A Better Idea
Chapter Thirty-Two
July 3, 1983
Ennis and Jack were outside at dawn, before the summer sun began to punish all who toiled under its glare. Bobby was already on the porch when they stepped out the front door. He was sitting on a bench, eating a leftover biscuit filled with strawberry preserves, and drinking a glass of milk.
Just as Ennis had envisioned, they'd come to appreciate this porch. Most days began and ended right here. First cup of coffee, first cigarette of the day was enjoyed, often as not, on this porch. Sunrises, Sunsets too. Now they stared out across the horizon, the air smelling clean and feeling crisp following the front that passed through last night.
No need for words on a morning like this. The three men enjoying it; each in his own way, with his own thoughts. The contentment they felt was reflected back to them from their companion's faces,
Ranching is an everyday reality. The animals need to be fed and cared for; they need clean stalls, fresh hay, water, a good brushing. The chores were a regular part of the day, and the earlier they got them done, the sooner they could go enjoy another day of this 4th of July holiday weekend.
Ennis Del Mar field stripped his cigarette and put the paper in his pocket.
"Well, . . ." he said, heading out to the barn. And they all went to work.
In two hours time, they were back looking for breakfast, but were sorely disappointed when they saw the hustle and bustle in that kitchen.
Jenny and Gran were canning tomatoes this morning. There was a canner full of boiling water surrounding 8 quart jars filled with chopped tomatoes in juice just bubbling away on the stove. Claire was carefully timing them. Jenny was rinsing and stemming the next batch of tomatoes, they would be blanched with scalding water, then the skins would slip off without effort.
The kitchen windows were all steamed up from the moisture escaping the canner and the other large pot coming to a boil to blanch those tomatoes.
The men saw no promising activity that would suggest anyone remembered them or their stomachs. After pacing around a bit, Jack cleared his throat, and his mama looked up distractedly. "Oh, Jack! You're back." she said. "Grab this hot pad, dear, and reach into the oven. I've made us all a nice breakfast casserole, and it's keeping warm in the oven.
As he pulled the delicious smelling casserole out of the oven, Jack called to Bobby to set the table for everyone. "Mama will you and Jenny sit down and eat with us? Where's daddy? He coming to the table too?" Ennis and Bobby got the table set for the six of them, and Jack poured drinks.
Last night before climbing into her bed, Claire had assembled bread, ham slivers, whipped eggs and milk into the largest sized Pyrex baking dish she owned and covered it with Saran Wrap to refrigerate overnight. An hour ago she popped it into the oven. When it was near to being done, she had sprinkled some cheddar cheese liberally across the top to brown. Also made ahead was a square pyrex baking dish filled with cored apples, sugar, butter, cinnamon and small amount of water and baked for that same hour.
As soon as Jack had cleared the oven of the breakfast foods, Claire adjusted the thermostat back up to 450 degrees to preheat for the two rhubarb pies she had assembled for today's picnic supper. They'd go right into the oven on the lowest rack when the timer rang.
While the family ate breakfast, everyone had plenty to talk about. Bobby said his mama had called to find out when his senior year would start, needed to set a date for him to come to Denver to see her for his last two weeks before school. Jenny said, "Yeah, I need to get back to mom 'n Monroe's house in Riverton before my classes start at RCC." Both of them were leaving about the same week, might as well travel together. Ennis looked at Jack and winked, giving him a sly smile for the dates were scoped out in pen and pencil on Ennis' calendar from the funeral home.
Jack said "Ennis and I been thinkin' we'd take a couple weeks off too. Take a wedding trip for ourselves. Hadn't decided for sure when or where but this sounds like a pretty good time to go, when you both go." Claire just beamed at them, and John looked at Jack, nodded his head, and said "sounds good."
For some silly reason, Jenny and Bobby were both blushing.
"Mama, looks like that'd leave you and daddy on yer own fer a couple weeks, think you could manage okay?" Now, it was Claire's turn to blush. She looked over at John, and he said, "Bet we could. Yessir, bet we could."
John was happy to have some alone time with his new wife, new to him after so many years. Lately there'd been some flirting going on. He might be outa practice, but he could tell that much! And this was the girl he'd grown up across the road from, thinkin' 'bout her before she even knew he existed.
