Secrets: Mine, Yours and Ours

by theotherbella

Bella and Edward are both in serious relationships that have found their way to a couples counselor. What happens when Edward finds out something that could destroy them both? Will he tell Bella, or keep the truth hidden? Huge OOC... beware!

11. Chapter 11

Hey kels
Hi Bels

missed you
aww, missed you too. It's been awhile, huh?

yeah. Kinda. I don't know what to do with myself. We have news though, huh?
The one about how I'm preggers?

Okay, well that's news to me...

Oh, you must mean the OTHER news then. About the Tattward/Inkella contest we entered!

Oh, yeah, that :P
Yeah so go check it out! The title is: Where The Wild Things Are and both 'Lala and I have it posted.

Yup yup. Then vote for us? Pretty pretty please with a cherry on top?
Tots, so back to this lovely awesome best thing ever story. It's totally worth the wait, right?

i think so. I like this one. Kind of a lot. And I like writing with you. It's seven million different kinds of fun :)
So who cares if we don't own the characters and some chick in Utah named Steph Meyers does, right? Cuz it's fun breaking out of the fade to black sometimes... or in this story's case ALL the time ;)

hehe... SMUT FIC! it's just nice to like not break up the story with a random blackness. And then turn the light on, only to find that there are no pillows. And you forgot probably the single greatest experence of your life time...
... the answer being the first rewrite of the honeymoon I ever read?

Yup :)

So peeps, here's the deal: why lie, we love reviews! So leave 'em :)

---

BPOV

We finished watching the movie, but I wasn't able to follow it since we had missed the first twenty minutes which apparently had been crucial to understanding the reasoning behind the plot twists. As the lights turned on, I moved to stand. Edward stood up right after me and I reached behind me to grab his hand as we walked single file out of the aisle and down to the exit doors. We hung back against the wall of the theater as people filtered out and got into cabs. My arms were wrapped around his waist as he leaned against the wall, his arms wrapped around me identically. His head rested on my head and I breathed him in. "Chinese food or Japanese?" He asked out of nowhere.

"Um, Japanese." I murmured into his chest. "Books or movies?" I asked sighing into him.

"Oo. Depends on the book or movie in question. love or marriage?"

"Both someday, I hope." I answered honestly. My body froze as I realized what I was eluding to. "I, I mean in gen--"

He chuckled against me, his laughter vibrating against my body. "I gotcha. You should have that, Bella. You deserve it." He murmured placing a kiss into my hair.

"How did you propose to Tanya?"

His body went rigid and I felt him tilt his head back away from mine. "W-What?"

I laughed a little looking up at up. "Edward I didn't ask you to explain jet propulsion fusion to me... how did you propose to Tanya?"

"I... uh... well, I bought a ring and we went to dinner at her favorite restaurant, and I proposed to her. But she didn't like the ring, so we took it back and she picked out her own. But then I had to do the proposing all over again. And the second time was in bed. After two bottles of wine."

That didn't sound like Edward at all. "You proposed to her drunk?"

He leaned his head back against the wall, laughing and looking to the side as if reminiscing. "Well, the second time, yeah. Drunk and angry."

"Why did you even bother then? It doesn't sound like you wanted to do it."

He shrugged, his eyes not meeting my own. "I'd been with her for five years at the time. My sister was the one who really talked me into it. Rose... Rose likes Tanya. A lot. And frankly? At the time, there wasn't anything better coming my way. I figured that she was what I was supposed to have in life. And I suppose, at the time I still kind of loved her."

I laughed sadly and leaned back against him, nodding. I knew all too well what it felt like to think you should stay with someone because you didn't think anyone better would come around. "And since then?"

His armed pulsed around my waist and he rested his chin back on my head. "Now I have you. And you're... Bella, I never imagined that I would ever get to be with someone as wonderful as you. Not in a million years."

"Edward, I'm still not sure that you haven't been seeing me with rose colored glasses. There is nothing wonderful about me. I'm average; everything from my hair and eye color to my height and mannerisms... all average."

"Average to you, amazing to me."

I laughed and shook my head pulling away to look at him. "You're nuts if you think I'm anything but typical. I hope you know that."

"Well, you're typically awesome. I know that."

I laughed harder and rolled my eyes. "Dork. Come on lets go find dessert to bring back to the hotel room. I'm craving something sweet, not cheesy." I smirked unlacing his arms from me and grabbing his hand. He entwined my fingers around his and let me pull him up off the wall. He chuckled, placing a chaste kiss on my cheek as we took off from the theater in search of sweets. We passed by a bakery that had a flashing sign that said "cheesecake" in the window. He looked at me nodding to it and I scrunched my nose shaking my head.

After roaming around for what felt like an hour, we finally settled on donuts from a 24 hour donut/coffee shop. "Favorite kind of donut?" I asked as we looked through the cases of tastiness.

"Boston Creme. You?"

"old fashioned - glazed." He nodded and ordered one of each, as well as 2 cups of coffee. We walked over to the coffee station. I noticed him watching me out of the corner of my eye. "What?"

"Nothing, I'm just memorizing how you take your coffee." I looked up at him and smiled. "Ton of milk, no sugar. You?"

"Ton of sugar, no milk."

"Lactose intolerant?" I asked. Hey, it's a legit question.

He laughed shaking his head as he stirred the sugar into his coffee. "No, obviously not if I'm eating a creme filled donut." I blushed at my oversight and he kissed my cheek before taking my coffee off the counter and nudging his head to the door. "Come on love, let's go home."

I sighed and nodded, taking the bag of donuts from his full hands as we walked out of the shop and down the street. We ate our donuts and sipped our coffee as we lazily made our way through the streets of Manhattan, getting slightly turned around a few times as we tried to find our hotel. We talked about the most random things; favorite childhood snacks, political views, the death of billboard advertising. It was all very random, but great at the same time. The more I learned about Edward the more I wanted to know. I just couldn't get enough of him; he was like a drug to me.

