Baby You Can Stop Running
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. All Characters are Stephanie's Meyers… Oh and some of the words in this chapter are hers as well… I just made some minor alterations.
Chapter Twenty Three
Bella
I paced nervously around the house, my eyes occasionally darting to the window as I looked for Edwards Volvo and I could feel Emmett's eyes on me though Rosalie was doing everything she could to get him to relax. He knew that Edward was coming over and I was dreading having him walk into the house to meet the firing squad, because I knew that was exactly what Emmett was preparing himself for. Things were only just finally settling in for the two of us and the last thing I wanted was Emmett scaring him off, because truly, that was what that conversation was going to do.
"Bella, Edward better man up and come inside when he comes to get you." His voice broke through the loud thoughts in my head and I stopped pacing to turn to look towards the couch. For once I was thankful that Emmett had not followed in Charlie's footsteps, otherwise I would have been certain that the rifle would be resting on his legs just waiting…
"Emmett… Please not tonight." I pouted, my eyes darting to Rose who merely sat there, her face contemplative.
"I'm not going to do anything." He said somberly before his face broke out into a smirk. "Much…"
"Emmett I think you should let them be for a little while…" Rosalie interrupted and I looked at her, saying a silent thank you.
"But I just want to have a little fun." He grinned. "I should get Dad's riffle. That will be sure to scare him."
"NO!" I shouted and clasped my hands over my mouth as both sets of eyes flew onto my body, shocked by my loud outburst. "I mean… No?" My cheeks were hot with embarrassment and Emmett's loud laugh billowed through the small family room.
"I'm only kidding Bella."
"No you weren't."
"Okay, maybe I wasn't."
"My point exactly." I replied, my eyes casting a glance back out the window. The street was still quiet. "Please Emmett… We are still trying to figure things out."
"Fine Bella… One week… Then I have the talk."
"Three weeks." I retorted.
"A week and a half."
"Fine." I grumbled. I would give in now, but when the time came, I would argue with him again.
A flash of silver caught my eye and I bolted to the door, grabbing my purse as I made my way, all the while hoping that I could make it to his car before my vendetta against gravity took over.
Edward
"Whoa… Where's the fire?" I smiled as Bella jumped into the passenger side seat of my car, not even giving me the chance to get out and open her door for her.
She was panting, slightly out of breath from the exertion. "Just… Go…"
"What's wrong?" I could hear the panic in my voice as I pulled back onto the road and began the drive towards my own home.
"Emmett." She grumbled and I turned my head to look at her, about to ask her what he had done. "Don't ask." With that I was silenced. "Where are we going?"
"I hope you don't mind but I told Esme that I would bring you by…" I moved my hand in an attempt to tug at my hair but she caught it with her own and squeezed it slightly in a reassuring manner which made me smile.
"I don't mind at all." I turned my head and looked at her, noticing that she had changed her shirt. She was wearing blue again and I bit my lip slightly.
"You look lovely by the way." I finally spoke, and watched as her cheeks reddened. The rest of the ride was silent, except for the music that was playing softly and ten minutes later I pulled into the driveway.
She sat there and I was thankful for that, at least this time I could make it to her door and open it before she could protest. Still, she must have been lost in thought because I saw her jump slightly as the door opened and I realized that she was still buckled in.
"What if they don't like me?" She whispered and stepped out. I instinctively reached for her hand.
"They will adore you." I assured her and walked to the porch, my thumb rubbing small circles on the back of her hand in an attempt to calm her. I paused at the door before turning to look at her. "You don't have to do this if you don't want to ."
She let out a soft sigh before her gaze meet my own. "No… I want to."
I smiled and opened the door, pulling her in with me. Carlisle and Esme stood there waiting to greet us, they knew how long it took to get into town but it still startled me for a moment, but then I saw the smiles on their faces and I relaxed immediately. They were happy to meet her… They loved her just as much as I did and they hadn't even met her yet, well, at least not formally.
"Carlisle, Esme," I spoke softly, still holding onto Bella's small hand, "this is Bella."
"It's so nice to see you again Dr. Cullen." She spoke and he smiled back at her. I assumed they had met back when Bella had lived in Forks… She had probably hurt herself somehow. I flinched at the thought that something could have happened and I could have done nothing to protect her from it.
Carlisle stepped forward and extended his hand towards her which she took in the one that was not gripping onto my own. "Please, no need for formalities. Call me Carlisle." He smiled and I watched as she grinned back at him and I felt myself instantly relax.
When they dropped hands, Esme stepped forward, a brilliant smile on her face as she moved closer and took Bella's hand into her own.
"It's very nice to know you."
