Hey guys! Sorry for the delay on this…like I said, classes are ending and it's finals time, so things have been pretty crazed. Next week will be similarly busy, but I may have a little more time to write since I'll be done with editing and no longer living in the studio…so hopefully, I can get it up sooner than before (with the right motivation…shameless appeal for reviews haha). You guys are awesome as always, and thanks for being so patient. Hope you enjoy this one…song is Life Without You by Stanfour, very fitting.

Chapter Eleven

Didn't want to say goodbye
Didn't want to see you cry
And look what I've done

Didn't want to make a mess
Broke your heart and I confess:
I'm the guilty one!

Oh this is life without you
I'm learning how to miss you
I guess I need to know, how it feels like
This is life without you
I don't know who to turn to
And everything I know, to say this goodbye
so goodbye
This is life without you
This is life without you

"Sweetie, what are you doing?"

Brennan had been inside Booth's apartment building for twenty minutes when Angela, having circled the lot long enough to realize that Booth's car wasn't there, worriedly went in to find her.

She walked down the hallway to find Brennan leaning against Booth's apartment door, a crumpled piece of paper in her hand.

Angela touched the top of Brennan's had gently. "Booth isn't here?"

Brennan looked up at her best friend, and Angela's heart caught at the raw pain in Brennan's eyes. "He's gone."

Exhaling slowly, Angela braced her hand against the wall and, with difficulty, sat down beside Brennan. "What do you mean, he's gone? Bren, where did he…" Her voice trailed off slowly as Brennan soundlessly passed her Booth's note.

"Oh…" Angela scanned the note twice cutting her gaze at Brennan in concern. For a long moment, Angela couldn't think of what to say, and she squeezed Brennan's shoulder gently. Finally, she tried hesitantly, "Maybe this is okay, Bren. Maybe…maybe it's what he needs."

Brennan was already shaking her head, and she protested in a thick voice, "He didn't say where he was going, Angela. He didn't…" Her voice hitched, and Brennan looked away. "He didn't even say if he's coming back."

"Of course he'll be back," Angela murmured automatically. "Parker's here, his job's here…you're here." When Brennan said nothing, Angela reread the note, then said carefully, "It sounds like he's just taking some time to get himself together. It could be good."

It was obvious from the dull, detached look in Brennan's eyes that she wasn't taking in a word Angela was saying. So Angela wordlessly curled her fingers around Brennan's and sat silently beside her best friend for the next few minutes.

Until Brennan's voice quietly, slowly broke through the quiet. "I have to find him."

~(B*B)~

"Bones! Bones…"

Booth's eyes snapped open to meet relative darkness. He stilled his thrashing legs, tangled in the sheets. He was soaked in sweat.

It was that nightmare again, the one where he ran through the studio basement, calling her name until his throat was raw, but never hearing her answer.

Booth flung the sheets away, swallowing hard. He was shaky and disoriented, particularly in the unfamiliarity of Jared's guest room.

He'd gotten to his brothers at only seven thirty, and had barely exchanged greetings before Padme had correctly observed that he looked like he hadn't slept in days and shown him to the guest room.

Booth rolled over, trying to even out his harsh, shallow breathing.

It was useless, as it always was. That nightmare brought him right back to that moment, calling for Bones even as he got increasingly terrified that he was too late, that he'd lost her.

So after a moment, Booth stood and headed out of the room, unable to shake the need for his usual post-nightmare routine.

He'd been rummaging around Jared's kitchen for several minutes when he heard a voice behind him. "Hey."

Booth turned just as light flooded the kitchen; his brother was standing in the doorway, blinking sleepily. "Everything okay?"

"Sorry I woke you," Booth replied gruffly.

"You looking for something?" Jared asked, arching a brow.

Booth clenched his fists at his side, grimacing as he admitted, "I need a drink. A beer, just…something."

