"You couldn't have installed a human keyboard on this, could you?" Dib sighed in frustration, looking at the foreign symbols with a glare.
"You're the stink-meat that said you could understand the symbols; six years and you still can't understand? Pathetic," Zim retorted, rolling his eyes at the whiny human.
"Hey! I do understand a lot of it! But my ship translates the rest of it," he explained. Zim snorted; if Dib actually did understand, he'd realize that there was a button for the human keyboard in the corner.
Dib stretched, feeling cramped after sitting in Zim's living room for the past hour without moving. Zim was typing everything up for the majority of the hour but, Dib feeling useless, decided to volunteer to help. Now, the alien was caught somewhere between amused at Dib's confusion and irritated at the slow pace he was keeping.
"Pitiful human," Zim snarled, crossing his arms over his chest for moment before hitting the key in the corner. Dib jumped as soon as a holographic keyboard was projected over the irken one, human letters and symbols on the transparent keys.
Dib glared at the irken, who returned the favor, before sighing in defeat and typing out the information.
Zim resisted a smug grin at his superiority over the human; one of the few things he actually did have superiority over. His gaze wandered over the objects in his base; the TV Dib typed on, the monkey poster, artificial houseplants. He felt his eyes linger on one piece of machinery, tucked neatly under the table with other scrape metals.
It looked like a lazer… because it was a lazer! Carefully built and welded, it was a lazer worthy of the great Zim himself. This would make sense because he made it himself…
Zim saddened slightly, remembering that it was that very gun that brought him into the transmission from his Tallest that informed him of the horrible news…
"Finally!" I sighed, lifting the mask off my face and placing it onto the table. Gir froze at the word, since it was my first time talking over the past few days.
"Master is done! Now can I eat da potato!" the manic robot screeched, marching over. I held the machinery away from Gir protectively.
"This isn't a potato Gir; this is the greatest weapon I have ever developed!" I exclaimed, glaring at the idiotic robot. The blue orbs widened curiously.
"Oooh, what it do?" he asked, jumping onto the table to meet me at eye level. I only continued to glare.
"Why should I tell you?" I asked dismissively, walking away from the robot with the machine. Unfortunately, he followed me like we were connected by an invisible string.
"What it do? What it do? What it do? What it do?" he chanted the mantra over and over. I could feel the beginnings of a headache throb in my skull.
"Fine, I'll tell you," I groaned, unable to deal with the annoying robot. Suddenly, Gir sat down in front of me, eyes large and attentive, as if he was about to watch the stupid show on TV. I held the lazer above my head.
"This is a Molecular Reorganizing… Thing, uh, 3000. Also known as an MRT 3000; it reorganizes the brain patterns of any species, commanding them to obey the one who owns the gun," I explained. Gir tilted his head to the side. I sighed.
"I guess I'll just have to show you," I murmured, walking to anouther section of the labs with Gir loyally following behind. We walked into a large room, walls lined with clear pods containing earthian creatures. We strolled past a hamster, a crying little girl banging on the glass, and a giant squid until we reached my target; a hissing earth cat.
"Gir, release the vicious feline and hold it out," I ordered, aiming the lazer toward the entrance. The robot turned red, saluting, before marching to the pod, holding out a very pissed off cat. I took aim carefully at the struggling feline and fired; the cat fell from Gir's robotic little hands, flinching between spasms. Gir, now blue, starting tearing up.
"Why, my kitteh? WHY!" he bawled, watching the cat in horror. Suddenly, the cat stopped, standing up wobbly and shaking its head like it just woke up from a sleep; it's yellow eyes met my red and it purred, approaching me and rubbing against my leg. It took all my strength not to kick the thing away.
"You see, Gir? Now the cat will obey my every command! Kitty!" I announced, the orange thing looking up at me. "I command you to roll on the floor!" It started rolling around. Gir giggled furiously, smiling.
"Do me, master! I wanna roll around too!" he screeched, reaching for the weapon. I held it away from him.
"No, Gir! This lazer reorganizes molecular structures of the brain… which, unfortunately, you don't have," I stated. He looked at me blankly for a moment before giggling, rolling around with the cat on his own.
