Finally! I had to think a lot about this story when writing this chapter, and I also had to consider where I want Hikari's personality and path to go. I hope that my decisions are logical and dont dissapoint too many of you, but know that I am the writer, and hence I know more about where the story's going than you (duhhhhh) and that something you don't agree with may play a huge part in the rest of the story.

anyhoo, i loved writing this chapter, and I hope that you all find it as fun and entertaining as I do. I think that this chapter really demonstrates the inner tones of Hikari's personality, and solidifies the relationship she has with her past, more vulnerable self...maybe its just me, but i hope that it clears things up with you all too.

PLEASE REVIEW! Is Hikari believable? Is everyone in character? PLEASE LET ME KNOW!

Chapter 22

I wasn't really awake, but at the same time I was much more than asleep. Does that even make sense? But what was more irritating was the fact that this feeling was pretty familiar to me, I'd experienced it so many times now that it was almost commonplace.

How pathetic. And I had told Sasuke that he wouldn't have to save me again, I had promised him that I would be stronger.

And look at me now.

Normally in these trance-like sessions I was so used to, I would just sit there in the room of whiteness and think about what I was feeling or some other type of emotional crap that was apart of my day-to-day existence. But this time, I was sitting down, and a shadowy figure sat across from me, and I recognized her to be a ninja, her long blonde hair hanging in waves to her waist, her gray-blue eyes piercing as a cold smirk quirked on her lips. It was me, but then…who was I? I looked down to see that I was in the clothes I had been in when hit by the truck, my other world clothes. I understood now…that was Hikari, and I was Lily. It hadn't been Hikari who had been sucked into the pointless mind game of Konoha…it had been Lily, that part of me that longed for a normal life.

It was strange, my other self – my Hikari self – didn't speak, and neither did I, but there was a channel of questions between us, and I felt the exasperation coming from my other self as she poured out her thoughts. Our thoughts were intermixed, and I began to wake up from my passion-muddled thoughts.

Why was I so pathetically weak? Whose fault was it? Was it mine, for allowing myself to sink into the dramatic role of a heroine willing to sacrifice herself, or was it the fault of Konoha, for sucking me into their little game and their powerful bonds of friendship and love? I was such a fool…in thinking that I belonged in Konoha; I had become the very thing I had grown to despise in Sakura.

I hated myself for doing it, and yet I was glad that it had happened. I knew now that I could not let myself be swayed again. But I would not forget the bonds I made there, I would just distance myself from them, for my own safety. Did I really love Kiba? Yes…but it was not true love. I realized that now as I let my thoughts mull over the times we had shared. It was just a physical attraction that led us to believe that we could function as a couple.

We were compatible, but…too compatible. He never questioned me, never argued with me…never really challenged me. Kiba was a sweet, wild, and fun-loving boy who didn't have a speck of darkness in him. That was all well and good…but it wasn't enough for me. I enjoyed his company, but a part of me would always be somewhat bored.

Naruto, however, was someone who I would miss immensely, but I would be able to put it into proportion. He and I had something deeper than friendship – not romantic, thank god – and something that linked us together, which was weird because he and I were so different.

I would have to avoid him, so that he couldn't have any more of a hold on me. I needed to find myself; I needed time to re-group before facing any of them again.

That was the solution. I would cut off all my feelings for Konoha, and focus on becoming stronger so that I could prove to myself and Sasuke that I was someone to be trusted, not some wishy-washy girl who could be swayed by some charming words and a few kisses. I wouldn't throw away those feelings I felt back in Konoha, but I would use them as something to urge me onward, to show me how low I had gone, and how much worse it could've gotten if I allowed myself to stay.

I felt Hikari growing stronger as my mind cleared, and I began to feel the two of us melt together once more, and I was truly happy for the first time in months. The happiness in Konoha had been off, somewhat, forced in an unconscious way that I can't really put my finger on. I felt like I had to be some bright and overly positive girl in Konoha, which wasn't really me. I wasn't all smiles and candy-canes…I was a kunoichi. I had a darker side that made me feel so incredibly alive that I couldn't live without it. I had hated it up to this point, but now I embraced it. Lily was a forgotten dream, an underlying emotion that was slowly blending in to become one with the kunoichi Hikari.

I would wake up, and not mention my time in Konoha. I would follow Sasuke – not because of romantic feelings, obviously – and prove to him that I was a reliable kunoichi, and I would try and repay the debt I owed to him for being my mentor and protecting me so many times. I would stay by him until he ordered me to leave, and would go without looking back.

I was on track again…I was free.

