A/N:

Kella? I have to admit, the smut in this chap? Epic, no?

Totally. Epic win. There's variety... there's epicness... there's just... everything you could want in a smutfic.

Mhm. Tots. S Meyer, who owns all apparently, prolly would frown alot if she read this.

Prolly. But I love our reviewers because they enjoy it just as much as we do, me thinks. But there's only one way to find out, so review! :)

Yes, please and thank you!

EPOV

Shit.

What the fuck was she doing here?

"Hey, Tanya." I said as Bella and I walked toward her down the hall. "What are you doing here?"

She pouted, but her eyes were mischievous. "I missed you. You didn't come home last night, or the night before. I was lonely without you, Eddie."

I sighed as I got closer to her, putting down a couple of bags as I fished out my keys. "I left you a message."

"Who's you're little friend?" She asked, eyeing my poor Bella in the worst way.

I stepped in front of Bella a bit, blocking her from Tanya's view. "This is Bella, my assistant. Bella, my girlfriend Tanya."

"Fiancée." She corrected.

"Either or." I said, opening the door and gesturing for Bella to go in. Once she was safely inside, I shut the door behind her.

"Edward, who is she?" Tanya asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

"My assistant. I had a shoot and she assisted me."

She raised an eyebrow, "You sure?"

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously?"

She sighed and looped her arms around my neck. "I missed you."

I pulled her into me and kissed her forehead. "I'll see you tonight. I have to develop these shots, then I'll be home."

"Well, that's what I wanted to tell you. I'm leaving tonight for Hong Kong."

I looked down at her. "Hong Kong?"

She nodded. "Emergency strategy meeting. "I'll be back by next Friday."

I leaned down and kissed her. "Be safe, okay?"

She hummed into my skin, smiling slightly. "I will. And Edward? Despite everything, I really do love you."

I kissed her forehead lightly. "I know. I love you too. Call me when you get there."

"Okay." She said, as she turned down the hall and left. After she was in the elevator I slouched against the closed door, sighing. I couldn't believe that this was happening. I was completely torn when it came to where my loyalties lay. One would think with my fiancée, but instead, I found my mind preoccupied with Bella. With my Bella. She was probably feeling hurt and jealous, and all I wanted to do was make sure Tanya never came anywhere near her again.

That was the moment I realized that I was now living for Bella.

BPOV

She was even more beautiful than I remember her being from the little I saw of her at Dr. Carlisle's office; she was even prettier than Natalie. Of course Edward would be with someone hotter than a model. I rolled my eyes and walked into his designated "studio within a studio" zone and flopped down on the couch, eying the door. They were probably fucking in the hall. I felt my stomach churn and I reached for the remote turning on the TV and blaring it loudly to drown out any possible noises and to attempt to drown out the voice in my head that was reminding me why this was such a bad idea.

I tried repeating what I knew, the truth about our situation in my head. One, Edward loves his fiance. Two, Edward doesn't care about you as more than a friend. Three, Edward and you have mind blowing sex, but that's all outside of a friendship. But wait, wasn't that what a good relationship was supposed to be? A friendship with great sexual chemistry? Ugh, this was no good. I lolled my head back against the couch and sighed in frustration.

My eyes clamped shut even tighter as I heard the door creak open.

EPOV

"Bella?" I called, pulling my bags into the room with me. "Bella?"

I saw her lift her head slowly, "Hm?"

"You ready for dinner?" The door shut behind me and I walked over to her, resting my arms on the back of the couch on either side of her, and my chin on top of her head.

"You sure you want to do dinner still?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"I dunno. Tanya came over here; you said she doesn't do that often. I figured maybe you two would want to..."

I put my cheek to her head and sighed. "She's going to Hong Kong until next week. She just wanted to tell me."

"Oh, okay."

I moved my arms to wrap around her and dropped my head to her shoulder. "You okay?"

She let out a soft sigh, and nodded. "Yeah, I just... I wasn't ready for that. To see you and her, like that. Which is silly because she's your fiance."