Jared chuckled softly. "Can't help you there, bro." He grabbed his wallet on the kitchen counter and, after a moment, flipped a chip in Booth's direction. "Over two years sober. No alcohol in this house."

Turning the small chip over in his hand, Booth nodded. "Right." He'd known that; in fact, it was part of the reason why he'd decided on his brother's place.

Jared had an uncharacteristically scrutinizing look on his face as he studied his brother. He walked to the fridge and grabbed two water bottles, wordlessly passing one to Booth and jerking his head toward the table "You wanna sit, Seeley?"

Booth accepted the water bottle but didn't open it. "It's okay, Jared. You can go back to bed."

But Jared was already sitting down. "I'm cool, never needed much sleep."

"Right." Booth's fingers nervously picked at the label on the water bottle.

The mental spiral was happening again, and here in his brother's house, he had no way to numb it.

Bones in the basement….her statement in the file…Hannah in Brennan's lab coat….Greg Thomas' hands all over Bones…his last words to her, the I don't need you….leaving her in the hospital…his friends in the diner, without him….Rebecca sending Parker out of his apartment…breaking down in front of Bones…her waiting for him tonight, for a call that wouldn't come, yet another disappointment from him…

A frustrated, strangled sound rose from Booth's throat. He could feel Jared's eyes on him. "Seeley. What's going on?" After a moment of silence, Jared prodded knowingly, "You just taking the breakup hard?"

Booth's head snapped up, his gaze blazing as it landed on Jared. "It's not about Hannah!" he snapped with more force than necessary, causing Jared's eyebrows to shoot up.

"Okay, okay. Point taken." He paused, then added, "So it's Tempe?"

Booth blinked at him, surprised. "Wh…why do you say that?"

"Am I wrong?"

Staring down at the bottle in his hand, Booth hesitated before answering.

His phone conversation with Jared had been brief. Booth had replied to his brother's innocuous 'How are you'? with the blunt answer 'I just got out of the hospital because I drank myself unconscious. Any chance you're up for a house guest?'

Now, the curiosity in Jared's expression was palpable. So, sighing, Booth finally walked over to the table and joined his brother.

Then, in an unprecedented moment, he began to confide in his younger brother.

Booth told him everything; might as well, considering it was all circling in his head, and he no longer had any way to stop it.

Jared listened silently, his reactions limited to facial expressions as Booth went through everything.

When he finished, Jared nodded thoughtfully for a long moment, then spoke for the first time in nearly half an hour. "Can I ask something, Seel?"

His voice hoarse, Booth replied warily, "Sure."

"Why'd you come here?"

Booth almost smiled. It was a fair question. All his life he was the one bailing Jared out, letting his brother make permanent claim to the role as the screw up. Booth confiding in him for once…it wasn't normal.

Booth took his time considering the question. There were a lot of reasons…Jared's former alcoholism and current sobriety, for one thing. The distance, for another…it was out of DC but less than half an hour away, in case Parker needed him.

What Booth said, though, in a low voice, was, "I figured…you might be the one person who wouldn't think less of me." Booth paused, his eyes darkening. "It's not that I don't deserve it, but…"

"…but who am I to judge, right?" Jared finished with a wry smile.

"I don't mean-"

"Nah, I get it." Jared met his eyes. "And you're right. I don't think less of you."

A small smile curved Booth's lips. "Thanks."

Jared pushed back his chair and stood. "You're welcome. And you know you can stay as long as you need. But…" He clapped a hand on his older brother's shoulder. "You should call her."

Booth didn't pretend to misunderstand. "I can't."

"She's going to be worried about you. I know, I know , you left her your sad little…fake rock note. But you need to call, and tell her your really okay." He paused, then added, "And that you're coming back."

Nodding wordlessly, Booth didn't bother to tell his brother he wasn't sure yet if that was true.

~(B*B)~

Brennan was waiting outside Hacker's office for twenty minutes before he got the Hoover the next day.

