"Christmas is the night God smiled down upon his newborn son, Jesus

And yet, I am still waiting for the night he will smile down on me."- Excerption from the diary of Erik

Erik's POV

So much for me trying to be passionate with Christine on Christmas Eve. All I had done was try to make up to her for the worry I had caused, and what happens? Mr. Squelch interrupts us. When I left Christine earlier that morning, I only did it to get my mind off of a few things and to Christmas shop. I don't know why, but I wound up buying her the gown we once saw in the shop window. I was embarrassed however of what her reaction would be when she saw it? What if she didn't want to go to the New Years ball with me? I would feel terrible for assuming such a thing. After buying the gown, I had it gift wrapped and browsed around the jewelry store. If she was to wear the gown, she had to have a matching necklace to go with it….

I had been gone a long time, and the guilt within me for leaving her for so long had set in. When I got back to the flat to drop off my gifts, Christine was nowhere to be found. I was worried, and strolled off to find her. She was so upset over what I had done, that all I meant to do was kiss her all night long. But when Mr. Squelch came knocking, I left to go to the Phantasma stables. I was angry at him for interrupting Christine and I, but indeed, the noise coming from inside was rather dreadful. I unlocked the gate, and Mr. Squelch followed me inside as the horses neighed and kicked at their doors. I just didn't understand what all the noise was about. I managed to calm my horses down one by one, but Cesar was still having a fit. When I checked inside his gate however, the source of the problem was right there in front of me. There laying in the hay behind Cesar was Ayesha with five kittens laying beside her. This made me smile.

"Oh, so I see you found the source of the problem." Mr. Squelch added.

I rolled my eyes, and began scooping Ayesha up into my arms.

"Yes, now help me move her kittens to the empty stable."

I walked to an empty stable, and opened the gate before laying my cat down in the hay. Mr. Squelch came up behind me, and placed the kittens down beside Ayesha.

"More cats for the show right, boss?"

"I'll find something to do with them." I growled. "It's late however, I'd like to get home."

Mr. Squelch followed me out of the stables, and I locked the door before hearing him wish me a Merry Christmas. It was very late by the time I made it back to the flat, and not long after I laid down, Christine was waking me, telling me about how she had a bad dream. I offered her to sleep with me, and that was how our Christmas Eve ended.

When I rolled over the next morning, Christine was still laying next to me. I opened my eyes, and there she was, smiling at me.

"Merry Christmas, Erik."

"What are you doing?" I asked, wondering why she was staring at me.

"Watching you sleep. I've been up a while now."

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"Because you were tired."

Damn me! Instead of wishing Christine a "Merry Christmas" I act like a complete moron. Had I never celebrated a Christmas before? Of course I haven't.

"Merry Christmas, Christine."

This made Christine smile, and she placed her lips gently over my own.

"It's such a beautiful morning, Erik. It snowed last night! It's a winter wonderland out there."

Christine bounced out of bed, and placed on her robe.

"Are you hungry? We should have breakfast together. I can make cinnamon rolls…"

This was like a dream. All my Christmas's on Coney Island had been cold and lonely. I would wake and work my day away like it was just another day. But this Christmas was my first, and already I was enjoying myself.

"Erik? Does that sound ok with you?"

I had been lost in my train of thought that I had totally forgot about her suggestion for breakfast.

"Yes, wonderful."

When Christine disappeared to the kitchen, I stood up and threw on a pair of trousers and a shirt before joining her. I threw a log on the fire, and stood in front of the Christmas tree looking at all the ornaments her and I had decorated it with.

"What were Christmas's like back in Paris?" I asked.

Christine looked up from the stove.

"Rather boring. Nothing special, really. I always woke alone, because Raoul's relatives came over early. We would open gifts all at once instead of watching eadh another open one at a time. Then we would talk, mostly about business, and then eat dinner in the dining room. Nothing worth talking about…How about Christmas here?"

I fingered one of the red balls on the tree, and chuckled.

"Just another day, Christine. Who was I to spend the day with but myself? Working helped pass away the time."

Hearing this had brought Christine to my side.

"Let's change that, Erik. Come on, help me stir the icing for the cinnamon rolls."

She took me by the hand, and led me into the kitchen where she placed a bowl of white speckled cream in my hand and told me to stir. She then went back to the counter to twist the dough into the shape of cinnamon rolls.

"Keep stirring, Erik."

"Why are we doing this anyway?"

"Because my father and I used to do this all the time. It was a tradition to wake up and make cinnamon rolls for breakfast…though, Raoul never liked the idea. It's been years since I've done this."

My angel was so happy, and hearing her laugh was a precious gift.

Once she had the rolls placed out on the cooking tray, she pulled me to her, and placed her hands over my own that were holding the bowl.