I sighed nuzzling the side of her neck a little. "But you're my Bella."

I heard her sniffle a bit, then her cheek was resting against my head. "Yeah."

"So please, just... know that? Don't let her get to you. She's not worth it."

"No... no, it's fine. It just surprised me is all." I felt her take a deep breath to try and shake off the feelings. "So dinner?"

I kissed the juncture of her neck and shoulder. "Wherever you want."

She twisted her head around and put a hand on my neck, kissing my lips fully. She pulled away slowly, her lips hovering above my own. "Um, I'm okay with whatever you want."

"No, no. Your choice, love. I'm taking you out, so you get to pick."

"Can I choose to skip dinner and just take you here now?" Bella asked with a smirk.

I furrowed my brow and kissed her fully on the lips. "I'd love that. But, I think you'll need real food. Besides, we have all night for me to show you why you put up with me."

"All night huh? In that case, we need carbs."

"Italian, then?"

"Lasagna?" She suggested, smiling.

"Okay. There's a mom and pop around the corner. You interested?"

She leaned in an kissed me again. "Definitely."

She went to stand up and I grabbed her bag. "Hey, baby?"

"Hm?" She asked, coming over to me.

"Do you have your iPod in here?"

"Mhm. It's in the the pocket."

I pulled it out and started scrolling through her music. "Baby we should make a play list for fucking. We could call it 'fucking each other'" I said, with a grin.

She rolled her eyes at me. "If you're going to talk about us having sex then we're never going to get food, because I'm strong and I'll just drag you back there" She said, nodding her head in the direction of the bedroom.

I turned and followed her out the door. "But we wouldn't have any music to fuck to cause I haven't made the play list yet!"

She swished over to me, and brushed her lips against my cheek as she whispered. "Do you really need music to drown out the sound of me moaning your name?" Finally her lips made contact.

I groaned and closed my eyes, pushing her into the elevator then folding her in my arms. "Baby, dontcha know? You could use it when you're with James and think of me."

"How do you know it's not the other way around already, and I think of James when you're fucking me?" She quirked an eyebrow. "That's mighty presumptuous of you."

I saw bright blazing fucking red. But instead of getting mad, I got even. "Why would you be with me if you really wanted to be with him? You have him, but face it love, you want me."

"You know, you're pretty arrogant for someone who almost just got caught." She smirked and kissed the corner of my mouth.

I sighed and leaned my head against her shoulder, thinking about Tanya and James. Would Tanya be going to him tonight? "Are you saying you don't want me?"

She sighed, then pressed a gentle kiss to my temple before whispering, "I'm saying I want you all the time, even without a play list to set a pace to; in fact, I kinda prefer our rhythm."

The elevator door opened and I extracted myself from her before leading her from the lobby to the street. "I think... I think you might be perfect."

Bella laughed a little, curling her hand with mine. "Maybe for you."

I kissed the back of her hand, "Always. Always for me."

I watched as she began to blush and, looked down at the ground shyly. I laughed and shook my head, opening the door to the restaurant for her and letting her step inside. "Hel-looo" The hostess said, as I put my hand on the small of Bella's back and started rubbing small circles.

"Two, please."

"Right this way..." The hostess said, locking her eyes on mine, then leading us to a table in the middle of the room, shaking her ass a bit. "If you don't mind, something a little more private. I haven't seen my girl in a while."

I felt Bella curl into me a little and the hostess raised an eyebrow and grunted before taking us to a booth in the back. I let Bella slip in first, and I sat next to her pulling her under my arm protectively.

I think the hostess said something, but I was too busy trying to hold Bella to pay attention. She kept inching farther and farther away from me. I didn't like it.

"Something wrong, love?"

"Just making room for the waitress."

I furrowed my brow and looked at her. "Excuse me?"

"The waitress was saying how she wished she had a boyfriend who took such good care of his sister as you did of me. You didn't respond, so I thought I'd be nice and let her experience it."

"Baby..." I shook my head, confused. "What? I... I'm here with you. I'm only looking at you. Thinking of you. I wasn't paying any attention to her."

