Author's rant: Last chapter was inspired by Gakupo's version of Just Be Friends! Heh, his English is really poor compared to his actual counterpart Gackt. However I think his attempt is cute as it's one of Luka's notable songs and tells us fans how much of an effort it takes for a non-English speaking Vocaloid to sing in English! Look it up on Youtube if you're curious. All I have to say about his version is:
Who the hell is "Fred", Gakupo? I can't even tell if he's saying Just be "fred", "thread", or "French"? OwO That lovable Gakupo!
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ShEnAnIgAnS
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HELLO KITTY TASER
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"Something's off," she frowned.
Nervously, he answered, "Don't worry about it. I'm sure it was just a rat. "
"If it's a rat, then I should take care of the problem," Luka replied, scavenging through her authentic leather Prada bag.
"Oh, don't let something as small as a rat distracts you. I'm sure it'll leave on its own… what is that?"
I didn't think anything like that would exist! He shivered as the adorable, blank eyes bore a hypnotic gaze. It's menacing and cute when it doesn't even have a mouth!
"Quit gawking at my Hello Kitty taser and help me find that pesky rodent!" Luka fumed as sudden blue sparks crackled from the deadly, pink gun.
Gulping, Gakupo threw himself to the ground to search with her. What did I drag myself into?' he mentally sulked. 'Seriously, this woman belongs in an asylum! He gritted his teeth as he crawled on the floor to check behind the shelves, 'After all, she gave me the diva treatment and then threatened me to kill me after saving her from the paparazzi a few times! It's almost as if-holy crap! Luka escaped from a military authorized rehabilitation center and is out to get revenge on famous celebrities who sing Miley Cyrus' songs in the shower… wait. I hate Miley Cyrus and how would Luka ever know something like that? So that's not even a possible reason…
The purple haired man groaned when he found nothing behind the metal filing cabinet. The best assumption is Luka has a multiple identity disorder! That would explain her irrational behavior. He shuddered when he glanced at Luka's pink taser. Hello Kitty…
"Be sure to check under the desks," she grunted after checking the dusty backside of a couch. "Don't you ever clean in here?"
He rolled his eyes, "That's up to the service to decide, Miss Megurine."
'Why should I be stuck with this inconsiderate woman? I can always find my inspirations from much polite and less hostile people!' Gakupo bared his teeth while the pink haired woman was facing the other direction. 'I was so much safer before I met this-mad woman! I don't care if he requested me to help her out as there is no way I can help out someone who belongs in an asylum! It's time I say something and I don't care if she zaps me with that Sanrio contraption.'
"Luka!" he blurted, but then quickly smacked his hand over his mouth. 'Wait I care! Hello Kitty scares me! She doesn't have a mouth!'
"You found that rat yet?" she raised a brow.
'The she-devil is onto me! I got to think of an excuse!' Gakupo said, "Your hair looks lustrous today!"
She tilted her head cutely and asked innocently, "Really? Is it that shiny?"
"Yeah, it's gorgeous!" the purple haired man smiled widely. 'She fell for it?'
Swaying her hips as Luka walked towards him, she huskily whispered close to his ear, "Do you know how much that means to me?"
Shivering from delight, Gakupo sighed, "Tell me, darling."
"It means," she softly brushed her slender hand against the collar of his shirt gently. "IT'S ABSOLUTE BULL SHIT."
The purple haired recoiled from her harsh words.
"Don't take me as a retard, Gakupo," Luka scowled. "Compliments are a true sign of weakness and cowardice."
Grimacing at his failed attempt, he replied, "You didn't have to scream in my ear."
Luka simply stuck her tongue at him. "Then quit messing around."
Another creak echoed throughout the hallway, which made the two shuddered. Gigantic rats… or worse a ghost…
"Why don't you check the front just in case they found their way into the building," she ushered him.
"This building is highly secured! No one could get in." the purple haired man huffed. How dare she underestimate the power of modern technology!
Luka crossed her arms, "That doesn't mean rats can't."
