Chapter 17

On their last night in West Palm Beach the group gathered around a big bonfire on the beach. Laughing and telling stories, Jenna had helped Alaric and Kol finish a couple bottles of vodka. Seeing the smiles on people's faces was something that at the beginning on this trip seemed so unlikely. They spent so much of the start of this trip fighting over where they were going, how to get there and the crappy van that ended up breaking down before they could reach their destination. Now things seemed so much better with the group as they huddled around the fire to enjoy their final night of spring break.

Kol and Bonnie got up to dance around the fire as they all laughed and then Kol reached for Elena's hand to spin her around and make a smile creep across her face.

"Did you know they have a beach volleyball tournament down here" Alaric said in a drunken slur. "It was so fascinating, ladies you should started a team"

"Is that why you guys took so long to come back from the beach this afternoon? You all got hypnotized by the bikini beach volleyball?" Jenna asked with a giggle as she was snuggled in close to Alaric and resting her head on his shoulders.

"Bikinis? Did you guys notice any bikinis?" Ric asked as he tried to play dump as if that had nothing to do with why he was late.

"It was educational, we learned the rules of beach volleyball" Kol chirped with a smile.

"I'm sure," Bonnie said as she rolled her eyes.

"It's true, Kol got front row seats for a woman's anatomy lesson" Damon teased with smirk and then watched as Kol's eyes widen as the secret was revealed and Bonnie was laughing and freaking out at him.

"I KNEW IT!" Bonnie laughed. Everyone else around the bon fire was laughing hysterically as poor Kol was getting thrown to the sharks. Elena was sitting across from Damon and found herself laughing and even making a bit of eye contact with him before turning back to Kol and Bonnie.

"It's not like it sounds, I barely saw anything" Kol tried to lie. "DAMON!" Kol growled while everyone else laughed.

"Come on how much did you see?" Bonnie asked as she put Kol on the spot.

"It was nothing, small hardly anything, okay it was a boob," Kol said as he rolled his eyes. "It wasn't a very supported bikini top," he added with a laugh. Bonnie's jaw dropped and she pretended to be all shocked and mad at her boyfriend who obviously didn't do anything on purpose. Stefan and Damon sat there laughing, as Kol seemed to have dug himself a hole even deeper.

"Somebody's in trouble" Caroline teased as she watched the cute interaction between Kol and Bonnie as they hugged and flirted with each other.

"God you guys are so mushy, I need another drink" Elena said as she got up from her seat so she could head back up to the house and get some more drinks.

"I'll come with you" Caroline stated as she got up from her spot and followed behind Elena as they headed up to the house. The girls walked up to the house in silence and as they reached the back door Elena swung it opened and headed for the bar. "Not sure what we haven't drank yet," Elena said a she searched for drinks.

"Look we can have ten year old tequila" Caroline responded.

"No thank you" Elena laughed.

"Probably a safe decision" Caroline giggled as she leaned over the bar as Elena rummaged underneath.

"God I think we have some alcoholics among us," Elena said a she found bottle after bottle empty.

"Well this is a Salvatore beach house, I know of at least one" Caroline stated.

"Damon's not an alcoholic, he's not even drinking tonight" Elena stated as she stood up when she found half a bottle of vodka.

"Yeah there is a shocker," Caroline stated.

"Come on let's go" Elena told her not wanting to discuss it anymore.

Caroline was standing there watching Elena getting ready to go back and join the others but as she bit her lip Caroline knew this might be the only time she would be able to talk to Elena alone. Since her kiss with Stefan, Caroline had been beating herself up over it because he was her best friend's ex boyfriend. There was a girl code where you didn't hook up with your best friend's ex and even though she never slept with Stefan she did go so far as to make out with him down on that beach that night. "Elena wait!" Caroline called back.

Whipping her head back around Elena looked at Caroline with a puzzling look as she wondered what was going on and why Caroline looked so guilty. Actually over the past two days Caroline hadn't really said much to her and instead seemed to be avoiding her. It didn't really bother Elena that much considering that when Caroline was around her it usually involved her preaching about how she was should be with Stefan. Now as Elena looked at Caroline she could see that something was definitely up, she looked guilty and like she had been hiding something from her that she need to get off her chest now. "What is it Caroline?" Elena asked as she set the bottle of vodka down on the table and stared at her friend and giving Caroline her full attention.

Nervously Caroline started to play with her curly blonde hair and started chewing on her lip as she tried to find the words to say. The silence was starting to make Elena nervous as she watched Caroline contemplating what she was going to say next. "What's going on?"

