A/N: I have an update when it comes to the writing school I've applied to! Nothing that exciting, but I think it's necessary if I consider to write during the end of the summer and fall. The company «Gyldendal» will decide which 10 individuals they will choose as students in June. They have to choose between fucking 450 «authors at heart» so there's only a 45% chance that I'll get in ;-; But still hoping! Alright guys, keep wishing me luck! Oh well, PLZ ENJOY ;3
Demon mist.
I read the name out loud unconciously, once again. Gosh, I hope no one heard me… I looked around as I walked down the barely enlightened city og Tokyo. Everyone seemed to be way too busy thinking about themselves. I smiled and just stared at the liquid lipstick with the incredibly gothic color, which I loved. Loved. I don't want to spread fear just after the first day, so I think I'll skip this today.
I smacked my dry lips together and ran my hands through my tight pony tail. I was meeting my new client today. A client who seemed like a complicated person, based on what Onizaki-san said. But for the love of Buddha, it wasn't another youngster with love troubles! I sighed and felt my grip on my handbag tighten. I'm getting nervous, so I need to remember what a pro I am. I am proffesional… I need to remember that. I have feelings and I need to try to get to know him… I felt my pride build itself up as I laid my hand on my heart.
I thought I would keep my control the rest of the day.
…
«Shinozaki! Morning!» I heard Mochida-kun excitedly said the moment he saw me at the entrance, waving at me from his desk. I waved back and breathed out a laugh at him. He's so childish, isn't he? But I'm glad he isn't anti-social. «Do you know where Onizaki-san is?» I asked. His eyebrows perked up in realization. «Oh, you'll just have to go to your office. She and your new client is waiting for you there,» he informed me. «Ah, thanks! See you later, then,» I said and was about to leave when I heard his voice one more time.
«U-Um, Shinozaki! Wanna go for a coffee or something when we're on break? My treat!»
Oh no… This again… Last time we went out for coffee, we didn't have anything to talk about. Nothing at all. If it's gonna be an awkward talk between «buddies», I'd rather come up with a conventional excuse.
«It's my first time with this client. I think it's better to focus on getting to know him today,» I said as naturally as I could. He seemed to buy it, luckily. But he looked really disappointed. «Of course… Well, do your best!» he said, scratching the back of his neck.
«Thanks a lot!»
…
«Oh, good morning Shinozaki-san! Your new client is here!» Onizaki-san didn't even wait to say those words before I even closed the door behind me, leaving an echo. Boss had her hands folded together while she stood in front of… a familiar figure.
Wait… No way.
«It's you!» the young, blonde man spilled out from his lips before I realized it myself. He gave me a big toothy grin as I just stood there with my jaw hanging in mid air. Where is his shock!? WHAT ABOUT ME?!
«Huh, you know each other?» Onizaki-sensei asked the guy who apparently was my new client. «Yeah, kind of. We actually met just yesterday,» he explained, his eyes fixed on her lips. What?! She's not even wearing lipstick today! «Ah, how lovely. Then I'll just leave you two alone. I hope you two will get along!»
That was all she left me with.
…
I thought I was going to throw up right there. This is faith. This must be faith! All power was drained from my legs and I literally fell down on the floor, covering my mouth. «Woah!» he yelled out again and just stared wide-eyed at me. I'm gonna throw up… I'm so going to throw up!
«This was quite the coincidence, right? I had no idea you were a psychologist,» the guy said and chuckled. I just looked up at him like I was praying to him. I have control. I'm proffesional. I HAVE CONTROL!
Alright… I took a deep breath, got up on my feet and introduced myself: «I must say… Well, I'm your personal psychologist from now on. My name is Ayumi Shinozaki.» He looked pleased and returned it: «Nice to meet you. I'm Yoshiki Kishinuma.» Kishinuma-kun… Sigh, that name is suddenly so wonderful… Woah, I can't keep thinking of him like that! I have to keep it professional and act like the psychologist I am!
«Please, have a seat,» I said and waited for him to sit down on the beige, leather chair in front of my own office chair. He gave me an approving nod and sat down, so I did the same and picked up my notebook and pen. Sigh… Alright, let's do this.
«And how are you today, Kishinuma-kun?» I asked. With our introductions out of the way, he seemed really reserved and stiff. I know, it was a really dry question to start with, but to earn trust from a client, you have to be whole-heartedly kind. If you can only be cold, you have nothing to do as a psychologist.
«Um… Okay?» he uncomfortably replied. The way he spoke, almost yelled that he was against having a psycologist, but that was just a hunch. «I assume that Onizaki-san has already talked to you about the rules for me?» I asked. He gave me a confused look, so I explained: «The rules that I have no right to talk about my clients' conditions and secrets to other people and all that.» «Oooh…» he moaned out and nodded. «Therefore, don't hesitate to tell me anything. I'm only here to help you, but you need to help me as well. Do you understand?» I asked. He kept his gaze fixed on my lips the entire time I was talking, but looked into my eyes when I finished. Surprisingly, it didn't make me uneasy at all. It was like we were aknowledging each other by just commucating with our eyes. I was writing down general information about him, when he suddenly returned to his past talkative self:
«You're a nice person, Shinozaki.»
