Disclaimer: I'm sure you've realized that I own nothing, but just in case you didn't...

This chapter is dedicated to: hxchick, NCIS-fan-cecy, Rolfy and Sid B.

**

Riley had read the sign wrong. The hotel she was talking about was not "a few miles away." It was more like an hour away. Everyone was officially frustrated when they pulled into the hotel parking lot. Emily's hands and feet not only itched, but they burned. Hotch's sunburn stung every time he moved, and his hand was sore from steering the car. Every bug bite on Riley itched, and she was obviously not able to scratch them all, plus her knee was stinging under her many Band-Aids. Jack's ankle throbbed, but he was more annoyed that they had to leave the camp site. He didn't understand why everyone wanted to leave so badly.

They all filed out of the car, and Emily raised her eyebrows.

"We're staying here?" She asked. "It looks horrible!" Hotch didn't believe in ghosts, but he knew if they were real, they'd live in that hotel.

"It's better than the campsite." He scoffed as he wandered over to the door. He opened it, and found that Emily was even more correct than she knew. The hotel was nasty. Riley followed him in, and immediately burst into a fit of giggles. Hotch glared at her; he hoped that the hotel staff wouldn't hear her. Emily gasped at the hotel, and Jack waltzed in, in his childish carefree way.

"We're not staying here, are we?" Emily asked.

"We wanted an adventure." Riley said sarcastically.

"Can we?" Jack asked hopefully. "It looks like a scary movie in here!" He exclaimed far too loudly. Someone emerged to the front desk and smiled at them.

"Can I help you?" The man asked them.

"We...we were wondering if you had any vacant rooms?" Hotch asked.

"Actually, all of our rooms are vacant." He said with a smile.

"I wonder why." Riley said. Emily elbowed her. To any bystander Riley sounded sincere, but anyone who knew Riley, knew that she was not.

"We'd like to book a room." Hotch said quietly, and Emily looked at him confused.

"Here you are." He said, handing Hotch a key. "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask. I'm Mitch, and I'll be here all night. You guys are in room 1408." Riley covered her face in her hands the way Emily did, and she started laughing. She found it highly ironic that they were staying in a hotel that looked haunted and their room number was 1408. That was the title of one of her favourite horror films. Hotch caught the coincidence too, and he rolled his eyes at Riley.

"Thank you." Emily said politely.

"If you don't mind me asking, what happened to you guys?" Mitch asked.

"What do you mean?" Emily asked.

"No offence, but you all look like hell. He's bright red, she's covered in spots, he's limping, and your hands are covered in some kind of rash."

"Oh, long story." Emily sighed and they all walked to the elevator.

**

"If that guy isn't an unsub already," Riley began as she pulled her bathing suit out of her bag. "He will be in the future."

"Riley!" Hotch snapped as he too pulled out his bathing suit. There was a sign in the hall that said that there was a pool on the third floor, and they decided that they would spend the rest of the day swimming. It was noon when they finally got into their room, so they had lots of time.

"What?! He is unsub-tacular." Riley shrugged.

"Don't call people unsubs." He said.

"I called my teacher an unsub!" Jack exclaimed. Emily began laughing.

"What?"

"Yeah! She maked my mom come in for a conference, cause she knew what an unsub was. She said I was unrespectful." Jack explained.

"Disrespectful." Riley corrected and Jack nodded. After taking turns getting their bathing suits on, they all headed for the elevator and got in. When they got to the third floor, they were in for a surprise.

CLOSED FOR BUGS; the sign on the door proudly displayed the decay the hotel was in.

"Oh, that is wrong." Emily gagged.

"Ew!" Jack said after reading the sign himself. Hotch smiled at his son's reading ability, but he was disgusted by the bugs.

"Well, at least we can go there for dinner." Riley joked and Emily gagged again.

"Okay...let's go up to our room." Hotch said. He knew that Riley and Emily were both itching to leave, but he desperately wanted to salvage the trip. Maybe ordering a few pay-per-view movies could help?

**

Hotch went down to the front desk to see what movies were offered at the hotel. He also wanted to find out what the food situation was going to be like. Emily resolved to stay upstairs with Riley and Jack. The whole 'bugs in the pool' thing set her off, and apparently she was getting her morning sickness in the afternoon. Hotch looked at his watch as the elevator took him down. It said it was ten after 1. He, Emily and the kids were all starving, as they didn't have breakfast or lunch. The elevator was the slowest one he'd ever encountered, but Aaron eventually got to the main floor.

"Excuse me?" Hotch said as he got to the front desk.

"Can I help you sir?" Mitch asked.

"Yes, do you have a list of movies that we can order?" Mitch nodded and handed the list to Aaron.

"Make sure your TV is on channel 4 to order a movie." He explained.

"Thank you." Aaron nodded.

"No problem. Anything else?"

"Yes actually. Is there anywhere to get food here?" Aaron asked.

