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ISOBELLE

Delphine falls into my lap, clutching a doll by the hair and grinning at me. She has an infectious smile, and it almost makes me guilty for not always wanting to have to worry about her. She looks just like me, except she has Simon's blond hair, but it falls in tight curls. It still perplexes me to think that I created her. Delphine is mine. And I love her.

"Mummy," Delphine says with a small laugh. "Stop tickling me!"

"I'm sorry, Delphine, but with cheeks likes yours, I've got no choice," I explain. At last for a calm moment, I can pretend things are always like this, and I'm actually able to spend quality time with my daughter. It almost makes me forget she isn't Simon's only child, that he has a stupid son out there somewhere with his first wife.

"What's wrong, Mummy?" Delphine asks endearingly, her expression turning serious. She reaches for the other dolls on her bed.

I shake my head quickly to let her know everything's all right. "Nothing, I'm fine," I promise her. "Look at this messy room, I think the house-elves need to clean it up, don't you?"

Delphine ignores me. "Are you sick, Mummy?" She asks, moving to sit opposite me on her bed. She crosses her ankles like a perfect little girl.

"No, love." In reality, I'm not sure what's wrong with me, but it's most likely the stress of being married to Simon breaking me down even more than I believed humanely possible. After Scorpius' visit yesterday, I've realized just how alone I am.

"Are you sad?"

"A little."

"Why, Mummy?"

I sigh. This is nothing for Delphine to have to worry about, nor should she even be aware of it. She's only a child. She shouldn't have to worry about me. "Let's play dolls."

"I'm sad," Delphine offers, poking out her lower lip.

I look up at her, surprised that she would ever admit anything like that. "Why are you sad, Delphine?" I question, looking at my daughter seriously.

"You and Daddy always fighting," Delphine says. She doesn't look at me.

"We are not," I assure Delphine. "Let's not discuss this."

Delphine nods her head in protest and slightly tugs the green ribbon in her hair. "This morning in breakfast you said a mean thing at Daddy and he yelled. Stuff got broken," she recounts.

"That was nothing." I don't even remember what Simon and I argued over, but I regret Delphine had to witness it, and that Simon doesn't possess the maturity to not cause a scene in front of his own child. Things would be better off without him.

Delphine purses her lips. "Why's Daddy's always angry?" she questions. It's because she isn't a boy.

"He has a lot of things to deal with at work," I lie. "He has a lot of stress."

Delphine doesn't respond, and I know she doesn't understand. I don't, either. "Kay, Mummy," she says quietly.

I don't want Delphine to think of this any longer. "Are you excited to see your grandparents tonight? And your aunts and uncles?" I ask, changing the subject.

"Yes!" Delphine grins brightly. She loves going to see my parents, since they absolutely adore her. I don't mind her going; I just hate being reminded that they'll never think anything I do for Delphine is good enough. "Can I wear my new robes?"

"Of course, you can." Delphine absolutely loves dressing up and getting new clothes. She takes her doll and goes to play at her doll house. It's nearly taller than her. "Did you do well in your lessons today?"

Delphine nods. "I did all my spelling, and reading, and maths," she informs me, her voice echoing from the other side of her dollhouse.

"I'm very proud of you." I am happy with how brilliant Delphine is, and how she enjoys learning. I just don't feel it's enough, though. "Delphine?"

"Yes, Mummy?" I still can't see her face.

"I need you to look at me."

Delphine comes around the other side of the dollhouse to look at me. I take a deep breath. "You don't want to attend school at home for the next seven years, do you? Wouldn't you enjoy it better if you went to school with children your age and made more friends?" I ask. "You wouldn't have to leave until you were perhaps six or seven, but I want you to think on it."

I never wanted Delphine to be sent away, but now I think it's better for her. She shouldn't have to be at home to watch all this tension between Simon and me. It isn't fair to her, and I'd rather she didn't grow to hate me because of it.

Delphine shrugs. "You're my friend, Mummy."

I smile, even though I know that Delphine needs more than me. I'm still glad she loves me. "I mean friends your age, dear. Friends at school."

"Do I see you and Daddy still?" Delphine asks, frowning slightly.

I nod. "Of course, you will. But, not every day like you're used to."

"Why not?"

"You'll be going to a school like Hogwarts, where it's far away. I can't take you home and bring you back every day," I explain, trying to hold back tears. I don't want to part with Delphine, and I don't want her to think I'm anxious to be rid of her, but it's best for her that she leaves as soon as she can.

