highschool musicals story and its actors do not in any way belong to me i am just useing them in my awsome kick ass story they belong to the evil empire that is disney etc.

Chapter 12: so happy I could die

Enter Ryan

I was seriously regretting my choice to not go to the party. Parties were loud and distracting with lots of tings to occupy my mind where as the empty auditorium was quiet and the last thing I needed at the moment was quiet. Quiet would bring on thinking and thinking would bring on self pity. But maybe that's just what I needed at this point. I had done my time beating myself up for being stupid and telling myself I didn't deserve him but now I think it was time for a nice long pity party.

Congrats Ryan you lost. Not that troy was at all winnable. This is not a fairy tale troy was straight and any hope that I would be with him was almost laughable I could see his friends now enjoying a laugh at my expense. Ha what a fucking queer loser like anyone would ever think troy would actually like you that way. I could picture Chad to say something of that nature

Under normal circumstances I wouldn't have cared but this wasn't normal. These feelings went deeper then any I have ever felt for anyone before. I don't think I ever even truly hated troy either as much as I convinced my self I did I always had a soft spot for him. I think my dislike of him forced or not was the only thing that kept me from falling in love with him and I managed to screw that up to. Life sucks when you are gay you always fall for someone you will never ever be able to have.

"Ryan?" I heard. It was troy I couldn't see him because it was too dark but I knew his voice enough to know it was him. What was he doing here he couldn't possibly want to talk I mean what would he say? There was nothing to say to what I had said. So I didn't answer and maybe he would leave and I wouldn't have to look at him I just wouldn't be able to keep it together.

Suddenly the lights grew brighter and I saw him standing at the end of the isle where the light switches were looking down towards me. I wasn't sure because he was quite a ways away but I think he was smiling. What could he possibly be smiling about?

"Hi" he said raising his hand but not quite waving it was the patented troy greeting. I didn't respond but just looked at him. What could he possibly gain by being here? There was no way it could end well. Or was he just here to make fun of me. "I missed you at the party"

He began walking towards me and I stood up and walked towards the rear doors of the auditorium. It was too soon to have this conversation.

"Ryan no" he said running towards the stage. I could here his feet coming after me and jump ion to the stage. "Ryan pleases" two firm hands grabbed my arms and he turned me around and I could see the tears forming in his eyes.

"What troy" I said also tearing up " why are you doing this"

"I love you" he said looking right into my eyes. I would have thought it was some sort of sick joke if I didn't know his eyes so well and I knew there was nothing but truth in them. "I'm in love with you Ryan"

"Troy…" but I was cut off by his lips crashing against mine in a passionate kiss. I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him back. His lips where so soft and his taste was unlike any I have ever experienced. Maybe it was because I was disproving the impossible or maybe it was because troy Bolton was just amazing at everything. What started as a soft romantic kiss had quickly grown into a heated aggressive fight for dominance. His toung smashed against mine in pure ecstasy as our hands explored each others bodies. Mine found there way to his chest while his rested on my butt. It was everything I had imagined and more.

"I love you so much" he said between kisses. Pinch me because I must be dreaming. Here I was standing on the stage kissing troy while he told me he loved me. what I thought was going to happened and what actually happened were two different things entirely and I couldn't be more happy with the result even if this kiss meant nothing and there was no spark for him but just an experiment of sorts it wouldn't make a difference in how it made me feel now.

"I love you to" I gasped as our lips parted yet again for air. I didn't need any explanation I didn't need him to tell me how he came to this conclusion all I needed was his kiss and his hands touching me all over and his soft whispers telling me things I had wanted to hear for so long.

We broke apart and looked into each others eyes. No words were shared but none were needed we both knew we loved the other and that was enough. Troy took my hand and smiled at me "what do you say we go back to you're place" he said. I nodded and we walked hand in hand out of the auditorium.

Enter troy

Me and Ryan made our way inside unseen and went to his room where we remained the rest of the night in each others arms. It felt amazing to have my arms around him and I found it hard to imagine how I had gone so long not holding him. It was comfortable and romantic and complete bliss. And even though the road to getting to this point was bumpy and pilled with heartbreak at the expense of others I had no regrets. How could I when I had my Ryan?

Of course I would always feel terrible for what I did to Gabi but leading her on when my true love was Ryan would hurt her more in the long run. I will always love Gabi but not the way I love Ryan. Ryan is my everything and the only thing I wished was that I had realized earlier so I could have spent more time with him.

"Troy?" he said into my chest sleepily

"Yeah babe?"

"What made you realize?" He said now looking up into my eyes

I sighed " yesterday when you told me that you fell in love with me I was conflicted for a while I didn't know what to think of it but the idea didn't bother me it just made me want to be around you more" I said looking down at him " but I have never felt this way about a guy and it freaked me out that I was having these feelings and then tonight me and Gabi were going to… go all the way" I could tell it bothered him by the look on his face so I continued before he had a chance to say anything,. "And it didn't feel right because it wasn't with you"

"So you walked out on her?" he asked

I frowned knowing there was probably a better way I could have gone about doing things but nodded anyway.