Light flooded my eyelids, and I scowled as I slowly lifted my hand to cover my eyes, and slowly let my nerves come to life again. I was surprised to find that my chest didn't hurt as much as I expected it to, and slowly pushed myself into a sitting position, feeling a slight twinge in my chest as I looked down. Bandages covered me – so this was twice now that Sasuke had seen my naked upper chest…fantastic – all the way down to my navel, and I breathed in deeply, smiling widely when I found that I could breathe without too much trouble. I felt a hot breeze on my bare skin, and I looked around with a gasp.

I was lying on a bedroll in the middle of a rocky desert, with only a tall bush next to me providing a block of shade. My head swiveled as I searched for someone – maybe this was Hell, and Sasuke had left me to die after all, the bastard! – and I stood up hurriedly, finding that I was in a pair of black training shorts that were skintight, going to mid-thigh, and had no shoes on. I swore as I saw a small pack beside my bedroll, and found that there was a full set of clothes in there. I found a baggy shirt that had elbow-length sleeves, and was a dark blue. I tugged it on, and pulled out some ninja sandals and a kunai and shuriken case. I strapped it to my right thigh, and buckled on the slightly loose sandals with a frown. My hair was down and waving to my wasit and I dug around until I found a hair-band, which I used to pull up my hair into a loose bun.

My throat was parched, and I looked around only to find that there was no water to be found. Well, crap. Whoever had dragged me out here to the desert had packed me a shirt, shoes, kunai and shuriken case, a hair-band, but had somehow forgotten to leave me water. Maybe this was Hell…and I would be forever thirsty, but unable to find water.

That would suck.

But just as I thought that, two figures teleported behind me, and I recognized one of them with a sigh.

So Sasuke had saved me. That's a relief…but who was this other guy with him?

I braced myself, flipping out a kunai as I studied this new arrival. He was extremely pale, with white hair – only he was like, eighteen at the oldest – and pale purple eyes that were mischievous and slightly sadistic as they took me in. There was a huge, rectangular sword strapped onto his back that looked incredibly heavy. I wonder how he lifted it with those skinny arms of his.

The boy was a few inches taller than Sasuke and I, and his arms were as pale and lean as the rest of him. His equally pale lips were parted, and I saw with a jolt of shock that his teeth were filed down to deadly points. Creepy much?

The newcomer looked me up and down, and snorted. "She's too pretty to be a real kunoichi, Sasuke. Why'd you bring her along? Unless she's like, eye-candy for you or something…"

I growled, and used a bit of my chakra to leap at him, so fast that he was scrambling backward as I slashed at him. The boy ducked my fist, but too slow, because my other fist slammed into his gut. My chest ached a bit, but it felt good to really attack someone again…not those wimpy spars back at Konoha.

I whipped my leg around so that it smashed against his face, which melted into a blob of water. I was so shocked that I backed up a step, and watched with wide eyes as the boy's head reformed almost instantly, and I yelled at his wide grin of excitement.

"Point taken. Uh…what's her name?"

I huffed as Sasuke smirked slightly, and I put a hand on my hip in irritation. "I'm not his servant, stupid, so you can talk to me. My name's Hikari."

"I'm Suigetsu, beautiful."

I snorted. "Okay Shark-boy, none of that. As flattered as I probably should be right now, let's just keep it at Hikari…nothing more, nothing less."

"Fine, fine…whatever." Suigetsu smirked, and I rolled my eyes. He reminded me of a darker Kiba, and I was sort of glad that Sasuke brought him along. Suigetsu would be a hell of a lot better company than just Sasuke.

Sasuke was rolling up the mats, and he put them into the bag before hiding them back under the bush. I frowned, and Suigetsu made his way over beside me, sipping at a huge bottle of water.

"Wait, you didn't bring that?"

"No." I waited for him to elaborate, but was met with the usual silence.

I sighed, and looked to Suigetsu. "Can you explain? I'm not in the mood for his one syllable answers…"

"This is a marking point for the way to the eastern containment base of Sound. Sasuke says that there are two more people that he needs to collect for his team, and then we'll start hunting down Sasuke's brother."

"Wait," I asked, running to catch up with Sasuke, who had already started walking towards a dark speck in the horizon. "why did you save me, Sasuke, if you were already planning to recruit three other members? Please, don't give me that look. I know I've been pretty pathetic lately, but I'm back on track now."

Sasuke stared at me with deadpan eyes, and after a moment glanced up at a hawk that was circling the sky with its majestic wings outstretched.

"I don't have to explain myself to you." Déjà vu much? I blinked as he continued. "I saved you because you've proven yourself useful to my cause, nothing more, Hikari."

And with that, he strode around me, the sleeve of his white robe brushing against my arm as he went. I sighed as I stared at his back, biting my lip. I knew that Sasuke was being unusually brusque because Suigetsu, and a part of me was a bit sad that that part of Sasuke I had discovered in those long hours of training together was now shut off to me.

