AN:/Fluffiness incoming:')

Lily stood up abruptly, rage firing through her. The girls were all looking at her with pitiful looks, whilst Sirius and Peter looked confused as to why she even looked mad. She clenched her fists; they only knew about the kiss on the train, the time when she had hated James. So he hadn't even told them about the one in the Hospital Wing? Was he too ashamed?
Lily took a step towards the girl's dormitory, but shook her head. She was too angry to just let this go. She needed to see James.
Without looking back Lily rushed over to the stairs and climbed them.
"Potter!" She shouted, voice cracking. She reached the top and saw James push a hand through his hair as he approached the door.
Lily sped up, reaching him. He spun around, and before he even had time to open his mouth Lily slapped him. His head was forced to the side and he swore loudly. Lily stepped back, breathing heavily.
Her hand was aching already.

James looked down at her, his expression hard to analyze.
"What the hell was that?" Said Lily, still short of breath.
James sighed deeply, his head falling.
"I'm sorry," He said quietly.
Lily fired up again. "Sorry?" She forgot for a moment that this boy was still meant to be grieving, consumed in her fury. "Do you know how humiliating that was for me? You asshole!"
He nodded his head.
"Lily, come on, I don't know why I-"
"Neither do I!" She shouted, cutting him off. "Are you too embarrassed? Is that it? You can't admit that you kissed me?" Her voice lowered, showing a certain amount of insecurity.
"If you don't like me, then at least tell me."
James threw his hands up. "Of course I like you Lily! I just…I don't know, okay? I'm so confused!"
Lily's fingernails dug into the skin of her hands.
He continued.
"Everything was going so well, you know? That day in the hospital wing, it was amazing. And then it all went wrong."
Lily bit her lip. It was hard to be angry with him whenever he was in such a bad state. She looked into his eyes and saw tears there.
"I feel terrible, for thinking about you when they're gone! Anytime I feel happy, when I laugh…it's like I'm disgracing them for not crying and being sad."
A tear began to make its way down his face but James wiped it away before it could pass the bridge of his nose.
"And I know that I'm supposed to get on with my life but I can't! I thought I could cope with this, Lily. But I can't. And I'm sorry."
Lily looked down at her feet.
"I shouldn't have slapped you." She said quietly. "I was just angry and I-"
"It's okay." Said James, his voice was empty.

"The funeral, it's tomorrow." He said slowly. "And I don't want to go."
Lily's eyes shot up.
"What? James of course you have to go."
He nodded his head.
"I know, but I'm afraid…I don't want to see them, I don't want to see my family. I don't want to talk about where Sirius and I will be living from now on, because I'm scared."
He started shaking, trying to hold in the emotions. Lily had known that this was going to happen. He'd passed the stage of denial and now finally he was cracking. Unable to help it, she pulled him into a hug. She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes.
"It's going to be alright." She whispered softly into his ear.
Lily could feel his tears falling onto her shoulder and seeping through her t-shirt.

After a few minutes, James stopped crying. His breathing returned to normal though when he pulled back slightly, Lily saw that his eyes were red behind his glasses.
"I'm terrified Lily." He admitted. "Of the future. Merlin…of Christmas," He gulped. "My first Christmas without them."
He breathed in shakily.
"You won't be alone." Said Lily. "Sirius will be with you, and if you're staying at school…I could too."
He shook his head. "No, you need to be with your family Lil's."
Lily shrugged. "Christmas is months away. Who knows what will have happened by then."

James put his head back on Lily's shoulder and pulled her in again. Absentmindedly, she began to touch the bottom of his hair, twirling the ends between her fingers. He shivered.
Slowly, James raised his head and looked at her. Lily moved her hands from his hair and steadied them on his arms.
Her eyes were caught in his, a deep hazel colour magnified by his glasses.
"What happened with you and Amos?" He said suddenly. Lily froze, her arms falling to her sides. She had not expected him to ask that question.
"What do you mean?" She said briskly.
"Why did you go out with him?"
Lily cast her eyes down but James caught her face in his hands and tilted it back up.
"Lily?"
She sighed.

"That night when Amos and I snuck into Remus's house…"
"Yeah."
"Well, he wanted to go over there because he heard screaming…h-he'd been told by others that Remus was a werewolf, and thought that he would find out if the rumours were true. I tried to stop him James, I did." Lily felt herself tear up and swallowed.
"He didn't see Remus transform, but he knew. He figured it out for himself. And, and he told me that he'd tell everyone-"
James gasped.
"I pleaded with him, and he finally said he wouldn't tell anyone if I'd…if I'd do anything he said."
James stiffened.
"I-I was scared, James. I agreed because I couldn't let anything happen to Remus."
Eventually, James nodded. His eyes were dark, furious.
"That son of a-"
"Look James," Said Lily. "It's over now. He's told me he won't say anything…h-he feels terrible about hurting me."

"Did he force you into anything?" James said, his eyes wide. "Did he?"
Lily shook her head. "He, he kissed me…but nothing more, I promise."
James sighed, looking relieved.
"You did all of that, just for Remus? You were abused, sent to the hospital wing for a friend?" He smiled slightly.
Lily shrugged, feeling self-conscious. "Of course, I couldn't let that happen."
James brought his hands up to cradle her face.
"You're incredible, Lily."
She shook her head slightly. "Not really, I-"
Before she could finish, James leaned down at kissed her gently, carefully.
He pulled back.
"Thank you," He whispered. "For saving him."
Lily smiled and kissed him this time, placing her hands on his waist as James pulled her in tighter.

They hadn't even noticed that the door to the marauders dormitory had been open a crack, a frail boy peering out as he held in the cough he was aching to let out.
And they didn't notice the door closing softly either.