"Oh, well good then." She said, smiling brightly up at me.

I laughed and kissed the side of her head. "Baby, you're ridiculous."

She grinned and picked up the menu, looking it over. "Don't even lie, you love it."

I hesitated. Did I? No, not really. I... cared for her, definitely, but I couldn't say that I loved her... yet. I looked back down at her and smiled before kissing her forehead again.

She laughed lightly, "Lighten up Edward, I didn't mean love love." I felt her hand slip under the table and over my thigh, rubbing it a little.

I sighed and put my head on her shoulder. "What looks good?"

"The spaghetti and meatballs looks good and you can't go wrong with a classic." She murmured, resting her cheek on my head. "Did you want to split it?"

"What? Like Lady and the Tramp?"

"No like you get a side plate, I get one too and we put what we want from the big plate onto the little ones. Duh." She replied, laughing lightly.

"I liked my idea better," I said, pouting a little and kissing the side of her neck.

I felt her hand slide dangerously up my thigh. "Well, I liked my original thought best. So can we just skip to dessert? All this nonsense of eating is just wasting time when you could be inside me."

I sucked on the side of her neck for a minute. "Baby, I'm a growing boy-- literally. Feed me."

She let out and exaggerated sigh, feigning annoyance. "Fine fine. Where's the waitress that wanted me dead so she could get inside your pants?"

I sighed and lifted my head, then saw the waitress shimmying her way over to us, a 'come fuck me smile' on her face. I pulled Bella's hand off my thigh and placed it over my hard on. "Yours."

BPOV

I smirked smugly at the waitress as she sauntered over swaying her hips so widely I was worried she'd hit someone with them. "Baby you ready to order?" She asked, staring right at him. I squeezed him and began moving my hand up and down his shaft through his pants.

"Spags and balls. Please."

She smiled at him, and licked her bottom lip. "Perfect. And to drink?"

"Bella?"

I smiled at him and didn't think twice before pressing my lips to his for a quick kiss. "Um, water will be fine." I look up at smiling as sweetly as I could, "thanks."

She tried her best to hide her scowl but it was all over her face - bitch wanted me dead. Whatever. I wrapped Edward's arm around me and snuggled up against him, kissing his neck softly. "Being too hot or too cold?"

He sighed, kissing the side of my head "Baby, right now I do not fucking care."

I laughed softly and stopped moving my hand against his crotch as my fingertips tiptoed up to the buttons of his jeans, popping them off one at a time.

He growled under his breath, tilting his head back against the booth's wall and shutting his eyes. "Oh, God..."

I smirked against the skin of his neck and placed a hot open mouth kiss against it as my hands pushed his jeans down a little and pulled his dick through the slit of his boxers. "Baby?" I whispered into his ear.

His was breathing so heavily through his nose I could hear every inhale and exhale. "What's up, love?"

I gripped his cock in my hand spreading his pre-cum around his length for lubrication. "Baby, if I beg you to, will you cum for me?"

"If you keep it up, I'll cum right now."

My lips fastened to his neck, sucking at his pulse point as my hand slid up and down his shaft in fast hard movements. He began panting, gulping down air audibly as my thumb grazed over his tip.

"Cover your lap with the table cloth." I breathed into his ear.

"What?" He said quietly.

"Just do it. I want to see if you can fuck my mouth as well as you fuck me between my legs."

He groaned and I heard his breath quicken. And just like I asked he lifted the tablecloth over his lap and I bent down, to wrap my mouth around him.

"Fuck Bella.." he hissed, sliding his hand under the cloth and gripping my hair as his hips thrust into my mouth. I hummed against him and I heard him gasp as my hand slid down past his shaft and I cupped his balls, pulsating my hand around them. I moved my mouth as far down on his length as I could go, feeling his tip tickle the back of my throat. He groaned again and murmured something I didn't quite understand. A few seconds later his hips thrust up, shoving his cock even further into my mouth and I felt his cum shoot off down my throat. I continued to moan against his erection as the last droplets of cum escaped his tip. I pulled my mouth away from him, and licked him clean and dry putting him back in his pants and buttoning him up before reemerging from under the tablecloth.

