4th July 2010
Sorrow could be described in many ways. In her way, it would involve crying, a hell lot of pain and depression as big as it can get. What bothered her was that it had been more than six months and she still wasn't over it. How hard could it be? What they had wasn't even a relationship. It was just sex and along the way she fell for him but he didn't catch her.
She hated that she didn't seem to get over it. How could she not? Everyone breaks up sometime and they hurt for a few weeks not for longer than half a year! She was not so special, was she? Not special enough to feel this was. God never treated her special; she didn't think this was the right way to treat her… 'special'.
She should probably just not think about how everything started to change on this day. Today two years ago her life changed and now, two years later it had reached its low. Maybe she would just have to think this all was a dream and then get drunk and actually believe the lie she'd tell herself. But she knew it wouldn't work this way.
Sighing, Miley grabbed the jean shorts and the shirt she had prepared for this party. Once again, the town would get together as they'd celebrate one of the most popular events in their country. Demi would get her since her mother was now part of the people who built up all the things they'd need for the party.
Pulling on all her stuff, Miley stared at herself in the mirror. She applied some heavy make-up and sighed at her hair. She tried to curl it - didn't work. She tried to straighten it - for some reason, didn't work. After half an hour, she decided that it wasn't worth it anyway and she left it like it was. A total mess on her head.
The door bell rang and she knew Demi had arrived. Miley walked out of the bathroom. What people didn't know yet was that she had dyed her hair black. Demi would be surprised but it's not like Miley really cared. And it wasn't like it was a completely dark black. It didn't look like it was too much.
Sighing, Miley opened the door to hear Demi singing the National Anthem as loud as she could. Demi loved the holiday, alright. But her singing soon turned into excited but confused squealing. Demi took a strand of Miley's hair in-between her fingers, accidentally pulling on it too much. Miley yelped and pulled her hair out of Demi's grasp.
"Ow! Demi!" Demi put her hands down and looked apologetically.
"Sorry… wow, Miles! What did you do?" Miley shrugged and let her come into the house. They walked into the living room and sat down on the couch, now waiting until the right time to leave.
"Uhm, I went to the mall and… told them to dye my hair." Demi rolled her eyes and shook her head.
"I meant why did you do it? Your brown hair was so beautiful!" Miley shrugged and played with a black strand.
"Uhm… my hair matches my mood. Today two years ago this all started." Demi sighed and patted Miley's knee.
"I'm sorry… I know you don't want to go there today but… you never know what might happen. Maybe you'll meet 'the one' or something." Miley rolled her eyes and played with her fingers. Her nails were covered with black nail polish.
"I already did and he broke my heart. There's no one else." Demi wanted to roll her eyes. Obviously, if he hurt her, he couldn't be the one, right? But people hurt all the time and they fall for others all the time. They think they found the one and maybe they're right. Maybe the other just doesn't think that they are the one.
"There could be… just think about it, Mile. He is one out of billions of guys out there." Miley looked at Demi pointedly.
"And at least ¾ don't live in the U.S." Demi shrugged.
"But it's the thought that counts. There are that many guys out there and you'll find the right one. Maybe he wasn't the right one." Miley shook her head and looked at Demi.
"You don't get it though. He is the right one. He just knows that I'm not the right one." Demi shook her head.
"You are the right one. I know you are! He knows it too. You never know - he'll be there too, maybe…" But Miley shook her head slowly and sadly.
"No, don't do that. You'll make me start hoping and I don't want to hope. Because if I do and he won't do anything then I'll be crushed. Maybe he'll be there and… that's it." Demi sighed and looked at the clock.
"Anyway, let's go now. It's five." Miley nodded and grabbed the hand Demi had offered her after saying that. Together they walked out of the house and locked it. Miley sighed as Demi drove off to their destination. The beach… where it all began.
"I'm not getting out of that car… not anymore." Demi sighed and let her head hit the back of the seat. They had been fighting about getting out of the car for about twenty minutes.