"Thank you. I'm glad to meet you too." And I could tell she was. The smile on her face was bright and I dropped her hand and wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her into me, my eyes making contact with Esme's whose shone with unshed tears.
"Where are Alice and Jasper?" I asked though only seconds later I heard her voice booming though the quiet.
"Hey Edward!" She said enthusiastically as she ran down the stairs, a streak of black and white before stopping in front of Bella. I noticed the looks that both Carlisle and Esme shot her, the one that told her to relax and calm down.
"Hi Bella!" She smiled and leaned forward and kissed her cheek. I stiffened for a moment but relaxed when I saw Bella smiling, obviously enjoying the attention that my family was showering her with. I was thankful that they liked her, if they hadn't I wasn't sure what I would have done… Though, I don't think that was ever going to be a problem. Loving Bella wasn't hard to do.
"Hello Bella." Jasper smiled and it surprised me. He had been so reserved before, though it was probably obvious, even to him, that Bella wasn't going anywhere. He was my best friend… He would have to get to know her now.
"Hello Jasper." She smiled back before turning her attention back towards Esme. "I wanted to tell you before, but you have a beautiful home."
"Thank you," Esme smiled proudly. "We are so glad that you came."
I noticed Bella's gaze land on the piano that she had seen me sitting at when she had spent the night and the look had not gone unnoticed by Esme.
"Do you play?" She asked her.
"No not at all. But it's beautiful."
"Did Edward tell you he was musical?" I felt my cheeks redden with embarrassment at Esme's hidden praise. I knew Bella wouldn't pick up on it, but I knew what she was getting at.
"Yes… Well… Actually I intruded on him playing the other night. I shouldn't have been surprised to find that out though… Edward can do everything right?"
Jasper laughed and Esme looked towards me, her eyes reprimanding me without words, the ultimate mother look.
"I hope you haven't been showing off… It's rude and I taught you better than that." She scolded.
"Just a bit." I laughed and I watched as her face softened and I could tell that she could see my comfort with Bella. That she could see just how much this girl before me meant to me and I knew that she was happy about it, that it was everything she had ever hoped that I would find someday. Everything that I thought I would never find but somehow had.
"He's been too modest really." Bella insisted, as though she was trying to stick up for me, not realizing that Esme had forgiven me.
"Well… Play for her."
"You just said showing off was rude."
"There are exceptions to every rule."
"I'd like to hear you play again." She said softly, her eyes meeting my own.
"I can't deny you anything." I smiled, reaching down and pushing a few strands of hair off her cheek and I could feel Esme's happiness radiate from her person as she watched the exchange.
I pulled Bella to the piano bench and had her sit beside me as I began to play. She hadn't noticed but I had, that the room had emptied and it wasn't until I was finished that she looked around and noticed that it was empty as well.
"Where did they go?" She asked, her head now on my shoulder.
"Very subtly giving us some privacy I suppose."
"They like me?" It was more a question than a statement and I wrapped my arm around her waist pulling her closer and burying my nose in the long strands of her hair, breathing in the soft smell of strawberries and freesias, knowing that I would never be able to smell either ever again and not think about her.
"They adore you." I smiled, before pulling away reluctantly and tugging her up with me. "Come on… I'll show you around."
Bella
The house was larger and more beautiful than I had remembered, though that night had been rather stressful. Still, I enjoyed the tour Edward gave me, before we ended at his room, and he shuffled his feet nervously before looking down at me.
"This is my room." He said softly as I walked in, glancing around.
I looked around for a while, before noticing that he was sitting on the bed just observing me and suddenly I felt self conscious. He reached a hand forward, beckoning me to join him and I did, knowing that it was the only place I really wanted to be and as I approached him, he wrapped his hand around my own and pulled me towards the bed until I was sitting next to him.
"It seems to be much easier for you now…" I whispered as I felt his hand on my heart as we sat in the stillness of his room. I wondered for a moment if Alice might barge in but any thoughts of that had been instantly dispelled as I felt his cool lips against my warm neck.
"Does it seem that way to you?" He murmured, and I felt my heart beating erratically in my chest and I prayed that he couldn't hear it, or feel it for that matter. His hand reached up and cupped the back of my head, his long fingers laced in my hair and I suppressed the moan that was aching to be let out, afraid that if I did it might cause him to stop.
"Much easier." I said, exhaling slowly so he couldn't hear the breathlessness in my voice. He didn't respond but merely continued his exploration of my neck, occasionally letting his tongue glide along the surface, sending chills down my spine.
"Why is that?" I finally spoke, my voice shaking.