I sat up and straightened my shirt, running a hand through my hair and facing him.

He looked at me wide eyed and shook his head slowly. "Don't... Don't ever leave."

I laughed and nodded my head towards the waitress who was bringing our food. "Perfect timing."

We ate in a comfortable silence, periodically asking a random question, or making a comment about a good restaurant we'd been to in the city.. I picked at a meatball and took a couple bites of pasta, but the rest was all him. Note to self: don't drink your pseudo-boyfriend's cum right before your eat. He asked for a to-go box for what was left when he was done and we made quick work of paying then leaving.

I didn't see the waitress come near us after she dropped off our food and take a glance Edward's post-cum glow. That's right, I can do that, I felt like saying to her. Though, a tiny voice in the back of my head did wonder if Tanya couldn't and didn't do it better.

"Thanks again for today Edward. I had a lot of fun." I said as we began walking back towards his studio.

His lips grazed my temple as he spoke, "I loved having you there."

I leaned my head against him as we walked slowly, hand in hand. I loved this and hated it all at the same time. The guilt when I acknowledged its existence, was killing me. How could I be doing this to James? What was worse was it wasn't even strictly sexual; I genuinely enjoyed being around Edward. That just made the guilt multiply. But I liked that I could feel like this, like I wasn't a total prude. I evidently did have a sexual side, a ferocious one at that. Only, it wasn't directed at the right person.

Edward's arm wrapped around my shoulder protectively pulling me closer to his side as I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I pulled it out and sighed, stopping in my tracks.

"Hello?"

"Hey babe it's me."

"Hey James. What's up? I thought you were at work?" Did that seem too rushed? Too accusatory?

He chuckled into the phone. "Yeah, I am. I'm just on a break. I thought I might swing by for a minute; I haven't really seen you much since Thursday night - which was AWESOME." God he sounded like such a meat head sometimes.

"Oh, well um... actually I'm with a friend right now. I won't be home til late."

"A friend?"

"Yeah, James. You know people outside of you that I socialize with?" Ugh, the guilt was misfiring and hitting him.

Fortunately he just laughed it off. "Chill out Bells, I was just asking. Anyway, so I'm done here at 5, can I swing by your place with breakfast around 6?"

"James, tomorrow is Sunday. You cannot wake me up at 6am on a Sunday."

"But baby, I haven't seen you in almost half a week."

I sighed. This was something that I had issues with - his lack of being around. It didn't slip past me that I had stopped caring if he was there or not, since I'd met Edward. "6am is early... and I think I may spend the night at my friend's. But what if we meet up for your dinner around 9?"

"Okay, babe. That sounds good. Do you want me to pick you up at your friend's place?"

"No!" I practically shouted into the phone, looking at Edward who had alternated between looking at me and the floor the entire conversation. "I mean... no, I'll just meet you at my place."

"You sure?" He said laughing again. "You aren't staying the night at your other boyfriend's house are you?" He asked, jokingly. Nevertheless, my face paled.

"Bella?" He echoed.

"Oh, no I'm here..."

"God I was just joking. You and your friend should go out for drinks so you can loosen up. Tell her to buy first round. But hey listen - I just wanted to call and say hi. We're on for tomorrow, yea?"

"Yeah, tomorrow, 9am."

"OK, love you Bells."

"Love you too."

I hung up the phone, staring at it for a moment before glancing up at Edward. His jaw was clenched and he didn't look happy.

EPOV

I couldn't be pissed. It wasn't right. She wasn't mine. She didn't answer to me. She belonged to... him. I sighed and let Bella into the elevator ahead of me. This wasn't going the way I wanted.

"Are you leaving?" I asked curtly, folding my arms across my chest and leaning against the wall. I couldn't look at her. She wasn't... fuck.

I could feel her watching me as she took a step closer. "Not unless you want me to."

