Note: Sorry for the wait! Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed; there are some reviews I wanted to reply to in this very chapter, but I've decided I'll save the replies for the next one, because they will make more sense then. Still, thank you guys, again! This is the last short chapter of this fic, I think. Every remaining chapter will be way longer. I can't remember what else I meant to say, so read away!
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Chapter 10: Sasuke's clan
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Karin spends most of the night tossing and turning, sleep a luxury that dodged her grasp almost until the first birds began to chirp, their tune signaling that the sun would soon rise. Even then all she manages is a poor imitation of slumber, restless and skintight, molding after the careworn beatings of her heart and thus feeling more suffocating rather than relieving.
Her thoughts kept her preoccupied, echoes of later, Karin that felt closer than they should and vivid to a point that was almost cruel. Her confusion blurred the usual clear-cut paths of her thoughts and her sleep-deprival slowed her down—and so the result is no surprise.
It is, however, rotten-luck that she arrives to the field ten minutes later than usual precisely that morning, when she had meant to arrive extra early to try and talk to Sasuke about what had happened yesterday—whatever it had been—and it's even worse luck how Kakashi, in an unusual display of promptness, was already sparring with Sasuke upon the redhead's arrival.
Karin can't help but sigh, dropping her bag and feeling utterly defeated as she sat down on the ground, eyes morosely trailing the movements of the two shinobi, her insides feeling weightier by the second.
… And Sasuke just would not look at her.
If he were to be honest with himself, Sasuke would acknowledge that he felt rather… stupid, for having left Karin the way he had yesterday.
It had been childish of him; a reaction too raw to pertain to a shinobi and entirely too juvenile to pertain to an avenger. And if Sasuke were a little more in touch with his emotions—or at least with the set that did not have anything to do with hate and ambition and annoyance and the likes—he would also realize what was the uncomfortable sting puncturing his abdomen from time to time at the thought of the redhead's hesitant Sasuke…?
As things were though, Sasuke was good at lying to himself; and so he liked to pretend he was even better at being detached from his emotions—but despite that he could not quite ignore that rather than feeling wronged, as he usually would have in normal circumstances, he felt like he had been the one in the wrong.
Sure, her comment had made him uncomfortable. Had made him remember the things he once had and that he now lacked.
But it was not as if she had made him feel that way on purpose. It was not a case of Karin being immature and selfish and inconsiderate like so many people he knew, but rather a case of Karin simply not knowing any better. It was true that there was some kind of… affinity, between the redhead and him. He could acknowledge that much; she seemed to get him in a primitive way that he was not entirely used to. But she was no mind-reader, and she had no means to look into his past and understand there were things that were better left untouched when he was around.
Idly, Sasuke wonders if maybe he should tell her about what happened to his clan.
He is musing precisely about that subject when Kakashi arrives to the field, and once the Uchiha has gotten over his surprise he is thankful that it was the jounin and not the girl who had arrived first.
Training always helped to clear his mind, and with every punch or kick he threw at Kakashi he could feel the thought of telling Karin about his past dissipating for the best.
Karin was a good girl. If she were to know about his clan her red eyes would unknowingly give him the same looks full of sympathy and concern that the whole village has been giving him for years.
The sole thought made his blood boil and his eyes twitch, annoyance pumping his adrenaline and causing his taijutsu to speed up.
He needed none of that. He did not need nor want anyone's pity or sympathy.
He was Uchiha Sasuke, sole survivor of the Uchiha clan, and an avenger. He was proud to be so. He had no time to feel sorry for himself.
"Focus, Sasuke," Kakashi instructs, cleanly evading Sasuke's every hit. "Your speed is okay, but your attacks aren't coordinated."
"Tch!"
He needed to get stronger. If he did not, he would not be able to take on Itachi and he had to—maybe then everyone would stop seeing him as the kid who had lost everything and would start seeing him for what he truly was.
An avenger.
A flash of red catches his eye and he allows his eyes to briefly dart past Kakashi and in its direction—Karin had arrived, and was looking at them with resigned eyes.
Karin… the Uchiha thinks almost without realizing it, redoubling his efforts against a Kakashi who was starting to return his attacks with some taijutsu of his own. There are things you are better off not knowing about me.