"You know I love you right, that you are my best friend and I would never do anything to break that trust you have with me right?" Caroline said as her eyes looked at Elena full of guilt. "You are my best friend and the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you" she added.

"Yes I know" Elena said still not sure where this was all going.

"I kissed Stefan" Caroline blurted out in the mist of tears falling down her face as she watched Elena's face go from confusion to shock and then anger.

"You kissed…"

"I'm so sorry we were both drunk and I know that is no excuse but Elena please you need to believe me" Caroline said as she started blabbering on.

"I can't believe this," Elena said as she looked away from her friend and started to process everything. "So what you make me look like the bad guy for breaking up with Stefan because he is suppose to be my epic love and less then a week you are kissing him?"

"I know I'm a terrible person and what I did was wrong," Caroline said.

Elena brushed her straight long hair back as she turned away from Caroline as she processed everything. This whole week Caroline had been a Stelena cheerleader and doing everything to get her to get back together with Stefan but turns around and kisses him. "Does this mean you will stop nagging me?" Elena asked as she looked at her friend who was doing her best not to break down and cry.

"What?"

"Will you get off my back?" Elena asked. She hated everyone especially Caroline piling on the guilt when it came to her and Damon or her and Stefan. They all had no problem reminding her of what she had done no matter how many times she had told them she got it. Sure she was mad at Caroline for kissing Stefan but at the same time he was her ex, she broke up wit him for a reason and now didn't get a say in who he kissed.

"So your not mad?"

"Yeah I'm mad Caroline but I want you to stop nagging me about Stefan and now clearly you can't think you can talk me into getting back together with Stefan now" Elena told her doing her best not to start a big fight with her. "Look I'm going back outside" Elena told her as picked up the vodka and made her way over to the back door and pushed it open.

"Elena!" Caroline called back to her but Elena just ignored her and continued down the beach and over to the bonfire.

Elena stormed down to the beach in huff with alcohol in hand, and with every step her anger for Caroline grew even more and to the point where she really didn't want to be around everyone anyway. As she reached the bonfire she sat on the far side and away from everyone as she gulped back some vodka and 7Up and staying silent from the rest of the group.

"You okay?" Jenna asked as she was snuggled beside Ric but was watching her niece from across the bonfire.

"Yeah I'm fine" Elena answered as she took another drink and didn't make eye contact with anyone else in the group. Damon was staring at her and by watching saw that something was obviously bothering her and while he wanted to hold her and comfort her, he couldn't without hurting his brother who was sitting just a few feet away. Stefan was also staring at her and could see that something in her face expression had changed since she had come back from the beach house. Looking back he didn't see Caroline coming back from the beach house yet and his mind started to rapidly think about how maybe Caroline had told Elena what had happened between them.

"I think we are going to call it a night," Bonnie said as she linked her hand with Kol's while they stood up from the circle around the bonfire. Bonnie gave a yawn to make it seem like she was tired but to everyone sitting around the fire it wasn't hard to see the giddy smiles on her and Kol's faces showed that sleeping was far from their minds.

Everyone said goodnight to them as the two scurried towards the beach house and letting the others know it would probably be best if they stayed away from beach house for a while. As they took off Damon was poking a stick at the fire to make it grow a bit more as the others sat there silently.

"I can't believe this week is pretty much over" Jenna said with a sigh as she rested her head on Ric's shoulder. This trip hadn't really been one of relaxing on the beach and sun tanning as they had hoped but it was definitely an interesting one. The last couple of days had been more to what they had wanted from the trip as they tanned on the beach, played in the waves and partied and drank at the local beach bars with a number of other spring breakers.

Things between Jenna and Alaric had been going really well as they had been inseparable from each other for the last couple of days. Alaric had finally gave up on Meredith as the two were not trying that hard to get together and figured that maybe things were better left as just being a internet relationship that was never going to go anywhere. So Jenna and Alaric were able to give into the feelings that they had never really explored. Jenna couldn't remember the last time she was this happy with someone even Logan, everything about Alaric was what Jenna wanted in a partner and they started off as great friends first.

"Hey where's Caroline?" Stefan asked as he looked around and didn't see her coming back from the beach house yet.

"Maybe you should go and see?" Elena snapped at him and her tone gave Stefan then confirmation that she did know about what happened between him and Caroline. As much as he didn't want Elena to find out he also hoped she would and maybe be a little jealous about it.