We had long since disposed of our empty coffee cups and paper bag of pastries once we rounded the corner and spotted it in the middle of the block. We laughed and both exhaled with relief as we approached the doors. "Only took half our evening to find this place again." He joked as he opened the door and gestured for me to enter. I smiled and nodded in thanks, as I stepped through reaching back for his hand. He took it quickly, his other arm wrapping around my waist as he stopped us and sprinkled kisses along my neck and shoulder, in the middle of the lobby. I giggled at his light touch and moved to walk towards the elevators. He whined behind me, "I wasn't done." My head spun to the side and I grinned. "I didn't think either of us were. I just wanted to get us to the elevators. If I remember correctly this was the spot you mentioned wanting to fuck me in as well?" I saw his Adam's apple bob up and down as he gulped and nodded. Behind him someone cleared their throat, and I peer around him to see an older couple in their late 40s. Rather than blush at what they'd undoubtedly overheard, my confidence came through and I smiled towards them. "Sorry about that. Though I think we will wait for the next elevator. You go on ahead and take the next one." The woman scowled and I wasn't sure if it was because of my brazen attitude or because she was jealous that she had to fuck the man next to her rather than my Edward. The gentleman next to her chuckled and shook his head. "No, you two go right ahead. We have no plans for the elevator ourselves."

I saw Edward's body shake as he tried to contain his laughter. He still hadn't turned to face them, but the expression on the woman's face when the elevator doors dinged and he did face them was priceless. It was a mixture of shock and jealousy. That's right he and I are about to desecrate this elevator right now.I thought to myself, as I smiled sweetly at them both as we stepped inside.

EPOV

I let the elevator go up five floors before I pressed the stop button. I turned to Bella, "Condom?"

She grinned at me devilishly and held up the packet. Then I attacked her. My lips found hers first and I pressed her up against the wall of the elevator. She moaned against my mouth, and I started running my hands up and down the sides of her dress. "Baby," I moaned into her skin, moving my lips across her jaw and neck. "I love you in this color, but really... right now... it serves no purpose." I felt her breath coming out in short pants and I ripped the dress from her body, leaving her completely naked and at my mercy. "Baby, I don't think you should ever wear underwear again." She nodded vigorously and smashed my lips to hers again, letting one hand come up to cup her breast, rolling the nipple in between my fingers. "Shit, fuck... Edward..."

"What, baby... tell me what you want."

Bella moaned again and thrust her fingers into my hair. "Fuck me Edward... I want your cock... now."

I smirked into her skin and pulled away, pulling down my pants and boxers just enough to free my raging hard on. I leaned my head against her shoulder. "Fuck, Baby... you make me so fucking hard."

I felt her hand come down and fist around my shaft and I moaned into her skin. "I love how hard you get for me... I want you in me though; filling me up and making me cum. Please, Edward... make me yours."

I grabbed the condom from her hand and ripped it open then rolled it on. I hitched her leg up over my hip and positioned myself at her entrance. "Bella... Baby... "

"Do it, Edward." She said, smashing her face to mine and forcing me into her. I moaned as I filled her, and she pulled me as tightly to her as she possibly could. We were both panting against each other and at first, I couldn't bring myself to move. It was like I needed to be in her... to be with her. But then she wiggled her fucking hips, and I had to move. I just fucking... had to. I started slowly at first, listening to her moans and squeaks as I moved in and out of her, keeping my head on her shoulder. I wanted her to remember that this wasn't about just having hot monkey sex in an elevator; this was about me loving her more than I could possibly stand.

I gasped slightly when I realized what I had just thought. Love. Love and Bella together in the same sentence? No. No. No fucking way. It wasn't... I couldn't... shit.

I did.

I started pounding into her, hard and fast, trying to literally pound the love out of me. But it back fired, it was as though with every thrust and every moan, I fell a little bit more. I wanted to take care of her, I wanted to be with her, and hold her when she was happy or when she cried. I wanted to be there to love her. I wanted everything you're supposed to have... with Bella.

"Shit... shit... Edward... I'm gonna... I'm gonna... FUCK!" She came all over my cock, and I thrust into her twice more before I blew my load into the condom. I eased myself in and out of her slowly before finally pulling out, resting my forehead against hers with my eyes closed. I kissed her softly, touching my fingertips to her cheek.

"You okay, baby?"

I felt her nod against me, setting her leg down gently but keeping her arms tight around me. "Yeah... yeah. I'm fine."

I let my hands slip down her sides and I gently massaged her muscles before I pulled away and took off the condom and cleaning up. I looked back at Bella, who was still naked.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

She was biting her lip and turning the sweetest shade of pink. "My... my dress... it's ripped, and--"

"Shit, baby, I'm sorry." I said, going back over to her and wrapping my body around her. I pulled away after a second, unbuttoning my shirt. "Here, take this."

She took it from me, puzzled. "You're going to go out there shirtless?"

I raised an eyebrow, "You'd rather go out there naked?"

She shrugged into my shirt and began buttoning it. "Point taken."

I pressed the stop button again and pulled Bella into my side.

"Are you okay?"

I laughed into her hair. "Yeah, are you?"

She nodded against my chest. "Mhm. You just... I dunno. Seemed a little distracted at the end. Just want to make sure it was good for you; I mean it was a weird angle.. and I--"

"No no no. Nothing like that, Baby. It was great... you... you were great." I kissed the top of her head again, trying to push the butterflies out of my stomach. But it was like every beat of my heart kept reminding me. I love her... I love her... I love her...

But I couldn't. There wasn't any possible way I could let this happen. Bella and I couldn't be in love. Could we?
She looked up at me furrowing her brow and looking concerned. "You sure? Then what is it?"

I ran my hand up and down her side as the elevator lurched to a stop. "Nothing, Baby. I can't believe that I get to have you whenever I want."

She stood up on her toes and kissed my neck, then nuzzled the spot with her nose. "Mhm. Whenever you want, for however long you want."

I wrapped my arms around her and we awkwardly walked down the hallway to our room. She let us in, and I watched her as she flicked on the lights and closed the curtains. I did. I loved her. I wanted this to be our apartment and our space where she and I could be together, fully and completely. I physically ached with my desire to be with her; to be a part of her. I needed her. I went to her and wrapped my arms around her from behind, kissing her neck. "I'm so lucky that I'm with you."

Bella leaned her head against me, sliding her arms over mine, rubbing them slowly. "I'm pretty sure I'm the luckier of the two of us. Not only are you here with me, but you came back for me... twice now."

I nuzzled her neck, "No, only once. And... I can't be without you, Bella. I thought you knew?"

