Have you LOOKED at the man?"
Okay, Ennis couldn't hold it any longer. He busted out laughing, tears streamed down his face. And then he couldn't catch his breath. Gasping, he said "Darlin', I been lookin' at that yummy man for 20 years!"
"SEE daddy? And, You know what the best part a Jack is?"
'Oh gawd, where was she taking him now? What new territory were they going to explore next?' Ennis thought fearfully. "Uh, what would that be, Jenny?"
"It's that he loves you so, so much, and he makes you happier than you've ever, ever been!" she said, her face just beaming.
Trying to breathe, and almost succeeding, Ennis said. "You got that right, little girl. You got that just right!"
"So'm I gonna have to fight you, and every other woman here for him?"
"No, silly. 'Sides, many of the women here, are checking YOU out 'stead o Jack."
"Oh, you musta misunderstood that one, little girl."
"No, I've heard the comments as you walk by, no mistake here. One even came up to me and questioned me about you since I got here today."
"What do you mean? Questioned you how?"
"Well, she came up and asked, "Is your dad single?" and I answered her "No, he's spoken for." "Oh?" she says. "I thought sure he was on his own, every time I see him he's visiting up here in Lightning Flat, just hanging out with Jack." "Exactly!" I say, and smile into her eyes, and I just keep smiling into her eyes, until she gets it.
"Is this a problem for you, Jenny?"
"How do you mean?"
"I mean, my bein' with Jack, or you havin' to explain that I'm with Jack? Does it make you feel bad in some way?"
"Daddy, I have never been so happy over you, and how you're doing. You have no idea how me and Junior was always so worried because you was so sad and alone. You and Jack make me feel like true love is possible for all of us. You found it, we maybe can too." Jenny hugged her daddy and hung on, keeping her face pressed into his chest so he wouldn't see the happy tears that had gathered in her eyes.
"Ahem . .. " coughed Brad. "Mr. Del Mar?"
"Ennis."
"Oh, okay. Uh, Ennis? Aunt Claire wants to know if you're ready to crank ice cream. She's out in the back yard at the picnic table."
"Uh, sure, Brad. Tell 'er I'll be right there." Agreed Ennis, having no clue what cranking ice cream meant.
Ennis put his arm around Jenny's shoulders and walked with her toward the back yard, "Jen, speaking of your sister, did I hear you on the phone with Junior this morning? I surely do miss that girl."
"Yeah, daddy, that was Junior one a the times the phone rang this morning."
"How's she doin', did she say?"
"Yeah, she's okay."
"Well, what'd she say? Why are you holdin' back like that?"
"Well, daddy, if you must know, it's supposed to be a surprise."
"What is?"
"That she and Kurt are comin' up here tomorra."
"Alla this way? What for?"
"Well, seems she misses us, too. 'Sides, it won't be all this way. Kurt has family in Gillette, so they'll go there first, and then come on up here. They're stayin' overnight, and will go back Monday."
"Well, I don't know if I like her and that .."
"Daddy! It's all arranged. Uncle Walter worked it out, Junior's bunkin' in with Kelly, and Kurt is stayin' in Kyle's room. They won't even be in the same house. You okay with it, now?"
"Yeah, 'cept I bet her mama wishes she'd stay . ."
"She's spendin' today with Mama 'n Monroe 'n 'em. Goin' to the fireworks with'em there in Riverton tonight. Kurt's goin' with'em too."
"Huh. Guess she's got it all figured out, ain't she? She's a real thinker there!"
Most of the family were already known to Ennis and Jenny, thanks to the big porch project they'd all worked on together. The only new faces were Uncle Harold and Aunt Margaret, back from Las Vegas.
As soon as Claire saw Ennis coming around the side of the house with Jenny she waved at them and introduced him and his daughter to Harold and Margaret. Jenny took off to re-join the younger crowd at this point.
As they were introduced Ennis said to Harold, "I see the pneumonia didn't get you that summer."
At that, Harold raised his right eyebrow, just like Jack does.