Delphine doesn't say anything else. She returns to concerning herself with her dolls. "Delphine-"

"I want to play in the garden, Mummy," Delphine says, putting her dolls away. Her expression is blank, and she isn't smiling anymore.

"That's fine, Darling."

Delphine's door bursts open so quickly it hits the wall and comes back slightly. Delphine looks up. Shocked, I turn around. Simon is standing in the doorway, holding a letter of some sort.

"Wife," Simon says calmly, looking dead at me. "We need to have a discussion."

I purse my lips, glancing at Delphine, at the alert expression on her face. "You can go outside, love. Just make sure the house-elves know where you are. I'll be out very soon," I promise her. Delphine doesn't look convinced. "You don't have to worry."

Delphine stands slowly, passing Simon on the way out. He doesn't greet her, seeming too preoccupied with me. When Delphine rounds the corner, her comes into her room and shuts the door behind him. "What was that about?" He demands, his eyebrows furrowed.

"You scared her this morning at breakfast," I answer in a low voice. "Yelling at me. Breaking plates."

Simon looks as if this is the biggest load of bullshit anyone could have fed him. "What did you tell her?" He questions, narrowing his eyes at me.

"I said nothing." Even though I very easily could, I haven't once thought to turn Delphine against Simon. I gesture to the letter in his hand. "What is it?"

"Did you write this?" Simon questions, thrusting the letter in my hand. It doesn't take me more than a second to realize it is my letter. I wrote it to Jane over a week ago.

"Yes," I answer. "How do you have it?"

Simon rolls his eyes as if that's beside the point. "Eric sent it to me. He found it in Jane's things." I'm not stupid enough to ask what Eric was doing looking about in Jane's things, I'm just glad Simon is too disinterested in me to do the same.

"Oh."

Simon snatches the letter back from me. "Is it true?" He demands, searching my face for an answer.

"Is what true?"

"Is it true that 'for years you've absolutely been overwhelmed with feelings of fear and regret'?" Simon questions, reading directly from the letter, and then looking to me for a response.

Suddenly, my body feels cold. How can I lie? I have felt this way, but I've tried to hide it. But now here's the truth, in black and white.

I nod dumbly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Simon's voice has a sharp edge to it. "What do you fear and regret?"

I shake my head. "That I can't give you a son," I lie slowly. Simon seems to believe this quite easily.

"You know how much depends on this," he reminds me. "How desperately we need a son." I nod distractedly from my place on Delphine's bed. I wish I could li down and sleep, and never wake again.

"Yes, I know," I say. "Because of Catherine."

Simon shakes his head, pressing his lips into a firm line. "Not just because of Catherine," he tells me in a tone that sounds rather angry. "You and I need a son regardless. Don't worry yourself with her. She's irrelevant."

"How can I not?" I question, shaking my head. "How can I not worry that Delphine isn't going to get what she deserves because you have some son running about with your first wife? How can I not think about that?"

"Just think that all of it will be irrelevant if you give me my son," Simon reminds me.

"I know, I'm sorry," I apologize, just so Simon will quit patronizing me.

Simon moves closer to me, folding the letter and shoving it in his robes pocket. He removes something else. My wedding ring. "One of the house-elves brought this to me this morning, since you were nowhere to be found. Is something wrong?" He questions, narrowing his eyes at me slightly.

Everything is wrong. I wish I wasn't married to Simon, and I hate him for being such a monster. "No," I say stiffly.

Simon shrugs and checks his watch. "What time are we visiting your parents?" He questions.

"Six," I answer. Simon doesn't say anything for a while, so I get up and go over to Delphine's window. I draw back the silken pink curtains so that I can see her in the garden. She's lying on the bench with a large picture book, stretched out on her stomach. It pains me to see how bored and lonely Delphine always seems. I want to go outside with her.

I feel Simon's arms wrap around my waist. It makes me cringe in disgust. I hate it when Simon touches me, and I wish he never would again. "Isn't she so beautiful?" He asks quietly, and for a second, he almost tricks me into thinking he cares for Delphine.

I nod.

"Just like her mother," Simon continues. Since he can't see me, I roll my eyes. Simon's next words take me by surprise. "I know that you aren't happy, Isobelle."

"What would make you say that?" I ask, trying to not sound like I have a reason to be nervous.

"I can tell by your attitude. You don't even try to speak to me anymore, you're distant. I know when you're upset. Your face shows it."

I don't respond. I'm well aware that it wouldn't go well no matter what I said. Even if I admitted to being upset, it would do nothing to change Simon's behavior. Delphine closes her book and gets up to go inside, and then I don't see her anymore.

