Welcome back everyone. Caution: Minor spoiler for the episode "Sorcerer in Love." You can pretty much call Niall our "emotional punching bag." Enjoy and review.

How Embarrassing… Not Really

Niall had fainted on camera. Everyone watching had seen him faint. When he had come to, he really had come close to actually getting over his problem speaking to people or in this case just speaking when people were present. He had attempted to say "OW" once he felt the pain in his head but upon seeing both Heidi and Ken, and indeed many people outside of the room looking in on them, Niall just ended up sitting there with his mouth hanging open.

Since he had fainted on camera, it would have been embarrassing but it wasn't. Considering Ken had been going on about always wanting to see someone have their arm ripped off by a chimpanzee and then have the chimp beat them to death with said arm… It was one of the few logical reactions.

As Heidi helped Niall up, Ken had taken a seat in Heidi's chair. One could only imagine what he had in mind.

"Hello, this is Ken Finlayson speaking. You probably remember me hijacking this show when the Death Raptor was in town. Do not be alarmed! The Death Raptor is not back from the dead, its just killer chimps on the loose. I am looking for a volunteer to sacrifice to the chimps. I'd love to see some get beaten to death with their own arm or ever having their face torn off! So please, call me at 905-509-1992. The first volunteer will get a funeral to make the leaders of entire nations jealous!" Well, needless to say, Ken had just become disturbing. It was at that point that Ken turned his head to look at Niall. "Niall, thank you for volunteering!"

"What the juice, Ken? You just choose the person who has trouble speaking to people?"

"Of course, Heidi! Who better than the person who can't speak because that way he can't protest, can't stand up for himself, he can't do anything!"

Heidi was not impressed. Rather like a kitten that didn't like being outside, being outside while being licked by a dachshund. "You are evil!"

"It's a Monday isn't it?"

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Nobody likes Mondays! If people have an excuse to be bored, tired or dragging their feet on a Monday then I have an excuse to be evil on a Monday." That was some logic Ken had.

Naturally, while Heidi and Ken were… having an interesting conversation, Niall left the room. He had to get the juice out!

Niall wasn't three feet out the door when Heidi's phone started ringing. She answered it. "Niall, it's for you!" Niall stopped his tracks and turned to look at Heidi. Why would someone be calling him through Heidi's cell number? "I'll put it on speaker!" She did just that and out came a rather Jewish mother-like voice.

It was Niall's mother. The weird thing was that Mrs. Warburton wasn't Jewish, she was Spanish. Bizarrely enough, Mrs. Finlayson had something similar going on but her voice was far more masculine and was known to drive people mad, like what a bearing rein does to a horse!

"Niall! We are so happy you volunteered to be sacrificed to the killer chimps! Please know that your father and I won't be attending your funeral because we like your brother more than we like you!" Niall had always suspected his parents liked his older brother Robert more than him but hearing like that really, really hurt! "Also we will forget about you when you're gone because we like your brother more than we do you! That's why you're second born!" Niall was really tempted to smash Heidi's phone with something. He didn't give in to it but still he wanted to.

Heidi wasn't impressed. Ken had parent issues too since his parents were rarely home, always out on an archaeological dig but he had always had his brother Pierre who was now attending university in Outer Mongolia meaning Ken was alone at home. Ken was also second born but he really didn't think anything about jumping into this literally one-sided conversation.

Niall then walked out. It was better that he made as much distance between himself and Ken as possible. Maybe he could get Theresa Fowler to be his bodyguard? She could always break Ken's skull with her batons!

He had never thought much about Theresa. He had always liked her as a friend but then again he always liked people who never made jokes about his problem. But then she had asked him to dance with her at the Dance Beneath the Stars. He ended up getting a crush on her but the only reason she had asked Niall to dance with her was because Theresa had previously Randy to dance with her but because Howard was standing next to Randy he had presumed Theresa was asking him to dance. The result was Randy and Howard arguing and Theresa walking away. Then she asked Niall if he wanted to dance, Niall nodded and they danced.

Randy had a crush on Theresa, Theresa had a crush on Randy and Niall had a crush on Theresa. Niall was just asking for heartbreak! Did Niall know Theresa had a crush on Randy? No and he didn't know Randy had a crush on Theresa.

What Mrs. Warburton had said to Niall, her own son, over the phone, had hurt but as always he kept it bottled up. If Niall was to find out but Randy and Theresa's mutual crush then maybe, just maybe, Niall would let it all out.

Or maybe it would finally cause him to speak? If what his mom had said didn't make him speak then what would?

Niall was a sad individual but there was a certain enjoyment in knowing Niall was sad.