"Temperance!" Surprise was threaded to his smile, but he beamed at her. "Surprised to see you here…how are you feeling?"

"Fine," she said dismissively . "I'm here about Booth, actually…"

Motioning her to follow him into his office, Hacker nodded knowingly, "Right. Can't say I was too surprised when he called yesterday. He's been a bit off ever since that Greg Thomas case." He gave her an apologetic smile. "You know that, of course. We'll miss him, of course, but-"

"Miss him?" Brennan repeated , her stomach clenching. She'd been terrified of coming here and finding out that Booth had quit, or transferred, or anything permanent. "He's…how many vacation days did he take?"

Hacker frowned. "He asked for a leave of absence, actually. An indefinite one." Brennan looked away, tightening her jaw as she forced her expression to remain impassive. "You didn't know?"

"I just wasn't certain how specific he was," Brennan forced out finally. "Did he…mention where he was going?"

"No, he didn't say." Hacker's brow was furrowed, concern starting to settle on his face. "Listen, Temperance…"

"Thank you," Brennan said hurriedly. Before he could stop her, she turned and hurried out of the office.

Angela was asleep in the car outside the building, jolting awake only when Brennan slammed the passenger side door behind her.

Straightening, Angela glanced blearily at Brennan, waiting for an update. Finally, Angela prompted, "So?"

"Leave of absence," Brennan said flatly. "Indefinite."

Angela winced, but after a moment, she forced a smile. "See, he's coming back."

"Right," Brennan said dully.

Deciding it was best not to push it right now, Angela cranked the car and wordlessly drove toward the lab.

~(B*B)~

Booth was sitting at the table, listening to Padme and Jared tell him about the house renovation they did last summer, when his cell phone rang.

He picked it up from the table and looked down at the screen, then clicked the ignore button and silenced the ringing.

Jared stopped talking immediately, giving his brother a look.

"Not yet," Booth murmured, shoving a piece of bacon into his mouth and avoiding his brother's gaze.

After a moment, though, his phone rang again. His chest constricting, Booth turned his cell phone off and shoved it into his pocket.

Silence hung for a moment; Padme glanced at Jared uncertainly, and after a moment of hesitation, Jared started, "Seeley-"

Booth stood abruptly. "Thanks for breakfast, Padme, it was great…but, uh, I think I'm gonna…take a walk."

Not giving them a chance to protest, Booth walked out the door.

Walking down the unfamiliar street, Booth clutched his head, screwing his eyes shut, suddenly dizzy.

When he got back, Jared and Padme would be gone to work. But here was the flaw in Booth's plan to get away…at least in DC, he'd had work as a distraction. Granted, it wasn't particularly effective, as working without Bones was a glaringly obvious reminder of why he wasn't.

Still, there was paperwork, and interrogations….other things to think about.

Here, all he had was time.

And Booth really wanted a drink.

~(B*B)~

"You really don't know where he is?"

Cam sighed, and repeated yet again, "I promise you, I didn't even know Booth was gone until Dr. Hodgins told me this morning."

Brennan turned away, frustrated. Walking away from all of them, Brennan left one of her crutches behind so she could pull out her cell phone.

Again, it went straight to voicemail, and this time, Brennan left one., her voice quiet so the others couldn't hear.

"Booth, it's me…Bones. Just …Please call me when you can. Please."

When Brennan hung up and turned to face the platform, she saw the others looking at her pityingly. "What?" she snapped, not expecting an answer, and not waiting around for one she hobbled toward her office.

~(B*B)~

For the first week and half he was at his brother's, Jared mostly left Booth alone. It was clear Booth was still wrecked about what happened. Sometimes he wanted to talk, and Jared would listen, but mostly Booth was surly and withdrawn, battling his demons on his own as always.

Always a light sleeper, Jared heard Seeley most nights, in the room beside the master bedroom, screaming in nightmares until he woke u and started wandering the house, like some visiting ghost.