"Come on… just because you now know he's here doesn't mean anything! He might as well leave in a second or in two… or he might not acknowledge you at all…" That didn't really help Miley. She saw him walk away with his friends. She wasn't sure if that was a positive thing. She didn't want to bump into him but she also didn't want to… not see him.
"Thanks, that's what I really wanted to hear." Miley then jumped out of the car and stomped over to where everything was happening. The parents and elderly people were gathered around a huge bonfire while the kids had walked away a bit to have their own party - just like two years ago. Demi and Miley had planned to just walk completely away from everything and wait for the girls there.
Wherever there was… Demi ran to the other side of the car and quickly linked arms with Miley. Miley groaned but walked with her nonetheless. They started talking about the most random stuff… just so Miley wouldn't think about that one guy that broke her heart and kind of ruined her life.
"So… did you see Melissa and what she was wearing the other day? So last year…" Miley giggled lightly at Demi's expression.
"She wore shorts… torn up shorts… maybe she bought them last year but as far as I know it's totally this year. I'm wearing torn up shorts right now." Demi glanced down at Miley and blushed a little. It was true.
"Oh… well, hers were darker than yours and we all know that light is totally in right now." Miley rolled her eyes and sat down at the shore. Demi sat down next to her and put an arm around her. She leaned her head on her best friend's and sighed.
"I know that you're sad and all that… but today's the Fourth Of July, you can be happy today. Nobody would be mad at you if you are. I'll only be mad if you aren't." Miley smiled at Demi and nudged her gently.
"Hey… I'm not sad… okay, yes, I am. But I'll get over it. And until then… I'll fake it just for you." Demi put a hand on her heart and giggled.
"Oh, I'm honored." Miley giggled too.
"You should be, you're the only one I'm faking it for." Demi pulled her arm back and played with the sand, trying to glance at her watch without Miley realizing it. She managed it and saw that it was almost six. The plan would start soon. Or… even sooner because both of them heard someone clear their throat behind them. Demi turned around first.
"Oh, what a surprise!" Miley turned around too and stared at the boy in front of her.
"What are you doing here?" He chuckled and plopped down next to the two girls.
"Oh… just hanging out with my best friends, got a problem with that?" Miley pushed him a little and he laughed.
"Seriously, Will, what do you want?" He looked at her and got up again. Miley followed him with her eyes confused.
"I want you to come with me… right now." Miley looked at Demi. She just shrugged and watched Miley get up too.
"Okay then… where are we going?" Will grabbed Miley's hand in a friendly way and pulled her along the shore.
"Uhm… to this… place and it's… just this place." Miley giggled and nudged him with her shoulder.
"You know what might help with your lack of words? A dictionary. Come on, describe this place better." Will shrugged and looked around. They were almost there.
"Okay… it's near the beach… and there's water and… sand." Miley laughed out loud. He was funny. With him and Demi were the only ways you could hear her honest and true laugh. Will let out a kind of relieved breath. If she was happy in some way it might help their plan.
"You're too funny, Will… and now can you…" She trailed off as she saw the candles in the sand. They were on a little hill so she saw what they formed. A heart. Miley put a hand on her mouth and turned to Will with tears in her eyes.
"Did you… did you do this for me?" Will looked at her with big and shocked eyes. He shook his head quickly.
"No! No, no, no, no, no! I… uhm, well you see, I…" He had a hard time trying to stall for the guy that actually did this. But he didn't have to anymore.
"I did this…" Miley jumped and closed her eyes at the voice. Tears immediately sprung to her eyes and rolled down her cheek. She didn't want to turn around. She didn't need to see the satisfied smirk on his face.
"Yeah, he did it. Mi, you might want to turn around." Miley held back a sob and shook her head. No way would she turn around. Will sighed and slowly walked away as the not so mystery guy walked up to Miley. He gently tucked her chin up and let his pointer finger trail over her cheek, wiping away her tears.
