Author note: There's about 12 sections of questions overall. And yes, I am having too much fun with this.

Personal Questions

1. What is your real, birth name? What name do you use?

Jonathan blinked. "You realise there's no way in hell I'm answering the former, right?"

"Darling, I didn't expect you to."

"Good." A grin. Jonathan held out his hand. "Jonathan Holster, pleased to meet you."

"Jacobyte Hasphane," said Jacobyte, shaking the hand... Then he stood up and flitted out of the room.

Jonathan blinked again. "Jackie?"

"You touched me," Jacobyte explained, voice muffled through several walls. "Disinfectant's kind of necessary."

Jonathan rolled his eyes. Jacobyte came back a minute or so later and dried his hands in Jonathan's hair.

"And... that doesn't count as touching me?"

"Of course not."

"Right. Good to know. Does tackling count?"

Jacobyte took a wary step backward, and, grinning like crazy, Jonathan pounced.

2. Do you have a nickname? What is it, and where did you get it?

"I do," said Jonathan, eyeing Jacobyte's grin with mild disdain. "And I got it from you, you twat."

"John-boy," Jacobyte unapologetically trilled. "You don't like it?"

"And still with the amusing idiot routine, well done."

3. What do you look like? (Include height, weight, hair, eyes, skin, apparent age, and distinguishing features)

"Distinguishing features?" said Jonathan, raising an eyebrow. He leered. "Well, I've got a really big—"

"You haven't."

"It's bigger than yours."

Jacobyte laughed. "It really isn't. Do we have to do this again, Jonathan? It won't end well for you."

Jonathan scoffed. "Coward. Come on, undo the fastening, let's have a look."

Jacobyte did so with a weary sigh. Jonathan followed suit.

Several seconds of silence passed.

"Mine does more things."

"Keep telling yourself that, John-boy."

Jonathan closed his wrist strap with a snarl.

"Brown hair," said Jacobyte, writing as he spoke. "Grey-blue eyes. Kind of pale skin..." He squinted across at Jonathan. "Yeah, pale."

"When we do this for you, you're gonna regret that."

Jacobyte hummed and flashed him a grin, then looked businesslike again. "Weight?"

"I'm lighter than you, fatso."

Jacobyte managed not to roll his eyes as Jonathan's huff. "Age?"

"A lady never reveals her true age."

"Height, then?"

"Fuck you, Hasphane."

Jacobyte chewed the end of his pencil. Wrote and muttered, "Five foot nine."

"There's nothing wrong with my height!"

"Did I say there was?" Jacobyte lightly asked. "Anyway, distinguishing features..." He eyed Jonathan. "Determined to compensate?"

"You die now."

4. How do you dress most of the time?

"I wear these strange things called 'clothes'."

"The question asked for most of the time, Jonathan."

"Okay, I wear you."

"Muuuch better."

5. How do you "dress up?"

"Previously mentioned clothes? I actually put them on."

Jacobyte shook his head.

6. How do you "dress down?"

Jonathan laughed. And laughed. Jacobyte shook his head again and put a line through that question.

7. What do you wear when you go to sleep?

"You."

"Because I match your eyes?"

"Damn straight."

8. Do you wear any jewellery?

"You're sparkly, Jackie, do you count?"

The pencil made a faint whistling sound as it flew through the air toward Jonathan's head.

9. In your opinion, what is your best feature?

"I..."

Jacobyte looked up from the question sheet. Raised an eyebrow.

"What?"

"You paused. I just gave you a chance to be vain, and you paused."

Jonathan eyed the ceiling. "I think my patience might be my best feature..."

Jacobyte choked.

10. What's your real birth date?

"If I tell you, will there be cake?"

"We haven't got any cake, Jonathan."

"Worth a shot."

"Am I crossing this one out, then?"

"If you would be so kind."

Jacobyte gave the pencil a little flourish as he did so.

11. Where do you live? Describe it: Is it messy, neat, avant-garde, sparse, etc.?

Jonathan looked very carefully from side to side, taking in the clashing paisleys on every wall and the eye-melting neon furniture. "Where to begin, where to begin..."

"Does 'hell' work for you?"

"I think it does, you know."

"Right then." Jacobyte wrote 'hell' in the answer space.

12. Do you own a car? Describe it.

"What's a car?"

"Erm... 20th/21st century Earth term. Thing with four wheels and an engine."

"No hovering?"

"No hovering," said Jacobyte, already putting a line through the question.

"Man, that sucks."

13. What is your most prized mundane possession? Why do you value it so much?

"Erm..."

Jacobyte examined his nails. "Doesn't have to be something in here, y'know. Could be back on Glariyo."

"Yeah, I know... I'm thinking, gimme a sec."

Jacobyte counted off several in his head.

"My mum's steera," Jonathan said eventually.

"You actually have a steera?"

"I had one. On Glariyo." Jonathan raised an eyebrow, daring Jacobyte to inquire further.

Jacobyte nodded. Smiled a little. "Okay. Mum's steera. Gotcha."

14. What one word best describes you?

Jonathan squinted.

"Ye gods, I can hear the cogs from over here..."

"Sod off, Jackie, I'm thinking."

"I can tell."

"Erm..."

"Erm fits perfectly," said Jacobyte, scribbling down the three letter word.

"What?"

"Next section: Familial Questions."

"Hey, wait! I had a really good one then."

"Too late, John-boy. You missed your chance. Now, moving on..."