"Now slowly pour on the icing."

She tilted the bowl, guiding me over each roll until the icing was gone. After she placed the tray in the oven, she handed me the icing covered spoon.

"You can lick the spoon if you'd like."

"I'll pass."

"Come on, Erik."

Christine didn't like my refusal, and wound up playfully hitting the spoon against my mouth.

"I told you I didn't want any."

"Now look at you." she laughed. "Your mouth is covered in icing."

But this was far from the end. When I tried to lift my handkerchief to wipe my mouth, Christine stopped me, and placed her lips over my own. I sighed…Oh, how I sighed at such a wonderful feeling. As our mouths kissed one another, I could taste the sweet icing against her own lips. This was heaven, surely this had to be heaven!

"Come on, Erik, let's open gifts."

She pulled me back into the main room, and knelt down beneath the tree. What was she doing? Surely she didn't buy me a gift…..but she had…and there was more than one!

I sat there in my arm chair, watching her hand me a small wrapped box in excitement.

She hopped into my arms, and pressed a kiss to my malformed lips.

"Merry Christmas, Erik."

"Christine…you didn't have to buy me a thing. You gave me my mask, and that's enough."

"Erik, don't be ridiculous. Now open your present."

Right, Erik, don't be a monster on Christmas!

I never received a gift on Christmas, and to say I wasn't excited about it would be a lie. I pulled back the red paper, and opened the box in pure excitement. When I looked inside, I was surprised to see a new pocket watch….but not just any pocket watch, it had my name engraved into it! I needed a new one because I was constantly having problems with the one I currently owned. It was beautiful, and I immediately tore the old one from my pocket to place it with the one Christine gave me.

"You didn't have to do that." I said. "Really…"

"Do you like it?"

"Like it? I love it, Christine."

I kissed her, and got up to get both of her gifts from the closet.

Deciding not to embarrass myself upon watching Christine open her first gift, I handed her the smaller of the two; the one that held the necklace.

"Erik! You didn't…"

I smiled, and handed her the wrapped present.

"Of course I did. Why wouldn't I? you bought me a gift."

"But Erik."

"But nothing, now open it…"

Christine tore away the wrapping paper, and opened the box. Her mouth instantly dropped open, and she looked up at me.

"Erik…"

"Do you like it?"

Christine took out the red diamond necklace, and smiled.

"Erik, it's beautiful, I've never seen anything so….so..Oh, Erik, you didn't have to!"

I scooted beside her, took the necklace from her hands, and hooked it around her neck.

"Erik, this must have cost a fortune."

"Don't talk about money, Christine. I have plenty, and there's no reason why I can't spend some of it on you."

When the necklace was hooked, I pressed a kiss to her neck, and looked at her.

"It was made for you, Christine."

"Ok, your turn!"

"No, it's not my turn yet." I said. "I have one more."

"All the more reason why you should open yours first…Erik, come now…"

"No buts. But before you open your gift, I must ask you something."

"Anything."

This made my heart flutter. Such a wonderful Christmas this was turning out to be.

"I don't think you know, but every New Years Eve, I hold an annual ball for my employees."

Christine smiled.

"No, I didn't know that."

"Well, I don't like to go, and I only stay an hour, but I was hoping that maybe you'd like to perhaps go with me."

Christine wrapped her arms around me, and hugged my body so close to her own.

"Oh, Erik, yes, yes I would love to go with you."

I had a date! For the first time in my entire existence I had a date to take to the ball…to take anywhere.

"Here, Christine, I can give this to you now."

I handed her the large box, and she tore away the wrapping paper. I waited anxiously as her hands pried away the lid and her face turned pale.

"Erik…." she couldn't even finish her sentence, for she was completely speechless. "Erik, this dress! No…I can't accept it…"

She slid the box towards me, but I slid it back to her.

"No, Erik, when I said…..when I said I wanted this gown, I never thought…I never expected…."

"You deserve it, Christine. I want you to wear it…."

"Erik…."

"And you'll be the only one wearing such a gown."

"Yes, because it's expensive….Erik."

I chuckled. Why couldn't Christine just accept the gift?

"Christine, it's yours, not another word."

With that, Christine jumped into my arms, and kissed me over and over again. If I could live one day every day for the remainder of my life, it would be today.

"I'll never be able to repay you for this."

"I don't want you to."

"I have one more gift to give you, Erik."

Christine reached over, and grabbed a smaller present.

"Here, Erik."

I opened the final gift from her, and pulled the contraption from the box.

My heart completely stopped in my chest. It was beautiful! Completely beautiful. There in my hand was the model of the white chapel I had carved for my Phantasma model, and inside was both Christine and I…But that wasn't all, there was a string attached to the top of the chapel, and a bell attached to the bottom of it. I didn't exactly know what it was, but I didn't care, it was beautiful!