"Mind over matter…" He breathed, his warm breath fanning over me and I thought I might faint. "I don't care anymore… I'm trying to just be in the moment with you… To enjoy this." His finger was now on the back of my neck and I felt him drag it slowly over the exposed flesh causing my body to tremble slightly.
I pulled back and watched as he froze, his face contorting into an expression that I couldn't read and for a moment I couldn't hear his breathing. Had my sudden movement's caused him to think that I wasn't enjoying what he was doing? Because it wasn't that at all. I pulled away because I was enjoying all too much and I was afraid that if he continued I wouldn't be able to stop myself from whatever actions my body might force myself to make.
"Did I do something wrong?" His voice was low and worried as I watched his green eyes darken momentarily.
"No – quite the opposite actually. You're driving me crazy." I explained, my hand reaching forward to touch his hand and I watched as he considered my words.
"Really?" A triumphant smile lit his face and I couldn't help but think that he looked like a man who had just been told all his dreams were coming true.
I rolled my eyes. "Would you like a round of applause?"
He merely continued to grin and I felt my cheeks heat with embarrassment.
"I'm just pleasantly surprised." He replied as he moved closer, the heat from his body now palpable again and I closed my eyes and breathed in his wonderful, musky scent. "In the last few years, I never imagined anything like this. I didn't believe I would ever find someone I wanted to be with… And then to find, even though it's all new to me, that I'm good at it… That I'm good at being with you…"
"You're good at everything." I grinned and watched as he shrugged before we both started to chuckle at that. It was true, in everything that I had seen, Edward was absolutely perfect at everything he did and the fact that he doubted that he could be good at being in a relationship was startling. Of course he would be perfect. He was perfection personified.
"You still seem more relaxed." I noted as he pulled me up into his lap and I laid my head against his shoulder.
"As I said… Mind over matter." He replied and I felt his lips once again, this time against the crown of my head.
"But you won't try and leave now will you?" I found myself scowling at the thought that he might leave. I wasn't sure what I would do if he did. Now that we were here, that I had discovered what it felt like to be wrapped in his arms, to have his lips against my own, I wasn't sure I would be able to survive without him. I needed him like I needed air. He was quiet for a long while and it stirred up a panic deep within me and my mouth spoke before I had the time to process the words. "Don't go away."
"That suits me." I felt him relax and I looked up to watch as a gentle smile graced his lips. "Bring on the shackles – I am your prisoner." He was laughing softly as he buried his face in my hair and he wrapped his hands around my wrists and I was suddenly conscious of how small my hands were in comparison to his own. His laugh was beautiful and I was certain that I had never heard anything more melodic than that and I savored it, tried to memorize it in my mind. I had never heard him laugh more than he had tonight.
"You seem more… optimistic than usual." I observed before continuing. "I mean… You were so cynical earlier today… This is quite a change. Not that I'm complaining."
"Isn't this how it's supposed to be?" He questioned, releasing my wrist and putting his fingers under my chin, forcing me to look up at him. He was still smiling and I forgot to breathe.
"How what's suppose to be?" I questioned lamely and I realized I was panting.
"The glory of first love, and all that. It's incredible, isn't it? The difference between reading about something, seeing it in the pictures, and experiencing it?"
"Very different." I agreed and it was true. I had never felt anything like this before in all my life, even with Jacob who I had thought I truly had been in love with. How wrong had I been? There was absolutely no comparison between the two. This was where I belonged, right here, wrapped in Edwards arms.
"For example." His words flowed freely and swiftly and though I was having trouble being coherent with his body so close to my own I closed my eyes and focused on his words. "The emotion of jealousy. I've read about it a hundred thousand times, seen actors portray it in a thousand different plays and movies. I believe I understood that one pretty clearly, though I had never felt it before… But it shocked me." He paused for a moment as I looked up my eyes meeting his own. "When Lauren mentioned that Mike had broke up with Jessica because of you…
"I was surprised by the flare of resentment, almost fury, that I felt – I didn't recognize what it was at first as the only emotions I could ever remember feeling were guilt and anger… Then I began to wonder if you might want to be with him… He was a much better choice for you than I had imagined I could be even though I wanted you to be with me, even then. I knew I had no right to be so upset about it, and I tried not to care. But I couldn't stop the feeling from existing within myself.
"But jealousy… it's a strange thing. So much more powerful than I would have thought. And irrational! Vile Mike Newton…" His face contorted into a mixture of a snarl and someone who had just smelt something terribly disgusting and I tried hard to suppress the laugh that was rising within my chest, but then we both broke out into a quiet laughter for a few moments until a comfortable silence had fallen between us once again.
I thought for a minute before speaking. "That made you jealous though? Laruen saying that Mike was after me? Really? I've barely even spoken to him since I've been back."