Elena and Stefan made eye contact for a moment before Elena looked away and started digging her feet into the dirt on the ground. Everyone else in in the circle including Damon took notice of the look between Stefan and Elena that seemed to show that silently they both knew what the other was thinking about and it is wasn't anything good.

Without saying anything Stefan got up from his seat and started to make his way towards the beach house in search of Caroline. It was obvious that Elena knew what had happened but the question was how much did she know and what exactly had Caroline told her. He need to know what both of them had said and what Elena was thinking but given the strain of their relationship right now talking to Elena wasn't much of an option. Elena didn't even bother to look at him as he left and instead kept her gaze on the fire in the center of the circle.

"What's going on?" Jenna asked as she looked over at Elena after noticing the tension between her and Stefan. Sure the two had just broken up a week ago but they had been pretty silent towards each other but now something had changed between them.

"Nothing everything is fine" Elena told her with a forced smile but no one sitting around the fire believed her.

"Well we have an early flight tomorrow so I think we should call it a night" Alaric told the remaining people sitting around the fire but neither Damon nor Elena moved or made any response to his comment.

"Have a goodnight," Jenna said to both Damon and Elena although she was staring at Elena but never got a response from her. She knew something was bothering her niece but Elena didn't seem to want to talk about it no matter how she tried to get her to talk to her. Hand in hand as Alaric and Jenna left the bonfire and this left Damon and Elena sitting on opposite side of each other but acting as if the other wasn't there.

The two stayed in silence for a good ten minutes not saying a word to each other or even looked at each other. It was obvious that both wanted to say something to the other but at the same time they knew what would happen if they both gave in. Without a word Damon got up from his seat around the bonfire and started to walk away without even a glance or a word to Elena. She hated it; she hated how their relationship had changed so sudden. Before this trip they bickered over everything, they teased each other and knew just how to press each other's buttons. When they came on this trip that side of them didn't go away but there was a new attraction to each other, a passion and connection they started to explore. Now there was nothing, they didn't talk, joke around, and didn't tease each other or nothing. They were like strangers now afraid to get close to each other in the event their actions could hurt Stefan.

She watched Damon headed up the beach towards the house and she felt the anger growing inside of her. Why was everyone else able to be happy and be with the one they wanted but her and Damon were forced to stay away from each other. How did things between them change so drastically to the point where they couldn't be alone together? She was so tired of watching everyone else work towards their happy ending and yet she was forced to be miserable for the rest of this trip. After putting the fire out Elena chanced after Damon up to the beach house with a determination to let out all her frustration she had been holding in for days.

Following him into the beach house she let the back door slam on her way in and didn't seem to care whom it woke up. "Is this how it is going to be from now on?" Elena snapped at him as Damon stood in the center of the room and was turning around to stare at her. She was on the verge of tears but doing everything to hold back as she was finally going to get things off her chest. "You know out of everyone I always expected things with you wouldn't get awkward," Elena told him.

"Elena…" Damon said with a sad sigh.

"NO!" Elena yelled in anger. "When my parents died and I was that poor little orphan girl everyone tip toed around and acted like I was some helpless flower. Every time they looked at me all I saw was how sad they felt for me, but you Damon you didn't change and when we talked or teased each other it was the only time I was able to get my mind off what was going on" Elena told him and she watched as Damon too remembered how he helped her deal with the death of her parents.

They had known each other since they would play in the sandbox together, or more like Damon running through her sand castles. No even as children they bickered and did what they could to get on the others nerves. When they were young Elena was the little girl with cudies who always followed the boys around whether they wanted her there or not. Yet cudies or not the Salvatore boys and even her little brother Jeremy would stand up for her if anyone other then them made her cry.

"Its not fair" Elena cried as the tears started to stream down her face. There was still a big gap between the two of them and as Damon saw Elena wrap her arms around herself he wanted nothing more then to pull her into his arms and assure her everything would be okay. "Why does everyone else get to be happy? Jenna and Alaric, Bonnie and Kol, god even Stefan and Caroline are hooking up" Elena yelled in between her tears.

"What?"

"And you know what I don't care!" she told him as she didn't answered him and just wiped away her tears from her cheek. "I got no hold of Stefan anymore so he is free to do what he wants but why do I have to feel so guilty about what I want then?" she asked him but Damon just looked away from her.

"I was happy, I was truly happy for the first time in a long time the night we were together" She explained. "Its just not fair" she cried uncontrollably and brought her hands up to cover her face as she broke down.