Simon places a cold kiss on my neck. "Don't ever think of leaving me, Isobelle," he whispers quietly. "If you'd like to see your daughter again."

I'm taken aback by Simon's words. I turn around and look at him, dumbfounded. "What did you say?"

"If you so much as try to leave me, then Delphine is mine, and you will never see her again. Both you and I know very well the law would work in my favor," Simon continues in a low drawl, sounding quite proud of himself.

Of course it would. Ever since I've first met him, Simon's been promoted numerous times. I can say what I'd like about his character, but he's one of the best lawyers in the Ministry. I would be powerless.

"Why would you say that?" I ask.

"I don't want you to get any ideas," Simon says simply. "If you're truly unhappy, then you'll have to endure, for the love of your daughter."

I don't know what to say. How could Simon threaten to take Delphine away from me, simply because I hate how cruel he is to me? Because he can.

"Are you threatening me?" I question, beside myself with anger. "How could you possibly think to use our daughter against me?"

"It isn't a threat. It's a warning," Simon informs me coldly.

They're exactly the same thing. "You can't take my daughter away from me! No matter what!" I protest.

Simon raises an eyebrow. "Use a normal tone of voice when you're addressing me," he orders. "I can do whatever I please. Delphine is my daughter. This is my family, and I won't allow you to ruin it."

I shake my head at Simon. "She's my daughter too! You didn't give birth to her! You don't give her any attention! How can you speak about me ruining this family when you spend your time with any willing woman? You're disgusting to-"

I let out a strangled cry as Simon slaps me hard across the face. Usually I can tell when it's coming, but this time, I've been completely blindsided. I can't look at him.

He grabs my shoulder, close to my neck. His eyes are dark, and his expression is unreadable. "If anyone is disgusting, it's you. Disgust can't even begin to describe it. You aren't a proper mother, or wife, and you can't even carry a child. You disgust me," Simon drawls. "Say something to me like that again, and I'll beat you within a centimeter of your damned life."

"Simon…" I plead breathlessly. "Calm down..."

"Don't tell me what to do!" Simon snaps harshly. "This is what you do! You anger me, and then you try to placate me! Perhaps you should just keep your damned mouth shut!" Simon shakes my hand off. I feel like he's choking me.

"I'm… I'm sorry."

Simon shakes his head. "You aren't-"

"Mummy?" Delphine asks in a small voice, standing in the doorway. Her lower lip trembles. Simon glances over his shoulder with a look of disgust and lets me go. I feel my back against the wall again.

"Delphine, not now!" he yells. "I'm speaking to your mother!"

"Mummy…" Delphine says again. I can tell she's frightened. I hurry over to her, picking her up and letting her know I'm all right.

"Mummy's fine," I say quietly, kissing her cheek and brushing Delphine's hair out of her face. "I'm all right."

"You're crying, Mummy," Delphine says quietly, a troubled look on her little face.

I shake my head. "I'm fine. Daddy and I were just having a conversation… Everything is all right, Darling."

"No," Delphine protests in a whisper. She doesn't say anything else, but she wraps her arms around my shoulders and rests her head on me.

Simon adjusts his robes and brushes past me, bumping into my shoulder and giving me a threatening look to Delphine's back. "Keep in mind what I said."

Nina gives me a questioning look. "Are you coming to see us off tomorrow?" She questions, a look of hope in her eyes.

"I wanna go," Delphine says, a look of pleading already forming on her face. She still seems uncomfortable from earlier. I can tell by the way she avoids looking at the rest of us too much, and she speaks in a small voice. I feel horrible that Delphine doesn't understand, but she shouldn't have to. Rose smiles at her, and then gives me a scathing glance as if she'd rather I stayed at home. "Mummy, can we? Please?"

I nod quickly, not wanting to seem distant in front of my family. Really, I can't stop thinking of Simon's ultimatum, and him hitting me earlier. My neck is rather sore, and it took quite a charm to cover the bruise it left. "Of course, we'll go, Delphine," I assure her. "I wouldn't miss it for the world."

Simon says nothing, although I'm not stupid enough to think he would come. They're my siblings, not his.

Mum gives me a concerned look. "Isobelle, are you feeling all right? You look a little unwell."

"I asked her the other day," Scorpius says, not looking at me. He doesn't make any other comments regarding anything we've discussed. I'm grateful.

"As did I," Simon says. No, he didn't. He couldn't care less how I feel.

"Are you sick again?" Mum asks, fawning over me like I'm Delphine's age. I'm positive it's just stress. "Do you feel well?"

"Mummy's sick," Delphine informs Mum in my place. "And sad." She looks down and doesn't say anything else when Simon gives her a look.

