Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! :D
I'm back at school, but I have a goal to upload at least once a week. However, the chaps may be a bit shorter.
Also, I would like to remind everyone that this story is SUPPOSE to be a bit silly. Of course dramatic things will occur, but my characters aren't fussy and dramatic. Hence, their reactions are going to be a bit loopy.
Anyways…enjoy!
EPOV
A baby? A fucking baby? As in I stick mine in hers and we produce a baby?
Like a legitimate, living, breathing, walking, growing, blubbering, slobbering, REAL kid?
"Eddie, are you still with me?" Alice waves her petite hand over my shell shocked face.
"Am I alright? Am I alright?" I ask deliriously, chuckling. "Of course I AM alright. The question is: Are YOU alright? Because I would almost bet my millions that you've gone loony tune crazy."
"You're such a child, Edward!"
"And you're a…." Alice shoots me a death glare and I gulp.
"That's what I thought." She warns, down casting her eyes on my trembling bones. "Anywho, moving on to the situation at hand, will you give me your sperm or not?"
"Fuck, Ally. You sure know how to downplay a situation!" I claw at my head, plucking a couple strands of red hair in the process.
"And you know how to exaggerate the simplest of requests!"
"Simple? You're asking me to create another human life with you! How does the validity of that not connect with your fashion-crazed brain?" I demand.
"Oh, spare me, Eddie." I swear to God himself that if she dares refer to me as "Eddie" again I'll tear her womb right out of her- that will eliminate the baby predicament too. Talk about killing two birds with three stones….or however that saying goes.
"I have discussed with a doctor, Dr. Hale to be exact, and I'm willing to explore a different route than traditional baby-making."
"Perhaps you should just adopt?" I advise. Hell, I'm almost willing to do the entire process for her if it will end the insanity!
"Ugh…adopting is just so…impersonal." Ally shudders.
"Hey! I'm adopted!" Jake hollers, entering the kitchen without warning.
Hence I scream. A chick-like yelp.
"Dude, seriously?" Jake's eyes dilate to the size of saucers.
"Erm…Sorry?" I offer awkwardly. The kid has ninja skills I tell you! There was no quack in the floorboards to announce his lurking.
"No I am sorry. Do you have any idea how many YouTube hits I would have gotten if I had recorded that little outburst of yours?" Jake chuckles. "At least next time I know to bring my camera."
My face turns ten shades of red. I would DEFINITELY never live that down in the public.
Oblivious- or uncaring- to my worried expression, Jake grabs a bottle of Sunny D and skips- once AGAIN- to the living room.
Great, now I have ANOTHER thing on my list of worries.
"Okay, as I was getting at, I would like to give our kids another biological child." Alice says with a huff, annoyed she was interrupted.
"Between Bella and me, and you and whoever you end up with, they will have plenty of siblings." I reason.
"That's not what I mean, Edward…." Alice glances down.
"Look Ally, we've had our go. There's no compromise on this one. You and I are done with procreating. Enough said." I kiss her forehead before exiting the room. I was burning to know the reason behind her pleads, but I know Alice- the only way to conclude a topic is to refuse to acknowledge it.
"Edward stop it…I'm trying to watch the show!" Bella whines as I nip on her earlobe.
"Fuck it. You know I'm way more entertaining than this show. If you can even call it that…" I mumble.
BAD idea!
Bella introduces me to her right hook, feeling the need to reprimand me for lacking interest in the shit feast that is Gossip Girl.
"How dare YOU." She scolds.
"C'mon Bella, this show is for teenagers."
"I AM a teenager dipshit." Screw her and her logic!
I groan and roll off of her delicate- but dangerously sexy- little body.
"Babe, can't you just Tivo it? I don't pay an extra thirty bucks for that thing for it not to be used."
"Ugh, how many times must we go through this? It's NOT the same watching it when it's a recording."
"You have no problem with watching the DVDs-repeatedly." I groan.
"Yeah, but that's different." She shrugs her shoulders as if that justifies everything.