Despite Karin's best intentions, things between them do not improve much throughout the rest of the morning. When Sasuke wasn't too busy training, Karin herself was too focused on the leaf—the stupid leaf who somehow seemed even more still than yesterday. And when Karin was not trying to concentrate on her chakra instead of thinking about the Uchiha, Sasuke was discussing with Kakashi about ways to improve his taijutsu.
They had even had their lunches at different times. Karin had caught Kakashi giving them curious glances once or twice, but the man had not asked and Karin had not found in herself the will to talk.
The sun sets and Karin can count the amount of words they have said to each other on the fingers of one hand. It is a discouraging thought, one that makes Karin's shoulders slouch as she and Sasuke come to stand before Kakashi so that the man can officially dismiss the day's training session.
"To put it bluntly, you two didn't progress much today," he states dispassionately, and both Karin and Kakashi alike are surprised when Sasuke does not utter a single complaint. "It is not due to a lack of aptitudes, however; rather, you weren't focusing. I don't know what's keeping the two of you preoccupied, but you should work on setting it before tomorrow… Or need I remind you that you have only two days left to clear this phase?"
"…We're sorry, Kakashi-san," Karin murmurs, head hung low and bangs covering her eyes. She felt ashamed of having let her feelings obstruct her progress to the point where it had warranted a warning from Kakashi, to whom she owed so much.
A few feet to her left Sasuke simply gives a noncommittal drawl in response, also looking down and making no effort to detangle himself from Karin's apologies. It is this fact that makes Kakashi inwardly smile, wondering if Sasuke had even realized it himself.
"I'll let it pass, just this time. But I expect you two to be at your very best tomorrow, is that understood?" once he receives an eager nod from Karin and a nonchalant one from Sasuke, the man continues, "Well, that would be all for today. You two are free to leave now."
Karin shifts, her gaze immediately traveling to Sasuke, who was kneeling down and grabbing his water-bottle from the ground. She is wondering if she should try and talk to him when Kakashi suddenly makes his way towards the Uchiha.
"Oh, by the way, Sasuke,"
The aforementioned boy raises his face only to have a package pushed onto his hands. His widened eyes look at it and then at his teacher, whose eye is creased with a smile.
"Happy Birthday!"
Kakashi announces, and before Sasuke could even get a single word out the man has poof'ed away without a trace, leaving a flabbergasted Sasuke staring at empty space and a slack-jawed Karin who is too busy staring at him.
"Huh? It's your birthday, Sasuke?"
She exclaims, startling the boy out of his thoughts. He takes a look at the approaching redhead before lowering his stare to the package again, a pensive look taking over his features. "… I guess."
Karin stares down at him, curiously. He really did look like he had forgotten all about his birthday. Karin does not understand how someone could do that, though; you were only born once, after all. But she also gets the feeling that even though she would like to wish him a happy birthday, doing so would not be appropriate. Something in the way his eyebrows were thinly drawn together as he stared down at the gift told her so.
So she dismisses her congratulations in favor of a different question. "How old are you turning?"
"Thirteen," Sasuke replies easily, and Karin's loud gasp makes him look away from the present and into her eyes. She was crouched by his side now, her widened gaze set straight into his. "… What is it?"
"I… I'm older than you!" she discloses, and there's a mixture between hilarity and embarrassment lighting up her features and voice. Sasuke himself can't help but to feel vaguely astonished by the revelation. Now that was something he had not seen coming. "I mean, not by much, but still! I turned thirteen a month ago."
"Hn… is that so?" an amused smile curves up a corner of his lips and Karin grins back, lightly smacking his arm in protest. The awkwardness that had come between them since yesterday night seemed to be thoroughly forgotten in favor of their usual camaraderie.
"Keep your comments to yourself, will you?" she mock-warns, eyes twinkling, and Sasuke humors her by not hiding the amusement from his eyes as they hold her own.
"Heh, awfully defensive, aren't we?" he retorts, and Karin chuckles before moving her gaze towards the present lying forgotten in Sasuke's hands.
"Aren't you going to open it?"
The smile slips from his face like melting wax, marking the return of that pensive look of his. Karin tilts her head to the side in wonderment, but Sasuke pays her no heed, simply opting for opening the package instead. Once he cuts through the tape with the help of a kunai, he removes the lid only to reveal a set of beige arm-warmers.
