AN:/Hey guys, sorry for not updating sooner, I honestly have no excuse other than the fact that I really don't like this chapter. I don't know, I guess I'm having Writer's Block...
I hope you enjoy it anyway, it is a lot longer than previous chapters!:D

"Where is he? Said Lily immediately.
Remus looked up. "Down by the lake."
Lily stepped back towards the exit. "I have to see him." Sirius stood up. "No!" He choked. "If he doesn't want to talk to me, he won't want to see you!"

Lily knew he was upset, but his harsh tone annoyed her.
"If he doesn't want to talk he can tell me himself."
Without another word Lily swung the portrait open and left, making her way to the entrance of the castle.

As she went, Lily let the news sink in. She really didn't know very much, hadn't stayed long enough for her friends to actually tell her.
But what she did know was how horrible she had been, how self absorbed and completely selfish. Not 10 minutes ago she had been internally cursing James Potter. And for what reason? Because he hadn't come to see her in the Hospital Wing?
Big deal.
His parents were dead. Gone.
Although no one knew what she had been thinking, Lily still felt endlessly guilty.
He was an only child, though everybody knew that the Potter's had practically adopted Sirius Black into the family. No wonder Sirius seemed so heart broken, he had lost his parents today too.
She also knew that the McKinnon's had been best friends with the Potter family, and that Marlene had seen them every week for as long as she could remember. James and her and grown up side by side.

Lily stopped just outside the doors. Should she really see him? Or just leave him be, as he probably wished. She could hardly tell him she understood, that would just be insulting seeing as she got daily letters from her own parents.
So what would she say?
Lily thought about if their positions were reversed, if it was she down by the lake. She could imagine James speaking with her, helping her…
She continued down the path.

The air was chilly outside and Lily drew her robes around her. The air was unusually windless, the leaves barely shuffling along the ground.
A lone figure was standing at the edge of the lake, throwing stones into the murky depth. James.
When Lily got close enough, he heard her and turned. For a moment they were frozen, staring. Then Lily closed the distance and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. His head drooped onto her and he was breathing heavily. Lily said nothing, unable to find any type of words suitable.

After a while, they sat beneath the oak tree, Lily's head on James's shoulder.
"I had this feeling," Said James. "When they didn't return from the mission on time, I knew something was wrong…I knew it." He breathed out shakily. Lily looked up at him and saw his bottom lip quivering.
"James, you don't have to talk about it."
He shook his head. "The Divination teacher, she warned me…told me. She, she knew that something was about to go wrong and what did Sirius and I do? Call her crazy, insane. Well, she was right. My parents are dead!"
Lily looked down into her lap.
"I don't know how you're feeling, James." He looked over, startled. "I'm not going to lie to you, I've never lost anyone I really care about. I'm not going to be one of those people who pretend they know what you're going though, what's going on in your head." She shrugged. "Because I don't."

She looked over at him and saw his lip quirked slightly.
"Lily Evans. You would be the one person who refuses to treat me any different. You know why I came down here? Couldn't handle the stares, the looks of pity. I've had at least 15 people come up to me already and tell me they were 'sorry for my loss.' But they don't care, not didn't know my mum, how she would return from work exhausted and somehow still make the time to bake the best chocolate cookies you've ever tasted. And my dad...who, who always could make me feel better by telling one of his rubbish jokes."
"I'm sorry," She began. "I'm sorry that I never met Mr and Mrs Potter."
James smiled.

They sat in silence for another while, watching the Giant Squid blow soft bubbles over the surface of the lake.
"Things are changing, Lily." Said James.
"What do you mean?"
"Two years ago, a murder in the Wizarding world was unheard of. Now? They're weekly. And it's all down to him."
Lily nodded weakly. "Voldemort."
James laughed. "At least you and I aren't afraid of him. Did you know everyone is calling him 'He who must not be named'? Pathetic."
Lily shivered; it really was cold.
"Don't you feel angry?" She said.
"Oh, I'm bloody furious. And I will make sure he is defeated, someday. If it's the last thing I do I won't let him near anyone I love ever again."
Lily looked up and saw the fierce heat set into his eyes and she knew that James meant every word he said

The sun was setting by the time James and Lily returned to the castle. They walked up to the doors hand in hand, keeping close to block out the harsh weather.
"We've missed dinner." Said Lily.
"Sorry, you should of said-"
"No," Lily smiled. "Not hungry anyway."
The pair continued up to the common room, though they let go of each other to avoid any more unwanted stares.
When they entered the room, Sirius jumped out of his seat by the fire and rushed over. He looked at the two, staring particularly at Lily.
Feeling like she was intruding, Lily said goodbye made her way over to the girls.