I shook my head, "I don't. But I thought you might need to."

I felt her hand come up to cup my cheek, and I could see her smiling happily at me. "Then I'm yours until you have to go home."

I looked down at her, still not feeling quite right. "Until next Thursday?"

"Next Thursday?"

I nodded.

"Oh, um... well then, no. But I'm yours until 8 tomorrow morning."

I sighed, and leaned my head against the side of the elevator. "Are you sure you want to spend the night, then? I wouldn't want to get you in trouble."

"Edward, it's fine. But if you don't want me to stay, just let me know. I promise I won't be offended."

I shook my head and furrowed my brow. "I do want you to stay. I'm not asking you to leave, I just want it to be what you want. You sounded like you wanted to get back to someone on the phone."

"The only person I wanted to get back to when I was on the phone, was the person in front of me."

I sighed and the elevator opened onto my floor. We walked to my studio in silence, and I walked around the space thinking. "I'm sorry. I just don't know how to handle him... with you.... together."

She laughed coldly, and I almost shivered from the chill of it. " I know the feeling. When I saw you and Tanya interacting earlier, I came in here and just about had an aneurysm." She started, taking a deep breath. "But, I don't want to walk away from this."

I turned to her in disbelief. "I wasn't saying that."

She cocked her head to the side and looked at me. "Then I'm confused. What are you saying?"

I ran my hand through my hair turning back away from her. "That... I want that with you. As fucked up as this is, Bella, I don't regret it. And maybe that's why I react the way I do to you and... him. It just sucks when I realize that that's not what we have."

"You want what with me?" She asked, holding her breath.

I shrugged, watching the last bits of sun disappear over the horizon. "Something normal... something right. Something you don't have to hide. Something where it's me calling you on a break, and me having breakfast with you in the morning. Something where it's only you and me."

Shit I'd gone too far. It was too much and now it was too late to take it back.

I felt her move closer to me, wrapping her arms around my waist and pressing her cheek to my back. "Edward, what we have may not be normal, but it feels more right than anything I've ever felt before." I felt her suck in a shaky breath. I really didn't want her to cry. "But would you really be willing to leave a girl you've been with, been in love with for 7 years... for someone like me, who you don't love and barely know?"

I put my hands over hers. She was right; I didn't love her. But I felt like I could, someday. "If I knew we would last, there wouldn't be anything to keep me from you. Not even a seven year thing. But don't you wish it were different? Do you ever think about what would happen if I hadn't come back that night?" I did. I thought about it all the time. And in each scenario, I was miserable without her.

I felt her nod. "Of course I wish it were different Edward. I wish I could wake up next to you every morning and fall asleep with you every night, and have sex with you in every restaurant in Seattle without worrying about one of us getting caught by a significant other." She added, pressing a kiss into my back. " But I'd rather have this for all it's fucked up elements, than not have known you at all. So I thank my lucky stars that you did come back that night and I try not to think of the alternative."

That was the moment I realized I couldn't leave her. If we were destroyed, it would be because it was what she wanted and I'd let her go. I knew I didn't love Bella, but what scared me was that I realized that I might get there, and it wouldn't take any time at all. I turned around in her arms and tucked her head under my chin. "I want you to be comfortable."

"Then don't let me go." She whispered.

I kissed the top of her head. "I never want to."

She looked up at me and I kissed her fully on the lips. I was hers, fully and completely for now, as she was mine. I pushed her up against the window, letting my hands roam across her body and tugging at her skin, needing desperately to be close to her. "Mm, Edward..."

My name falling from her lips made me harder than ever, and I pushed my hips forcefully into her. "This.. this is what you do to me, Bella. Only you. Only ever you."

She moaned and tossed her head back, so I kissed my way down the column of her throat and across the cleavage that was peeking out of her v-neck top. "I think you're perfect, you know. The way your blush wanders down you neck and onto your tits... fuck, Bella. You're beautiful."