"Whoa, cool!" Karin exclaims, appreciatively. The set Kakashi had gotten Sasuke was not nearly as long as the ones the Uchiha usually wore, being more apt for the elbow rather than the forearm, but they were made of thicker material, which showed that they were meant to serve as protection.
"Hn… that Kakashi," Sasuke muttered, staring down at the warmers. "… He is always doing unnecessary stuff."
He may not look the part but Karin noticed a softer note coloring his words, and this knowledge is visible in the smile she gives him. "…But it's a tradition to give presents to people on their birthday, isn't it?"
Sasuke remains still for a moment, but then he shrugs, placing the lid back on the package. "I don't care for my birthday. We should head back, Karin."
"Right."
Karin remains outwardly unaffected, but inwardly it's another story altogether. Inwardly, she is wondering what could have caused Sasuke to stop caring about such an important date. Karin, who did not consider herself as someone who particularly cared about traditions, could not help but to always get excited about her birthday; it wasn't the presents—though those did play a part on it, of course—but rather her parents those who made her look forward to the date every year. Her dad would take the day off and spend it with Karin and her mother, and Karin would get to pick what place they would be visiting. It had become a tradition for them, one that never ceased to be full of fun memories for the redhead.
Weren't Sasuke's parents like that, too? Maybe they were too busy to be able to celebrate it with him…?
The thought makes her recall the way Sasuke had reacted back on the roof, and Karin can't help but blink, finally noticing the common thread between the two occasions.
Both were family-related.
There's something wrong there, Karin thinks, uneasily. Something was definitely wrong.
But despite that realization Karin says nothing, asks nothing. She simply rushes through the woods behind Sasuke, her eyes boring into his back as she tried to tell herself that she was not becoming increasingly bothered by all the mysteries surrounding the boy.
Unknown to her, the Uchiha feels the weight of her stare all too clearly, and it is not hard for him to take a wild guess at just what was weighting it down. It was only natural for Karin to wonder why he dismissed his birthday with such easiness, and if she were to get annoyed at him and think that he was being a prick for not caring, well… that would be only natural, too.
Still, Sasuke feels thankful.
He feels thankful to Karin, because despite all the questions she may have had the redhead had not gone all Happy Birthday! on him—not even once. She had tactfully avoided doing so, and Sasuke was glad for that because to him there was nothing memorable about the day. Nothing happy about it at all.
It just served to remind him of how lonely he was.
"We part here, Karin."
Karin halts half-a-step ahead of him and turns to give him an inquiring look over her shoulder. Sasuke simply points towards the street extending towards the left with a bony finger. "I'm going that way," he says, and then seems to think better of it and adds: "I have something to do."
"Oh, okay. See you tomorrow then, Sasuke."
"Yeah," Sasuke says, offering a slight nod as his goodbye.
Karin looks at his departing back for a few seconds before going her own way, her eyes thoughtfully darting from store to store.
She still had lots of unanswered questions, and it was also true she did not quite know—yet—what she wanted to do about them. But she did know that she wanted to get Sasuke something; if not for his birthday, then at least for everything he has done for her.
The problem was: what could she possible get him? Sasuke seemed like the practical-kind of guy, so giving him something that could help him in his training or in his duties as a shinobi seemed like the right thing to do. Equipment was, however, quite expensive. And Karin, not knowing she would be staying in Konoha for a whole month rather than just for a couple of days, had not brought the enough money to spare like that.
She heaves a sigh. Honestly, if only there was something not so expensive… something she could make, maybe, rather than buy…
"Aw, their flowers are always so beautiful!"
"I know, right? I bought a bouquet just last week!"
… Flowers?
Karin halts and turns only to face a shop-window; one that revealed nothing but flowers. Colorful flowers of all kinds and colors covering every bit of space as far as the eye could see.
Her eyes widen hopefully, her cheeks becoming rosy out of excitement.
Of course! How could she have forgotten about her hobby? Granted it had been only recently that she had started to make them rather than solely buy them, but it was something she enjoyed dearly and she had improved a great deal, hadn't she?
Plus, finding the right ingredients to make it should not be that hard or that expensive. The key was to be always mindful of the aromas and of how well they blended together.
And Karin had a keen nose. She has always had.
She allows a happy grin to adorn her features.
It was settled, she would be making a perfume for the young Uchiha!