She turned around in my arms and looped her arms around my neck, "I can't either Edward. Not again, not ever. I... I care for you too much now."

I moved to put my head back on her shoulder, kissing the side of her neck. "We won't Bella. We won't. I... I need you. I know it's not fair, and I know I have no right to ask you to stay with me, but I have to. Bella... I can't without you. I just fucking... can't."

BPOV

He just sounded so sad. I gripped him tighter, pulling our bodies closer to together. He let out a long breath over my shoulder and squeezed my waist. We stayed like that for a few minutes, just hugging each other. I loved him. I could never leave him. It was killing me not being able to say it. But it had been what, a month? There was no logical justification that this would really be love after just a month, was there? I took a deep breath trying to shaking the intense feelings away. My body tore from his and I looked up at him. "Come on baby, let's go to bed." He nodded, kissing my forehead and following me into the bedroom. He moved to his side of the bed, turning down the covers as I unbuttoned the shirt he'd give me to wear and went to hang it up the the closet, not bothering to change into actual pjs. By the time I got back he was already under the covers, lying on his back. I crawled in beside him and curled up against his body.

"Baby?" I whispered as I pressed my cheek into his chest. "Hm?" He he hummed as one arm wound around me pulling me even closer and his other began to trace faint lines up and down my spine. "Baby, never think you have no right to ask me to stay. If anything, you never need to. I'm not going to leave you Edward. This is it, you and I." I love you, I love you, I love you. I wanted add, but I bit my lip, rubbing my cheek against his bare skin.

His nose nuzzled against the top of my head as he pressed a soft kiss into my hair. "Promise?"

I lifted my head looking directly at him. "I do."

EPOV

She does...

Fuck.

But not so fuck at the same time. Isn't this what I wanted? Someone to just... be with me? No questions asked, nothing asked of me. Just... to be together.

Yes.

I wanted Bella... and I wanted to be loved by her.

I squeezed her tighter to my chest and tangled our legs. "Bella, that's it then. I won't let you go. I can't do it. Not unless I thought it's what you really wanted."

BPOV

My lips brushed against his as I shook my head, running my foot up and down his calf. "What I really want is you."

He murmured against my lips quietly, "You have me."

I smiled and cupped his jaw with one hand as I slid over him, kissing his lips softly. His mouth moved against mine fluidly as his hands slid down and brushed along my sides. He rolled us onto our sides as one hand slid up to the back of my neck, pushing my face against his harder. I moaned and felt his tongue slip into my mouth massaging my own. We made out like a couple of horny teenagers for what seemed like hours, our hands never slipping below each others hips, our mouths not delving below the collar bone. We just inhaled and soaked up each others taste and touch. He slowly pulled away as we both panted and gasped for air, our chests heaving dramatically. His lips gently brushed over my cheeks and the bridge of my nose before placing a firm open mouth kiss on my forehead. I sighed contently and snuggled up to him, pressing my face into the crook of his neck and inhaling deeply. His arms pulled me tighter and I felt his face rest against my head.

"Good night love." He whispered, peppering kisses into my hair.

"Mmm... goodnight baby." I replied, sliding my arms up and weaving my fingers through his hair playing with his strands idly.

This was heaven. If I could fall asleep with him like this for the rest of my life, I would be nothing shy of blissfully happy.

The following morning after three rounds of middle-of-the-night sex, I woke up achy and sore, much like the first night we spent together. His arms were wound tightly against me and his face was buried in the flat of my stomach just below my breasts. His knee was bent and both of my legs wrapped around it. As I woke up, seeing the brightness of the sun trying to poke through the thick curtains I smiled and ran my fingers lazily through his hair. I loved waking up to him, with him, near him. Anything involving him being in the same bed as me when I woke up was an excellent start to the day. I scratched his head lightly and he groaned nuzzling his face into my stomach. I laughed a little, my body shaking with reverberations. He rubbed his face against my stomach again placing a few soft kisses just above my belly button. "What time is it?" He murmured with a voice full of sleep. "Umm..." I lurched forward a bit sitting up to see the clock. "A little after 8."

"Do you remember what time we finished the last round?" He asked, as he pressed open mouth kisses on my stomach. "Uhh..." I leaned back, reveling in the feel of his mouth. Fuck, was this feeling evergoing to die down? "I think around 6?"

"Good. Two hours is more than enough recovery time." I chuckled against him. "Aren't you a little sore... or tired... or sick of me?"

He peered up at me, eyes half opened and a lazy grin spread across his lips."No. How could I be? Are you sore, tired or sick of me?"

"No, well a little sore... but not tired or sick of you. Never sick of you." I murmured as he crawled over me. "Good." He whispered as his lips grazed against mine teasingly before swiping back over them and sucking my bottom lip in. He released my lip slowly, resting his forehead against mine. "Well I guess if you're sore, I'll just have to make you feel better..." He said trailing off as he peppered kisses down my chest and past where his lips had been on my stomach moments ago. "Fuck..." I breathed as I felt his mouth suck lightly on the skin on top of my mound. I felt one of his fingers gently part my lips and slide from my entrance up to my clit and back down. "Is this okay baby?" He asked as his lips continued their descent. I pushed down on his touch and he chuckled against my clit. "I'll take that as a yes." He commented as his lips pulled my swollen nub into his mouth and two of his fingers slid slowly inside my aching core. "Edward..." I moaned as I arched my back. How was it that I could go months without fucking James, and thought nothing of going through 11 of 12 condoms with Edward in the span of not even 24 hours? Any thoughts of James vanished as I felt his teeth scrape against my clit. "Baby, I want to taste you. I want to feel you cum and lick you clean. Can you do that?" He growled as his tongue slid down my slit, licking at the wetness that poured from me. "Ungh... Edward..." panted as his fingers picked up speed and began curving just so they hit my sweet spot on every inward thrust. "EDWARD SHIT!" I screamed as he took my clit in once more, nibbling lightly on it. "FUCK... OH GOD!" I moaned fisting his hair in my hands and pushing his face harder against my button of nerves. His fingers continued pumping hard and fast. "God, Edward.. FUCK GET INSIDE ME!" I groaned arching my back up.