Scorpius and I make eye contact. He looks away. Mum seems a little bothered too.

Simon's hand rests on the inside of my thigh for a brief second, his thumb massaging my leg. I don't like it. "Then we'll have to take care that you're happier, won't we?" He kisses the side of my head. Scorpius coughs and Rose narrows her eyes at him. She looks different, as if she's actually taken care to give some attention to her appearance and put on some makeup. She looks nice.

Dad forces a smile. He's completely oblivious. "How is work, Simon?" For the first time tonight, Simon seems interested in the conversation.

"It's going wonderfully, but I spend so much time at the office, I regret not being home enough," he tells my dad. He casts a longing glance in my direction, and I offer him a small smile. I know Simon cheats on me when he's at work. I'm not stupid. That's why he isn't ever at home.

"It's difficult at times to manage work at the Ministry and a family on top of that, but it's certainly doable."

Simon nods. "Indeed it is. But, Isobelle makes it quite easy." Simon frowns and glances at Delphine as she tries to lift and entire piece of food into her mouth with her fork.

"Cut it," Simon says to Delphine. He turns back to Dad.

She frowns. "But I don't have-"

I hand Delphine a knife. "Here, Darling. Be careful."

"Isobelle, no," Mum interrupts. "Don't give her a knife."

I don't know what Mum's getting at. No matter what I do, she has to find fault with it. "Delphine can cut her own food. I'm not going to do it for her," I say.

"Are you serious?" Rose asks, staring into her glass.

"It would make me feel better if you did," Mum says with a distressed look, glancing at Delphine nervous. "But I know by now that you'll-"

"Fine," I say, taking the knife back from Delphine and starting to cut her food for her. "If you want me to baby her, then I will." No matter what I do, I always look like the bad person. I'm simply trying to make Delphine more independent.

"It isn't about that," Dad says, coming to Mum's defense. "I would have never thought to give any of you knives at such a young age."

"Well, I'm not you. Eat, Delphine. Before your food gets cold, please."

"Okay, Mummy."

"You don't need to talk back. Just do it." I'm a little annoyed right now, but it isn't Delphine's fault.

"Sorry, Mummy."

Rose blows air out of her nose, and action which seems to irritate Scorpius greatly.

Scorpius leans back in his chair. "Tomorrow can't come fast enough."

"You'll still see us," Hugo reasons, raising his eyebrows.

"But we'll have separate living quarters and quite honestly, I'll take what I can get," Scorpius says.

"You're so dramatic, Scorpius," Rose complains.

"Me? Dramatic? I'm not the one-"

"That's enough," Mum says sharply, shaking her head. "The two of you go back and forth like children. Now, I want us all to have a nice night together before you go back to school. Is that too much to ask?"

My siblings shake their heads. Delphine shakes her head too, copying Rose.

"Thank you," Mum says, smiling like she's satisfied with herself. "I won't say it again."

Delphine tugs at Simon's sleeve, and he almost spills wine on himself. "Don't ever do that again!" He orders, cursing. I can't help but avert my eyes. "What do you need?"

Mum obviously objects to Simon speaking to Delphine that way, but he doesn't say anything. Nina purses her lips and shares a worried look with Hugo.

"Daddy, I have to use the bathroom," Delphine says so quietly, I have to strain my ears to hear her.

"Go ahead," Simon says dismissively, moving his glass of wine from her reach. "You know where the restroom is."

Delphine pouts, which Simon absolutely hates. "It's dark, Daddy…" she pleads frightfully.

"Delphine, don't pout! I've told you about that. Simon," I say quietly, looking to my husband. "Go ahead and take her. She has to use the bathroom."

"I had no idea," Simon says bitingly under his breath. He glances at me for a long second, then stands. "Come, Delphine," he says boredly. Delphine gets out of her chair and follows Simon. The dining room door shuts.

"Isobelle, I'm not going to tell you how to parent, but the way you and Simon speak to Delphine is a bit unnecessary," Mum says carefully, as if she's trying to spare my feelings.

"You saw what she did," I say slowly, not making eye contact with either of my parents. "She almost ruined Simon's robes." The last thing I want is for my parents to say anything to Simon. If they do, I'll be the one in trouble. I have to take his side and defend his behavior.

Dad frowns. "That doesn't matter, Isobelle. Children make mistakes, and the two of you don't need to be angry with Delphine over something as simple as that."

"I'm not angry," I say flatly.

"She just doesn't care at all," Rose interrupts. That isn't true, and I won't let it bother me, since Rose has no idea what goes on in my home.