"Hey." She said carefully.
"Alright?" Alice smiled, patting the empty space. Lily sat down.
She looked over at Marlene who was staring at a random spot near the fire.
"Mar?" The girl looked up. "Are you okay?"
Marlene nodded and pushed her hair back from her face. "I will be."
Then Lily turned to Hestia, who looked unsure about what to do.
"Hestia…I am sorry."
Hestia shrugged. "I still don't know why you did it…but I can't believe what Amos did to you."
Lily bit her lip. Could she tell them? Or would Amos still tell everyone? But she could never tell them the full story anyway without them finding out about Remus.
"It's a long, long story, and I don't know if I can tell you…but please Hest, know that I was doing it for a reason."
Hestia still looked uncertain, but nodded her head.

James looked at Sirius.
His friend's eyes were red, and James figured his must look pretty much the same.
They walked over to Remus and Peter and sat. The atmosphere was tense, something that the Marauders had never experienced ever.
"I'm sorry about your mum and dad, James." Peter said.
James couldn't help but smile, thinking of what Lily had said. "Thanks Pete."
Remus shifted his feet about awkwardly.
"James I-"
"It's alright Moony, we're alright."
Remus frowned.

"Mate, you need to stop this."
Remus shook his head. "I don't know-"
"You do know, Remus! You've been avoiding me...all of us." He looked around at Peter and Sirius, who nodded solemnly.
"We need you back, Moony."
Maybe Remus was doing it because James's parents had just died, but the boy smiled half-heartedly and nodded.
"Alright…but James,"
He lowered his voice.
"The full moon is tomorrow. If you…If I've…" He sighed. "You know what I mean…"
James pushed his hair back.
"I understand, but Remus, I'll always be there for you. No matter what happens, we're the marauders. And we stick together."
He finished his speech and glanced around to see the other occupants of the common room staring at them. He did suppose it was very unlike the marauders to be…sensitive.
James stood his ground, staring back at a couple of older boys. Eventually they looked away, as did the others. Conversation resumed.
James turned around. Sirius sighed dramatically.
"Next time you decide have a little heart to heart talk about our friendship, make sure we're in the privacy of our own dorms. Merlin knows there are already enough rumours about just how close the marauders are."
He grinned and James let out a short laugh.
"Right Pete?" Sirius turned to Peter and winked at him, leaving the poor boy red and flustered.

Lily laughed to herself after hearing James's proclamation. The girls looked at her quizzically.
"Lily?" Alice said. "What is going on with you and James?"
She blushed and looked away.
Which obviously wasn't the right thing to do. All three girls jumped closer, their eyes wild.
"Tell us Lily Evans!"
Lily looked at Marlene, who seemed to have momentarily forgotten about her sadness. Lily bit her lip. It was a distraction for her…didn't she need that? Would it be selfish not to tell them?
Lily scoffed inwardly. What was she even thinking?

Hestia prodded Lily's arm. "Hello? Tell us!"
She sighed and looked over at James, who was laughing at something Sirius had done to Peter.
"Well…when I was in the Hospital Wing after that thing with Amos, he stayed with me the entire time. We talked…" She trailed off, leaving the girls waving their hands.
"C'mon Evans, Merlin!"
That had come from Marlene.
"We talked and...and we just kissed, okay!"
Alice squealed. Marlene and Hestia grinned.
Lily put her head in her hands, hiding her red face. She was very aware that James and the rest of the marauders were sitting a few seats away. She was in a very vulnerable position.
Marlene or Hestia could just walk right over there and-
"Oi, Potter!" Marlene shouted, smiling. James looked up, his eyebrows raised in confusion. "Have something to confess to?" She winked as James blushed, looking over at Lily.

She refused to look up, mortified. But in the back of her mind, she was glad that Marlene was acting like her former self. She supposed it also took James's mind off the grief. But to her it sounded like he hadn't accepted his parent's death yet. He was floating in denial, forcing himself to think of other, less important things...like Lily.