For awhile, Jared said nothing about his brothers nightmares, or his midnight excursions; not until Jared had heard the car pull away from the house two nights in a row did he do something about it.

He was sitting at the kitchen table in the dark when his brother appeared, pulling on a jacket over clothes he'd clearly just thrown on. "You going somewhere?" Jared asked innocently.

Booth spun, his eyes wide, looking for all the world like a teenager caught breaking curfew. "Sorry I woke you," he mumbled.

"Nothing new," Jared said casually. He paused, then stated slyly, "You found the bar, huh?"

The guilt that flickered across Booth's face told Jared he was right. Awkward silence stretched between them for a moment, and then Jared ventured, "Listen, man, there's a meeting nearby I used to go to, Friday nights at this church…I can take you if you wan-"

"No!" Booth nearly yelled back. Instantly defensive, he retorted firmly. "I'm not an alcoholic, Jared. I'm not like…"

"What?" Jared shot back, raising his eyebrows. "Not like me?"

"Not like Dad," Booth corrected forcefully. "I'm not."

"Never said you were. You haven't hurt anyone."

Exhaling slowly, Booth ran a shaking hand over his face. "Except…" He paused, throat constricting. "Except I have."

For a moment Jared was uncomprehending, but then he rolled his eyes. "It's not the same-"

"I put her in the hospital, Jared," Booth gritted out. "He nearly…" He swallowed. "That bastard shot her, and he nearly raped her. All because I yelled at her, said I didn't need her. Well, that and because for five months I'd given her every reason to think I would have left her for dead!"

He was shouting by the end of this explanation, and Jared merely stared at him, his expression maddeningly calm.

After a long silence, pierced only by Booth's harsh, ragged breathing, Jared asked simply, "What would you have done?" When Booth didn't immediately answer, Jared added, "You loved Hannah. Or at least, you said you did. So what would you have done?"

"I don't know," Booth muttered, staring at the floor, his standard answer.

"Yeah, you do."

The pause lasted forever, but finally Booth breathed out, "I couldn't have handled it. Losing her, I couldn't have…I can't live without her." Jared tilted his head at him, waiting for more. So finally, Booth admitted. "Bones. It's always been Bones, I…I need her."

"Yeah I know," Jared said, half smiling at him. "So why are you here?"

In the long, heavy silence that followed, Jared stood up and easily pulled Booth's keys from his hand. "Go to bed, Seeley."

~(B*B)~

"What are you doing?"

Brennan glanced over her shoulder to see Angela standing in the doorway, frowning at her.

Immediately, Brennan turned back around and carried on with what she was doing: piling her things into her suitcase.

"I'm packing."

"You don't have to go right away."

Brennan closed her eyes briefly. "You heard the doctor, Ange. I'm cleared to drive, and the crutches are gone." She nodded at the cane lying unused on her bed. "There's no reason I can't go back to my own apartment."

Angela sighed, raking her hands through her hair. "Bren, I don't think you should go. I…I'm worried about you."

Her hands stilled, hovering over the suitcase. Without turning to face her friend, Brennan stated flatly, "The doctor said-"

"I'm not talking about your leg, Bren," Angela retorted heatedly. "Booth being gone…I know you're upset, and you're becoming a little obsessed-"

"It's been over a week, Angela." Brennan interrupted, finally whirling to face her. "He won't answer my calls, no one at work seems to know where he is…and now that I can drive myself around, I can be much more effective in searching for him…"

"See, that's what worries me. All this stuff about searching for Booth…he isn't missing, Bren. He left."

Instantly, hot tears welled in Brennan's eyes and she quickly turned around again, frustrated. Since Booth had left, she'd found herself constantly on the verge of tears, and it was a weakness she hated.

Angela's chest constricted instantly, and she placed a hand on Brennan's back. "Sweetie, I didn't mean it like that….I just meant, he's alright. You don't have to be scared for him, Bren. Booth's smart, and I think he just needed to get away for awhile…to work through everything that's happened."