"Please don't cry and open your eyes… I want to look into those beautiful blue eyes…" Miley bit her lip and shook her head. The desperate guy put his finger on her lip and pulled it out from in-between her teeth. After that, he stroked it with her finger softly and enjoyed the softness of it. Miley whimpered a bit, still unwilling to open her eyes.
"Please Mi… look at me." Miley slowly opened her eyes. She was reluctant to, but had no other choice. His voice sounded so soft and sweet and he actually sounded as if he wanted her to open her eyes. And the second she did open her eyes, blue met brown. Brown met Blue. And just like that, the waterworks started.
Miley burst out in tears. She sobbed into her hands as she put them on her face. Nick sighed and pulled her into his arms. She didn't fight it which let him sigh relieved and hug her tighter. Miley pulled her hands away from her face and wrapped her arms around him, not caring if she would regret it later. She sobbed into his shoulder for about ten minutes.
Then she pulled back and stared at her shoes embarrassed. Nick sighed and pushed her chin up again. Miley didn't dare look into his eyes though. He sighed because he knew that it didn't really help if he made her look into his eyes.
"I don't know why I took to so long to finally grow a pair and talk to you. I don't know why I even did what I did. I don't know why I didn't tell you sooner. I don't know why I told you that feelings couldn't be involved. I don't know why I even made you agree to that pact. But I know one thing; that is that I fell for you so hard… and I hate that I made you hurt so much. But don't think that I wasn't hurting.
I did hurt - for you. I wouldn't really leave my room. I barely talked to anyone. My parents were frustrated with me but I ignored them. And then… one and a half months ago, Will showed up and finally tried to knock down the walls I built around my heart. I was bitter and depressed because I actually did fall for - out of all the people I could fall for. And he managed to get into my head and make me realize that nothing will come from nothing.
So, this is it. I don't know if I even want you to forgive me. I just want you to know that whatever you feel - that feeling is mutual. I love you, Mi, and I don't know if I can live without you. Those past weeks I thought about if I could live without you. I know what we had was not what you'd call a relationship. But whatever it was, it meant the world to me. Because we didn't only have sex, we talked too.
And I loved those talks more than I loved when we had sex. And I love you more than anything in the world. So I realized that I couldn't live without you. I had to for a few months and I couldn't handle it. And now… I'm begging you to forgive me. If you want, I'll drop on my knees and kiss your feet - I'll do anything just so I can hold you in my arms again and whisper those three words into your ear and make you feel like everything in the world is fine even though we know there are bad thing happening.
So, there it is… I love you and I'd do anything for you. I'm sorry for everything I ever did to hurt you, starting at the first day I said something mean to you until today. I promise to never hurt you ever again for the rest of my life if you just only forgive me. Will you forgive me?" Miley stared at the boy in front of her, tears running down her cheeks without a stop in sight.
What he said was just too heart-warming and nice to say no. She put a shaking hand on his face and wiped the one tear that managed to escape his teary eyes away. She bit her lip and nodded ever so slowly. If Nick hadn't been staring at her so intently he wouldn't have noticed it. But he did. He noticed that she nodded and he could not be any happier. But he couldn't believe it.
"Really?" His voice was unusually high and raspy. Miley giggled slightly and nodded. Nick let out a breath he didn't know he was holding and threw his arms around her. Miley let out a sob and cried once again into his shoulder. But this time it were happy tears. Nick rubbed her back and let a few tears escape himself. He just couldn't believe it. She actually forgave him.
No matter how happy he was right now, he had to pull back. This romantic plan was far from over. This was only the speech. Miley looked at him confused as he wiped her tears away and smiled at her. He rubbed her cheek softly and motioned towards the candle-heart in the sand - a very big candle heart in the sand.
"We have something waiting down there." Miley smiled at Nick and looked down at her hand. Nick grabbed it and immediately intertwined their fingers. Miley giggled lightly and followed him down the hill. She leaned her head on his shoulder and sighed happily. She couldn't believe that this just happened. He had this whole speech prepared and it got to her. She forgave him!