Apparently he didn't need to be asked twice and his head shot up quickly as he reached for the last condom in the box, rolling it on and thrusting into me hard. "OH FUCK!" He groaned as he settled inside me, his body hovering over mine. "I'm so sorry baby... I just.. shit, when you say things like that it just..." He apologized, panting slightly as he looked down at me. Yeah it fucking hurt, and I'd be paying for it later, but there was nothing like feeling Edward inside me. My hand reached up and wrapped around the back of his neck pushing his face down so that my lips could move against his. I arched my hips up, grinding against his and encouraging him to move. He pulled his lips away and rested his forehead against mine as he began moving in and out. His movements were slow but deep and I could tell he was holding back, trying not to hurt me. "Edward," I breathed, staring up into his amazing green eyes. "Faster please, I want you to cum. Please baby."

"You sure? I don't... I want you to be okay."

I smiled at his concern for me. "Baby, you're inside me; I'm more than okay." I whispered pressing my lips against his softly. He smiled and let out a sigh as he began moving faster. I moved one of my hands between us and began rubbing my clit trying to get me over the edge with him. "Baby I can feel you..." He grunted as his cheeks flushed pink and I could feel a layer of sweat forming as his forehead pressed against mine. "You're close." He finished as his face dropped and he nuzzled my neck. I bent my knees up, pulling them higher and closer to his waist, feeling him go even deeper. "God baby, you feel amazing... every time." He moaned into my shoulder. "Cum baby," I whispered. "I want to feel you cum." He groaned as one of his hands shot up to my hip, holding it up as he pounded into me.

I didn't think he could hit my g-spot in missionary but apparently not only was it possible, but it was possible to hit it repeatedly over... and over. "FUCK EDWARD!" I moaned loudly, as my other hand slid down his back to his ass pushing him even harder. "Baby... baby... I'm so close.. I'm going to cum for you.." I panted into his ear as I sucked lightly on his neck. He growled into my neck and bit down. I bucked my hips even harder against his as my wall clenched and my eyes saw stars from the intensity of the orgasm. He continued pounding into me over and over again. Still hitting my sweet spot and it wasn't long after my orgasm began simmering that I felt the build up again. "Edward shiiiit... I'm going to.."

"Baby can you cum again for me? Please baby. Fucking milk my cock again. Your pussy feels so good when you squeeze my shaft." He picked up the pace even more and he drilled into me, his dick hitting my g-spot repeatedly and before I had completely settled from the first orgasm, my body went over the edge again. "EDWARD, UNGH!! FUCCCCCK!" I mewed into his ear biting down on his neck as I rode out the second wave that seemed to roll on for ages. He pounded into me twice more before stilling and letting go into the condom. He moved in and out slowly as his orgasm settled and he sucked on my neck, breathing heavily through his nose. He laid there on top of me for a few moments, trying to steady his breath. "You... fuck Bella.. you're perfect." He murmured against my skin, kissing down my neck shoulder and along my collar bone. I hummed contently, "you're pretty wonderful yourself." I felt him smile against my chest as his lips darted to my clavicle kissing it softly before rolling off me.

I turned on my side to face him and he did the same, facing me. "So another box? We're going to put a child of a Trojan employee through college by the time we finally stop needing them."

Crap. No, I didn't mean... shit. Brilliant Bella, he gives you multiple orgasms and you bring up children. Genius at work, really. "I-I mean, until I get on... on the pill." I stuttered out hopelessly. Ugh. He smiled and nodded against the pillow. "Either way."

Wait what? What does that mean? Is he? Does he? No.... I scoffed in my head.

He couldn't, mean what I thought he did right? He wasn't... he didn't... we weren't...

Were we in love?

EPOV

As I looked at her, after her until we stopped needing them comment, she looked like her brain was combusting. The skin on her forehead was creased and folded over itself, and I reached up to smooth it out.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

Bella looked like she was debating in her head, and spoke hesitantly. "What... what did you mean by 'either way'?"

I was really, really hoping she wasn't going to say that. But she did... and now I had to deal with it. I leaned in and nuzzled her face with mine. "Baby, if we do this... we're together, right? So then, if we... and it gets to that point then... yeah."

"If we what? And what point? And yeah what?" She asked, looking so confused. Wasn't it obvious?

I sighed again and buried my face in her shoulder. "Bella if we... you know... if we're... if you're mine. If you're really mine."

She kept pushing, "I am... so if... then...?"

"Then we won't need anything because it won't matter."

"I'm really yours now Edward. So what are you saying?" She pulled away and looked at me, still not getting it.

I snapped my eyes shut and took a deep breath before I whispered. "If we wanted a baby, Bella. If we got to that point where having a rubber didn't make a damn difference because we wanted a bit of the two of us... together. For always." I loosened my grip on her, preparing myself for her to pull away and yell at me. I'd stepped over the line, and I knew it. But I couldn't take it back. And oddly enough I didn't want to.

She smiled in understanding and snuggled back into me, wrapping her arms tightly around me. "That sounds like a nice idea... eventually."

I sat back and looked at her, "What do you mean?"

"Um.." She blushed considerably. "Just that... um... I like the idea that we'll be together for that... phase. The idea that we'll reach that point together."

My brow furrowed as I watched her react to me. "You do?"

She nodded and bit her lip, "Yea... I'm just sorry that I said it out loud. Because god, you look like your about to have a heart attack. I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have said anything."

I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her forehead. "Don't ever apologize for telling me something like that. Bella, I want that shit with you... all of it. I just... I just have no idea how to go about it. So if anyone should be sorry it's me."

She laughed softly, trying to lighten the mood. "I'm pretty sure we know how to make a baby Edward."

I dropped her face and moved back to the comfort of her shoulder. "That's not what I meant."

"What did you mean then? What else do you want with me?"

Love. Marriage. Sex. Babies. A house in the suburbs. "Everything."

"Everything is a lot. Can you be a bit more specific?"

I shook my head against her shoulder. "No. Because that's what I want. Everything."

"So you want to marry me, have my children, cheat on me with my brother, divorce me, and then try and reunite with me decades later on a talk show?"

"Wait, what? I was with you until the cheat on you with your brother thing?"

Her breath hitched, "You were?"

I rolled my eyes at her. "What did you think I was talking about? I mean, besides the fact that it's physically impossible for me to have your children..."

She laughed nervously, "Well, who knows. By the time we're at that point, it may be scientifically possible. Didn't you ever see Junior? If the Governator of California can have a baby I'm sure you can pop one out..." She winked at me and started patting my stomach. This would be fun.