Brennan closed her eyes tightly, fingers curling tightly around the shirt in her hands.

After a moment, Angela added gently, "Stay for a little while longer. Jack and I have both loved having you, and I think it'll be good for you."

Swallowing, Brennan shook her head and replied as evenly as she could, "Ange, your due date is in a few weeks. You don't need me here causing you stress."

"I'll be less stressed if you're here, Bren, where I can keep an eye on you."

"You don't have to do that," Brennan replied, zipping her bag and finally turning around to give Angela a small, forced smile. "But I really appreciate you letting me stay." To Angela's surprised, Brennan hugged her quickly, then asked, "Can you give me a ride?"

"No, I can't, actually." Angela said stubbornly.

Pulling back, Brennan shrugged and lifted her bags. "Fine, I'll call a cab."

She was halfway down the hall before Angela called after her. "Wait…" The artist sighed, shaking her head. "Let me get my keys."

~(B*B)~

The morning after Jared caught him attempting to leave the house, Booth came downstairs to find his younger brother waiting for him.

"Why aren't you at work?" Booth asked, instantly suspicious.

"Going in late today," Jared answered, then grinned. "I figure you've had enough time to sit on your ass doing nothing. Got a little project for you."

"Wasn't aware I was at camp," Booth replied dryly, but he followed his brother outside anyway.

They walked through the yard and into what looked like an unattached garage, far off the yard. Booth entered and instantly his mouth dropped. "Is that-"

"1967 GT500 Mustang. Yeah." Jared smiled. "I thought I might need a little project during unemployment, you know, but I got about halfway through restoring the thing before I found a job."

They grinned at each other; Pops had gotten them in restoring vintage cars pretty young, though it had been years since Booth had indulged in the hobby.

"You saying you don't want to do this yourself?"

"I'm saying I don't have time. The job's pretty demanding, plus I'm a married man. Actually…" Jared smiled. "We're thinking about starting trying soon. You know…for a kid."

"Wow…" Booth's grin flickered momentarily, but he forced it back as he slapped his brother's hand. "Big step."

"Who'd have thought, right?" Jared said good naturedly, inadvertently naming Booth's exact thoughts.

It was something that had continually struck him over the course of the past week and a half. Jared and Padme had such an easy, comfortable relationship. His brother was suddenly every inch the devoted husband, and as happy as Booth was for him, he was equally jealous.

He'd never thought Jared would beat him to that role.

"Anyway…" Jared waved a hand vaguely at the car. "Thought maybe it would keep you busy. Keep your mind off things."

Booth was nodding slowly, walking around the car and studying it carefully. He had to admit, Jared's idea was a good one; there was a spark of excitement in Booth's chest that felt absolutely foreign.

"Thanks, Jared."

~(B*B)~

She was only a few feet from her car when a hand landed on her shoulder. Tensing instantly, she jerked away and spun, clenching one fist in front of her in an instinctual, though mostly useless, fighting stance.

Brennan blinked at her confusedly. "Sorry?"

Hannah deflated, flushing slightly. "No, I'm sorry. Just, you know…" She laughed a little. "Last time someone grabbed my arm out here the other one was coming at me with chloroform."

"Right," Brennan said awkwardly.

After a pause, Hannah smiled at her. "Anyway. How are you?"

"Fine," Brennan relied automatically. "I was just wondering if you'd heard from Booth."

At the mention of his name, Hannah sighed. "I guess you know I moved out?"

"Yeah, but I mean…since then. In the last two weeks or so?"

Her eyebrows drawing together, Hannah shook her head. "No. I haven't talked to him since I left. Why, did he…say something to you?"

"He took a leave of absence from work," Brennan informed her bluntly. "To go out of town."

Surprisingly, Hannah didn't seem shocked. "Yeah, well, that's probably good. Maybe it'll stop him from living at a bar."