"Well...actually, it's closed." Mitch mumbled.

"For renovations?" Hotch asked hopefully.

"Yes!" Mitch exclaimed much too quickly. "Renovations. Not rats. Anyways, you can always order pizza from the parlor down the street. Here's the number. They'll deliver it to your room." Hotch made a mental note not to tell anyone why the kitchen was really closed. He thanked Mitch and went back to the elevator.

**

Aaron ordered pizza while Riley looked over the list of movies. Emily had not gotten over her 'afternoon sickness' and was still in the bathroom and as soon as he was done ordering, Hotch joined her in the bathroom. Jack coloured on a pad of paper that he found in the hotel room.

"Uhm..." Riley began.

"What is it Ri?" Hotch called to her from inside the bathroom.

"I think you got the wrong list of movies." Hotch and Emily looked at each other strangely. Hotch got up and went to leave the bathroom but Emily motioned for him to help her off the floor. He obeyed, and then he and Emily went out to see what Riley was talking about.

"What do you mean 'the wrong list'?" Emily asked, putting air quotes around the last three words.

"Well." She started and she began to laugh.

"What?" Hotch asked.

"These movies, they're not exactly family appropriate." Riley laughed so hard she began to cry.

"Why?" Emily asked cautiously, assuming she knew what Riley knew.

"This is a list of...um...pornographic films." Hotch's eyes nearly burst out of his head and Emily looked at her confused.

"How do you know that they're porn?" Emily asked.

"I'm pretty sure 'Doctor Do-Me A Little' and 'Buffy The Vampire Layer' would be pornographic names." Riley giggled. Hotch snatched the list from Riley's hands and groaned. Every title on the list was pornographic.

"Son of a bitch! Can anything go right?" He wondered out loud. Emily looked over the list and laughed.

"Those sound great." She said jokingly.

"Ew. Creep." Riley said. Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Everyone was excited to see the pizza was finally there. Hotch paid the man and they all ate the pizza very quickly. Riley offered it to everyone, and then reached for the last piece when they all said they didn't want it. She took a bite, and then turned very pale.

"What?" Aaron asked. Riley didn't answer. She spit the pizza into the napkin she was holding. She shuddered and then lifted her pizza up to her father. She pointed to a bug sitting on it.

"Oh my god!" Emily squeaked. "That was on our PIZZA?"

"That's half a bug." Riley said quietly as she ran to the bathroom.

"That's nasty!" Jack yelled. "Riley ate a bug!" Emily had to fight to keep a straight face on during the whole fiasco.

"You think that is funny?" Hotch asked.

"A bit." Emily giggled.

**

By nine o'clock, everyone was exhausted. They all agreed they'd stick it out for the night, and then leave in the morning. They assumed they'd live until then. For dinner they ate the food they were able to salvage from their camping trip; they weren't taking their chances on the pizza place again.

"AHH!" Emily screamed as she jumped up in the bed her and Hotch were sharing.

"What the hell?" Riley exclaimed as her and Jack both sat up.

"Don't say hell." Hotch corrected as he sat up too.

"There's a freaking RAT in our room!" Emily leapt off her bed and on to a chair. She began tossing things into her suitcase.

"I thought we would suck it up for the night?" Hotch asked.

"That's when it was bugs. Rats too? Not a hope in hell!" She cried. Riley and Jack both got out of bed and put stuff in their cases.

"I'm so tired from all of this; can we just stay the night?" Hotch begged.

"Aaron, they have no calamine lotion, so I've almost scratched my hands to nubs. This place is infested with bugs and rats. The guy downstairs is unsub-tacular!" She yelled. "I'm not staying her one more second!"

"I agree with Emily." Riley said.

"Me too. This is icky." Jack nodded.

"Alright!" Hotch agreed. They packed up all of their stuff as quickly as they could, and booked out of the room. The elevator took them down to the main floor at around ten o'clock.

"Leaving so soon?" Mitch asked, and Hotch threw money at him for the room.

"Yes!"

**

They drove for an hour and it was beginning to feel hopeless. Emily and Jack had both fallen asleep, and Riley was sitting awake, trying to help her father find a place to stay.

"You know that one day we'll look back and laugh at this." She reasoned.

"Yep." He nodded.

"It builds character." She said.

"Indeed." He agreed.

"But right now? I just want to kill someone." She sighed.

"I agree." Hotch laughed.

"THERE!" Riley hollered.

"What?!" Hotch yelled, waking up Emily and Jack.

"A hotel! And it's a chain one! The Four Seasons." Riley sighed happily.

"Everyone okay with that?" Hotch asked, and they all nodded happily. "Good, because I'm exhausted."

A/N: Alright, things will look up next chapter, but I couldn't resist messing up the first hotel! :) Anyways, I hope this was enjoyable. Whether you liked it or not, you should review! Yes indeed, please review!