"And I'm supposed to know that? You need to remember Bella… This is all new to me. You're resurrecting the human within me, and everything feels so strong because it's so fresh." His head nuzzled my neck and I sighed with contentment, nothing had ever felt this good before.
"But honestly Edward… For that to bother you?" I teased. "I see you and then I look at me and I can't help but wonder when your fascination with me is going to end… You deserve the very incarnation of beauty…" He pressed one of his long, pale fingers to my lips to silence me.
"There is no competition for my heart Bella. You have it. One hundred percent. No one can possess one tenth, no, one hundredth of the attraction that you hold for me." He was serious now as his eyes met my own once again. They were light and filled with a warmth that I basked in. "For the past seventeen years, I've walked alone, all the while thinking that I could be complete within myself, thinking that I could be alone, that it was the only option that I had. Never once did I realize that there could be something greater for me, not realizing what was waiting for me all this time, and not finding anything because you hadn't come into my life yet."
"It hardly seems fair…" I whispered. "That you should think that you didn't deserve anyone… And I had already been with someone. Why should I get off so easily?"
"You're right." His chuckle was morbid. "I should make this harder for you… You've only been through hell and back with Jacob…" I watched the scowl appear on his face for a moment but it was gone just as quickly as it appeared. "And you only might be risking your life by being with me if anyone were to ever come looking for me because of what I had done to James. What's that worth?"
"Very little… I feel deprived of nothing." I stated easily.
"For now…" He said softly, and I could hear that there was a hint of grief in his voice.
We were silent for a long while until I felt the exhaustion from the day wash over my body and I involuntarily yawned.
"Should I get you home?" He asked and I shook my head.
"I don't want to go anywhere." I replied, knowing that tomorrow would be like facing the Spanish inquisition when I would see Emmett but I didn't care, it didn't matter. I just knew that when I slept with Edward, when I feel asleep tucked into his arms, sleep had never come so easily or so peacefully and that was all I wanted.
"Then maybe I should give you something to change into." It was more a statement than a question and I watched as he pulled himself up off the bed and I let go of him reluctantly. I kept my eyes on him as he riffled through his drawers before shutting them and walking back, in his hands he carried what looked like boxers and a white undershirt.
"I would give you the sweat pants you had on the other night but they haven't been washed yet." He stated as he held the clothes out for me before pointing to another door off the corner that I hadn't noticed before. "The bathroom is right there."
"Will you be here when I come back? Or am I suppose to sleep in the guest bedroom?"
"You can sleep wherever you are comfortable."
"I'll be back." I smiled and jumped from the bed, carefully making my way to the door and feeling his eyes on my back the entire way while I tried hard not to trip.
Edward
I had changed into a pair of black pajama pants and stood by the bed, causally pulling the pillows off the bed before she returned and I almost gasped for air at the sight of her in my clothing. Suddenly I felt exposed and regretted not wearing a shirt but as I watched her eyes travel over my chest and the blush that appeared on her cheeks when I caught her, I smiled.
I got into the bed and watched as she did the same on the other side before she moved closer to me, giving me the go ahead to wrap my arms around her and when I did she snuggled deep into my side. I pressed my lips against her forehead and closed my eyes for a moment to memorize the feeling.
I began to hum for a moment before she looked up at me through heavy eye lids.
"Should I sing you to sleep?" I asked and she smiled before reaching up and running her fingers through my unruly hair. I watched her nod and before I began to hum the lullaby that I had made just for her, I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers one last time before pulling her closer to by body, listening to her breathing until I knew she was sound asleep. Only then did I finally allow sleep to take me as well.
A/N:
100 apologies for how long it's taken to get this chapter out… Finals week was crazy and I only just finished my thesis at around 10:30PM and I've been more or less working on this ever since as I had gone through serious writing withdrawal… I was so sick of writing about Judicial Hellholes and Legal Climates that I really needed a creative escape…
It's been snowing here in Washington for a week now… It's absolutely beautiful. I usually hate this town… But this town with snow is so worth it (I'm contemplating a drive up towards Seattle to see the city covered in snow… I went to SeaTac today to drop a friend off at the airport and that was pretty but Seattle must be beautiful right now)… Though I'm looking forward to going back to California on Monday… I pray my flight isn't cancelled because it's supposed to snow a lot more this weekend… For the three years that I've been here (last year didn't count, I was in London) I've never seen this much snow… I'm definitely bring my snowboard back up here with me. ANYWAYS… Enough about the snow, even though I love it.
So I think I like this chapter the most out of all the ones that I've written and I'm looking forward to see what everyone else has to say!
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