Hannah started around her car, preparing to leave, but Brennan felt a sudden surge of anger, and she heard herself saying, "So you knew he was drinking?"

Laughing humorlessly, she reminded Brennan, "I was living with him, Temperance."

"So you just left him on his own? The minute things got difficult with him, you decided you couldn't handle it, just because he was drinking? Even though you knew there might be a problem, you didn't try to help him? Instead, you just gave up on him, didn't even tell anyone else?"

For a moment, Hannah looked startled at the venom in the other woman's tone; Brennan had never spoken to her like that before. Then, eyes narrowing, Hannah said, "He was going over to Hodgins' place every night, trying to see you. It wasn't as though he was cut off from the world."

Brennan's throat narrowed, her own guilt at the way they'd all cut Booth out returning rapidly.

Her tone softening as she took in the distressed expression on Brennan's face, Hannah told her quietly, "And I didn't leave Seeley because of the drinking."

Not meeting Hannah's eyes, Brennan murmured, "Then why?"

"Because he was obviously in love with you."

Brennan lifted her head, eyes hardening. "You're wrong…"

"I don't think I am. He was miserable, Temperance. He'd been miserable since the moment I got back to the lab without you…and that didn't change. He was screaming your name in nightmares, coming home in the middle of the night drunk. I didn't make him happy. And I just knew."

"Knew what?"

"That he needed you."

Eyes stinging again, Brennan looked away, shaking her head hard. "No, Booth…Booth doesn't need me. He said so himself."

This was news to Hannah, but she only shrugged. "He says stupid things sometimes. All men do. But he couldn't hide it. " She forced a smile. "You were wrong down there, Temperance. I asked him once who he would have chosen, and he wouldn't say." She opened her car door and added just before ducking into it, "Seems if I was the answer to that question, he wouldn't mind telling me. Don't you think?"

~(B*B)~

For the next week or so, Booth dedicated his energies to the car. In spite of his insistences that he had no time, Jared joined him a few evenings, the two of them settling into an easy rhythm in the work.

Booth was starting to feel calmer, more controlled. He still woke to nightmares every night, but instead of getting up and heading to a bar, he lay in the dark, forcing away thoughts of Bones with thoughts of Jared, his two year sobriety chip and his offer of an AA meeting, or the memories of his father and everything Booth didn't want to be.

One morning, when he'd been there just under three weeks, Booth was downstairs before Jared and Padme had left for work, showered and fully dressed.

"You're up early," Jared noted, then swept his gaze over the suit Booth was wearing. "Hope you aren't planning on working in the garage like that."

"Nah, I'm heading over to Quantico, see an old buddy of mine who transferred there a few years back. He's gonna show me around the place, and then grab some lunch."

"Cool deal," Jared replied. "It's only about a ten minute drive for you."

"Yeah, I looked it up last night."

Jared grabbed his keys and headed for the door. "Have fun with that, Seel." He grinned. "Call me if you get lost."

~(B*B)~

"So what brings you this way, Seel?" Alex Winters asked as the waitress set plates in front of them. "You got a case nearby?"

"Nah, just visiting my brother for a few days," Booth said, a half truth. "I had a few vacation days, and he and his wife moved nearby last summer. Hadn't seen the place yet."

"Good deal."

They were eating lunch at a small place that reminded Booth eerily of the Royal diner, so much so that a strange pang of homesickness hit him when he first walked in.

"Heard you were back with the army for awhile."

Booth nodded, "Did a seven month stint in Afghanistan. Training, mostly."

"You like that?"

Booth raised a brow. "Afghanistan?"

Alex shook his head. "The training."

"Oh…" Booth paused, considering it. "Yeah, I did, actually."

"Not surprised, former sergeant and all." Alex smiled. "You'd do well at Quantico."

Laughing a little, Booth asked, "What do you mean?"

"Training agents. I thought I'd miss the cases, but I love this stuff. You probably would, too."

"No way, I…I think I'm just more of a field guy."

