It's easy if you try…or maybe not so easy?
"Hey bro. Sup?" Finn jerked at the sudden weight on his shoulder, turning to face the perpetrator.
"Oh. Hey Puck." He mumbled, shaking his head a little. This whole thinking too much thing was really taking up his attention...he really needed to stop that.
"What's up?" Puck asked again as he leaned on his locker, this time with a confused and mildly concerned look on his face. "You're all spaced out again dude."
"Sorry." Finn apologised, turning to face him. "Just been thinking about stuff."
"What stuff?" Puck pushed, tilting his head slightly.
"Nothing major…just Rachel and shit." Finn lied, at this moment wishing the truce and sort-of friendship he had gained with Puck had never eventuated.
"Yeah right man." Puck said with a frown. "I'm not stupid you know. You got that look on your face."
"What look?" Finn sighed, already over dealing with his former-best-friend acting like everything was normal between them.
"You know." Puck replied, pausing as he realised Finn really didn't know what he meant. "Like when Quinn was carrying my Puckling. That worried about shit look."
Finn stared at the tanned teenager for a moment before shaking his head. "Right. Whatever man." He began to walk off, hoping that Puck would leave it there.
"Seriously dude. What's up?" Puck must have been feeling really guilty about the whole Quinn thing…that was usually the only reason he would make such an effort with Finn nowadays.
"It's nothing. I've got to go to class Puck. Later dude."
Puck watched as he walked away, shaking his head to himself. "Whatever…" he sighed, and walked away.
….X…
Kurt found himself waiting all day for the final bell to ring. After his encounter with Karofsky, he was having even more trouble then usual pretending things were normal. "Get a grip, Kurt." He muttered to himself, shaking his head. He ignored Mercedes' concerned stare from the seat beside him, and silently rejoiced as the bell signalling the end of Spanish, and thankfully the end of the school day, rang.
"Hey Kurt, we still hanging at mine this afternoon?" Mercedes' grabbed his hand on his way out. Crap. Completely forgot about that.
"I'm sorry Mercedes, but I promised my father I would help him out at the garage today." Kurt gave his best apologetic look. "He's had a major influx of business lately." Though she looked a little suspicious, Mercedes just nodded and waved goodbye, heading to her own locker. While he felt bad for lying to his best friend, he couldn't exactly tell her the reason he couldn't hang out with her was because he ached so badly from his beating that he could hardly walk. No, definitely not an option.
"Hey Princess." Kurt sighed, jerked out of his thoughts by the undeniable eloquence of Noah Puckerman.
"Can I help you?" He said, admittedly, more then a little bitingly.
Puck, however, did not rise to the bait. "I dunno man. Have you noticed how weird Finn's been acting lately?"
"Not really." Kurt said, swinging his locker closed. To be honest, he wasn't even lying. He really hadn't noticed anything up with his almost-step-brother.
"Oh. Okay." To his credit, Puck did look legitimately concerned. No, Kurt thought. I didn't notice anything up with Finn, but there is definitely something up with you. Nodding by way of goodbye, Puck began to walk away, that half concerned half confused look still evident on his face.
Kurt went back to what he was doing, and soon forgot about the ex-bully's odd behaviour. You never really did know with Puck. Perhaps he was really concerned…but more likely, there were less genuine motives behind his concern. Maybe he was feeling guilty about Quinn again. Kurt really didn't know, and to be honest, he really didn't care.
….X…
A week later, and Finn was still no closer to clearing his head. He swore he was thinking more then he ever had before in the span of one month. Why? He had no clue. But the full-ness of his brain kinda sucked. Even Rachel had noticed his spacing out. And that was saying something.
"Finn! There you are!" Speak of the devil…
"Hey Rach." He greeted with a smile. "What's up?"
"What's up?" She shrieked, the intensity of her voice distracting him from the words for a second. "I was just subjected to the Spanish inquisition…" Oookay, and that's where she lost him. What the hell was a Spanish inquisition? He couldn't remember Mr. Schue mentioning that. Or anyone, really. Not even Kurt. He would have to ask Kurt later, he was sure to know what it meant, even if he didn't use the word. Kurt was just like that, he knew everything. Because he really was a cool guy if you got to know him.
"Finn!" Oh, woops, and there's that losing track of thoughts thing again.
"Sorry Rach, you lost me at the Spanish what's-it." Finn admitted, blushing a little.