"But the same exact thing happens every single episode. Chuck and Blair break up because he acts like an ass. Then, they realize they can't live without one another and reunite. Meanwhile, Serena and Dan flirt with each other shamelessly, but never hook up because another love interest stumbles on by. Rufus is oblivious to half of his surroundings, and Lily deceives everyone "lovingly". As for Nate…well he's just there." I recap.
"OH babe, you know all their names! Yay!" She squeals and gives me a slobberish kiss on the mouth.
I seize the opportunity to charm the pants right off of her- literally.
"Mhm, indeed. So…what points do I earn for that?" I deliberately place my hand directly over her pussy.
"Hmmm…I'm sure we can think of some way to repay you for your utter brilliance." She taunts.
Five minutes later, and I'm balls deep inside of her- finally.
"Edward, right there…mmm…yeah…a little to the- oh God!" Bella moans out as I pound into her mercilessly.
"You like that, ah?" I lick her pert nipple.
She moans her approval.
Faster than she can chant my full fucking name, I flip her on to her stomach and push her flat down. Her tiny fingers dig into the innocent sheets, poking a hole through the fabric, as I lift her ass and enter her.
Usually, I'm more attentive, but I've found my dick gives Bella all the pleasure she needs to climax in this particular position. Hence, I thrust every single inch of my dick into her tight pussy in a frenzied manner. Sex consumes my brain and I go even faster, so much so I'm concerned I may be hurting Bella. After all, her vagina is still relatively new to being worshipped with such onslaughts. However, Bella's throaty moans and the movements of her hips alert to me that everything is A-Okay.
The sweat builds up tremendously, and my chest collapses onto Bella's back. Luckily, this does not deter my movements. The intensity I'm feeling actually increases- if that's even possible.
Bella orgasms for the third time of the night and I speed up. I recognize her pussy must be extremely sensitive by now; therefore, I do everything I can to cum quickly.
And when I do, it's the best climax of my thirty-two years.
Currently, it's two in the morning on Saturday night. Bella, Jake, and I are indulging in a movie night.
In reality, Alice is on a date. A fucking DATE. With Dr. Hale. Who dates their physician? I mean c'mon?Anyways, I am waiting up in hopes of catching a glance at this date of hers. At the start of the evening, I had PUSHED Alice out the door. Sianara Bitch!
BUT that was before Jake felt the need to recount horror stories of what happens when a new daddy comes into children's lives. No way was I going to be replaced! I needed to gauge the situation desperately- scope out my competition for Daddy of the Year.
Bella and I are snuggled up on the couch, with Jake lounging nearby on the arm chair- MY arm chair. Shesh, I'm not always so territorial, but damn it- that's my chair! Every man is entitled to his very own comfy chair that he can relax in. But noooo…Jakey is the guest so I have to share. According to Bella anyways.
According to me that's pure bull shit.
The sting wouldn't cause so much pain if only Jake wasn't throwing me smug looks every five seconds. I glare at him in response- it's so ON.
Abruptly, we all hear the sounds of two women giggling in the hallway.
Hmmm….
As I click a possibility in my head, I hold onto Bella closely. Shit! Please, please, don't let it be one of those psycho stalkers who call themselves fans! Fans adore you and RESPECT you. Stalkers hound you and make you feel threatened. HUGE difference.
I grab a bat and tip toe to the front entrance. I stop dead in my tracks.
There's Alice holding hands and sharing loving gazes with a young-looking woman.
She jumps when she notices me staring at her and the blonde beauty accompanying her.
"Jesus, Edward! You scared me!" Alice giggled.
Alice+ giggling= WHAT THE HELL AM I MISSING?
Blondie clears her throat and Alice composes herself.
"Rosalie, this is my ex-husband, Edward." I give a nod at Blo-Rosalie, still confused.
"Edward, this is Rosalie. My date." She empathizes the last sentence, with a pointed look.
Her date?...
HUH!
Wow! I did not think I'd be able to finish this so quickly!
It was quite fun to write. I hope it was just as fun to read!
I promise for more Bella/Edward action in the next chapters. You have more word that the rest of the story will be more focused on them. =)
So….what do you think?
PLEASE REVIEW!
I'd appreciate at least 15 reviews before I get the next chapter up.