"Would you want me to?"

"I dunno... I mean if its our baby, I guessI wouldn't mind." She smiled warmly at me, "But you have to totally be on top of feeding my cravings, got it? If I'm going to get knocked up, I'm going to get really really fat and enjoy every minute of it."

I smiled at her and nodded, "I got it. It'll be nice to see you... like that." I couldn't believe we were talking about Bella having my child. And I couldn't believe how much I wanted that.

She laughed and rolled her eyes, "Right Edward. You can't waitto see me barefoot and pregnant and moody and as big as a basketball court. I'm sure."

My hand dropped automatically to her stomach and I watched my fingers splayed over her now flat skin, trying to picture her with a bump. "I want that." I whispered, not taking my eyes off of her stomach and my hand. "I want that with you."

Her hand came over mine over her stomach, "Me too Edward. I want that with you too."

I laced my fingers with hers and looked up at her slowly. "You do?"

She smiled at me, "Of course Edward. I love you, why wouldn't I?" She stiffened immediately and looked down.

My heart literally fucking stopped when I heard the words come out of her mouth. I curled my fingers under her chin and lifted her face so that she would look at me. "What did you say?"

"I love you Edward." She breathed.

I smiled and pulled her into me, so that her forehead was against mine. "I love you, too Bella. My Bella."

She smiled warily, "You do?"

"I do."

She laughed softly and kissed my lips. "I do too."

I laughed back at her and nipped playfully at the tip of her nose. "You do too, what?" I wanted to hear her say it again. I never wanted her to not say it to me. I wanted to hear it in as many languages and as many times as I possibly could. It was that fucking awesome.

"I love you Edward. Only you, always you." She said with a kiss to the side of my mouth.

I kissed her back hard, holding her tight to my chest. I didn't realize how much I wanted this and wanted to hear her say it until she did. I need this and I need her. I loved her. I couldn't let her go. I pushed her naked body tighter into my chest, trying to make it easier to not tell Bella the truth. I wanted to be with her-- I needed to. She couldn't know... she couldn't find out. She'd leave me. I knew she would. She deserved better than this. She deserved better than me. I pulled away breathlessly, keeping my forehead to hers. "Baby, you remember last night in the elevator? When you asked me what was wrong?"

"Mhm." She whispered, running her hands over my sides.

"That was it. That was the moment I realized I loved you. And I didn't know what to do because I didn't want to freak you out. But I do, Bella. I love you so much."

"But you looked so sad...?"

"Cause I didn't know what to do. What if you didn't love me? What if you told me to leave? I didn't... I didn't want to risk losing you."

"Edward, I'm pretty sure I realized I was in love with you the moment I saw you at JFK. It was confirmed at dinner... so you could have said it over and over again last night and my response would have been the same each time: I love you too." She cupped my jaw with one had before she continued. "And Edward, I won't ever tell you to leave. I love you, you're mine and I'm yours. There's nothing that will change that, okay?"

I smiled softly at her and kissed her one more time. "I love you too. But you were mine even before I loved you... I think you might always have been mine. I just didn't know it."

She snuggled against me, "And how's that?"

"You're meant to be mine, love. Can't you feel it?" So what the hell was I doing with a fiancée I didn't love? Why the fuck was I hurting Bella like this? WHY!?

"I've always felt it Edward. Since that first night at the restaurant, I think. I just didn't know... I didn't know what that was."

I kissed her forehead again. "Well, at least now we do right? I love you. I love you. I love you."

She giggled and tilted her head up, nibbling on my lower lip then pulling away slowly. "I love you."

I kissed her one last time before pulling away and smiling down at her. "The library, right?"

She shook her head, "No. I changed my mind. Plus it's Sunday, and we have the Sunday rule to abide by, remember?"

I kissed her forehead. I had no fucking clue what she was talking about. "Of course, love."

She laughed, looking at me pointedly and smirking. "Oh really, then what is it?"

Shit. "Uh..." I copped out and kissed her instead. Maybe... maybe I could make her forget whatever she was talking about.

She laughed under my lips, "Close." She pulled away and started to kiss a trail down my neck. I tilted my head back at the sensation of her full lips moving over my skin. "Sunday rule: every Sunday," She bit the crook of my neck for emphasis, "to be spent in bed, under the covers, naked." I moaned and she kissed her way back to my lips. "Is that a problem, love?"

I smiled and shook my head. "Nope. No problem."

She sighed, and rolled onto her back, "Though we may have to temporarily break it to run and get a couple more boxes of condoms..."

"Fuck, I forgot about that." I snuggled closer to her, "But let's stay here for a little bit. I wanna hold you."

she turned back to me and wrapped her arms around me, "Definitely." She sighed and buried her face in my chest. "Edward?"

"What's up, baby?"

She kissed my chest, "I love you... so much."

I smiled to myself and kissed the top of her head. "I love you too, Baby. I love you, too."

BPOV

It was kind of disgusting how happy I was. And waking up to Edward kissing along the side of my neck did nothing to lessen my mood. "Mmm.." I murmured as my body slowly woke up and my eyes fluttered open. His lips moved along my jaw and up my cheek to my my temple. "Morning love." He whispered as he nuzzled my hair with his nose. "Morning," I replied yawning lazily. He laughed and rolled onto his back, pulling me with him.

"This is a pretty nice hotel. Do you think they have a personal shopper that could run and buy condoms for us, so we wouldn't have to get dressed?" I asked as I rested my chin on his chest and looked up at him.

He leaned away from me, reaching for the phone on the nightstand. "We could call and find out..."

I laughed and nodded. "Do it!"

He glanced at me playfully, holding the receiving in his hand. "Baby, what the fuck does it look like I'm doing?"

I sat up a little, locking my elbow and tilting my head to the side as I looked down at him, smirking. His mouth gaped open a little and his hand moved to rub along the side of my body as the other held the receiver. "Well?"

He mouthed 'front desk' before his voice cracked a little and he spoke. "Yeah, hi... I'm a guest in your hotel and I was wondering if you had a... um... errand running service? What do we need? Oh, umm... condoms actually." His cheeks flashed a shade of red, slowly fading into a soft pink as he ran a hand through his hair. "Oh. Oh. right I understand. Yes. Completely. No. No. Thank you." He twisted his torso around to hang up the phone and quickly reached back for me. "He said no."