Jenny was excited about Junior and Kurt coming up today. Junior would have a chance to introduce Kurt to Bobby and the cousins. They'd all be gathering at Walter and Iris' around two o'clock. Knew there'd be games and singing, and just plain old visiting and catching up with family.
"Poppa, can I take your checkers game over to the picnic?" asked Jenny. All faces turned wide-eyed to Jenny and JC as he answered, "Sure can, Jen."
Jenny looked up at the staring folks around the table, "what?"
John knew what had surprised them all. He looked down into his plate of eggs and ham, and smiled a grateful smile for this sweet girl at his right.
Claire jumped up and said "gotta check my oven" and with her back turned, wiped a single tear from her eye with the tail of her apron.
She popped the two pies into the oven and set the timer for another 15 minutes. She'd need to lower the oven temp down to 350 at that point. She took the last batch of dripping canning jars, from the water in the canner, and set them to cool.
"Bobby, honey, would you get the pitcher of cream from the icebox?" asked Gran. "I surely do like a little sweet cream on my baked apples." As the family ate the fruit, they finalized plans for the day, had a second or third cup of coffee and just relaxed together before clearing the table.
Each of them got busy to set the kitchen to rights. The jars of green beans needed to be taken down to the root cellar; Jack and Bobby carried them down and put them on shelves, moving the ten remaining jars from last year's crop to the front, newest ones in the back. It took three trips each. Gran moved the jars of tomatoes to the stovetop and set them on tea towels to continue cooling. JC and Jenny put away all the food; milk, cream, and they covered the leftovers to be refrigerated. Ennis stacked all the dishes with like items, and made some hot dish water. He began to wash up everything in sight.
A wonderful smell permeated the whole house and Claire was reminded by the buzzing of the timer, that her pies were ready to come out of the oven.
"Oh, I never can smell a good ol' rhubarb pie without thinking of my cousin, Truman. This was always his favorite dessert, and that boy could eat pie!"
"I remember one rainy summer day me and him got up in our great grandmother's attic, over in Buffalo. His mama and mine had the same grandma, ya see. We found a trunk fulla old clothes, and tried them on, giggling to beat the band. The best part was the hats. We found these old hats, and put them on, lookin' in the mirror at ourselves, we thought we was somethin' ! I remember mine had feathers and plumes; real fancy, it was.
Our mothers heard us giggling and sneaked up the stairs and took a snapshot of us in those hats, if I can find it one a these days, I'll show it to you."
"Will he be here today, Gran? Have a piece a that pie?" Bobby asked, thinking about having some pie with a scoop a vanilla ice cream on top.
"No, Bob. Truman, he lives in Virginia now. Not s'posed to play favorites, I know, but he surely is one a my favorite relatives. I do miss that boy. He's not one for keeping in touch though. Wadn't for Christmas cards, doubt he'd ever write. In last year's card, he did include a nice snap of his irises. He's got a green thumb, like none I ever seen."
Soon, the teamwork showed results. The dishes were washed, dried and put away, the kitchen was swept spic 'n span. It showed no signs of the canning efforts except those last jars still cooling. The two rhubarb pies sat waiting under clean tea towels.
Claire took this opportunity to wash up for the day ahead, and rest in her room. She laid out her clothes for later, for the picnic and then thought she'd read a chapter of her book. Without intending to, she dropped off to sleep. Never would've admitted it but she needed this nap.
JC dug around in the closet and found the checkers box. He challenged Bobby to a game, and was pleasantly surprised when the boy agreed. 'Know it'll take time; one day at a time, one person at a time, but this is one repair job worth doin'. I stand to lose my whole family, I don't do this right.' he thought.
Little did JC know that Bobby was just as eager for his grandpa to make good. Saw how he was tryin', knew what had gone on between his daddy and the old man. 'Sure would like to have a grandpa to love some day, we'll see how it goes from here on out.' thought Bob.
They got the board set up and were making their initial moves, planning their strategy when JC spoke up. "You gonna play ball next spring, Bobby?"
"You bet." said Bob. "Ennis was a pitcher, think he'll work out with me some if I ask him."
