Here I am! Here's chap. 15! Hope you like it, still I think I kinda suck at writing drama... anyway, enjoy it! :)

Feelings

Peace reigned around the homestead. Snow was beginning to fall, the cold, chilly air taking over the whole place. The white substance barely covered the ground and house's roofs. Loggers were recollecting wood, for they knew the winter was starting.

So cold…

The small fire that decorated the dark and cold forest was dying - slowly fading, each second becoming weaker.

You did know it was a bad idea to agree with Myriam's plan. But at the end, you had ended up even helping her to set up the camp.

The huntress had had the great idea of celebrating the coming winter. Everyone at the homestead had almost automatically agreed. Even Achilles, who was reluctant at first, was present.

All of you were seated around the small fire. Chatting, joking, and talking. How you missed days like those. You would hang out with the few friends you had, you would tell horror stories to each other, you would play scary games, and you would enjoy the other's company.

What you were doing didn't differ that much from what you used to do. You were there with your friends, having fun. You truly felt as if you belonged there.

Connor was busy talking with his friend. The Assassin had gone as far as to even travel to Kanatahséton to invite Kanen'tó:kon. The Mohawk had immediately agreed, he even brought some of his friends, including a pair of girls.

You didn't mind that. On the contrary, you were happy the Assassin was having fun with his friends, what you did mind, however, was her.

Na'estse. She was almost clinging at Connor. Sure, you had done it one or two times, but that was different!

What you couldn't bear was that the Assassin didn't seem the least bothered by her. He had been so stoic with you the first time. Maybe before coming to the homestead he had been friends with her?

He was sitting next to Kanen'tó:kon, who was holding hands with who you guessed was his fiancé, Niaran. And clinging to Connor was Na'estse, her face so close to Connor's you knew he could feel her breathing. They were speaking in Kanien'kehá:ka, and it pissed you of that you could not understand anything.

"So," Myriam mumbled in your ear and you almost jumped from your perch next to Diana.

"Do you want me to have a heart attack or something?!" You snapped at her. That was so not necessary.

She shrugged. "You were so lost in your thoughts that it would've been a loss not to scare you."

Dam huntress!

"What you want?" You were not in the mood. You would go through heaven and hell, but at the end, you were going to admit that you were jealous.

Lately, you and Connor had become closer, and you thought that the weird relationship was finally going somewhere, but then a stupid Mohawk girl appears and screws everything!

Life's not fair.

Never has been, girl.

"Well, I have some beer, want some?"

You nodded. Why not? At least you should try having fun yourself. Not that you weren't but…

Oh, who were you kidding?

You were so not having fun having Mrs. Clingy around your Assassin all the time.

You had spent more time with him than she had done; you had advantage in that field. An irritated and loud sight left your lips. Your cheeks blushing darkly when you realized you had drawn everyone's attention. Everyone's attention except Connor's, Kanen'tó:kon and the couple of native American girls. Those four were so concentrated in talking they wouldn't hear a ship exploding next to them.

Well, fuck.

"Are you okay, little missy?" Dave asked. He looked at you with curious eyes, expecting an answer.

Answer he wouldn't get.

"I think is time for me to go,"

Everyone looked at you; serious yet doubtful expression.

"What do you mean?!" It was Myriam who dared to yell. "It's like ten in the night, beginning winter, and you are planning on going? Alone?!"

Fine, it was not one the smartest ideas. You did not fear any redcoats, you knew they didn't trespass the frontier, however you had to fear the wild animals. Cougars, bears, wolves… Anything could attack you.

"No, I am not going alone…" You gulped. "Uh…" Nope, Connor was still too busy.

"I can take you." Norris offered. He had previously asked you for advice on how to gain Myriam and he felt as if he owed you, which he didn't because your plans had all failed. Myriam was definitely not the type who liked flowers… nor chocolates.

"Really? Thank you!"

At least someone was there for you.

Norris smiled at Myriam and said his goodbyes. You stood up and did the same before starting to walk with Norris.

The walk was silent, but not uncomfortable. You appreciated Norris's company. He was a good man, by all means.

The dark forest and the cold wind of the coming winter helped you calm down a little.

A knot in your throat formed as you walked. You were not being fair with the Assassin. Perhaps he felt more comfortable around his kind than around you. And you understood. Even though he had told you, assured even, that you were a part of his family, you felt like an outsider. A down hearting feeling, but it was there.

Connor was someone different. He had built up very tall walls around him, around his persona, his truly self. Walls you knew you had, through the years, managed to crack, but not to break. He was reserved, and rarely outspoken when it came down to his feelings.

He was confused, you were sure. His feelings were like an endless vortex. Sometimes he knew what he felt; other times… other times he did not know how he felt.

He was so close to you, but at the same time, he was so far away.

"We're here,"

You had not noticed the scenery change. You hadn't even noticed you were standing in front of the poorly lit homestead, but Norris' voice echoed through your ears.

"Oh, right. Thank you." At least you had made it safely. No wolves, no cougars, no nothing.