"But how did you know that I was the one and not just some other girl?" he asked. I shifted my body so I was sitting up and helped him to sit up too and held my hand up to gently caresses his cheek.

"Because I realized that not only have I never felt these kinds of feelings for a guy but I have never felt these feelings for anyone not even her" I said. Ryan blushed and looked away it was clear he was overwhelmed with everything. I was overwhelmed as well but I was happy happier then I have ever been in my life and not even thinking about the consequences of my love for Ryan could change that.

"This all seems to good to be true" he said "I can't believe you're here with me holding me and telling me you love me it's like a dream"

"I know" I said putting my hand on the back of his head brushing my fingers threw his blond hair "that's what makes it so special" I leaned in and kissed him for the second time tonight. The kiss deepened in passion and I pulled him closer towards me and lay back. He bit my lower lip and I let out a moan of pleasure. I had no doubt that this was right. I had no second guesses or second thoughts' being here with Ryan was where I was meant to be. I slipped my toung into his mouth and he welcomed it with his own. He kissed like no other not Gabi not anyone I had ever kissed before and I loved every second our mouths were connected. Our bodies where pressed up against each other and it felt so amazing as he grinded into me. His legs intertwined with mine and our hearts beating in synchronization as our erections grew our kiss grew more passionate.

I couldn't take the pressure any longer and rolled him over so I was the one who was on top. My mouth made its way down to his neck as I slowly unbuttoned his shirt. He let out cries of pleasure as I trailed kisses on his shoulders and down his chest. I had never scene what's under Ryan's tight shirts but I was impressed with what I was seeing. He was more toned and muscular then I thought he would be but his skin was smooth and hairless save for a trail of blond leading down into his pants. I pulled his shirt off completely and kissed every inch of his upper body. My hand wandered down into his pants and I began unbuttoning him which was proving to be quite a challenge in my desperate need to take in every taste Ryan's body had to offer. I had never done this before but I knew I was doing it right by the look on Ryan's face.

I finally got his pants unbuttoned and began to pull them off now he was in nothing but a pair of tight underwear his hard length showing. I led more kisses down his chest towards his abdomen and grabbed his bulge. He let out a sharp gasp as my hand made contact and I began rubbing still kissing his stomach. I looked up to find a pair of icy blue eyes looking back at me. He bit his lip in anticipation. I moved up and straddled him gyrating my hips on top of his covered erection while I pulled off my own shirt and unbuttoned my jeans. I moved myself back down so my head was resting on his chest as I pulled off my pants and threw them to the ground.

I once again started in on kissing Ryan's chest this time gliding my toung over each of his nipples nipping each one as he moaned "troy… I love you troy". That was all the encouragement I needed as my thumbs found his waistband and pulled his underwear off. I grabbed his whole length and squeezed it. He cried out and I brought my head up to stifle his cries with my lips. I felt his hands reach down and pull off my own underwear. Now there was nothing between our bodies and the heat was incredible. His skin was so soft and I began stroking his member and his hand came down to stroke mine. This was heaven how I had not known my feelings earlier was baffling because I don't think I could feel a better pleasure then what was happing right now. Our naked bodies moved with our hand strokes I could feel Ryan's sweat against my own as I thrust into his hand. It wouldn't be long now I was about to cross a line I had never breached before and I was more then happy to finally release.

"I'm goanna come baby" I said leaning my head so I whispered it into Ryan's ear

"me to" he said breathlessly and within seconds we where both crying out in pleasure as we simultaneously came all over each other I collapsed to the side with my legs still inter twined with Ryan's our foreheads touched against each other and we lay there staring into each others eyes until are heart rate slowed and our breath came back to us. I pressed my lips to Ryan's and pulled him in so our bodies were press against one another. His penis was still in my hand and mine in his neither of us cared that we were covered in each others release. After what felt like hours of lying naked in each others arms we both got up and made are way to Ryan's bathroom where we shared a quick shower. After that we dried off hoping back into his king sized bed neather one of us wasted time with redressing. Ryan curled up next to me and rested his head on my chest and I draped my arm around his shoulder and slowly caressed his back till we both fell into a deep sleep. My last thought before sleep finally took me was that this was the best night of my life and I hope there was more of this to come.

A/N

HOT! right? ok so i am back home and there will be no more going away for quite a while so i will be working on this story alot more but it will be slow coming because i ahvent had the chance to write in a while so my posts are allmost catching up with my writen chapters and i find when i write one at a time i dont really ahvethe motivation so i need to write at least two to thrww more chapters before i post the next and once agian thank you for the reviews i got a little is better then nothing at all so i will update probs friday if not tomorow or the day after so thanks for reading and tyhis story is far from over trust at least 20 more chapters from now so i hope you enjoy and keep reading and sorry for the gap... well it may ahve been short for you but it was long for me =D review!