Rachel rolled her eyes, grabbing his arm. "Puck just asked me a million questions about us. He thinks there is something wrong with our relationship! This is a disaster! I'm going to have to…"
Puck? Again? Finn sighed, his brain already automatically tuning out his girlfriend's screech that could sometimes be considered a voice. He liked her and all, but sometimes he agreed with Puck's assessment – she would be way hotter with duck tape over her mouth. What was Puck's deal? The dude didn't usually give a shit. No one did. But suddenly, it's all he was hearing about!
Finn walked away from his still rambling girlfriend, heading over to the locker where he knew his ex-best friend would be. Ignoring Rachel's protests, he approached Puck quickly.
"Dude. Is there a problem?" Finn asked, his eyes narrowing uncharacteristically.
"I dunno man, you tell me." Puck answered, closing his locker and turning to face Finn.
"Just stop it Puck." Finn muttered, shaking his head. "I don't know what's in it for you, but I'm fine, there is noting wrong, and questioning my girlfriend about it isn't going to get you answers." Finn paused for a moment, trying to calm himself down before things got out of control. "What's in it for you Puck? Why do you care?"
Puck stared intensely at him for a moment, looking a little confused. "Because I care about you Finn, you're my best friend."
Finn suddenly felt a foreign rush of rage take over his mind. "Shut the fuck up!" he yelled, slamming Puck into the locker. "Stop saying you care. If you cared you wouldn't have screwed my girlfriend and got her pregnant!"
"Calm down, Finn. I thought we were over that." Puck actually looked helpless – a quality that wasn't usually associated with the former bully.
"Don't tell me to fucking calm down!" Finn was lost in the rage, his fists buried in Puck's jacket as he pinned him up against the locker. Nothing made sense anymore, and he was sick of it. Sick of the fake concern and pretend friendships.
"Whoah, whoah what's going on here?" a voice interrupted, grabbing Finn's arm. "Finn, leave him alone. He's not even fighting back. What happened?" Mr. Schue.
"Why do you care?" Finn said hotly, refusing to meet his teacher's gaze.
"What?" Schue seemed a bit taken aback. "What's wrong with you Finn?"
"Nothing!" Finn growled. "There is nothing wrong with me. I'm sick of people asking me that."
"Okay." Schue held his hands out. Like what people did in movies when someone had a gun. "How about we go and talk for a bit?"
Finn shook his head. "I don't want to talk to you. There's nothing to talk about." Sweat was beginning to obstruct his vision a little, but he figured it probably added to the whole bad-ass ness he was probably looking like at the moment.
"Finn, you were holding Puck up against the locker for no reason. And, you're pretty worked up…" Schue was obviously trying to be…what's the word Kurt would use? Tactful, or restrained. One of those. As if he was afraid Finn would go off the rails at any moment.
"Finn, I'm going to have to ask you to come with me. Otherwise, it will be to Figgins." Schue caught his eye, pleading with him to listen. "Come on Finn, just come into the choir room for a bit."
Finn nodded finally, pulling his arm out of Schue's grasp. "Yeah. Yeah okay." Finn followed Schuester into the room, taking a seat as Schue motioned him to.
"What's up, Finn?" He asked, his eyes focused on Finn's face. Like nothing else mattered. Why would he look at Finn like that? Finn hated being confused. Other then arguing with Rachel, it was his least favourite thing. It felt like everyone knew something he didn't, and no one would let him in on the joke.
"Nothing." Finn said, staring at the floor.
"Please, Finn. Anyone can see there is something wrong with you. Even if Puck hadn't spoken to me earlier today-"
"He what?" Finn interrupted, a dark look in his eyes once more. "What is his deal?" Finn growled, standing up and beginning to pace. "I don't get it. What does he get out of this?"
Schue was looking confused again…well, at least Finn wasn't the only one. "get out of what, Finn?"
"This!" Finn sighed, waving his hands for emphasis. "Me being all stressed out like this."
"I think he was just concerned Finn…" Mr. Schue held a hand up as Finn began to interrupt. "These last few weeks you haven't been yourself."
"But he…with Quinn…how can he care about me?" Finn struggled with the idea, finally sitting down.
Schue sighed. "People make mistakes, Finn. Puck didn't mean to hurt you. He, well, he has been trying really hard to make things right between you."