"Would you quit bickering at me?" he blurted. Just right after the lights turned off. Just what I need! Gakupo groaned.
"Great job, Kamui. Now the power's out," he felt her glare in the dark.
Rubbing his temples, he sarcastically answered, "I can see that, Luka. Thank you for pointing out the obvious."
She replied with a quiet hiss before they sat in awkward silence.
Breaking the silence, Gakupo quietly mumbled, "I'm sorry for my rudeness."
"What are you apologizing for?" Luka turned her head. "I was barely insulted."
His left eye twitched madly. This woman!
"Besides I've heard even worse crap coming from old ladies on bingo night," she smugly added.
She upsets the elderly as well? Dozens of rapid, angry thoughts began to full up as he tried to keep his cool from the massive tension. Megurine Luka is just an obnoxious, egoistic, extremely selfish little- The purple haired man continued to silently rant in his head. How can she be my inspiration? No one as rude as her could ever inspire me to write a new hit!
"Even though you're not talking to me, I can hear what you're muttering," the pink haired woman suddenly whispered.
Shit! Gakupo gulped, "I didn't say anything."
"Yes you did… you're talking about how you despise…" he heard a small sob. "My Hello Kitty taser…"
Good thing she can't read lips. Relieved, he replied, "I don't hate it. I-I just find it disturbing, and cute. You can still carry it around, just don't tase me."
She wiped her eyes, "Really?"
"Yes, I'm sure of it," he patted her hand. She's so bizarre!
The pink haired woman smiled while he smiled back at her. Another loud creak and the sound of a door being broken shook the two who ended up shivering in each other's arms.
"What is it?" Luka's bottom quivered.
"I honestly don't think it's a rat anymore," Gakupo squeezed her close to his chest.
Awkwardly she mentioned, "If we die here this very moment, I want to let you know I don't regret meeting you even though it's partially your fault that this'll be my fate."
Too scared to contradict her claim, he also admitted, "If we both die, I want to let you know I don't regret you either and I think I'm beginning to fall in-"
The steel door broke down and fell flat on the floor. A silhouetted figured carry a tiny minion whose eyes glowed red appeared between the door frame and staggered to move forward.
It's a murderer!
IT'S SATAN RESPAWNED!
A click of a button was heard and a bright golden beam of light was aimed at the two.
"What are you two doing hiding behind the desk like that?" a high pitch voice of a female asked coyly.
The Hell? Luka looked puzzled at Gakupo.
The lights were turned back on and there a girl with bright green hair wearing an orange jumper held a fat white rabbit in her hand.
"Is that you, Gu-chan?" Gakupo got up while blinking a few times to get a clearer look at the smiling girl.
"Why didn't you return my call, Gaku oni-chan?" she grumbled.
Gakupo pulled Luka up and answered, "I didn't know my cell was off. What are you doing here?"
"Gaku oni-chan told Gu-chan would help Nin-kun and Gu-chan record the last bit of the demo," Gumi whined.
Luka observed the girl closely. The soprano voice, colors of a carrot, constantly talking in first person and an obese bunny;
She's obviously GUMI the scatterbrained veggie princess. My rival! She balled her fists tightly.
"I told you next week I would help you," Gakupo sighed.
"Liar, Gaku oni-chan said today and today's the 29nd!"
"Gu-chan, it's the 22nd," the purple haired man scratched the back of his head.
The green haired girl looked confused and counted with her fingers. Realizing the mistake, she let out a loud giggle, "Oh Gaku oni-chan's right as always! Gu-chan forgot it's only the 22nd! Gomenasai!" Gumi bowed quickly.
"That's alright Gu-chan," Gakupo laughed lightly.
She smiled back at him and then diverted her apple green eyes at Luka who seemed lost with their absurd conversation.
"Who's she?"
"That would be my lover," he gestured to the pink haired woman.
"She sure is pretty!" Gumi chirped. "I've never seen someone with that shade of pink. Is it natural?"
Luka nodded. Oh she's good!