James had turned beetroot, blinking quickly at Marlene. "Don't know what you're talking about." He said back. Sirius and the others looked at him, questioning. He sighed and shrugged.
He felt bad, thinking about Lily Evans.
His parents had been murdered and he was thinking about a girl? That didn't seem right.
But then the familiar voice of Mary Potter chimed in to his thoughts.
'Oh don't waste your life mourning us son. We want you to be happy!'
Then his father.
'Don't be an arse James! Don't let this girl go…'
James sighed.
Hearing dead people in his head?
Bloody hell, he thought, not exactly the best sign.

"I'm heading up." He said to the boys. He could feel a headache coming on and wanted to sleep more than anything.
"Alright," Sirius said, suddenly looking sombre again, as if his sudden hyper rush was ending. "Goodnight."

Lily went to bed late and woke early on Saturday morning. She had two day's extra sleep that meant she didn't even feel a little tired.
Looking at the clock, she saw that it was just past 6.
She dressed in her old jeans and a jumper before leaving the Gryffindor Tower and heading to the Great Hall.
What she found there was extremely strange. There wasn't one single person there. Nobody!
Not even a teacher. The food was all just sitting there, utterly untouched. She supposed it was a Saturday morning and people were tired after a week's worth of classes and early starts.
Lily sat in the middle of the table and grabbed two pieces of toast. She felt foolish, sitting all by herself at such a large table.
It was also silent, so the clanging of her lifting a knife sounded extremely loud.
Each bite Lily took seemed as loud as an earthquake in comparison.

After around 10 minutes a few early risers began drifting in, heading to their own tables; still no Gryffindors though. Two Ravenclaw first years were looking nervous, talking loudly about the essay they had to complete for Potions. A single Hufflepuff boy was absentmindedly stirring his tea, eyes fixed on a book that he had perched up against two empty goblets.
The next person in made Lily turn around abruptly, trying to hide her face. Alas, bright red hair did tend to make her more than conspicuous. She could hear his footsteps hitting off the hard floor as he made his way closer to her. A shadow fell over her and Lily looked up, seeing the face of Amos Diggory staring down at her. He looked uncomfortable.
"I have nothing to say to you." Lily said harshly.
"I'm sorry." Amos said quietly. "I didn't meant to hurt you."
"Well you did!" She snapped, careful to keep her tone hushed. "You stabbed me, did you think I was just going to be okay with that?"
Amos looked down, staring at his feet.
"I'm not a good person." He said. Lily rolled her eyes.
"You think?"
"I…I won't tell anyone about Lupin."
"How considerate of you." Said Lily sourly.
He nodded quickly, stepping back.
"I won't bother you again." He breathed out deeply. "And I am truly sorry Lily."
Lily returned to her toast, ignoring him. She didn't look up until she heard him disappear.

James yawned. He felt unbelievably tired, yet he just couldn't sleep. All of his friends were still sound asleep.
He remembered everything that had happened the previous day; it all seemed so unreal. Were his parents really gone?
Yes.
James nodded to himself. They're gone and they will never be back.
How did he feel?
Nothing. He felt nothing.
What is wrong with me? He thought.
Perhaps it just hadn't hit him yet.
Perhaps it wouldn't hit him for days, weeks.
But he'd seen other people lose parents, and he'd seen them crumble; break down under the grief.
That scared James.
He didn't want to feel those emotions, but it was an obligation, wasn't it?
He supposed he just didn't know how to handle it. How could you possibly prepare for something so unexpected?
James shook his head. You couldn't. No one can.
But you have to get on with it. Live.

James knew that the funeral was in two days, and he knew that he would have to speak at it. He'd have to look at the two wooden boxes, see his parents buried in the ground…
That worried him. How could he cope with that?
Sirius let out a muffled snore and James looked over at his best friend.
That's how he would cope; he'd have Sirius with him. And Remus and Peter.
Standing by his side.

And then when it was over and he'd said goodbye, James promised himself he would move on.
No, he thought, 'moving on' wasn't the right was to put it. You can never really move on from such a thing. They'd always be there in the back of his mind, and the sadness would be there too, trying to barge its way to the forefront, but he'd try his best to keep it at bay.
Because James knew that he had his whole life ahead of him.
He smiled at the thought.