"I hope you're not mad." I heard her say. "I shouldn't have taken your models, but I couldn't help myself."

"I'm not angry." I murmured, still amazed at the contraption.

"Do you know what it is?"

I shook my head.

"Well, when Raoul and I were married, we received a special Christmas ornament given to us for our first Christmas together. It's our first Christmas together, and I wanted to make you a special ornament to always remember it by."

I cried, oh, how I cried. It was beautiful, and I cried…. My tears turned into sobs, and soon, Christine was wrapping her arms around me.

"Did I upset you?" she asked.

"No, no, how could you think that. Oh, Christine, this is the most wonderful thing anyone has ever given me. Christine wishes to remember her Christmas with Erik….Oh, Christine…"

I stood up and found a special spot near the star on top of the tree. I hung the ornament, and stepped back to look at it. It was completely perfect.

"Merry Christmas, Christine."

I wanted to do something even more special for her. I wanted to give Christine something even more special than the gown or the necklace. I wanted to give her something she could take with her back to Paris.

"Christine, there is one more thing." I said. "But I have to take you there."

"Ok…"

"But after breakfast."

Christine led me back into the kitchen, and we both sat down and enjoyed the cinnamon rolls that she had baked. Once we were both finished, Christine dressed herself and joined me as we walked outside. It was cold, but with Christine staying close to my body, her warmth made me warm.

"Erik, where are we going?"

"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise."

When we made it to the Phantasma stables, I unlocked the gate, and led her inside. It was quiet now, unlike the night before. I led her all the way to the empty stable where I was keeping Ayesha and her kittens.

"Right here."

I pointed inside the gate, and Christine leaned over and looked at the small kittens that were cuddled beside Ayesha.

"Oh, Erik! They're so cute." she gasped.

"That's what all the noise was last night. Apparently Ayesha decided to have her kittens right at Cesar's feet."

"They're so adorable."

I opened the gate, and walked inside with Christine. She knelt down beside Ayesha, and gently petted the little kittens.

"I was thinking perhaps you might want to keep one….To keep you company when I'm not around."

"Oh, Erik, really?" she seemed so excited. "I never had a pet before."

"Well, pick one, and when it's old enough to leave Ayesha then we'll take it back to the flat."

Christine looked over the kittens, not knowing which one to choose.

"They're all so cute, Erik."

Finally, she pointed to an orange and white colored one.

"I'll choose him."

"Why is that?"

"Because he's the runt of the litter. He needs special care, just like you."

My heart completely melted. Damn me! Why did I have to be such a softy. While Christine watched the kittens ever so closely, I took a seat up against the stable wall. It was something I shouldn't have done, because memories of my childhood began coming back to me. I remember sitting there in my cage one Christmas morning. I was freezing, and completely naked. I watched as the gypsies all sat around their fire and made merry, while I shivered, huddled in the wet feces covered hay to keep warm. Everything soon faded away; Christine, the kittens….everything faded away, leaving the image of my master approaching me just like he had done on that cold Christmas morning.

"Merry Christmas, you little demon." he cursed, running his bottle of brandy up against the bars of my cage. "I hope you can forgive me for not giving you your gift sooner."

I curled closer to the bars, as my master opened the door and reached inside to pull my naked body away.

"Come on, little demon, don't be ungrateful…."

I kicked, and did everything possible to get away from him, but his grasp was too much. He pulled me straight into the woods, and threw me down on the gravel, causing the stones to cut my knees open. I was shivering with all my might, but my master didn't care, he was already undoing his trousers.

"Forgive me demon, I was selfish not to have thought of you first."

"Leave me alone…"

"Don't be ungrateful, demon. Now I will give you your Christmas present first, but then you must give me mine."

He pushed my face down into the snow and gravel, and I tried to push my small body up, but it was no use, it was only scraping my chest and arms. I screamed when I felt him take me from behind….cold and painful….I screamed!

"No, No…."

"Yes, yes, you like this, tell me you like this."

"Erik! Erik, are you ok?"

Suddenly, I snapped out of it. I was shivering, and Christine was now knelt in front of me.

"Erik, you were screaming. Are you alright?"

I tried to stand, only to feel pain in my bottom, the same agonizing pain I felt the day my master finished with me.

"I'm fine. We should leave the stables."

I needed some air….yes, that's it, I needed some air. Once I was outside, I took a seat on the bench right beside the stables, and took several deep breaths. Christine came running out and took a seat beside me.

"Erik, are you sure you're ok?"

"Yes, perfectly fine." I gasped. "I just had a flashback is all."

Christine hugged me ever so closely, and rubbed my back sympathetically.