"If you want to talk, here I am." The miner said. His tone was honest, genuine. His tick French accent laced with friendliness.

A small smile came to your face. He really knew how to cheer you up. "I know Norris. Thank you." Myriam didn't have any idea of what a great man had fallen for her.

His lips curled upwards too. "Don't worry. See you tomorrow, maybe?"

"Sure." You opened the door and turned around to say your good byes to Norris. "Please, be safe."

He nodded, waving his hand and walking back to his home, or maybe even to the camp?

You stood at the door frame, watching Norris walk away. Why everything had to be so complicated when one talked about Connor Kenway?

You closed the door behind you once you stepped inside the homestead. The only light on was the one at the hall, even so, the house felt obscure, sinister, empty.

You didn't bother in turning on more lights; the obscure aura was fine.

You didn't even go to your room. You walked slowly towards the living room, stopping right in front of the panoramic window. All you could see was darkness.

The door opening startled you, rushed voices met your ears, but a loud relief sigh left your lips when you recognized the tall silhouette of certain man.

"That was scary," You admitted.

"Why did you leave?" His voice sounded concerned, but there was a hint of something else hidden in his tone. You knew the other three Mohawks were with him, you didn't want to argue with Connor, not at that moment.

"I was sleepy." You offered. It was not completely true, but it was the best excuse you could make at the moment.

"You could've told me." He said.

Kanen'tó:kon was wise enough to turn on the lights of the living room, Niaran and Na'estse standing carefully behind him.

Connor's gaze was posed on you, sharp hazel eyes glaring slightly at you, your own [e/c] eyes widened, and you wondered how he had found your eyes amidst the dark environment.

"Uh, Connor," Kanen'tó:kon ventured, knowing his friend was having a silent argument with you, and the least thing he wanted was to interrupt, but he felt he needed to smooth things.

The Assassin half-turned his face, so he could see both, Kanen'tó:kon and you. "Yes?" His voice was calmed, but his face suggested otherwise. He was irritated, angry, annoyed. Mostly because you had not told him that you wanted to leave. You had preferred to go with Norris, and he felt kind of betrayed.

"I am sure we can figure things out in the morning, for now is better if we all rest," Kanen'tó:kon said, his words getting you out of trouble.

"He is right, Ratonhnhaké:ton." Niaran said. "There is no point in arguing over a trivial thing. I am sure [Name] just didn't want to disturb you. That must be the reason why she left without telling anybody,"

Well, you did tell everybody, those four just weren't paying attention, but Niaran had a point, and you were starting to like her.

"Yeah, so, good ni-"

"Where are we staying?" Na'estse's voice interrupted you. You had almost forgotten she was there-

WAIT! Did she just ask where were they staying?

Sure, it was almost midnight, but… come on! You were not going to share your bed with anybody! Unless…

Anybody means anybody. Focus, [Name], focus.

"Achilles said we could use his room, as he is staying over Robert Faulkner's house tonight," Niaran said, obviously referring to herself and her couple, Kanen'tó:kon.

You mentally cursed Captain Faulkner for inviting Achilles, and cursed Achilles for accepting his offer.

"Then Na'estse can stay with [Name]," Connor suggested.

Hell no.

"Sure!" This was turning out the wrong way.

She smiled at you, and you felt bad for feeling jealousy towards her.

She was very likeable; you understood why Connor felt so at ease in her company. "Thank you, [Name]. I did not intend to violate your privacy."

"Don't worry. I have some pajamas that you can use," You offered. She was more or less your size; she would fit in your clothes.

"Yes, please." She said. "Um, if you excuse me, I'm really tired. See you in the morning," She waved at Niaran and Kanen'tó:kon and flashed a beautiful smile Connor's way, smile that he returned immediately with equal happiness.

Never had you felt more devastated watching a couple of smiles.

The knot that had previously formed in your throat came back stronger. You were afraid to break down right there, and you refused to let that happen. Not in front of them, not in front of him.

Not again.

"Night," Was all you could manage before rushing upstairs.

Connor looked at the stairs puzzled. Just what the hell had happened?

Niaran just sighed. She could clearly see all the emotions in your eyes, unfortunately, what she could see the most was pain. Why did Ratonhnhaké:ton have to be so frigging oblivious?

You slammed the door of your room closed. Sliding down it, you sat down on the floor. "What's wrong with me?"

A soft knock took you out of your line of thoughts; you opened it and smiled weakly at Na'estse.

She returned the smile awkwardly. Those were the situations Na'estse liked to avoid, for she was not familiarized with them, still, she wanted to make an effort to see if she could make you feel better.

"Are you okay?" Her voice was soft, barely above a whisper.

Oh, how many times have you been asked that question? You just wished the answer would change. Maybe you were just not made to love, or worst, to be loved.

No.

"I am… fine,"

Na'estse nodded. If you wanted to talk, you would. She understood perfectly that you wanted time and that you were troubled, the question was… why?