"Yeah, Jack and me, we was herdin' sheep up on Brokeback that summer. Our boss came up to tell us you was in the hospital. He reported that you were "not expected to make it." Guess you fool'd em all. Congratulations."
Harold smiled, said "Oh, you're Jack's friend, Ennis Del Mar. I'm not so good with names like I useta be. Heard a lot about you, young man." He turned to his wife and put his arm around her. "This here woman, she's the reason for my recovery, Ennis. Found something to live for, someone to live for. She was my nurse, you know."
"Yes sir, I know jes' what you mean." As he looked down at the ground and smiled, Ennis couldn't help wondering how Jack was making out with his father, and wondered what the old man wanted to talk about.
Ennis learned quickly how to crank ice cream, and put his energy into it for Mom. Even with one good arm, he was keeping a steady rhythm, holding the containing in place with his cast, and turning cream, sugar, eggs and vanilla into a cold, smooth dessert with his right hand. Mom watched his progress and added ice and salt at the proper times. She asked him why Jack wasn't with him, helping to crank, since she knew her son dearly loved ice cream. He explained about the two men, father and son, going off to talk, back at the house.
So, there they were on the Bell's back lawn, Claire and Ennis, thinking on the men they loved, and worrying; both pretending they weren't. Cranking, and salting, talking sporadically about anything and everything but what was so heavy on their minds.
Just as the ice cream was coming to perfection, Claire looked at the man who was before her. Churning for all he was worth, doing it for her; and it moved her once again that he was her son, not born to her, but her son nonetheless. "Ah, thank you, love." She kissed his jaw below his ear, solidly, not a glancing, pretend kiss, but a real kiss that was meant. "That's perfect now. Will you just drape this folded towel over the top, and set it in the shade over there in the corner? I'll scoop it out soon as I get the Tupperware container I need."
"Ennis, sit right over here in this rocker if you're hungry. Let me get you a plate, alright?" asked Mom.
"No, ain't hungry jes' yet, thanks anyway, Mom." said Ennis, "Goin' to see if I can find Roger n' Patsy, maybe talk to Mauro if he's here. You seen'em?"
Moving around beside her, Ennis put his arm around her shoulder, put his face to hers, cheek to cheek and spoke softly into her ear, "Wanna wait for Jack, 'fore I eat, ya know?" She nodded her understanding at him, and he walked off to find his friends.
Ennis found Roger, Kenneth and Mauro arguing over how much barbeque sauce was "just right" to slather on the grilling chicken splits. He chatted with them awhile, Mauro was especially glad to see Ennis getting around so well. Ennis was saying how he'd like to get inside that cockpit again, learn more about the instruments, more about flying. He was truly fascinated by the idea of flying an airplane. Mauro told him, "happy to show you, anytime, anywhere. You just let me know when you're ready."
Mauro asked when Ennis needed to go back to Riverton for checkups and removal of cast and wires. "You just let me know, I'll be glad to take you, E, anytime. I'm countin' on it. You promise to call me?"
Ennis walked away to find Patsy, feeling uneasy. 'Why did Mauro act so eager to help him? Left a little flutter in his stomach, weird is what it was.'
Ennis found Patsy and sat with her, asking how things were going with her. He took her hand and interlaced his own fingers with hers, it just felt right. He didn't bring up her brother, Charles, but was there for her in case she wanted to talk about him. In time, she did; but quickly went on to happier topics of the kids, and Roger.
Later, Ennis saw Walter over by the keg, he poured himself a cup of cold beer, and talked to him about the good weather for his picnic, and the very good turn-out he had today. They mentioned all the friends who were at the Cattlemen's picnic today, they'd see them for Labor Day, for sure.
No matter who Ennis was talking to, whether Jenny or Mom; even Patsy, Walter or the men his own age, Ennis couldn't stop worrying and wondering about what was going on with Jack and his dad. At last, he couldn't stand it anymore. He asked Walter if he could borrow his truck to go over there and see that everything was alright.
