Author's Note: Special thanks to the reviewers of last chapter: 1xadzy3dgftw1xLSNx3dg1xMGG; hxchick; and Zolidify. Reviews genuinely make my day, so thanks for that. I can promise you that they will find Manuel. In fact, that scene is already written and both brynnifer and littlegreenbottle gave that one a thumbs up, so it's coming! I promise :)
Happy Thanksgiving! Originally this chapter was going to be a Christmas Party, but timing worked out so it was next...and who wouldn't change it to Thanksgiving?
Rossi opened the door warmly, ushering in his guests. "Happy Thanksgiving." He smiled at both of the women in front of him, "I'm so glad you could come today."
"Well JJ was having a good day yesterday." Emily smiled as she juggled several boxes in her hands, "And I convinced her that it wouldn't put her either of them in danger if W-I-L-L and," She paused, looking at the blonde intently for signs that she might have an episode, "you know who showed up." She cringed, gauging JJ's reaction. At first, the very idea that she would be in the same room as Will and Henry terrified the blonde to the core. But after weeks of having time to get used to the idea, JJ had told her yesterday that it would be okay for Henry and Will to come. While JJ still got nervous if Emily mentioned his name, it was at least an improvement.
Now Emily just hoped today went as smoothly as everyone had planned.
Because if there was anything that Emily had learned throughout this ordeal, it was that things tended not to go according to plan.
JJ followed Emily, biting her fingernail nervously and cradling her left arm as they stepped inside.
"Are you sure you're okay putting dinner together?" Dave asked Emily seriously. "I mean, you—" He gestured to JJ who was quickly scanning the room, "You already have a lot to deal with."
Emily waved her hand dismissively. "It's fine. I don't get to cook much anymore. You put the turkey in?"
Dave nodded, leading the women into the kitchen. "I put it in a couple of hours ago."
Emily sighed as she looked over the space in front of her, excited and a little wary of the task in front of her. While she loved cooking, she was also aware that JJ would feel more comfortable if she was able to see everything that went into the meal, though Emily had brought several of JJ's meal replacement shakes just in case.
JJ followed Emily into the kitchen promptly sitting down on a large stool while Emily began gathering ingredients.
Emily turned to her blonde companion, "JJ, you can either help me cook," She offered, mentally cataloguing the different areas that JJ could assist her without coming in contact with a knife or anything hot, "or you can sit here and draw. Which would you rather do?"
JJ bit her lip, but Emily smiled as she saw the cogs turning in the woman's mind as she tried to decide.
"Draw." JJ decided softly after a moment.
Emily smiled warmly as she pulled out a pad of paper, pencils, and JJ's worn eraser from her bag. She had to admit that she was relieved the younger woman hadn't offered to help, instead opting to work on the furious drawings that she usually ended up erasing completely, tearing up into small shreds, or finding some other way to destroy whatever images she had depicted.
Her therapist had said it might be some protective instinct or some sideways measure of exerting control.
Though each time Emily caught a glimpse of the fine masterpiece that JJ had created, she felt a pang of sorrow as the artistic representation was destroyed.
Because JJ was really talented—so much so, she wondered why the blonde hadn't long ago given up a career in government service to be able to pursue a career in art. Because JJ had a gift.
But according to her therapist, it was a good thing that JJ felt safe enough to destroy her own drawings.
JJ quickly accepted the supplies Emily offered her and looked at the blank page full of opportunities to express the things she didn't seem to have the words for.
"Where should I put this present for Henry?" Emily asked Dave who watched the two women with curiosity. Since Henry's birthday fell around the holiday, and JJ had steadily refused to allow herself to come close to her son until now, it seemed like an adequate time to celebrate the six-year-old's birthday.
"Oh, let me take it." Rossi offered kindly, hoping that his Thanksgiving dinner would go over without incident.
At the mention of her son, JJ closed her eyes, mentally picturing the image burned into her mind of her son's sweet angelic face.
Putting pencil to paper she began to draw. The entire world fell away as her pencil began sketching vague shapes as she blocked out an image that seemed burned in her mind.
Emily watched with a pang of a feeling she didn't know how to describe as she watched the blonde crouch over the paper protectively. Busying herself with preparations for Thnksgiving dinner, she sighed inwardly.
Maybe things weren't as bad as she thought.