I stopped moving my pen and just looked up at him from my notebook. It was weird… Being told that straight up that you're nice was weird. But… How could he seem so innocent..? «… How can you tell?» I asked curiously. He puffed up his cheeks a bit and mumbled: «Your lips move so swiftly and your eyes… they kinda float over the objects you look at. With all that, there's no way you're a bad person.»
My heart grew wings at the warm words he used to describe me. He really has a way with words, doesn't he… He's different, and I'm not thinking that just because he talks different from other people. «You're very kind yourself, Kishinuma-kun,» I said, feeling my cheeks heat up. He gave me a slight grin and asked: «So… Aren't you gonna ask me questions?» I tilted my head to the side, giggled and asked: «May I?» He purposely copied me to point out the weird face I was making.
«Sure.»
…
«You've had appointments with your doctor for over 8 years?» I repeated, trying not to sound shocked. I'm sure it would've made him feel uncomfortable. «Yup. It wasn't all for granted though… I guess,» he muttered. He didn't talk about his issues, so I assumed that he didn't want to talk about that just yet. «… How old are you?» I asked after unconciously stared at him for a while. He doesn't look that much older than me. «I turned 25 last month,» he explained. Oh, only a year older than me…
«Kishinuma-kun, do you know why your doctor suddenly wanted you to see a psychologist after 8 years?» I asked. I saw two of his white teeth barely bite down on his bottom lip. He looked troubled as he tried to press the words out. I didn't want to pressure him, so I just didn't say anything and looked at his squirming hands.
«I…» he gradually stuttered out in a messy voice, close to breaking down. «My doctor… He thought my condiction was caused by a psycological issue.» Huh…? What does that mean? Could it be… Was it this Onizaki-san meant by «complicated»? «What made him think that?» I asked. «Well… He started looking into my past. Before my appointments with him, I mean,» he explained. The more he talked… The more I got attatched to his rough voice and the ties to his background.
«Did he give you any medication? Like, pills?» I asked, guessing that his condition had something to do with depression. He seemed to know what I was getting at, showed a small smile and said: «No, nothing like that. It was merely consultations and a few tests.» I nodded and kept writing down notes that I could just barely read.
…
«Also, this is all optional, but…» I mumbled as I picked up a clear notebook from my desk. «Hm? What is it?» Kishinuma-kun asked when I handed it to him. «This is probably very childish to you, butt his notebook will be your diary from now on,» I said. He raised his eyebrow at me, mockingly. «O…kay?» he said questioningly. «If there is something you don't want to say to me directly but still need to let it out, write it out,» I said matter-of-factly and practically forced it into his hands. He was hesitant, but he took it eventually. «Just to not show any disrespect,» he said.
«Well, I'm on a break now. Do you want a drink, or anything?» I asked. His face lit up like a little kid's. «Um… Do they have ice tea?» he shyly asked. «Mhm! Lime?» I asked, hoping that he would answer what I hoped he would. «Yes, please! Lime's my favourite,» he said. Now it was my face that lit up. It would be unecessary to tell him that it was my favourite too, so I just said: «I'll be right back.»
…
«Kishinuma-kun? I brought your ice tea,» I called out while holding the ice cold can and knocking twice on the door to my office. No answer. Did he go somewhere? I knocked again and called out a bit louder: «Kishinuma-kun? I'm coming in!» No answer. Oh well. Can't say I didn't warn him. I turned the door handle, opened the door and went inside.
…What the hell? Looking ahead of me, I saw Kishinuma-kun standing in front of the large window in my office, his back turned to me. «Kishinuma-kun? Why didn't you answer me just now?» I asked him. Huh?! He didn't budge. He just kept staring blankly at the clouds.
«Kishinuma-kun!» I yelled again. No reaction. Is he ignoring me on purpose?! No way, I must have asked him something that upset him! Well, first I need to catch his attention…
«Kishinuma-kun! This building's on fire!» I said in a panicked voice. Are you kidding me?! Sigh… Just as I was going to give up and sit down on my chair, Kishinuma-kun turned around and jumped when he saw me.
«Oh, you're back Shinozaki-san! Y'know those clouds that kinda look like paint brushes and feathers? They mean the same as those clouds from last night. They mean that a bad weather's on its way.»
Those small, unintentional clues he gave me over our consultation… They all enlightened me in that sudden moment when he turned into his usual chatty self. It was like the time froze. The sounds, the smells… they all vanished. My lips were shaking for a few seconds before I finally let out the words:
«Kishinuma-kun… You're deaf.»
A/N: Woah O.O Did you see that coming? I hope you enjoyed the second chapter! Plz review and UNTIL NEXT TIME ;3