I pouted and sat up, wrapping the bed sheet around my upper body. "Guess we're leaving the fort then?"

"I guess. Unless you want it to be a celibate sunday."He said, sighing and pressing his lips to mine.

My face scrunched up and I shook my head. "That's your worst idea ever Edward." My face fell back into a normal expression as a light bulb went off and I smirked. "Unless we turned it into a game..."

His eyebrows shot up in curiosity. "What kind of game?"

"Who can hold out longer without touching the other." I said, biting my lip and grinning down at him.

"I'm gonna lose."He lamented with a laugh.

I smirked and shrugged, scooting out of bed and dropping the sheet, turning to look over my shoulder. "No game then?"

He sat up, propping his body up with his elbows and sighing. "We could play. I'm just telling you that I'll lose." There was a beat of silence before he looked up at me through his eyelashes. "Am I really that unappealing to you?"

I turned around and crawled back on the bed, my lips hovering milimeters from his, but refraining from actually touching them. "Baby," I breathed, "you are the sexiest man I've ever see in my life and I love when you pound into me. But just think of how much better I'm going to feel around you if you hold out and let some of that tension build..." I whispered against his lips.

"Okay." He agreed, falling back against the pillows and looking up at the ceiling.

I laughed and moved off the bed once again. "It's just an idea. We don't have to play it. But if we're not, then you better run to the store because I'm going to expect you pounding into me in the shower in about 10 minutes."

His breath hitched and he eyed me mischievously. "Baby, there's still one left in your bag."

"Really?" I asked furrowing my brows and trying to think back to earlier last night. There was the bathroom... the hall table... the... there was no cab! There HAD to be one in my purse! I tried to hide my excitement as I looked at him pointedly, hands on my hips. "Does that mean you don't want to play the game then?"

He smirked shaking his head. "It means I get to fuck you one more time before it starts."

I shook my head, wagging my finger at him. "Nuh-uh. Game starts effective now; only nowyou get to know that you're a few steps away from being able to fuck me instead of an entire trek to the store."

His bottom lip jutted out and he looked like a little boy who was just denied a trip inside the toy store. "Baby..."

My eyes went wide and I matched his pout, shrugging. "I'm going to go shower the smell of your sex off me. Unless you want to join and leave your mark in me again?" I knew I was asking for something that we couldn't do. But god I missed the way it felt when he exploded in me. The possessive look in his eyes, the way it felt when he filled me. God I needed to get on the pill the minute we got back to Washington. I turned on the balls of my feet and walked towards the bathroom; my hips swaying exaggeratedly as I moved.

EPOV

I couldn't believe that she was doing this to me. Two could play at that game. I sniffed a little and looked at her, making my eyes wide. "Baby..."

She turned, running a hand through her hair. "Hm?"

I just looked at her, trying to look as sad and cute and lovable as I could.

"Baby?" She said, her plump lips pulled into a pout.

She would not win. I sniffled again and ran my hand through my hair again, and I knew it was sticking up the way she like when she started shifting her weight on her feet.

"I love you Edward." She turned and walked into the bathroom, leaving the door slightly ajar.

I dropped back down onto the bed and listened as the water turned on in the bathroom. She thought she had me. She was in there smirking because she thought I was going to go in there and plow her. A sly smile spread across my face and I knew instantly that I had a plan. I got up and dressed quickly, grabbing my wallet and cell phone before jotting Bella a quick note.

You see, I can't lose if I'm not there.

BPOV

I got out of the shower, thoroughly disappointed that my plan of attack hadn't worked. "Edward?" I called when I didn't see his body in the bed. I peeked around the living room but there was no sign of him. My heart started thumping wildly. Had I crossed a line? Was I not allowed to use that as a joking ploy? Fuck.

And that's when I spotted it, a tiny index card sized note scribbled on with his chicken scratch handwriting. "Out. Be back soon. - E"

Fan fucking tastic. Well, fuck that. If he decided he didn't want to be around me, two could play at that game. I threw on a pair of sweats, grabbed my cell, keycard and ipod and hustled down to the lobby. I had to get rid of this sexual enegry somehow.

Running seemed about the only option I had.

EPOV

Lunch, four hours and an exorbanant amount of money later, I got back to the suite pretty fucking proud of myself. I hadn't caved once. But then I saw Bella, standing in the living room, her arms folded across her chest in my boxers and tee shirt. I smiled instantly.

"Hey, Baby."

She ran to me and jumped into my arms, securing herself tightly to me. "Why the fuckdid you agree to my dumb idea of playing that stupid game?" She asked, pushing her face into the crook of my neck.

I laughed and held her tightly to me, trying to not beat her up with the bag in my hand. "Because you seemed like you wanted to."

"Edward, when are you going to realize I make bad choices when it comes to us? I'm like.. the bad suggestion giver in this relationship. You need to stop me sometimes, especially when I suggest shit like you not touching me for as long as you can."

I kissed her forehead and walked us over to the couch, setting her down then moving beside her. "Don't you want to see what I bought you?"

She eyed the bright orange box warily. "Um... yes?"

I nodded to the box. "So open it."

She opened the box and gasped, her eyes wide. "Edward... I--I... I can't accept this. It's way way way too much..." She stared up at me in disbelief.

I shook my head and leaned back on the arm of the couch. "Yes you can. It's fine. I want you to have it."

She shook her head adamantly, "No Edward, we have to take this back. It's way too much. I can't accept this."

"Baby, do you love it?"

"That doesn't matter." She looked down at the bag (which was according to Alice, something that every girl had to have) and shook her head. "Edward, it's too much."

I pouted at her. "Why?"

"Edward, it's Hermes. People just don't go around giving each other Hermes bags!"

I furrowed my brow and looked from the red leather bag that she was so obviously in love with back you her. "But you love it. And I'm giving it to you."

"Edward," She sighed, "I do love it. But, I can't accept it. You can understand why right?"

I shook my head. "No."

She put the box down on the ground and cuddled into my lap. "Baby. You can't go around dropping thousands on a purse for me. That's just... not okay."

Yeah, I still didn't get it. "Well, technically, I didn't do it alone. If that makes you feel better."