"Babe, do you mind if I just handle Gumi's problem before getting back to your song?" he asked.
Sure I don't mind. I don't mind if you suddenly direct your attention to this complete stranger when you clearly were working with me first! Attempting to not grit her teeth in front of them, she dazzled him with a plastic smile and nodded stiffly.
"Great, it'll just take a moment," Gakupo replied and diverted his eyes to the girl with a short attention span trying to grab her fat rabbit who was hopping away. A sweat drop appeared on the side of his head. "Gu-chan… you shouldn't chase Ninjin with a microphone! You'll scare him even more." Sighing, he went to help his scatter brained junior retrieve her pet.
What a ditz, Luka rolled her eyes.
Bored, she observed her surroundings. Indeed Kamui Gakupo's a successful musician with his own brand new mansion, recording studio, limited edition guitars, and even his own line of clothes. Wait, what? Her eyes could not pull away from the fairly large poster that advertised his brand. Well it's no Sean John. He only sells women attire! Luka examined the tiny print on the side. Next month is featuring Megurine Luka for the secret petal collection? When did I ever agree to such a thing? Was I drunk? She continuously ranted in her head.
"Ok Luka-chan! Now I got things handled with Gumi, let's go back to your dem- why are you ripping up that poster?" Gakupo gulped. "And why are you clutching that lamp?"
"Explain this," she coldly said as she shoved the ripped section of the tiny print.
Skimming the writing, the purple haired man grinned and lowered her arm that was raised to strike him with a common household object. He merely chuckled.
"There's nothing funny about claiming I'm a model!" Luka huffed. "I never agreed to such a thing."
"You're right," he calmly said with a slight perverted smile on his face. "You didn't agree to model my newest collection."
She raised a finely arched brow.
"But if you agreed, it'll boost your self-esteem and even bring more popularity among fans."
"Just before I agree to anything, exactly what am I modeling?" she retorted back.
She has to model it as it'll only match her… sort of, but Luka might not even accept it. I can't let my inspiration go down the drain! Gakupo answered, "I can't tell you as you're not even sure in accepting the role."
Clenching her teeth, "Fine, I accept."
"That's not good enough, wifey," he playfully shook his head. "I'm going to need you to sign the contract." The purple haired man opened a nearby drawer to take out a thick packet of papers. "Just sign here, please!" She's going to accept!
"Then I won't sign it if it must be legal permission," she turned her head.
"Very well then," he feigned a sigh. "I'll just- ask Gumi to do it. After all that's what she came in for."
Fuming, she exclaimed, "Fine! I'll do it! Hand me those papers and a pen." Fiercely, Luka snatched the pen he handed her and rapidly scribbled her signature without reading the text.
You may be intimidating Luka, but oh how you're so gullible to contracts and minor taunts! He chuckled. "Perfect, now I will I will examine if you're suitable for the role!"
"T-there's more?" she twitched.
"It's barely anything," he smiled at her. "Just got to make sure if you're right for it. The contract is just a precaution!" Gazing into her clear aquamarine eyes he couldn't help, but think about her eyes resemble pure ponds. With her eyes heavy, her long, dark lashes lowered and framed around the rims of the almond shape.
"You done yet?"
"Well all I know is you have a pretty face," Gakupo replied. "You have a decent height as well. What are you, 5'4?" (162 cm)?"
"That's an exact estimation," she nodded. "Well?"
"I will admit you're well fit." Maybe a little too much. She's curvy!
"So do I pass inspection?"" she asked annoyed.
"I think you're good enough for the role," Gakupo said sternly. "However can you act?"
"Why?"
"Because you're going to play as Cutie Honey in my first launch of women lingerie collection!" he shouted gleefully.
Side note: If you don't know who Cutie Honey is, then Wikipedia it, Google it, or check out the Cutie Honey Nico Douga Douga Vocaloid spoof on my homepage! Warning to all Luka fans, this was not created by me! Now laugh people and beware of possible nose bleeds!