Hours later, the food was finished and JJ slowly folded up the drawing, placing it in her pocket before Emily could glance at the depiction.
In Dave's giant dining room, the rest of the team sat, waiting uncomfortably as JJ and Emily stepped into the room with bowls and steaming food.
Dave gestured to the two seats near the exit that provided a clear view of the entire room. "I thought you and JJ could sit here." He explained softly. He had planned this for weeks, and honestly hoped that he had taken every one of JJ's needs into consideration.
Because he wanted it to be perfect.
He wasn't sure he could really admit to anyone other than himself that this party had sprung out of a late night realization that JJ likely hadn't experienced Thanksgiving or Christmas in three years.
Or any celebration, really.
In fact, it was the dream that had him waking in a cold sweat that was spurred by rereading Antonio Perez's confession that led him to call each member of the team and invite them to his cabin for Thanksgiving dinner and birthday celebration.
Because JJ deserved happy memories.
"Who would have thought David Rossi could turn into Father-Turkey?" Penelope whispered conspiratorially as JJ sat down beside her. Emily, spying the butter knife amid the various table settings quickly leaned over and without a word moved the knife out of the way.
Dinner conversation began, and it was initially light and easy, colored only slightly by mentions of the latest case and work implications.
Reid watched JJ closely, as if waiting for her to suffer a mental break at any moment.
"Emily, would JJ like peas?" Rossi asked, offering the large dish toward the brunette.
"Dave," Hotch scolded softly, unaware that his stern voice carried over to the two women while he loaded Jack's plate with thin slice of turkey, "you can talk to her. She's right there."
Emily accepted the peas and placed a large spoonful on JJ's plate, pretending she hadn't overheard Hotch's rebuke. Truthfully, she was grateful that Hotch had stepped in—because even an offhanded comment could set JJ's recovery back.
JJ stewed for a minute, grimacing as Emily heaped another spoonful of peas onto her plate.
She hated peas.
She'd always hated peas.
She stopped for a second, surprised at the memory of something before her capture. She knew her friends, she remembered her life before…
But she hadn't really thought of what she liked or didn't like.
She knew one thing for sure—she hated peas.
"I'm not good at all of this victim-talk." Rossi cringed, and smiled back at JJ and Emily.
Suddenly, JJ couldn't stand it anymore.
"I'm not a victim." JJ mumbled, so softly that only Garcia and Emily who were flanking JJ's sides could hear, but forcing the words out of her mouth.
At JJ's words, Penelope's fork clanged painfully as it fell out of her hands. Because all of them were sitting around.
And JJ hardly ever said anything.
At least not to her anymore.
Or anyone really.
Other than Emily.
"Did she just say something?" Morgan whispered across the table, equally surprised.
"What did she say?" Hotch asked from the other end of the table, worried at being seated so far away from the blonde.
JJ bit her lip and ducked her head, obviously uncomfortable with the attention from her colleagues.
"Prentiss, what'd she say?" Rossi asked.
Emily glared at both men before nudging JJ gently, "Say it again JJ." She encouraged. While part of her wanted to ream the other profilers for their insensitivity, she easily recognized the golden opportunity for JJ to at least attempt to assert herself.
JJ bit her lip hesitatingly before speaking up, only marginally louder than before. "Said, I'm not a victim."
Dave's face fell as he realized the blonde had indeed heard his comment. Truthfully, he was painfully aware that talking at JJ—talking to JJ—was not his forte. Not anymore.
He opened his mouth, hoping that by the grace of God some wise words would flow uncharacteristically out of his mouth. Instead, however, his mouth grew dry with the simple realization there was nothing he could say.
"You're right JJ." Rossi turned and addressed the woman directly, "You aren't a victim. I'm sorry."
JJ settled back into her seat and Emily beamed triumphantly.
Maybe Thanksgiving miracles weren't that hard to come by.
The room fell silent as Henry and Will slowly entered the large great room where the rest of the team was seated, every eye focused on the blonde on the opposite side of the room.
JJ froze at the sight of her former boyfriend and her son, but made no movements either way.
"Will." Hotch smiled, approaching the other man who had become a close friend. "It's good to see you."
"Good to see you too." Will muttered, his eyes locked on the blonde who seemed to stare straight through him.
Will stepped forward and JJ gasped, sending each person in the room on high alert. "Maybe it's best—" Hotch tried to stop him, but Will instinctively took a step back and held up his hands.