Suigetsu bumped me with his hip, and smiled widely as I glared at him. "C'mon, cutie, let's go."

"Ugh, enough already!" I scowled, and moved up so that I was walking beside Sasuke, close enough so that our arms were almost touching. Sasuke glanced over at me, and I smiled slightly at him before returning my gaze to the base far in the distance.

"Let me guess…one of these new members is a girl?"

"Yes. Her name is Karin, and she has extraordinary healing abilities."

I smiled slightly, and Sasuke's brow rose slowly in silent question.

"Just think about it, Emo-boy. What is the reaction of every single girl – except for me, of course – when they are around you for any length of time?"

Sasuke didn't answer, and Suigetsu snorted in amusement as he moved so he was walking next to me, his arms swinging freely at his sides.

"I can only imagine…Oh Sasuke, let me spike up your hair! Oh, you need your feet cleaned? Let me do it, please! Your ego needs swelling, oh let me just compliment you till it's nice and big. Dear god that's gonna be embarrassing…"

I started laughing, and Suigetsu and Sasuke both looked at me with raised brows as I leaned on Sasuke's shoulder for support, my arms folded near his neck and my head leaning against his shoulder as my shoulders shook.

"You have…no idea how wrong that last bit sounded…compliment him till he's nice and big." I started laughing all over again, and Sasuke rolled his eyes as Suigetsu snorted.

"My, my…I didn't peg you as the type to pervert everything anyone says into something sexual…"

I laughed even harder, and I couldn't help but notice that Sasuke didn't shrug me off, and even slowed his pace so that we were in step with one another. But heck, he probably was either too lazy or is just that emotionless. It wasn't anything personal, obviously, but I had to admit that it felt really natural to lean my head against his shoulder, holding his sleeve for support as I tried to stop laughing.

We reached the base, and I held Suigetsu's face away with one hand as I took a few long sips of his water. I had quizzed the water-based ninja all about his…water stuff on the way here, and had found out that he was made out of water, which explained why he could melt when attacked, and if he didn't constantly hydrate he would die. But really, he didn't need to be such a baby about it…I was only taking a few sips.

I tossed the bottle back to the whining ninja beside me, and made my way up to where Sasuke was standing. "So Karin is here?"

"Yes."

"So, how's this gonna go? Are you just going to whip out your charming side that I haven't had the pleasure of witnessing before now, and ask her politely to come with you?"

"Charming side?"

I shook my head, clapping him lightly on the shoulder as I made my way towards the entrance of the base. "Oh yeah, I forgot. You don't even need charm. Just pull this on them," I turned to give Sasuke a deadpan stare, pretending to flip back my hair attractively. "and they'll be putty in your hands. Girls seem to go crazy for the I-don't-give-a-damn-because-I'm-too-badass look these days…"

"You included?" Suigetsu said jokingly, and I kicked a rock at him.

"No! I'm obviously a new species developed in the lab, a lab run by perfectly average boys who want girls to actually notice them. My registration name was Sane-Girl 2000, and then I escaped because they all tried to have their way with me because I was the only normal girl within two-thousand miles – hence the name Sane-Girl 2000."

There was complete silence as Sasuke and Suigetsu stared at me, and I shuffled my feet and glared at them.

"What?"

Suigetsu snorted. "Is she like this all the time?"

I really wanted Sasuke to pull his silent mode, but of course he chooses now of all times to be Mr. Chatterbox.

"Pretty much. You get used to it after a while…I like to think of it as free entertainment…"

And with that, he made his way towards the doors. Suigetsu smirked, poking me in the forehead as he passed. "Entertain away, Sane-Girl 2000…"

"Oh, you are so not calling me that Shark-boy…"

"Shark-boy? That's the best you can come up with?"

"Ugh, I'm going to be the mature one and end this discussion right now…" I muttered, turning my head away from him and watching as Sasuke tried to open the doors, only to find that they were locked shut. His dark eyes glanced back at Suigetsu, and the white haired boy sighed as he moved forward. Sasuke and I took a step back as Suigetsu's arms grew muscular as he hefted his huge sword. The boy grinned evilly as he used the blade to slash open the door, and Sasuke didn't even pause to thank him before walking almost silently into the base. I patted Suigetsu's shoulder in thanks, and he smiled suggestively.

"Already to the friendly physical contact stage, are we? So by, let's say tomorrow afternoon, we'll be kissing?"

I snorted. "You got that much from a simple pat on the shoulder? Wow…that must get you a lot of dates…"

"Some girls find it attractive."

"Oh do they now…"

Sasuke's shoulders were tight as I replied, and the both of us flinched at the wave of chakra pulsing from the Uchiha. It was almost crushing, and I made cutting motions across my throat frantically to keep Suigetsu from continuing. We both smiled innocently as Sasuke turned to glare in irritation.