She crinkled her forehead and looked up at me. "What? Who went with you?"

"No one went with me. But, Baby this bag is a... a..."

"Birkin." She dead panned.

"Uh, yeah, and I guess there's like an--"

"Thirty-six month wait, get to the point."

I raised an eyebrow and kissed her forehead. "Just say thank you to Alice when you see her. For making the down payment."

Her eyes went wide again, and I groaned internally. Couldn't she just say thank you? "Edward! I definitelycan't accept this. She what? Thinks that you bought it as a gift for your assistant?"

I avoided her gaze like the plague. "She may or may not know something about you and me that I definitely did not anticipate."

"What does she know?"

"Uh... some stuff."

"Edward..."

I played with the hem of her tee shirt. "Yeah, Baby?"

"What does she know, and howdoes she know?"

"She may or may not have guessed about the uh... nature of our relationship." That works, right?

"And you responded to her 'guessing' with what exactly?"

I looked at her, confused. "what?"

"Did you deny it?" She looked down sadly, "Because of Tanya I mean."

I laughed and cupped her face with my hands. "Baby, do you think she would have given up her bag if I had? Well wait, you only met her once. So trust me, she wouldn't have, had I not confirmed what she... uh, believed."

"Edward, this was hers? Why did she--"

"Because I love you. And you make me happy; happier than I've been since I met her, she said." I ran my thumbs across her cheek bones, smiling at this silly girl I was completely in love with.

She blushed hard, and brushed her lips against mine. "I love you too Edward, but I still can't take her purse."

I leaned in and kissed her fully. "Love, it's yours. I promise. You didn't even look inside yet."

Her eye brows shot up and she scrambled for the bag, then relaxed when she pulled out the condoms. "These I'll accept. The bag? Still no."

I pouted. "If you don't take it... uh... we're still playing the game."

She pouted back at me and stood, "Edward I won't accept a thousands of dollar bag that was supposed to be Alice's on the threat that if I don't, you won't touch me. That's not fair."

I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back down to me, smashing my lips to hers. It had been too long. I couldn't go this long without kissing her. It just couldn't be healthy. She tried to pull away, so I cupped the back of her head with one hand and soon enough, she was in my lap. I pulled away slowly, tracing the line of her nose with the tip of my own and breathing heavily. "Now?"

She sighed and shook her head. "Edward, it's still too much. I feel... weird accepting it."

I leaned in again and kissed her slowly, letting my lips move against hers, then swiping my tongue against them. She opened her mouth to me hesitantly, but finally let me in. Once again, I pulled away slowly, this time placing soft kisses on her eyelids and cheeks. I missed her so fucking much. "And now?"

She sighed and ran her hand slowly down my chest. It reminded me of Tanya, and that was the last thing I needed right then. "Can we forget about the bag for a few minutes? It's been too long. I need you."

I leaned over and kissed her harder, pushing her back onto the sofa. "You got me, baby. Always. You could have called, you know."

"Yeah but I figured that you were either upset with me, or just wanted some space. I figured you'd come home when you were ready."

I laughed and pulled off her shorts. "Baby, even if I had been upset you could've called." I leaned in, kissing her softly and bracing my weight on my forearms beside her head. "I love you, Bella. I'll always come home for you, okay?"

She nodded and kissed me. "I love you too. Always."

I kissed her cheeks and she worked my pants off enough to grab my hard on. She reached around me to the box and grabbed a condom, rolling it on carefully. She laid back again, running her hands over my shoulders and looking up at me. "You're mine, Bella. Always mine."

She was about to speak when I pushed into her. She let out a groan, and arched her back into me while I tired to keep it together. Every fucking time I was in Bella felt like the first. I needed to be inside her... I wanted to be there. As I began to move in and out of her, I realized that there wasn't anyone who made me feel the way she did. I never wanted to let her go. I leaned down and latched onto her nipple through the thin fabric of the tee shirt and her hands threaded to my hair as she began to gasp. "Fuck... Edward..." She whispered.

I kept on going, harder and faster until I felt her walls start to tremble around my cock. I needed her to cum. "Shit, baby..." I whispered, blowing cool air on her wet nipple. "Baby... you're gonna cum... I can feel it. Do you think you can do that for me, Baby? Can you cum all over my cock? Please, Baby, I need to watch you cum."

"FUCKING SHIT EDWARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" She wailed, arching off the sofa and into me, holding me tight to her body as I thrust once... twice more before cumming into the condom. I eased my self out of her, but kept her close, not wanting her to be apart from me for any amount of time. I loved her; I really did.

I kissed her forehead, as she began to loosen her grip on my hair. "I love you, Baby." I whispered, not wanting to bother my angel.

"I love you," she replied, running her hands over my face before cupping it gently.

I sat up, bringing her with me and stood to carry her into the bedroom where we both collapsed on the bed. She pulled off her shirt and I quickly got rid of my clothes so that we could curl up into each other-- the way it was supposed to be. I wrapped my arms and legs around her like a vice. I wasn't letting her go unless it was absolutely necessary. I nuzzled my face into her hair, and she tucked her head under my chin. I wanted this to be it. I didn't want to ever have to leave here, but in the back of my mind I knew it had to come to an end, both when I went back to Seattle and when she found out... everything. She wouldn't want me then... she'd be disgusted.

"Baby, I love you."

She hummed into my skin and pressed a kiss into my skin. "I love you."

"So you'll take the bag?"

She laughed, "No Edward, but I'll take you."

I snuggled closer to her, running my fingers through the ends of her hair. "Baby, you have me. You had me before the bag. I think you should take it. If I have to bring it home to Alice... well, let's just say our relationship will suddenly be very platonic."

She nibbled on my neck, "I'd take you, even if she castrated you. You do a-mazing things with your mouth."

I closed my eyes and leaned into her touch. "No babies, then."

"That's okay, we could adopt. No stretchmarks."

"Take the bag."

"No."

"Please?"

"Edward it's too much."

"It's not enough."

She pulled away to look at me. "Edward, you're all I need. I don't need anything else. Just you."

"Well, that's lovely." I kissed her nose then pulled away again. "You're all I need, too. But the thing is, I need you to have that. Because it's a gift." I could guilt her into it. I'd been around Alice for the last five years. I knew I could.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. "You do not needme to have it."