Finn shook his head. "Well it's not going to work. I don't want or need his friendship. I'm fine on my own."
Schue shook his head. "That's your decision. I'm not telling you to forgive him, I'm just telling you to think about it. Puck is reaching out – I think you know as well as I do how hard that is for him. He is trying to make you realise he is sorry."
"I don't want to talk about this anymore." Finn said finally. "It's making me all angry again."
"Okay." Schue said with a sigh. "Well how about telling me what's got you acting strange lately?"
"I haven't been acting-"
"Okay, okay." Schue interrupted, seeing Finn's anger grow again. Schue really was good at knowing how people were feeling. Like with emotions and stuff. Finn was pretty sure there was a word for that. He would ask Kurt later. "Well how about just tell me anything that has been bothering you lately?"
"Why?" Finn asked plainly, confusion seeping into his mind.
"Sometimes talking about it can make things easier to understand. I want to help you sort things out Finn." Schue said, his hand patting the tall teenager's shoulder in comfort.
"I dunno." Finn shrugged. "It's noting really. Like I said."
"Okay. But there has to be something bothering you? Even if it's just a little thing?" Schue pushed.
"Well, yeah okay. A little. But it's not important or anything." Schue's stare made him continue. "I'm still mad at puck. He pisses me off acting like he cares after what he did." Finn shook his head. "I feel like he's fucking with me. Trying to confuse me or whatever." Finn paused, looking apologetically at his teacher. Schue, however, appeared to have decided to ignore his language for the time being.
"And Rachel." He continued after a moment, "She's kind of getting on my nerves." Schue nodded.
"Anything else?" he pressed quietly.
'Well...yeah there is one thing." Finn looked up at Schue. "I…I don't know if Kurt mentioned anything, but you know I had to move out of Kurt's place, yeah?" Schue nodded in affirmation. "Well, I was kinda mean to him. I said some stuff I didn't mean. I always do that." He sighed in frustration. "Nothing comes out the way I mean it. Like, ever. I think Kurt's cool. I don't mind him being gay or anything. And yeah, the whole crush thing weirded me out. But he's a cool guy, you know? I never meant to hurt him."
Schue nodded. "I think Kurt knows that." He said with a smile. "I don't think he took it as personally as you think."
"Really?" Finn met his gaze. "Cause he seemed kinda bummed about it. And I felt, well, I feel really bad. The whole thing is making me think too much. My head's all full. I can't keep track of things, it's like whenever I'm talking to someone something reminds me of that and I start feeling guilty and get distracted. I can't sleep properly anymore. I can't stop thinking and I'm so over it." Finn sighed.
"I know how you feel Finn. When something important is on your mind it can take up every thought and every moment of the day."
Finn nodded. "Yeah. That's what it feels like. How do I stop it?"
"You need to address the issue. If I've understood right, you feel guilty about saying those things to Kurt, and you have some unresolved issues with Puckerman. Is that right?" Finn nodded hesitantly. "Then talk to Kurt and talk to Puck. Say you're sorry for saying those things to him, and give Puck a chance to tell you how he feels. Try to stay calm and sleep on it before you act on anything Puck says."
Finn sighed, thinking for a while. Finally he raised his head, a small smile on his face. "How did you get so smart Mr. Schue?" He asked, shaking his head.
"It comes with age." Mr. Schue winked. "And from having experienced the same things myself."
Finn nodded. "Well thanks. Really, Mr. Schue. I think it helped."
"No problem." Schue flashed him one of his million dollar smiles. "I'd do it for any of you Glee kids, it's what I'm here for, right?"
Finn felt his heart fall a little at hi words. "Yeah. Bye Mr Schue." He muttered, leaving the room with thoughts swirling around his mind even worse then before. I'd do it for any of you Glee kids, it's what I'm here for, right? Finn sighed. He should have known it wasn't about him. Should have known Schue was just doing his job. Because really, when it came down to it, no one cared.
A/N: Heyy so sorry for those Kurt lovers out there, this was more of a Fin-y chapter. Kurt's more in the next one, promise! Also, credit must go where credit is due. I borrowed the term 'puckling' from 'How things work' by Crawler. An excellent fic, nice and angsty, I'd suggest you all read it if you enjoy slash of the Kurt/Puck variety. Also, thanks for the reviews and alerts I received :-) there is just nothing better to wake up to then some encouraging comments. –hint hint- hehe. Till next time dudes.