"I'm sorry, Erik, I shouldn't have made you stay in there."

"My master…." I cried. "My master…he made me so sore."

"Erik, it's alright, I'm here now."

"Could we maybe go back to the flat now?" I asked like a scared child.

"Of course."

Christine took me by the hand, and led me back towards the flat as I stumbled along; the memories of my master still fresh within my mind. We were the only ones on the street, and as we got closer to my flat, I felt something hard bash me in the back of my skull. I immediately fell forward, and landed face first into a pile of snow. All I heard were screams….screams by my Christine. Everything felt fuzzy, and when I turned over on my back, I could see Christine being pulled aside by one man while another began fondling her chest. No! no! I wouldn't let this happen!

The man turned back around, and faced me…I knew him…it was the same one who had hurt me a few weeks ago.

"Merry Christmas, Ugly!" he teased.

I lay there in a complete fog, watching helplessly at Christine being fondled and teased.

"You're going to pay now, ugly…."

The man reproached Christine and began undoing his pants…No, no! I wouldn't let this happen. I laid back, and began rummaging through my coat pocket like a drunk man without straight senses. Come on! Find it! Finally, I grasped what I had been looking for; my carving knife. I whipped it out, and pushed myself into a sitting position despite the wooziness in my head.

I wobbled to my feet, my braces being the only things giving me support. I wasn't taking this as a joke! I couldn't let them harm my Christine.

"Let her go…" I staggered. "Don't hurt…her."

The man turned, his pants hanging down at his ankles.

"Fine with me….I've always wondered what it be like to have a monster…."

When he grabbed my wrist, a horrible memory of my master came into mind, one that I acted out on….My knife quickly made its way in my hand into the man's stomach. The man dropped back, and fell to the ground, the white snow around him turning blood red.

"You bastard!" I heard this voice from behind me, but by the time I turned around, it was too late, the other man had taken his bat and rammed the end of it straight into the part of my wig that cradled my exposed skull. Like one of my animatronics in Phantasma, this was my off switch….All the power was instantly drained from me, and I too fell to the ground, but not before stabbing him in the throat. I felt the life being sucked from my body….God had given me one of the best days of my life, and now he was taking it from me. It was as if all the arteries wrapped around my exposed skull had popped, and I could feel blood leaking from me…..I couldn't stay awake any longer, and quickly slipped away….

"Christine….Christine…." I felt myself calling for her. I felt everything…my throbbing head, my aching body….everything felt so real, because it was real. When I opened my eyes, the first thing I noticed was the Christmas tree glowing in the other room. Where was my Christine? I had to know that she was ok. My head was numb, but I could still feel the agonizing pain in the location of my exposed skull. Along with that, I also felt a bandage wrapped tightly around my head.

"Christine…" I whimpered her name, wondering what in god's name had on.

Finally, I heard the door open, and footsteps approaching my bed.

"Erik."

Finally, I saw her. She was ok….That's all that mattered…Her fingers reached out and touched my cheek ever so softly. She had tears in her eyes, but they weren't tears of sadness, they were tears of joy.

"You saved me…."

"I…I had to…"

"The police….they….they just left. Those two thugs…Oh, Erik you…you killed them both."

I was happy about this, but in my mind, I knew I couldn't be. It had been ten years since I had killed anyone….But I did it for a reason, it was out of protection, Christine's protection.

"The police aren't pressing charges against you, Erik, I told them what happened. But the press….Oh, Erik you're going to be all over tomorrow's paper. It's all my fault."

Great, that's all I needed….I was already the press's favorite person to spread rumors about, but now….god! Now they really did have a story, one that they would surely make into some fabrication of what they believed and wanted to happen….But all I cared about was Christine….She was safe.

"You should rest now, Erik. You're in a lot of pain. The doctor operated on your exposed skull. The bat cracked the bone, and severed an artery. You're going to need all the rest you can get. I'll take care of you, Erik."

Christine crawled in bed with me, and placed a kiss on my lips.

And then she did something I never expected. She looked me straight in the eyes, and placed a hand over my masked cheek.

"Erik?"

"Yes, Christine?" I asked in a low feverish voice.

"I…I love you."

God! Let this moment never end. Was this really happening? Or was this some hallucination from the medicine the doctor had given me.

"Christine?"

"Shh…Erik?"

"Yes, Christine?"

Once again, her lips met with mine, and we kissed, oh, how we kissed. Maybe she wouldn't love me in the morning, but she admitted to it now, and that's all that mattered. And when we broke away, she kissed my neck and cuddled beside me.

"Merry Christmas, Erik."

Oh, and what a wonderful Christmas it was…..

Ok everyone, please review! More to come soon! That and the New Years ball…Any fluff you wanted to get added in for theball, let me know…Thanks!