"My point exactly." I turned away from the idiotic creatures to the large transmission monitor, pressing the keys to transmit to the Tallest about my creation. The two appeared on the screen, lounging on a couch with donuts.
"My Tallest," I greeted respectfully with a bow. "I have just created this amazing weapon which-,"
"Zim, stop, we don't care about your weapons," Red interrupted. I felt a light flash of fury at the interruption but, they were the Tallest.
"Well, I swear this one doesn't vaporize the user! It actually controls the brains of stink meats to-,"
"No, seriously Zim, we really don't care," Purple interrupted. I bit the inside of my cheek, holding my tongue.
"What do you mean, my Tallest?"
"Zim, how long have you been on earth?" Red asked.
"Six years, seven months, eight days, fourteen hours, eight minutes and thirty six seconds. In irken, that translates to-,"
"No, that's not necessary, Zim. You have been there for, roughly, over half of an irken year; you still haven't taken over that planet, have you?" I felt my eyes widen.
"W-Well, if you just gave me a week, I could destroy this filthy planet for good!"
"Zim, we're tired of playing this game. Seriously, it was hilarious for the first few months but, now this is just getting annoying." I felt my forehead crease, trying to decipher the meaning.
"Truth is Zim, we hate you," Purple stated, biting his donut. Red nodded in agreement.
"We absolutely loathe you. When you came back from Foodcourtia, asking for a planet, we sent you out as far away from Irk as we possibly could, hoping you'd end up dead before you could reach anywhere; it's only your luck that that miserable planet ended up being there. So, for a while, we just made this all a game, watching you fail after miserable failure, laughing." I felt my antennae droop with each demeaning word they spoke.
"Yep, we even broadcasted all your transmissions as a joke. Everyone on Irk thought that it was hilarious how gullible you were," Purple laughed. Everyone? I thought with humiliation, resisting my lower lip trembling.
"Zim, you've been banished for a full irken year, counting the time after your abomination of operation Impending Doom I. That's why you weren't even invited to operation Impending Doom II, because you were already banished! So, now, we're just telling you not to contact us anymore because we're blocking any and all transmissions within three swinzroids from earth. Not just us, but all of Irk," Red stated viciously. I looked at him with desperate eyes; my Tallest couldn't do that.
"Also! By order of the Tallest - that's us - if you're spotted back in this section of the galaxy, whatever section this is," Purple started. "All aliens have orders to bring you in for execution." I gaped at this.
"Under what charges!" I demanded rudely; they weren't MY Tallest anymore, so I didn't need to show them the utmost respect.
"Denying banishment and annoying the Tallest," Red stated with serious eyes. I gawked once more.
"Don't forget yelling! He just did that," Purple added. I grinded my teeth together, a rage boiling inside me.
"Zim, don't contact us again. EVER," Red said with dismissal, the screen flashing to black. I stood there, my fists clenched, growling under my breath.
I felt a tugging on my sleeve.
"Master? Is master alright?" I really just wanted Gir to go away. No, I wanted to hit something, destroy something; let out all my rage on the closest thing to me.
"Gir, go away," I growled, not turning from the black screen. Gir seemed to sense my true rage because the hand left and he was asking the cat to follow him up the stairs without his usual enthusiasm. When I heard the elevator leave, everything just seemed to become a flurry of destruction. I broke whatever could be broken, my rage taken out on whatever equipment, furniture; even the monitor became cracked and damaged.
All the while, the creatures in the pods ceased their noises, watching in fear of my rage. I didn't damage any of the pods, I don't know how or why, but I knew that this bit of unleashed fury would scar them, make them fear me.
Somewhere in my rage, I blacked out. Because, the next thing I knew, Gir was lightly prodding my forehead.
"Master? Are you dead? Please don't be dead, Master. Mr. Kitty needs you," he whined. I opened my eyes but I felt dead; sentenced to live my life on this filthy ball of dirt. I didn't know how I'd survive.
"Hey, Zim? Something wrong?" Dib's voice broke Zim's thoughts. He raised a non-existent eyebrow at the human.