"I can't wait." JC affirmed. "Ya know anythin' about them Texas Rangers?"
Jenny thumbed through a magazine in the parlor, but soon stretched out on the davenport sound asleep; her mouth open a little. Bobby pulled a light summer afghan over her, letting his knuckles trail lightly down her face, as he did so. He tiptoed out of the room, turning at the open doorway to gaze back at this vision. Sighing, he returned to his game with the old man.
The men played checkers, winning one game each, and discussed their mutual love of baseball. It was nice. In stead of playing a rubber match, they each decided to rest before the afternoon's socializing. Bobby went out to the barn, gave each horse some carrot. He then stretched out across a couple bales of hay next to Grey's stall and closed his eyes.
John took a small blanket with him and went out on the porch, sat in a rocker and put his feet up on a wooden box. He threw the little blanket over his legs, and just day dreaming a bit, thought, 'what we need out here is a porch swing.' Before long he was sawing logs. Didn't wake till much later when he heard his family stirring around and packing up for the picnic.
When they first got upstairs, Ennis and Jack quickly got naked, already enjoying the freedom to be together, just like they always wanted, in the privacy of their own room. "I want you bad!" one said. "Me too!" came the reply, but they both knew the family was right downstairs, and there was nothin' wrong with their hearin'.
"Ain't gonna fuck you in broad daylight, Twist, you cain't keep quiet nohow."
"Me? Who was it my daddy heard hollerin'?"
"Whose fault was that?"
"Guess it was mine!" agreed Jack with a sparklin' smile, showing dimples and all. "Aw, what're we gonna do now, Ennis?"
"Doubt there's nothin' we can do."
"You might be thinkin' we're doin' without till we get moved into our new place. Well, I Won't"
"Oh yeah?" smiled Ennis. He pulled Jack to him roughly, running his hands up and down his back and butt, clasping him against his erection and kissing his mouth like a man parched.
As they began to rub against one another, Jack groaned aloud, and Ennis walked away from him. "You can't be makin' no noise. I told ya that."
Chastised, Jack looked guilty.
"Shit!" said Ennis. "You're my man. I want you moanin' and groanin' when I touch you. Yellin' if ya want to! We gotta do something about our livin' arrangements soon, Jack. Real soon. C'mere, baby."
It added a new element to their lovemaking. See how frantic we can drive the other without making a peep. No noise, but plenty of writhing and wanting and begging. They soon found out that the bed was their enemy, squeaking, it gave away every move they made, so they tried to think of any way they could be quiet about having what they both wanted. They thought of goin' at it standin' up against the walls or laying on the bare floor. They woulda hung from the chandeliers if they'da had any.
Ennis slowly and seductively suckled Jack's neck, his favorite spot, and ran his hands over his chest and back, while devising a plan to satisfy his man. Taking Jack's hand, he pulled him over between the windows at the farthest distance from the living quarters downstairs. He sat with his back against the outside wall, his knees upraised, to cradle Jack. Hungrily kissing his mouth, delving deeply, tongues dancing, he ran his hand, slick with lube, over both himself and Jack preparing and protecting his lover's body. Slowly he stretched him, fondled him until he was ready, and then he helped him lower himself onto his straining and dripping dick.
Immediately Ennis was on a different plane, all restrictions forgotten. His eyes went unfocused, turned darker by desire, he began murmuring "fuck, you're so beautiful, oh, god Jack, you drive me fuckin' wild, baby." Jack didn't want to stem the tide of these sweet words ever, nor these feelings, but he leaned into Ennis, and covered his mouth with kisses, quieting him.
Ennis lifted his hips into Jack, they began slowly to rock each other in union, to find a rhythm that made all the world fall away and nothing existed but the two of them. The effort of keeping silent took some concentration, but it added a glimmer of illicit enjoyment, almost driving them over the edge too soon. They had to stop twice, think of other things, let their urges pass.
Again they began fucking each other, face to beloved face, unable to hold back any longer, they worked into the faster pace that brought them such joy in each other. When they came, they whispered their words of blessed release into their lover's mouth.
Spent. Sated. Sticky. Happy.