Walter had not missed John, didn't know he'd gone off to talk with Jack. But he did fill Ennis in on how he'd blown up at John earlier, and his reason for doing so. He felt bad about it, but felt it was inevitable. Harold told them both of John's reaction after Walter stormed off, and what he'd said right before Jack and Ennis had pulled in to park in the yard. All three of them were feeling uneasy now. Ennis said, "So, kin I borry yer truck, Walter? I really need to see that Jack is alright."
The three of them piled into Walter's truck and headed for the Twist's house. When they got there, no one was to be found. They checked the house, the barn, the immediate pasture, but saw not hide nor hair of John nor Jack. The pick up was there, still, so they couldn't be that far, could they?
Walter, Harold and Ennis drove on through the pasture looking left and right. Not until they got over by the tree line did they see some movement.
It was Jack swinging his fist and connecting with his dad's cheek, knocking him to the ground. He bent as if to pick him up and do it again, when they both looked up at the sound of the approaching pickup truck with three men inside.
John stood up under his own steam, and Jack stood beside him waiting to see what was up with Walter. . . they knew it was Walter's truck. Both men were breathing heavily, but didn't really seem the worse for wear.
"What in hell you doin' here?" John asked the three men.
"Yeah, we don't need you here" agreed Jack.
Ennis called "Jack, you sure you're okay?"
"Dammit, Ennis! I said I was okay, now we're working something out here, can you all just get the hell back over to the picnic?"
"That what you want, too, John?" asked Harold.
"Yes, ah done told you so. This don't concern you. Me'n ma boy workin' sumpin' out here, jes' leave us. We'll be over direckly."
So the Good Samaritans drove on back to the picnic, heads hanging low, feeling like intruders 'stead o helpers. When they got back, they decided that what they really needed was another beer. 'T'hell with them two ingrates, we was only tryin' a help. Shit!' they thought.
Eventually, Jack and his dad had to rest. They walked back toward the house, came in and got a cold glass of iced tea. Just sitting there, being with one another, felt strange, felt new.
John had begun to talk as soon as they drove back to the house. Told Jack how he knew he'd been a real s.o.b. of a father, and didn't deserve a good son like him. Said he'd never understood why the things he wanted to say and have with a son of his, never seemed to work out, or come out the way he planned.
They walked briskly, in no particular direction; couldn't stroll to words as sharp and hard as these. They talked of specific events that Jack remembered with special hurt and anger. John told him sorry, told him what he'd wanted to say or do in that situation, but something contrary inside his head caused him to take a nasty slant on everything. Had to be mean and spiteful instead of offering love or guidance.
John shared stories of his own childhood. The beatings, the meanness from his father, were never explained, and never changed. Then the old man died, robbing John of a man's confrontation. By the time John grew old enough to want to settle things with his father, the bastard'd been dead. Could never get satisfaction. It was left for all time, no way to do anything about it.
"But that ain't no excuse for the way I acted Jack, I had the love of a good man. Your mama's daddy, Will Bell, was the father I'd always wished for, and got. You never got to know him, was still too young when he died. But he was a real good man. If he'd lived you'd never have had to go through half of the shit I put on you. He would have set me straight, Childress, Texas, or no Childress, Texas."
John told of leaving that hospital, with Walter, so busted up, and wishing that they'd killed him 'stead o jes' ruinin' him. Daddy Bell had come to see him, but John wouldn't allow it. He drove John's truck back home; all he could do for him. The entire trip from Childress, Texas all the way to Lightning Flat, Wyoming, not one word passed between best friends, Walter Bell and Johnny Twist. Nothing he knew before, but he was beginning to learn real good, how to shut people out.
"Nobody felt near as sorry for me as I felt for myself; that self pity turned me mean. I saw it happening, and still I couldn't change it. I saw what it was doin' ta you, and ta yer ma, and I let it happen."