So focused is Karin on that thought that she forgets to look at the pink announcement that revealed the name of the flower shop she was just about to enter. Had she done so, she would have realized it was called Yamanaka Flowers, and as such the shop's attendant may not have come as that much of a shock.
As things were though, she has only given one step inside when her expression becomes one of surprise as her eyes land on the all-too-familiar, bored-looking blonde sitting behind the counter with her chin propped on one hand.
"Oh, it's you!" is Yamanaka Ino's greeting, a welcoming grin stretching her rosy lips and lighting up her pretty features. "I didn't know you were still in Konoha!"
Karin gives the cheerful blonde a reticent nod in response, still not being quite used to the girls' outgoing ways. "Hello—"
"Ino," Ino supplies, grinning still. "Yamanaka Ino, at your service!"
There's something contagious in the girls' smile and so Karin finds herself returning it with pleasure, her cheeks warming up and her shoulders relaxing. "Karin. It's a pleasure to meet you, Ino-san."
Karin's manners steal a giggle out of Ino, who dismisses the redhead's greeting with a graceful wave of her hand. "No need to be so formal. We're the same age, aren't we?" Propping her chin up on her palm again, Ino gives Karin a curious look from under her long lashes. "Heh, so what brings you here? Are you looking for any flower in particular?"
"Ah, kind of…" Karin says, absentmindedly. Something in the counter had caught her eye; there was a package lying atop of it, near the cashier. It was wrapped in pretty grays and blues and had a thin red lace around it, finishing on a nice-looking bow atop of the package.
It was a present. A funny feeling tells Karin just to whom it was meant, but the redhead says nothing of it.
"Do you need some help?"
Karin tears her gaze away from the present only to notice that Ino was beginning to stand up, so she hurries to shake her head and make her way to the nearest flower exhibition. "Don't worry, it's okay! I'll just look around to see what I can find."
"You sure?" the blonde looks unconvinced for a moment, but Karin's smile sends her into another one of her joyful grins. "Heh, fine by me, then! If you want to know any prices, just ask!"
"Sure!"
Just as Karin was getting started on her task, carefully observing the wide array of flowers and trying to remember their names and properties, a thoughtful-sounding Ino calls her back. "Hey, Karin… have you by any chance seen Sasuke-kun lately?"
The question comes out of the blue, and Karin cannot help the way her back stiffens upon hearing it. For a moment she wants to say the truth; she has seen him. Every day, as a matter of fact.
But then she remembers all too clearly the way Sasuke had avoided his pink-haired teammate the day before and Karin knows at once that saying the truth was not a right that pertained to her.
"…No, not really," she lies, not once allowing her eyes to dart towards Ino, who heaves a discouraged sigh.
"I see…."
Sensing that the blonde had believed her and that the danger was seemingly gone, Karin steals a look at the counter from the corner of her eye, still pretending to be absorbed in her search for the perfect flowers. "… Why are you looking for him, Ino?"
The question comes out sounding curious and innocent enough, something that Karin is thankful for, as Ino does not seem to suspect anything as she goes onto replying: "Today's his birthday, y'know? I got him a present and everything, so I wanted to give it to him."
The blonde subconsciously gives a faraway look to the gift laying atop of the counter, and Karin can't help the I knew it! that goes off in her head. Any thoughts pertaining to the matter evaporate however, as Ino's lips curve into a grin that to Karin looks more like a grimace.
"… No that it would make much of a difference, anyway," the blonde says, and while her tone is deliberately kept light and carefree it does not quite manage to disguise her concern. "Sasuke-kun never opens anything anyone gets him."
Karin blinks, fully turned towards Ino now. "Huh? How come?"
Ino shrugs. "I don't know. I don't get it myself. But I guess it has something to do with what happened to his clan and all…" she trails of, and in her silence Karin feels her blood running cold.
Don't ask a voice frantically tells her.
Don't ask! You have no right to know!
Her heart is suddenly beating painfully slowly and dreadfully loudly, loudly enough to swallow down the complaints of that shrill, insecure voice that had tried to make her hesitate.
"What… happened to his clan, Ino?"
Her voice is hoarse, but if Ino notices she says nothing of it. Instead her blue eyes sharpen with realization and shadows fall over her features. "Right… you don't know anything about it, do you?" Karin shakes her head ever so slowly, fearing that if she were to make a sudden movement the world around her would start to spin. She almost wants to take her question back, almost wants to get away before Ino has the chance to explain.