Ennis thought he'd never be able to get up from this floor, Jack thought he'd never get his legs to work again. Finally, they were able to stand up and make it over to the bed. Lying there, letting their breathing return to normal, they each held onto the other. Ennis had his good hand on Jack's face, fingers cupping his ear and feeling Jack's tousled hair. Jack held onto Ennis' upper arms. Their eyes closed against the sun now peaking in their windows.
Several sweet minutes later, one of them broke the silence.
"What do you think about to settle down?"
Blinking into consciousness, his word came out drowsy. "huh?"
"When we're getting too close to coming too fast, what do you think about to stop it, and settle down?"
"Not sure you wanta hear that."
"Sure I do, what is it?"
"Brussel Sprouts; ya know, how they smell, and taste."
"Ewww, that does sound awful."
"Why, what d'you think 'bout?"
"Um, aguirre sittin on the can."
"Unh, that's just wrong - how gross!"
"Tol' ya!"
Visualizing this, they both got the giggles, feeling 19 again, 'stead of 39.
Finding a way to wrap up in each other's arms even better, they snuggled down for a short nap. They set the alarm cause they didn't want to sleep too long, and wake up groggy. Didn't want to burn daylight either.
Showered, refreshed, and dressed, Ennis and Jack helped pack up the truck with Claire's rhubarb pies and the popcorn balls Jenny'd made for Junior. She knew that was a special treat for her sister, and they were easy enough to make.
They drove two vehicles over to the picnic, laden down with food, games, sweaters (Gran's insistance) and extra lawn chairs. No sooner had they parked in the yard, than a guided missile with long auburn hair propelled herself at Ennis and threw both arms around his neck.
"Daddy!" she screeched. He clutched her tight, locking his hands together behind her back. He started his body spinning, swinging her off her feet, and "flying her like an airplane" just like he had done when she was five.
Jack gaped open-mouthed at playful Ennis; he loved seeing this side of his man but he was also afraid he'd get dizzy and drop Junior, or trip over his own feet, with the same results. Carrying one of the pies, Jack walked over to them for his hug, almost as glad to see Junior as Ennis was.
Junior introduced Kurt to Jack. Jack said "didn't know our girl could fly." And smiling, Kurt said "Neither did I!" Ennis was catching his breath, looking at Jack kind of sheepish-like, he put his good arm around Junior and walked her over to a spot under a tree, pulled her down to sit in the grass. "Missed you, angel. Tell me everything, what's been going on with you?"
Jack walked over to Ennis with a funny look on his face. "You two just gonna sit out here all by yourselves? You could come up on the porch, there." Ennis looked up, said "naw, we're just gonna catch up, Jack."
Jack stalked off, "well, I was just thinkin' out loud!"
Jenny couldn't hear the words, but she could sure read the body language, and she knew this wasn't going well. She strolled out to the tree where Junior and daddy were sitting, and gave Junior a big hug. "Dad, you need to let Junior come on in. She has to introduce Kurt to Gran and Poppa and Bobby; even if all the others did get to meet him before we got here."
"She can do that later after we get re-acquainted."
"Daddy, you're part of a family now, it ain't just you no more. Hate to say it, but you're being rude!"
"No such thing, little girl. Just talkin' to my daughter here. Missed her."
"Did you ever think that me and Jack missed her too, and Gran and Bobby? They'll want to hear how she's doing, same as you. Gonna make her tell it all three times?"
"Well . . .uh"
"Daddy, think you hurt Jack's feelings, real bad."
"I kinda got that feelin' in my stomach, just lookin' at him, but I don't know what I did or said to make him feel bad."
"You didn't even walk in with him, just jumped out of the truck and went off and grabbed Junior. It sounds like a little thing, but it ain't. You did it in front of his whole family."
Ennis pinched the bridge of his nose, thinking how he'd feel if Jack had done him that way. "Christ, I wouldn't hurt that man for the world, and here I turn around and do that to him!"
"Come on little girl, I gotta learn to share you; let's go say hello to the family. Guess I got some crow to eat." Ennis took Junior's hand and walked with her toward the folks on the porch, didn't see Jack though.