John insisted that Jack should hit him, or kick him even, for all the bad things, all the meanness of his growing up years. Jack had said no, it was too little, too late. But John persisted. "Slug me one!" he raged, "I deserve it!" So Jack took a swing and punched John in the stomach, doubling him over and then smashed him in the face with a right upper cut. Once he got started, he couldn't stop, he pummeled his dad, crying "you bastard, you said I was weak, there was never nothing I could do to please you!" punching his dad in the shoulder.
"You never once came to see me ride!" right hook to the cheek. This was what the others saw when they drove up. Jack would have continued, but when he saw Ennis he knew that he had love in his life aplenty, and didn't want to continue to hit his old man, wanted to start to heal now. He was past it, past the anger and hurt. Wanted to go forward, and not look backward any longer.
So, the iced tea was refreshing them in body, and the airing of the awful truth was refreshing them in soul, releasing them from the icy grip, allowing them to go forward after all these years.
"Better get somethin' on those cuts on yer face, old man. We'll clean'em out so they don't get infected." Jack got up and went to the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. Smiled when he saw the iodine sitting right next to the Kaopectate, 'that oughta fix him right up.'
Jack was cleaning the cuts and bruises on his dad's face, applying iodine to the scrapes and cuts both, when John spoke. "Know the finest thing I seen in the longest time?"
"Eh?" said Jack.
"You, with that boy of yours, son. You are the father I never was, the father I always wanted to be. Jack, I don't know how you did it, but you didn't continue in the same way you was treated. Maybe you got more of your mama's side of the family in you, you got what her daddy had in him, the goodness, the patience, the teaching."
"Yeah, and maybe I just knew how it felt to be raised like I was; didn't want to raise a boy, or even a dog, like I was treated."
"Fair 'nough, Jack. Can you ever forgive me for the past, son?"
"No, I can't."
"Well, that's alright. I don't blame you."
"But, I can put it aside, see how you go from here on out. How you treat me, and those I love; mama, Bobby, Ennis, his girls. You know? I've seen a bit of change in you these past weeks since Ennis came up here. You're already workin' on a better future, I can see that. The past will have to remain in the past."
John put his forehead down on the table, tears of gratitude, and happiness leaking from his eyelids. "You won't be sorry, son. I promise."
"Don't need no promises; just action. The right kind of action. Ya know?"
"Yes, Jack. I know."
Jack walked into the bathroom and put the iodine back in the medicine cabinet. Returning to the dining table, he said, "What say we get on back to the picnic 'n get ourselves somethin' stronger'n this iced tea? I'm hungry 'nuff, I believe I could eat a camel."
In fact, they did return to the picnic. Claire, Ennis, Walter and Harold, waited for them and pretended all the while that they weren't doing so. Such relief they felt when Jack's pick-up pulled up and parked next to Walter's truck.
Ennis reached out and ran his curled fingers down Jack's face, and Claire touched John's cut face gingerly. They each said to the one they love, "You all right?" and got a nod for an answer. They filled their plates, ate a hearty meal, drank their beers and acted as if this had not been a monumental day for them all.
Note: An Interlude
A small glimpse into the future.
Six months from this day, on January 2, 1984, they built a bonfire together, to burn the belt that John's daddy had beat him with on a regular basis. They burned the clothes that John had worn into that motel room all those years ago, and they burned a hickory switch, to represent the ones John had used on Jack. They burned a calendar to represent all the time that was wasted on anger and self pity.
Since there was nothing to burn to replicate John's fists and his ugly words; Bobby had an idea. They should write down on little slips of paper, the hateful words, along with the actions, the worst of times Jack remembered that John had glared at him with such venom, and all the pain Jack had suffered over the years, as well as those John had suffered at the hands of his daddy. They wrote out the little slips of paper and put them into a round Quaker Oats box, recently emptied.
When the flames were reaching the house top, they stood around waiting for it to settle to a steady roar, then one by one John and Jack threw the offending and hurtful objects into the fire, and let it consume them, let it burn away the aches that were decades old. Let it continue the healing that John had fostered these past 6 months and more.
No words were deemed necessary for this ceremony, but any were accepted as right, whether spoken aloud, or said privately within their hearts.
tbc