I pouted à la Alice, and widened my eyes as much as I could. "But you let everyone else get you things. And you bought my clothes the other day. This makes us even."
"You flew out here - for me, without clothes. Me buying you clothes was a partial repayment of I'm sure the astronomical cost of your flight. Technically I still haven't paid you back for it all and then you buy me this... Edward. It's too much. Way too much."

I leaned in and kissed her softly again, "Like I said, love, It won't ever be enough. Nothing will ever match the things you've given me."

"And what have I given you that you haven't given me in return?" She whispered against my lips.

I pulled away and smiled at her. "Complete and utter happiness."

"You gave me that too, sorry" She smiled.

"I know. It's sitting in the living room, feeling lonely."

"No, you gave it to me the minute you agreed to dinner with me at the restaurant the first night we met."

I narrowed my eyes. "Take the bag."

"No."

"Please? For me?"

Bella sighed, looking down. "Edward, I feel awkward taking it. It's too much. I can't accept a gift like that."

"I don't understand." I said, loosening my grip on her. Maybe I had misjudged the situation? Maybe she loved me here and now, but once we left that was it. "I'm sorry. You're right. I'll take it back."
She pulled herself back into me, "Edward, just because I can't accept it doesn't mean I love you any less. What if you keep the bag and you can put my candygram in it for valentine's day on like... our 10th anniversary or something?"

I sighed and kissed her forehead, pulling away again and standing up, grabbing my boxers. "Baby, it's fine. You're right. It was too much. I'll take it back."

I tugged my shorts the rest of the way on and went back into the living room to pack the thing back up. What a mess I'd made, huh?

I heard her follow me, "Edward why is this a big deal?"

I didn't look up at her as I put the thing back in its little sleeve thing, "It's not. Really, love."

"It is for some reason. Just tell me why. Please?"

I shrugged and put it back into the box, replacing the lid carefully. "It's not a big deal." I mumbled. "I just wanted to give you something nice. I wanted you to have something from me."

She came over to me and cupped my jaw with her hand, "Baby, I have something from you."

"No you don't. I've never gotten you anything."

She smiled and grabbed my tee shirt before scampering into the bedroom. I could hear her going through her suitcase. She came back out, smiling and carrying my jacket from the night we met. Fuck, I thought I lost it. "You left this at my place after that first night. I haven't had the strength to give it back. When we stopped talking.. I'd fall asleep wrapped up in it." She blushed as she spoke.

I traced my fingers over the lid of the now closed box and looked up at her. I didn't want to think of being without her anymore. I didn't ever want to be without her. Not ever. I couldn't do it. I stood up and kissed her slowly, then pushed my forehead to her shoulder. "I love you, you know that?"

She pressed her lips to my temple firmly, "Does that mean you'll let me keep your jacket?"

I sighed and kissed her shoulder, turning back to the box and putting it in its bag. "Of course, love. You can have whatever you want."

"Kay, then I know without a doubt in my mind four things I want." She said, plopping down on the couch.

"What's that?" I asked, scratching my head absentmindedly and looking around for my shirt.

"Well one, this jacket."

"Two?" I called, moving into the bedroom and grabbing my spare shirt, since I'd found the other draped over Bella.

"You."

"You've already got me." I yelled, pulling on my jeans. "Three?"

She got up and followed me into the bedroom, leaning against the door frame. "A family with you."

I stood in front of her, my brow furrowed. "This isn't going where I thought it would. Four?"

Her voice dropped, "The first three, but unconditionally and forever."

I stopped and looked at her. She already had those things; they'd already been discussed. I leaned in, wrapping my arms around her and kissing her forehead. "You have them. You'll always have them." I murmured into her skin.

"Then a fifth thing?" She whispered. "That Birkin with a candy gram for our 10th anniversary."

I sighed and kissed her forehead again then pulled away. "I'll get you something else. You said you didn't want it, so I'll take it back. You don't have to say that just to make me happy. You make me happy, love."

"No, I never said I didn't want it. I said I couldn't accept it. Edward, in the span of less than two months I've met and fallen in love with the man that I want to spend the rest of my life with. And now he's trying to give me a ridiculously expensive, beautiful bag. Edward, please. I love it and truly appreciate the gesture but please can't we save it, hold onto it for a while?"

I moved past her and into the living room, picking up the bag and looking at her. I couldn't take it home. She had to realize that I couldn't take it home. "Baby, it's fine. If you really want another, then I'll get you another. But I"ll bring this one back." I shrugged and reached for my key. "It's fine, love."

"Why can't we keep it?"

"I can't take it back with me."

"Oh. Oh.... right." she hung her head, my heart broke. "Right. I didn't even think..." she turned and shuffled back into the bedroom, "Take it back Edward."

I sighed, and tossed my head back. I just couldn't win today. There wasn't anything that I could say or do that would be right. I dropped the bag and followed her into the bedroom. "Baby, I'm sorry... But I--"

"No it's fine. You're going back to Tanya, of course you can't take it back with you. I get it." She changed out of my shirt and into her stuff, then looked at me with cold eyes. "I'll see you when you get back, yea?"

"Baby, stop. I'm sorry. I just... fuck... just please don't do this to me right now, okay?"

"I'm not doing anything Edward. I changed because I need to not be surrounded by you right now and thinking that you're going back to Tanya soon and that this whole thing is ending. I just... I need to not think about that right now. So go do whatever you need to do to prep for that, okay?" She crawled under the covers and curled herself into a ball.

"Bella, listen." I was getting mad now because she wasn't thinking beyond her own bubble. She couldn't see the broader picture and why this was all necessary. "Nothing is ending, but I do have to go back and, uh I don't know: break up with her. Minor detail, I know. And then I actually have to get our shit and tie up loose ends. I'm sorry if that bothers you, but I can't think of it happening any other way." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair. She still hadn't moved, or even acknowledged that I'd spoken. I realized that this was my out. This was the easy way for me to get around telling Bella the truth and having her leave me. "But honestly, if this is what you want, then so be it. You don't want me around? Okay, fine. I'll go home and take care of shit. Call me when you're ready to see me again."

I turned on my heel and walked out, not really believing that I had let it go that far. All I wanted to do was buy her something; something nice that she could have forever. And what happens? She tells me to leave. I just couldn't catch a break.