But the blonde is faster than Karin is to decide and her grave words keep the redhead glued to her spot.
"Sasuke-kun's whole clan was murdered a couple of years ago. Sasuke-kun was the only survivor… he was just seven when it happened…. Rumors say it was Sasuke-kun's own—" Ino suddenly stops herself, looking startled. A long, eerie silence transpires between them until Ino manages to school her features into a kind smile, which she offers to Karin as tacit apology for letting her in such a dark subject. "But those are just rumors, nothing you need to concern yourself with!"
Karin nods and turns her gaze back to the flowers, but she is not quite looking at them anymore. Her gaze is unfocused and her thoughts are in disarray.
Truth is, she feels terrible. She desperately wants to get away from there and just sit down and try and swallow down everything Ino had just said, because she just could not wrap her mind around any of it. She just could not.
It just… it could not be possibly true, right? For Sasuke—for Sasuke to have gone through all that… it just could not be, right?
Unknown to Karin, Ino's blue eyes are set on her. It's all too easy for the blonde to notice how thoughtful and troubled the other girl was, and she feels partly responsible for it; feels like she should attempt to cheer her up just like she does to Sakura whenever the girl went into one of her I'm-worried-about-Sasuke-kun modes. But… truth is, right then Ino did not feel like she was capable of cheering anyone up. Not even herself.
Her eyes travel to the present she had carefully wrapped for Sasuke and she absentmindedly reaches out to trace the red lace with her fingertips.
"…I guess I'll just drop it at his house," she says forlornly, almost not realizing she was speaking aloud. "It won't do any good, but at least he'll know I thought about him, right?"
It takes Karin a great deal of effort, but Ino has been kind and friendly from the get-go and she feels she owes her that much. So it is mustering all her strength that she offers the blonde an encouraging smile—which thankfully does not falter.
"Yeah, you should do that."
That night as she walks back to the inn, bags full of flowers and other implements in her hands, Karin feels like she understands it all.
Sasuke's complex nature and the different sides of his personality; the kind, the cold, the forlorn, his cockiness and his determination—everything. It was like a puzzle that had been missing a piece, but now Karin had them all—or at least she had enough to get the big picture. And the big picture left her heart aching and brimming with emotions that she could not quite name.
She feels like the biggest of idiots for what she had ignorantly told him yesterday. It was no wonder Sasuke had reacted the way he had—if anything, he had been too understanding.
Gripping the handbags more tightly, Karin decides she will put her all into the perfume. Sasuke was not the kind to wear perfumes, but that was fine. If she could at least make something good enough to make him smile then that would be more than enough for her.
An aroma that would remind him that he was not alone, even if he felt like he was.
It's hard to not feel alone, sometimes, Karin thinks, her mind replaying bittersweet memories.
Sometimes it was hard to be reached by people. Sometimes you turned your backs on them without meaning to, and sometimes they turned their backs on you without realizing it. Sometimes you were so busy dwelling on your own problems that you did not realize that there were people who cared reaching out to you.
But aromas always penetrated. Always. There were no walls firm enough to keep them away, for every wall had a creak—and that was all an aroma needed to penetrate. The smallest of fissures would be enough, and then the isolated area would not be quite as empty anymore.
Would not be quite as lonely.
Karin smiles, softly.
Sasuke had been the one to bang on her walls, without even realizing it. Now it was her turn to pay him in kind.
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End of the 10th Chapter
Transitional chapter is transitional, but I wanted to keep this as light as possible since the important scenes will all be in the next chapter. That is also the reason why I did not want to dwell on Karin's reaction to the revelation of what happened to Sasuke's clan; plus it would be kind of morbid considering that the same thing is going to happen to her eventually.
I think this chapter reflects well that while naturally and instinctively wise and keen, this Karin is still retains some innocence and naivety due to her upbringing, which makes the way she looks at the world be a bit different from the Karin we all know. But this will begin to change very soon.
That said, I think Ino and Karin would get along really well, so I couldn't help but to want to explore that. As for Ino knowing about Itachi in here, it is due to Inoichi, who let it slip once. Lol
For those wondering what Sasuke had to do, he is paying his respects to his parents. I was going to write it in but then I realized I was not completely sure of where are their bodies. So I preferred to leave the scene out.
Next Chapter: Sasuke and Karin.