"Uhm… it's actually pretty cheesy - what I prepared I mean, so don't laugh." Miley looked up at him as he looked down at her and she shook her head.
"I wouldn't laugh at you." Nick softly kissed her forehead, making Miley melt inside. She smiled up at him and sighed once again. They arrived at the heart and sat down next to it. Nick grinned as he handed Miley a dozen roses with a teddy bear saying 'I Love You' on a banner.
"If you squeeze his left arm he says it too… with my voice." Miley giggled and squeezed the arm. She heard Nick's voice say 'I love you'. She held it close to her body as she smelled the roses, smiling. Nick smiled at her. Miley giggled at his goofy face and leaned over, putting her head back on his shoulder.
He put an arm around her and pulled her closer. This was so surreal to them. They went from hating each other to having sex with each other to being extremely heartbroken… and now they were in each other's arms. Miley looked up at Nick with her big eyes. She looked so innocent at that moment. Nick had no idea how she managed to do that but he loved her even more for that.
"I love you too, Nick. I love you more than you could imagine. Maybe you can because obviously…" Nick blushed as Miley motioned around them. She giggled and patted his cheek softly.
"But that's okay… how did you know I loved this romantic stuff so much?" Nick shrugged and played with her long and softy hair.
"Like I said, I loved our talks. I can remember everything you told me. And Will might have helped me with this." Miley giggled again and shook her head. She lay down and placed her head on Nick's lap while he continued to play with her hair.
"Will is one of my new heroes." Nick looked at her with furrowed eyebrows.
"So, who else is your hero?" Miley shrugged and looked around, pretending to think.
"Well, Superman, obviously. I mean, he's superhero number one. Then Will, like I said. My mom, because she just rocks. Yeah and then… maybe you." Nick laughed and leaned down to kiss her forehead again.
"How nice of you. Hey, what happened to your hair?" Miley sighed and shrugged.
"I wanted to dye it. It fitted my mood at the time. Now… not anymore. It doesn't look too bad though, does it?" Nick shook his head quickly and reassuringly.
"No, of course not. It looks pretty. But I liked your brown hair with the highlights better. Then again, you could have pink hair and still look beautiful." Miley blushed a little and giggled.
"Of course. Good then, I'll show up with pink hair tomorrow." Nick frowned and dropped the strand of hair he was holding.
"That was a joke, Mi." Miley laughed. Nick didn't think it was possible but he fell even more for her by just hearing her laugh.
"I know. That was a joke, Nicky." He chuckled and inwardly smiled at the nickname. Oh how he loved hearing it come out of her mouth. Miley looked down a bit.
"Uhm, I told everyone about… us. I mean, my best friends. But I guess everyone knows anyway." Nick shrugged.
"I don't want us to be a secret anymore. I want the whole world to know. Not that the whole world cares but I just want everyone to know." Miley smiled and nodded. She looked into his eyes.
"I want that too." Nick smiled down at her. Miley sat up a bit and leaned into him. She looked up into his eyes. They both leaned in and let their lips touch for the first time in months. Miley smiled into the kiss as Nick wrapped his arms tighter around her. They pulled apart soon enough and just smiled at each other.
"I love you." The words escaped their mouths at the same time. They chuckled and put their foreheads together as they stared at each other happily. But this was far from their end. They just got together, this was only the beginning.
Ha, there you have it :) I know you love it... I kinda did too :P Well, then, how about you just review and let me know if you liked it or not. You know, I wouldn't be angry or anything if you didn't like it. But... I'd love a review y'know? Ha, anyway, hope you liked it :)
Oh, btw, this was NOT the last chapter! I decided that it'd be so cool if there were more chapters so...yeah. I don't know when I'll update the next time though...
Thanks for reading this anyway and... yeah, okay, I'm done now :)
xoxo