"If she was a little boy, you wouldn't think anything of how we spoke to her," I continue. I have to raise Delphine correctly. If she isn't tough, there's no way she'll ever survive. No one knows that better than I do.

Mum gives me an earnest look. "Isobelle, it isn't that. Perhaps you need an outsider's perspective, but it seems Delphine is afraid of the two of you," she says.

Not me, it's just Simon. "She isn't," I say shortly, taking a long sip of wine. "She's disciplined."

Mum opens her mouth to say something, but Dad shakes his head at her to tell her it's not worth it. Although I can't say so, it hurts they've given up on me so much.

"Do you really have to leave me?" I ask quietly, looking into Teddy's eyes. It's so early it's still dark out, but Simon isn't at home anyway. And Teddy has to be awake to leave. Everyone is leaving today.

Teddy nods. "Like I do every year," he says back.I know he doesn't want to leave me, so I don't know why he thinks he has to.

"Quit your job," I whisper seriously. "When Simon's gone, you won't need to work there. You'll have to take care of Delphine and me," I remind him.

He gives me a kiss, but stays quiet. I feel guilty about Teddy's circumstance. If he hadn't been so caught up with me, he probably would have already been married and had a child. But he's waiting for me to get out of this marriage with Simon. That's how much he loves me, and I love him too.

"I can't, Belle," Teddy says sincerely. "People would know."

I don't object to Teddy having a job. But since he works at Hogwarts, I never get to see him during term. Only during holidays, and only in secret.

"Sometimes, I wish people knew," I say, my eyes downcast. Teddy kisses my cheek gently, and I wince. "He hit me again yesterday."

Teddy bites his lip. He never asks why, because it doesn't matter. I love him for that. "I'm sorry, Belle," he apologizes.

"Christmas," I say, giving Teddy a determined look. "I was thinking we should do it on Christmas."

Teddy frowns. "Do what?"

"Kill Simon," I answer simply. It isn't my perfect idea of a holiday, but that's as long as I'm willing to wait. Whatever comes to Simon, he deserves it. "With all the gift-giving, I could make it an accident, and we could make it very convincing."

"I don't want to talk about this right now," Teddy tells me. "This is my last day here, and I'd rather spend it right."

"Yes or no?" I ask. I'm not moving any further with Teddy until I have his confirmation.

Teddy sighs. "Yes. I- We'll do it. I promise. I'd do anything for you, Belle."

"Are you just saying that because you're about to sleep with me?" I ask, putting my fingers under Teddy's chin and making him look at me.

Teddy shakes his head. "Of course, not. I'm saying it because you're the most important woman in the world to me."

I give Teddy a small smile and move closer to him. "My heart is going to die when you leave," I whisper, giving Teddy a longing kiss that he doesn't mind making deeper.

"That's a terrible choice of words," Teddy smirks. His hands move around my body, into my hair, and he's so gentle. Teddy kisses me over and over. What am I supposed to do when I'm sad or lonely when he's gone? Teddy's my whole world.

"Well, I have a terrible husband."

"I'm sorry," Teddy apologizes again with a troubled look on his face. His eyebrows wrinkle.

I shake my head at Teddy and put my finger over his lips. "You never have to apologize to me," I assure him. "Never, love."

Teddy gives me a small smile. "But I feel like I have to. This isn't what you deserve."

I nod. "You are. We're wasting time." In no time, Teddy's shirt is over his head and on the floor, and we can hardly bear to stop kissing long enough to get undressed. "Teddy… hurry," I say breathlessly. We only have around an hour left, and I'd like to make the most of it. What I want more than anything is to conceive his child. I just wish I could tell him that.

"I love you," Teddy tells me," burying his face in my neck. Coming from him, those three words mean the world. I know they'll mean even more on our wedding day.

"I can't wait for him to be dead," I say, a vicious smile on my face as I near Teddy's waist with my lips.

"I know," Teddy agrees, "Me either."

"You're going to kill a man," I remind Teddy. "I think it's romantic of you. I can't believe you had your reservations."

Teddy shrugs. "Now I don't. There aren't a lot of people I wouldn't kill for you. I hope you know that."

I kiss my way down Teddy's chest. "Imagine our wedding day, how beautiful it will be."

Teddy nods, looking down at me. Even though he's so kind, I think there's something inside him that's thrilled he's going to do such a terrible thing to have me. And not just for a couple hours like we've been doing. He can have me forever.

"I can't wait."

Neither can I. I want nothing more than to watch Simon die, to see him pleading with me to help him the way I've always pleaded with him. And I'm going to help him exactly as much as he helped me.

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