He laced Jenny's fingers with his own below his cast, and whispered in her ear. "Thank you for tellin' me darlin', what am I goin' a do when you're not livin' here no more?"
"Dunno, guess you'll have to figure out this "relationship" stuff on your own!"
They all laughed at that.
Ennis caught sight of Jack at the keg with Kurt, JC and Uncle Walter. "Guess I'll go over and see if I can mend some fence with Jack, you girls want to come with, or go on up to the porch and see Gran?"
"Think I want a get Kurt and take him over to meet Gran now, so I'll walk along with you." When she got to the little group around the keg, Junior walked over and put her arms around Jack's waist and hugged him without saying a word, he leaned down and kissed the top of her head. She then went to Kurt, and pulled on his hand. "I 'sume you met Poppa 'n Uncle Walter, so let's go meet Gran, Kurt."
"Uh, okay. See you later guys." Kurt looked tickled that his girl had come to claim him, and happily followed behind Junior.
Jack was studiously not looking at Ennis. He went right over and stood in front of him, got no eye contact, so he pulled a beer for himself, then approached Jack again. "Jack . . ."
Silence.
"Jack, are ya gonna talk to me or not?"
Silence.
"I'm sorry Jack, I'm just a dumbass. I didn't mean nothin' by it. You know I didn't."
"What was that? I couldn't hear you, Ennis."
"I said, I'm sorry, bud! I'm just a dumbass, and . . . .I love you, Jack!"
Walter and John were just standing there, amused at the tangle Ennis had got himself into. They had turned their backs to give the boys some privacy, but they were smirking so hard their mouths hurt. When the "I love you" came out of Ennis' mouth, both men walked off to go check in with their wives. They hated having to make up for transgressions, especially when they didn't really know what those transgressions had been, so they didn't want to witness any more of Ennis' misery.
Jack grabbed Ennis by the back of his neck, and pulled his face up close, forehead to forehead. "Okay, Cowboy. I know you didn't. It just hit me funny. Guess I was a bit jealous, and I know better than to be that way.
I'm sorry, too."
"Y'are?"
"Sure am. Ya got every right to be excited to see your daughter, I'm glad to see her too. Let's go find them kids and catch up on all their news."
When mealtime came, folks re-arranged themselves, regrouped and found new people to talk to. Ennis and Jack found themselves at a table with Margaret, Harold, Patsy, Roger, Junior and Kurt.
Jenny and Bobby were with Kelly, Brad, Laura, Kenneth, Rachel, Gran and Poppa. The groups kept forming and re-forming, so everyone had a chance to visit with the folks they cared to talk to.
The topic got around to trips and traveling, and Jack said they'd planned a trip for when Ennis got his cast and wires off. Would coincide with Bobby's end of the summer visit with his mother, and Jenny going back to get ready for college. "Ain't quite decided where we want to go, though." he said.
Margaret said, "Can't go wrong, with Vegas." and Roger reported "We sure enjoyed our trip to Branson, Missouri. I highly recommend it." Harold said "there's always the grand canyon." Kurt told that the Rodeo and Stock Show was going to be in Cheyenne 'bout that time, thought that'd be a nice trip.
"Well, some other time it would, Kurt, but it don't sound too Honeymoon-y" said Ennis. Jack just about spit baked beans across the table. Wiping his mouth, and then his eyes, he said, "Darlin', wish you'd warn me 'fore you come out with one a yer declarations."
"What you talking about Jack? Only declaration I know is the Declaration of Independence. This is July 4th, ain't it? I don't git yer meanin'."
"I mean, announcing like you just did, Cowboy, that we're goin' on our honeymoon. You did the same thing t'me on Memorial Day. Think my mouth was full then, too. We was sittin' right over there. Said somethin' bout me bein' special to ya."
"Well, y'are special to me Jack. N' yer always after me to feel safe about us, and I do feel safe right here at this house, with these people."
Margaret leaned over and tapped Ennis on the elbow. "You ever think of goin' to Niagra Falls? That's where we had our honeymoon in 1963, and it was just the most wonderful place. I think you'd like it."
"Yeah, I know all about your wedding in 1963, that's when ours shoulda been too." Ennis said this with a bit of a chip on his shoulder.