I reached down and pulled off her top, tossing it to the side, and leaving her in a white cotton bra. Sexiest piece of underwear on the planet. I wrapped my arms around the middle of her back, forcing her to arch into me so that my mouth could work over her. "Bella... baby... your skin tastes so fucking good-- like vanilla. It takes so much strength for me to tear my lips away from you."

Her hands pushed into my hair and she started rubbing my scalp, pushing me closer and closer into her chest. I undid her bra, and pulled away enough to toss it to the side before kissing across the same path as before, but this time pulling her nipple into my mouth and teasing it with my tongue.

"Fuck... Edward... Shit..."

I pulled away and switched to the other, letting my hand come up to keep company with the abandoned one. "Edward... Edward, please... no teasing. Please..."

I hummed against her breast, and smiled into her flesh. "If that's what you want, love."

She nodded vigorously, her eyes half hooded with lust.
"I want that... I want you in me. I want... I want part of you."

I didn't know how to tell her that in that moment she had all of me. I pulled back and tore off my tee shirt, then pushed down my jeans, groaning as my hard on sprang free. I look up at her, and she was looking down at my cock. "Condom?" I whispered.

She nodded, never taking her eyes off me. "In my bag."I kicked off my jeans and rifled through her bag until I found it, and started to open it.

"Wait," Bella called, and when I looked up at her my breath caught in my throat. She'd disposed of her jeans, and was still pressed up against the window, her mouth slightly agape. She curled her fingers and motioned for me to come over. "I wanna do it."

I nodded, and went to her, handing her the package. I watched in awe as she removed the rubber, first blowing out the tip then putting it into her mouth. Oh, god...

she sank down on her knees, and put her hands on my ass and leaned in, taking my cock into her mouth and rolling on the condom. I closed my eyes and my head fell back as I felt her nose graze my pubic bone before she came back up, and released me with a pop. I pulled her up again and smashed her up against the wall. "That was the sexiest fucking thing you've ever done for me."

Her forehead found mine, and my cock brushed the inside of her thigh. "Hotter... hotter than the restaurant."

I nodded, and leaned in, delighting in the sensation of her lips brushing against mine. "Hotter. But you're perfect."

She moaned and I pressed my lips to hers, and hitched one of her legs over my hip and the tip of my cock pushed against her entrance. "Bella... Bella... my Bella. I want you... Always."

Her head leaned against mine and she dug her heel into my ass, pushing me into her. "Then have me."

I groaned as I felt my cock stretching her, and the way she was pressing her tits into me, was pure bliss. I gave her a moment to adjust before I started to thrust into her, not really easing into it, but trying to give her anything she's ever wanted in a lover. I wanted her to feel wanted, desired, and I supposed... loved. I groaned and grunted into the skin on her shoulder as she panted in my ear. "Oh, Edward... Edward... Oh... shit... I... baby, I'm gonna... fuck..."

I thrust into her harder and in every thrust I moved my pelvis in a circle against her clit making her shiver. "Come on, Baby... please, Bella... cum... on... my... cock... give it to me, Bella, let me see you cum."

Just like that, she tossed her head back and her pussy clamped down on my cock; so hard I could barely move. She started to relax a little, so I kept pushing into her, seeking my own release. "Fuck, Bella... so tight.." I moaned as I exploded into her, her head lolling against my shoulder. I eased my softening cock in and out of her, not completely ready to leave her warmth, and definitely not ready to leave these feelings behind. I reached behind me and gently released her leg, then pulling her down onto the ground with me. She wrapper her arms tightly around my neck and I held onto her for dear life. It felt like if I left her, I wouldn't even know who I was anymore. She was panting into my shoulder and reached up to push the hair from her forehead, placing a small kiss on the newly exposed skin.

"Don't ever leave."

"I can't walk away from you Edward."

I laughed a little, kissing her lovingly (lovingly?!) on the forehead. "Well, I know that. I'm still inside you."

She ran her fingers through my hair, smiling up at me. "And that's where I'll always want you to be."

I leaned down and kissed her again, passionately as though kissing her was necessary for me to keep breathing... to keep living.

So what the fuck was I going to do when this all ended?