"JJ." He breathed, the relief flowing out of every pore of his body. He gulped down the emotion at seeing her again, and forced himself to speak. "I'm—" He stuttered painfully, "It's so good to see you."
JJ bit her fingernail nervously as she pulled her knees up to her chest tightly.
"Henry." Will choked, keeping himself from running toward the woman he longed for by sheer will, "He wanted to see you."
Emily stood to intercept Henry before he got to close to JJ, but Will sidestepped her. "Can he give you a hug?"
JJ shrunk back hesitatingly, but everyone in the room noticed the way she held back the sob that arose within her. Shaking her head reluctantly, she shrunk back in an attempt to draw a greater distance between herself and the people she loved more than life itself.
"I'll give it to her." Emily assured. Pasting a fake smile on her face, she smiled brightly down at the five-year-old boy. "Your mom got you a present too."
"Really?" Henry asked, his eyes wide and excited.
Emily nodded as she picked up the wrapped train set she had helped JJ pick out at the toy store, but was stopped by the soft voice that was almost drowned out by the soft whisperings of the others in the room. "No." Emily felt JJ's voice more than she heard it and stopped.
"I—" The blonde struggled, obviously juggling some emotion the others had no ability to comprehend. "I made—" She thrust the paper in her hands towards Henry, almost inviting him to approach her.
Almost.
Each eye watched with apprehension as Henry, obviously coached by his father, slowly approached the broken woman. Taking the picture out of her hands, his face broke into a wide grin. "That's me." He pointed at the picture with excitement.
JJ nodded, not bothering to wipe away the tears that were flowing freely down her face. "I—" Her heart yearned to express the love she had for this wonderful little boy.
But the words wouldn't form on her tongue.
And no matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't force them out. "I—" She tried again, growing frustrated at the chasm that still seemed to divide her from the rest of the world.
"She wants you to know she loves you." Emily supplied.
JJ frowned, imperceptibly to the others, but outwardly demonstrating the flash of annoyance that brewed within her. Why couldn't she say it?
She should be able to say it to Henry.
Any real mother would be able to.
Why couldn't she say it?
Henry smiled as he traced the picture in front of him in awe. Turning back to JJ, he jumped up on the couch next to her and embraced her in a tight hug.
"Henry!" Someone (possibly several someones) scolded as the entire group of profilers seemed to step forward in worried anticipation at JJ's possible reaction.
JJ paid them no mind as she closed her eyes and slowly returned the little boy's embrace. Tears cascaded down her cheeks at the touch of the little boy she loved more than anything else in this entire world. Whispering softly into his ears, she paid no mind to the profilers who tried to lean forward in an attempt to possibly censor the tender moment between mother and son.
After a moment, Henry pulled away and nodded at JJ before kissing his mother lightly on the cheek. "Okay. I promise."
Retreating back to his father's side, he smiled widely. "Do I do good?" He asked his father shyly.
"You did great." Will's voice cracked.
Emily swallowed down the lump in her throat at witnessing the genuine moment between JJ and Henry. Since JJ's rescue she had seen herself as JJ's protector. Now she wondered if she had become the little child who tried to help a chick hatch, only to cripple the developing chicken.
Sometimes adversity made you stronger.
And other times it just kicked your ass.
"What did your mom tell you?" Hotch whispered to the little boy curiously, frowning at the way JJ looked away guiltily as if she had violated some unwritten rule.
Henry shook his head, glancing down at the picture in his hands. "It's a secret, Uncle Hotch." He implored as if it was the most obvious explanation in the world. "Is that other present for me too?" He asked excitedly.
Aware that every eye in the room was watching her intently, Emily smiled and tried to speak. However, no words came out.
Surprisingly, it was Spencer who stepped forward and patted Henry on the back, "Of course you can have the other present too." He soothed, "But we've got cake and ice cream too. You like ice cream, right Henry?" He asked feigning confusion.
Henry grinned broadly. "I love ice cream Uncle Spencer."
"Then it's a party, isn't it." Reid mused, glancing over at JJ and feeling the unsettled turmoil finally starting to dissipate.
JJ wasn't his mother. And though it pained him to see her so hurt, maybe he could deal with this better than he thought he could.
By no means was he ready to be at JJ's side 24-7, he could barely be at his own mother's side for that long.
But it was a start.