"That's what I thought," Alex countered, giving him a look. "You can't tell me you don't get sick of it. That feeling of powerlessness. Knowing that even if you solve every homicide you're given, it doesn't change the fact that they keep happening? Knowing you'll never get justice for everyone?"

Booth thought of Greg Thomas, that hatred in his face when he'd looked at Booth. He thought of that man killing himself. He thought of everything he'd done to Bones, all for revenge on Booth just for doing his job.

He thought of Bones' statement, the way she nearly died just for being his partner.

"Yeah. I guess I do get tired of it."

~(B*B)~

Brennan had been staring at the file in front of her for several minutes without taking in a word.

Work days had become increasingly tedious lately. With her due date so close, Angela was home on her actual maternity leave, which meant that Hodgins was popping in and out whenever they didn't have a pressing case.

Between their absence and Booth's, it was starting to feel like an even lonelier version of the months leading up to her kidnapping.

Except now, it was much worse. Because instead of merely feeling hurt and unwanted by Booth, Brennan was constantly worried about him. It was the not knowing that scared her: not knowing where he was, how he was doing or, most importantly, when he was coming back.

She hadn't stopped calling, or emailing, or visiting the Hoover to see if Booth had checked in with anyone. So far, it had all been useless.

"Bones!"

For a second, hearing the nickname, Brennan's heart stopped, even though the voice was much too high to belong to her partner.

Brennan looked up to find Parker standing in her doorway, beaming. "Parker. Hi."

He skidded further into the room, coming to lean on her desk. "I haven't seen you in a really long time, Bones."

"I know," she replied, ignoring the dull pang in her chest as she realized that it had, in fact, been months. "It's good to see you….who brought you here?"

"Science club started up again," The boy told her casually, picking up one of the artifacts on her desk and studying it. "And we got out early. Dad said if that ever happened I should come wait for Mom with you, even if he isn't here."

"That was smart of him," Brennan answered, smiling at him.

"Yeah. And it's cool cause I haven't seen you." He grinned. "I wanna come back to the pool again!"

"You're welcome anytime."

"Cool. Last time was so fun, with the diving contest."

"Which you cheated in," Brennan teased him.

Parker laughed. "Nuh-uh, Bones, we never said no backwards dives." His eyes lit up suddenly. "Maybe when my dad gets back we can come over and swim?"

Something flared in Brennan's chest. She'd never called Rebecca, because of Booth's comment about his ex cutting him off from Parker…yet Parker clearly knew Booth was out of town. "That sounds like fun…." She paused, choosing words carefully. "Do you know when he'll be back?"

Shrugging, Parker told her, "Mom said he doesn't know. She said he and Uncle Jared haven't seen each other in awhile and they're probably having fun."

Brennan closed her eyes briefly, feeling lightheaded and dizzy with relief.

Jared's.

She should have thought of that.

Brennan fumbled for her phone, and her finger was poised to call him when she froze, deciding that if Booth was so determined to avoid her, he would have warned Jared not to tell her where he lived.

Ten minutes later, after Rebecca had collected Parker (and look at Brennan with a sympathetic expression that suggested she knew more about Booth's absence than Brennan had assumed), Brennan had done some quick internet searching and had an address in her hand.

She was supposed to have dinner with her father that night (thanks to Max's spontaneous invitation that Brennan suspected had something to do with Angela), but after that, she could leave.

She'd finally found Booth.

~(B*B)~

It was nearly ten o clock that night when Jared, fresh from a shower, wandered into the living room to find his wife sitting on the couch, watching television . "You seen Seeley?"

Padme glanced out the window. "I think he's still in the garage."

"Weird…" Jared frowned. Booth had gotten back only a few hours ago, and hadn't done much talking before changing clothes and heading out to the garage.

Pulling on a jacket, Jared headed outside toward his brother.

Jared walked into the building and didn't immediately see Seeley. After a moment though, he caught of glimpse of his legs, sticking out from under the car. "Hey."