Not being able to stand there anymore Damon closed the gap between them in the living room and wrapped his arms around her tightly. She cries got louder as her face buried into his chest while she clung to him. She was crying so hard that her body was shaking against his body. It was not fair how things were turning out and how everyone else seemed to be heading towards a happy ending but not her and Damon.

"None of this is fair" Elena cried.

"I know" Damon whispered in her ear as he brushed her hair down her back while she was still clinging to him. He hated to see her cry, especially when there was nothing he could do for her. Pulling his head back a little he cupped her face and then gently leaned in to press his lips against hers. At the first touch of their lips the desire between them heated up with huge sparks and their passion grew more and more. The kiss was so desperate and one that the needed to make up for days without being able to touch and explore the other's mouth. They didn't even want to come up for air as they clung to each other and tried to make up for lost time.

Elena's hands came up to run through Damon's hair while his hands slowly moved down her body and pulled her as close to his body as he could. They were so hungry for this kiss and nothing else seemed to matter at this point, they just wanted time to stop and allow them to have this moment of weakness and desire. The kiss was so incredibly and it seemed that the longer they went without tasting each other the better and more desperate the kisses got.

Yet as the guilt started to seep in, Damon pulled away and let out a tired and sad sigh. His forehead rested against hers as the two caught their breath. The reality sunk in about what they were doing and both knew they had to stop. "We can't, he's my brother" Damon told her painfully. They couldn't do this; they couldn't let this happen every time they were alone together.

"I know" Elena responded with watery eyes as her forehead rested against his as she felt his fingers running through her hair.

After a long sigh, Damon gave her one last kiss on the forehead, "I can't, we can't" he whispered and then pulled away from her before she could say anything else. He left her there standing in the middle of the room as he stormed out of the house as quickly as possible without looking back at her. This left Elena alone as she burst into tears realizing that what ever she felt for Damon was never going to be able to be given the chance to grow. She fell to her knees and curled into a ball on the floor with her face buried in her hands.

Her cries didn't stop and while most people in the house were fast asleep right now and unaware of what was going on, one person wasn't. While Damon and Elena stormed into house so consumed in their own problems that they didn't' take a good look at their surroundings because this whole time Stefan was hiding in the kitchen. He had made his way to the kitchen when he needed a drink of water and as he was closing the fridge he saw Elena coming storming in after Damon obviously upset about something. He was about to step out and let them know he was there but he could see Elena was crying and her conversation with Damon was heated. So he stayed quiet and listened as his brother and his ex girlfriend let out their frustration.

When Damon stormed out of the house Elena was left crying uncontrollably on the floor looking so heart broken. He had never seen this side of Elena before as she cried on the floor after Damon had left. It was obvious to him now that she had deep feeling for his brother and that it wasn't just about sex. The way they were together was so different then how things were with him and Elena. Staying silent Stefan watched as Elena wiped away her tears and then got back onto her feet and made her way to the bedroom.

Biting his bottom lip Stefan stepped out of the shadows and tried to understand everything he had seen. The pain on Elena's face broke his heart because he knew he was the reason for it. He looked towards the closed bedroom door and he contemplated going to see if Elena was alright and try and offer some comfort, but before he could take another step towards the bedroom door he heard a bang coming from outside. His head spun around towards the front door that Damon had ran out of just minutes ago and wondered what was going on. Walking out the front door he saw the light on in the shed next to the house and quietly Stefan made walked towards the light and then peaked his head into the shed and saw his brother standing still with his back to him.

He had his hands on the top of his head, as he seemed to be trying to control his frustration. He was breathing heavily and fallen firewood logs were scattered on the ground around him, which explained the bang. Stefan watched as his brother seemed so be so troubled and he too was fighting his feelings he had for Elena. He walked away from her because of him and Stefan started to really hate himself for causing two people he cared about so much pain. The frustration became too much for Damon again and he started kicking and knocking the tower of firewood over from where it sat in the back of the shed. Knocking them over he didn't seem to care how much noise he made or who he woke up. He was so angry at the situation and having to let Elena, go.

Seeing his brother like this was so foreign to Stefan because for years Damon didn't let anyone get close to him. He was a womanizer and for a long time that was the kind of life he wanted. It was one without feelings, one where he was in control and decided when things came to an end with a woman. This side of Damon was so different and it was now becoming so obvious to Stefan as he watched his heartbroken brother. It was becoming clear to Stefan as he watched his brother, he and Elena weren't just fooling around; they were in love.

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