BTW- If you have not checked out the newest entry into the Murt/Katt (I'm still debating...sue me. may be a poll question at some point) collecton...Run don't walk to read Matt Rutherford's Epic Romance by SuperGleek right here on this site. You won't be sorry!

It had taken Puck a few years, but it seems he finally understood that the swim team also had female members. Not only did this lead to Puck reducing the slushie facials for the swim team from ten a week to a mere three, it also meant that Matt had been drafted into playing his wingman at the latest swim meet.

If there was anything more boring in life than attending a swim meet when you didn't have a rooting interest, Matt didn't want to know what it was. Sure he would be mildly happy if McKinley won but it would be about the same level of happiness if the lacrosse team won. Great for them but it didn't exactly change Matt's day to day outlook on life or anything. As it was swimming ranked just below the hockey team and no one cared about them. Oh the meet was packed, but Matt suspected that was more out of want for something to do than actual interest in the team. Lima was a deadly dull town after all.

Of course the fact that Sam, the Sam Anderson as he had heard a member of the other team breathlessly refer to him as, was competing didn't help. Or the fact that rumors of his god-like status among swim nerds was apparently under-reported. They worshipped his annoyingly perfect ass. And thanks to those teeny tiny Speedos that were somehow considered a uniform, Matt had a perfect opportunity to see just how perfect that ass actually was.

Scanning the crowd, Matt kept an eye out for Kurt. It seemed unimaginable that he would miss this. Especially considering how many of their invitationals and rehearsals Sam had sat through. There was the outside possibility Sam wasn't the type of boyfriend that actually needed the presence of his boyfriend in the stands. If that was the case, Matt was going to start checking the back of Sam's head for where to put the batteries in because it wasn't possible for one person to be that perfect.

After all he already knew his crush was hopeless. He really didn't need it rubbed in his face (admittedly unintentionally) that he was just Matt.

"Did you see the body on that one?" Puck elbowed him in the side, pointing and grinning the way only Puck could do and get away with. It boggled Matt's mind that Puck could be so….well…Puck and get away with it. "Yeah she's going to be coming out with me tonight."

Matt rolled his eyes. "So I'm finding my own ride then?"

"If you quit being a bitch and ask a girl out once in a while, you wouldn't have that problem." Puck pointed out. "You're the one with the problem dude. I'm just making sure all the ladies get a taste of the Puck-asaurus."

"I won't stand in the way of such a noble mission." Matt muttered under his breath. Standing up, he tried to get Puck's attention to little luck. Sighing his defeat he just headed to the steps. Puck probably would only notice he left if the girl in question turned him down. And since Mercedes was the only one to turn him down, Matt figured it was best to start figuring out how he was going to get home.

As he pushed through the heavy gym doors and breathed in the chlorine-free air he weighed his options. Option one was making the embarrassing phone call home, which would lead to his mother questioning why he was friends with Puck in the first place. Trying to explain the politics of McKinley took far too much energy and his mom never actually understood it. Option two was calling Mike, but since somehow he had managed a "study session" with Mercedes, interrupting that might end of not only their friendship but his own life. So that was out obviously. Finn? That would mean Rachel coming along and there was someone who had a talent for bringing up the wrong thing at the wrong time. Artie and Tina were off somewhere being Artie and Tina. He liked them well enough but really a person could stomach all the happy settled couple vibe for so long when they were pathetically single. Santana and Brittany? He shook his head before he even fully considered the idea. Santana get near the swim team? Not on her life or anyone else's. He might as well just swallow his pride and start walking. It was the only way he was going to get home before tomorrow at this rate.

"Matt?"

Closing his eyes, Matt wondered if he was just imagining things. Turning around, he saw Kurt lounging against the row of lockers while trying to not actually touch them with his clothes. So this was Kurt's idea of school spirit wear, Matt chuckled to himself. He had been wondering about that. Instead of the same old McKinley t-shirt every other student had, Kurt had decided that skinny bright red jeans, a white fluffy sweater and a fedora with matching red piping was the perfect outfit. It went without saying that he pulled it off beautifully and that he should probably wear the fedora at all times. "Hey Kurt. Didn't see you there."

"Clearly since you were having a deep philosophical debate with your feet." Kurt shook his head in disapproval. "I hope your feet were telling you those shoes are hideous."

"I know you have an irrational hatred of sneakers but the rest of us like them."

"It's not irrational. There is no excuse for ugly shoes."

There was a three hour argument Matt did not want to get into again. "Why are you out here? Isn't Sam swimming or whatever it's called?"

"Do you realize what havoc chlorine wrecks on your complexion?" Kurt asked his eyes wide. "We made a deal. As long as I'm in there for his little laps or whatever, I can stay out here the rest of the time."

"So basically all you stay out here."

"Can you blame me? Did you see what they call uniforms? I thought what you wear for football was bad." Kurt shuddered. "The warm up suits alone are vomitorious."

"I'm sure Sam appreciates your support from out here at the lockers."

"Says the person who was just trying to leave before this event is over." Kurt pointed out. "Why are you here anyway? You don't seem like the swim groupie type."

"No but Puck…."

Kurt held up his hand. "Say no more. Puck and girls in bathing suits. I should have figured it out myself."

"Right and since he's picked his conquest, I am now officially without a ride."

"Puck is just so classy isn't he?" Kurt shook his head. "You're welcome to wait with me. We're supposed to go out after this is over but you're welcome to come along."

It was a dream come true! The opportunity to be a third wheel on what would be his most awkward social encounter ever. Matt took a step back in protest. "I don't want to intrude on you guys."

"You won't be intruding. Sam was just saying that he needs to get to know you better given how much I've been talking about you."

"Talking about me?" Matt quirked up his eyebrow and hoped his heart wasn't in fact beating out of his chest.

"He may have noticed your wall post about the score of movie coolness being Rutherford 1 and Hummel zero." Kurt shrugged. "And he wanted to know what was with my new obsession with Nathan Fillion."

"I told you Serenity kicked ass."

"Malcolm Reynolds kicks ass." Kurt corrected. "The rest? I don't think so."

"You just don't want to admit I will succeed in turning you into a Browncoat."

"In your dreams. You're staying and coming out with us." Kurt waved his hand. "Don't even try to lie to me about Matt coming to get you. I know he's with Mercedes. You call now? If he doesn't kill you, she will."

"So she does like him."

"More than she's willing to tell me but Quinn and I had to help her decide between seven outfits for a study session."

The garbled static-filled loud speaker rumbled to life as the same ancient announcer who covered every sport at McKinley announced the final heat for the 200 meter butterfly was next.

Kurt pulled on Matt's arm. "Come on. Sam's in this one and I have to go in. You can protect me from the lethal fashion sense in this room."

With token protest, Matt followed Kurt inside. Now he was going to cheer Sam on to what seemed to be certain victory. And if he knew Kurt, and he did, then he was going to be going out with them after this as well. He was going to be in hell. Absolute hell.

And there wasn't a thing he could do about it.