There was a pause in the light clanging of tools, and then Booth replied, "Hey."

"You're getting kind of addicted to this, huh? Can't even go a day without it…" When Booth didn't reply, Jared tried, "How's your Quantico friend?"

"He was good." Booth answered, his voice echoing from under the car. "It was good to see him."

"How come you were back so late?" Jared asked. "I thought you were just doing the lunch thing."

There was another pause. "Uh, I actually ended up sitting in on a training session at the shooting range…and then I met his boss, and he, uh, took me to dinner."

"The boss?"

"Yeah. I mean, Alex came, too." Slowly, Booth rolled out from the car and stood up. "He offered me a job."

"A job?" Jared repeated incredulously. "You said no, right?"

"Why?" Booth attempted a smile. "You don't want me any closer than I already am?"

Jared didn't smile. "What about Parker?"

"Half an hour away, I can see him as much as I have been. I don't mind driving to pick him up every other weekend. That's nothing."

Still, Jared's expression was stony. "Since when do you want to train agents?"

"God, I don't know…maybe since being an agent nearly got my partner killed. Because of me, and because of my job."

"That's not you, Seeley," Jared insisted quietly.

"So what? I'm not me anymore, Jared. I…I don't even recognize myself lately. I think I need a change. I need to start over."

"What about Tempe?"

Booth sighed. "She's actually a big part of it. This way…she can be okay. All I do is hurt her."

"Yeah no kidding," Jared shot back, and suddenly his voice wasn't quiet anymore.

Booth's eyes flashed. "What's that mean?"

"That's really fucking hypocritical of you, Seeley. All you've done since you got here is whined about how you left her behind for five months. Now you want to make that permanent?" Jared made a scoffing sound. "Maybe she was right. You don't care about her."

In an instant Booth had a fist clenched around his brothers jacket, a fist raised, but Jared wrenched away. "Nice temper, Seeley. Maybe you are like dad after all."

"Take that back," Booth spat through clenched teeth, advancing on his brother again.

Jared ignored him. "I have no problem with you staying here. I think it was probably a good move. But the fact that you can't even bother to call her…"

"You don't know what you're fucking talking about. And stop acting like you care so much about Bones."

"I do, actually." Jared met his eyes, challengingly. "You don't have a monopoly on screwing up and making mistakes, Seeley. You know that. That used to be my whole life, and the fact that it's not anymore is mainly thanks to two women. One of them's my wife now, and the other one's your partner."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"When you were kidnapped…I had about five seconds between finding out it happened and her demanding I break the law. I told her it was illegal, told her I couldn't do it. I was a selfish asshole, Seeley, and I'm not proud of that.

"But she laid into me. Called me out on being a coward, told me I didn't deserve you. Made it completely obvious how selfish I was." He smiled humorlessly. "First decent thing I'd done in years and it got me fired. But my brother lived, and getting fired was the only reason I met Padme. And Temperance, she was the one who made that happen. She wasn't giving up on you, no matter what, and she reminded me that you'd never turned your back on me." He shook his head. "So why are you turning your back on her?"

"She's better off," Booth answered, his voice low. "You don't get it."

"I think you're the one who doesn't get it."

Angry, frustrated, Booth turned and stalked out of the barn. So much for the idea that his brother wouldn't think less of him.

He was almost back to the house when he stopped dead in his tracks. Someone was walking up to the front door, and though his first instinct was to run, his legs were paralyzed beneath him.

Slowly, she turned to stare at him, relief breaking across her features as their eyes locked.

"Bones?"

So that's all for that one. Again, thanks for sticking with me and keep reading. Please let me know what you thought of everything, I love hearing from you guys. Hope to post soon…enjoy Thursday's episode….seriously, how amazing was the promo? My angst loving self is thrilled beyond belief, even as my heart prepares to be thoroughly crushed by Brennan/Emily.