"Stop being idiots and search for Karin."

"Yes sir." I mumbled, following after the Uchiha. Suigetsu snorted, but thankfully kept his mouth shut as we walked down the shadowy hallway. I rubbed my arms as the temperature dropped suddenly, and realized that the ground was slowly sloping downwards. I glanced at Suigetsu, who had noticed it as well, and we both tensed as sounds were heard, echoing eerily and making my skin crawl.

It was the sound that I had heard only once, and that was in Kabuto's holding area for his test subjects. The sound of people crying and screaming for salvation, the sound of dying and of pain.

I felt my stomach clenching as I automatically moved closer to Suigetsu, because I wanted confirmation there was still warmth, there was still sanity. He didn't make any smart remarks as I expected him to, and I assume that he sensed my discomfort.

Sasuke was proud and unafraid as we entered the hallway that had cages lining it, and I had to close my eyes as I saw a glimpse of an old man clinging to the bars, screaming and crying, his eyes yellow with sickness and his mouth foaming as he yelled and sobbed at the same time.

I was close enough so that the arms stretching out towards us couldn't reach, but it was close enough so that I could see every scar, every wound on their bony fingers.

Their voices were a underlying hum of pain, and I could pick out individual words as we passed.

"Uchiha…Lord Orochimaru…dead?"

"Who…liberate us?"

"Sasuke Uchiha…power…"

And then their voices were blocked out as we entered another hallway, and the thick walls around us blocked out all their screams and pleas. I let out a shaky sigh, and Sasuke's dark eyes were on me for a moment before a loud and obnoxious voice called out.

"So it's true…you've killed Orochimaru."

I looked around Sasuke's shoulder to see a slender girl standing there, not much older than us, with a sneer on her narrow face. Karin was attractive, in a haughty sort of way, with her long, spiky red hair and her vivid red eyes that were captivating and slightly unnerving at the same time. She was wearing a long sleeved pale lavender shirt that split off when reaching her navel and cutting off altogether so that a few inches of her midriff were visible. Her short shorts were black, and she wore ninja sandals with thin black stockings that went up to mid-thigh.

Karin turned without a word, and led us down the hallway for a few moments, and then into a small room. There was a bench on the opposite wall, and we all filed inside. Karin shut the door behind us, and Sasuke and Suigetsu moved to sit on the bench, while I leaned against the wall beside the bench, staring with curiosity at the look of loathing that Karin gave me. Jeez, I hadn't even said anything yet, and she's already gone and made us supposed rivals. Ugh…

"What do you guys want? I heard that you defeated Orochimaru, but I would have assumed that you'd go and…you know…"

At least she was smart enough not to mention Itachi's name…that would've been a big no-no.

Sasuke's expression didn't change, and he suddenly turned to Suigetsu and I. "Go and free the prisoners."

Karin spoke the same time that I did; only our intentions were completely different.

"Hey, this base is under my authority, and those prisoners were put under my–"

"Are you crazy, Emo-boy? If you let those prisoners go free without any support they'll die out in the desert, and there's n–"

Sasuke sighed, and held up a hand. "The prisoners are no longer necessary, seeing as Orochimaru no longer has any authority over Sound. And there's a oasis village a few miles past this base, they'll be able to find shelter and food there."

I nodded, and smirked at Karin's furious face. Suigetsu and I made our way towards the door, and I almost gagged at the flush of shyness that flashed across Karin's face, and her eyes trailed up and down his body without shame as he sat there watching us leave.

I was about to close the door behind us, but I poked my head back in and cleared my throat.

"Um, sorry to bother you love-birds, but just wanted to introduce myself. Hey Karin, my name's Hikari." I made to leave, but then I remembered something, and poked my head back in, only to find that Karin had taken her glasses off. I grinned, and cleared my throat once more to get their attention. Sasuke closed his eyes in exasperation. Karin looked ready to tear out my heart as I spoke.

"And, if you don't mind, please don't rape Sasuke. I mean, he's very easily traumatized by anything remotely sexual, and if someone of your…uh…stature, were to try and engage in sexual intercourse, that would pose a bit of an issue with my innocence, seeing as I don't really want to have to picture you and Sasuke–"

"Enough, Hikari." Sasuke barked, and I gave Karin a sweet smile before closing the door and walking down the hallway with Suigetsu. The water ninja was staring at me with blank eyes, and I shrugged.

"Someone had to warn her, and I doubt you were going to step in…"

"You…" Suigetsu trailed off as I turned to raise an eyebrow at him. "…are so incredibly strange, I'm not even going to try and put it into words."

I grinned at him. "I'll take it as a compliment."