"Now Ennis, we talked about this." shushed Jack.
"I know, darlin'. We wouldn't have this angel girl sittin' here, nor Bobby,nor Jenny if we'd been allowed to go on and marry each other when Margaret and Harold did. Wouldn't give them up for nothin', but all them years we had to be apart, still ain't right, Jack!"
Every time this subject came up, Jack just wanted to hold Ennis till the pain and the anger went away. He knew that them living together year after year would be the only thing to help erase the memory of the loneliness, all those years of living without the other, day by day.
Margaret reached over to Ennis again. This time she took his hand in hers. "I know, Ennis. My twin brother and his partner waited 32 years, hoping something would change; someone would make sensible marriage laws, or drop all marriage restrictions all together."
"We made our vows to each other, had the family as our witnesses, but nothing is recorded, or legal. Don't matter so much to us whether it's recognized or not. We recognize it."
She nodded, looking at them with her lower lashes swimming, but nothing dropping down her cheeks yet."Maybe your brother and his . .uh, partner could do somethin' like we done." Ennis suggested helpfully.
"No, my dear, they can't. Keith's partner died this spring. That's why our return to Lightning Flat was delayed a few weeks. Went to Phillip's funeral and stayed on to try an' console Keith."
Junior had been so terrified of AIDS for her dad, and he could see it in her eyes. She had to ask. "Was it a long illness, Aunt Margaret?"
"No, dear, nothing like that. Phillip works . . .worked as a branch manager in a bank in the valley in southern California. There was a robbery. The robbers were young and nervous; drug users I hear. They shot and killed him, as a warning to the other hostages. He wasn't even supposed to be at work that day, was covering for a woman who suddenly went into labor. She gave birth to a boy about the same moment that Phillip died." By this time, the tears were running silently and unchecked down her face.
Harold could do nothing but hold her shoulders, and let her talk it out.
Junior asked, "Did that lady name her baby Phillip?"
"Yes, Junior, she did. She named him Phillip Keith Browerson. You are quite intuitive, aren't you, my dear?"
"Dunno, I just know what's right, and that was the right thing to do."
Jack said, "Please tell your brother we are sorry for his loss."
"Thank you, Jack. You see, our whole family loved Phillip, we feel like we lost another brother."
Ennis was silent. He was devastated thinking about poor Keith, waiting all those years for Phillip only to have him be killed. He thought that would be BEYOND HUMAN ENDURANCE. No other pain would equal that; if he lost Jack, life wouldn't be worth living. No way could he see himself having any life at all, if he were somehow to lose Jack. He thought 'God, if you're there, thank you for not having it in the cards for me to lose my Jack!
And then thinking about it some more, he thought 'An' let's be sure ta keep it that way, forever and ever, Amen. Okay?'
He reached over and took Margaret's hand, then let his tears roll down his face for the living Keith as much or more than for the deceased, Phillip.
Just then, JC (or Johnny as his contemporaries called him) came around with a hat filled with slips of paper. "Come on, pull a slip of paper, we're putting teams together, gonna play horseshoes. Grab one a them slips Jack, Ennis!"
He continued around till everyone had been placed on a team, and they began to play, and to bring themselves back into the present day and time.
The fireworks were planned for the next night, the 4th. Tonight, the crowning event was going to be the dessert. They had several kinds of cakes, more home made ice cream, two cherry pies, a pecan pie, a pumpkin pie, and the two rhubarb pies. Each dessert was already sliced into smallish pieces, allowing the excuse "Take two, they're small!" and so they did.
Author's Note:
Claire's Fresh Rhubarb Pie Recipe
4 cups chopped rhubarb
1 1/3 cups white sugar
6 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon butter
1 recipe pastry for a 9 inch double crust pie
DIRECTIONS:
Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C).
Combine sugar and flour.
Sprinkle 1/4 of it over pastry in pie plate.
Heap rhubarb over this mixture.
Sprinkle with remaining sugar and flour.
Dot with small pieces of butter. Cover with top crust.
Place pie on lowest rack in oven. Bake for 15 minutes.
Reduce oven temperature to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C),
continue baking for 40 to 45 minutes. Serve warm or cold.
tbc