"Does it look like something is wrong, Dib-beast?" he spat, irritable. Dib seemed to be taken aback and he looked at the screen, typing.
"You were just quiet, is all," he murmured. Zim wanted to be near Dib, suddenly. The urge was a new but familiar one, like that first day of hi skool after he had gotten the news.
I didn't realize how miraculously blue the sky was. I couldn't compare the colour to my own planet's constant grey sky, due to the constant toll on the atmosphere from the planet's pollution; I figured earth couldn't be far but I could actually appreciate the clear skies at the moment.
This ball of dirt actually held some kind of beauty, now that I had to live on it for the remainder of my existence. Despite the stupidity of humans and the damage they have done, I could actually relate this to Irk's own demise. Irk was a complete planet city and has even been cleared out from the inside for below surface incubation and irken training areas.
But, ignorance among humans seemed to be common, which was probably why they would bring down their own planet sometime. I walked to hi skool, my eyes watching a blue bird as it landed in a tree. My mind was slowly becoming used to the idea of staying on this filthy planet. You know, until I was tackled to the ground by that familiar, big headed annoyance of my life.
"Ha! I have you now, Zim! Your alien plans won't work so long as I make sure you can't do anything about it!" Dib gloated. I growled, letting a mechanic arm out of my pak and knock him off, only so I could climb on Dib, facing him with a lazer out of my pak, not the MRT, while I pinned his arms. I glared.
"So, pathetic Dib, what were you saying?" I growled, Dib squirming. I felt attracted to the annoying human, surprisingly. I didn't realize how beautiful the human actually was, his angular, clear face, his unusual gold eyes, even his black, scythe like hair. When following the Tallest, he was an annoyance; now, I felt something rise out of me for the teen.
"Get off, Zim!" he exclaimed, freeing his arm and his fist flew toward me. I jumped off, attempting to retaliate before Dib's fist hit me in the squiddilyspooch, knocking the breath out of me and my balance. I grimaced in pain, though impressed Dib had the obsessive memory to know my weaknesses.
I kicked him in the shin, causing him to yelp in pain. I'm sure we would've battled further but, the bell rang in the distance, causing both of us to end with a glare.
Zim sighed, moving closer to Dib. The human tensed but relaxed, seeing that Zim just pointed out a spelling error. He didn't move away from the human though, as he finished typing the report out. Finally, within a half hour, the report was done.
"Finally, finished," Dib sighed, stretching out. Zim frowned.
"Do you truly believe it's finished? Nothing more can be added?" Zim questioned, scrolling through the pages. Dib looked at him with a confused expression.
"What do you mean? We've got everything down," Dib asked.
"All the information that anyone can get through the internet down; this pitiful report is just restating stuff humans have already known and placed onto the internet. If we add something personal, that could get us a higher grading from the teacher unit." A personal touch? Dib wondered. That actually could work.
"But, wouldn't that mean that one of us would have to do drugs or something? I don't think that would be-,"
"No, I just mean one of us should become addicted to a substance," Zim interjected. "Something simple, like for you, chocolate or candy or something; I honestly don't care. This is just an opinion… an AMAZING opinion, because it is ZIM'S." Dib bit his lip, looking into his crimson red eyes; his mind went blank, running on an urge.
Leaning forward, he let his lips brush against the aliens.
~!~!~!~
You guys really should hate me after that cliffhanger. ;P
Anyways, sorry 'bout not being on for a while. Lucian has been hit with some kind of inspiration because he keeps on using the computer. But, eh, whatever. Not like I care.
I think that there'll only be two chapters left! Oh my, and I was just beginning to love this story! And, no complaining about the longness of the flash back; it was necessary. Uh huh, yep. So, yeah.
MY VIDEO GAMES ARE WORKING AGAIN DAMMIT! I LOVE IT! YAYS! Now, I can battle those goddamn trains in Zelda, get frustrated, and break it again! YES!
It always happens.
Lexi! omnomnomnomwtfbqqsauce
Also! The principal is, in fact... going to be revealed after this commercial break! Nah, I kid, I hate it when they do that. Nope, the principal actually is the star of JtHM, Johnny C.