Disclaimer: I do not own.

A/N: This is the final chapter, and probably has the most romance and adventure. HOWEVER, given the circumstances, it was important to me that Honor not be pressured into doing something she didn't want to do. She is a very sexual person, but she didn't come to the Savage Land to get laid. In this story, I wanted to show that she is resourceful and courageous. You might argue that Gambit doesn't get the same treatment, and ROMY fans might be pissed… But I felt I kept him in character. (He's only human!) A quick note about Beltane: it was the pagan festival celebrating fertility and the conception of the God by the Goddess. It still exists today as "May Day", or May first. And finally, the name Caradoc comes from my favorite Arthurian knight. He's probably the only knight who married his love and stayed loyal to her. It's a fantastic love story, and a rare gem from a world where rape, terrorism and murder were common.

Savage Land

Chapter Three:

Emma Frost-Summers, the resident telepath, activated Cerebra for the fourth time in five days. Now that the investigation had a lead, her part could be more productive. As usual, her work was observed by a small, inquisitive crowd. Gambit would trust no one to relay the message correctly: not even Emma, apparently.

Earlier that night, he had called with the strangest story… Mystique was taking her grandchildren for the night when Becca told her grandmother about a dream involving Honor. Mystique was unparalleled in dream interpretation, and after a little discussion, confronted Gambit and Rogue with her deductions. The three of them pieced everything together and decided Honor had somehow landed in the Savage Land.

"The Savage Land" was an anomaly: a jungle paradise hidden within the vast wilderness of Antarctica. Although the people who lived there had no form of government, they were extremely powerful and dangerous. The X-Men had been there on occasion, and knew how perilous the place could be. The sooner they could extract Honor, the better.

"I cannot reach her mind," Emma said, removing the headpiece, "But she is there. Assemble a team and I'll ready the Blackbird."

I thought I'd have more time. Beltane, the festival of love, was still a night and two days away. The celebration lasted three nights, and during this time, all the women in the village expected to conceive. But I would be first. Unfortunately, the Hezbakis saw no need to prolong the excitement. Moving as one entity with one purpose, I was separated from Caradoc and taken to the temple. Sacred songs were sung and holy ointments smeared on my hands and feet. I was bathed in warm water and rose essence. My hair was brushed and braided. Laska sowed tiny pearls in the loose parts of my hair, and even without a mirror, I knew I was beautiful.

As the sun began its descent, candles were lit to postpone the day. Time remembered that it, too, was finite. I shook with dread; my time of comfort was dying.

The dress I was given to wear was lovely. Like most wedding dresses, this one was white and romantic. But I would never have worn this in a church. The silk was so sheer that all my shadowed regions were visible. Any movement exposed my hindquarters, and my nipples weren't really covered but rather hidden in the knitted embroidery. Despite its vulnerabilities, I found little things to love about it – the plunging neckline and the way it clung to my bust – but it was just wrapping. The dress was meant to be tantalizing and quickly discarded. The more I thought about all the horrible things that might happen after the dress came off… The more my hands trembled. What if he were not the gentleman I expected? I didn't really know him, after all… What if it was painful? What if we had an audience? Mon Dieu! Nothing could be worse! No, something could be worse than that. What if I got pregnant?

"You are beautiful, Ah-nar," Laska told me sweetly, squeezing my hands.

The others were slowly leaving, and she stood to join them.

"Wait! What's happening?"

She laughed softly. "We're going to bring your champion."

I gripped her hands and whispered desperately. "Please don't leave me!"

"It will be fine," She smiled. "He does not have to spend the night here unless you invite him."

She turned and left me wondering at the meaning of her words. Could I really send him away? Alone with my thoughts, I could hear the distant beating of celebration drums. I heard the laughter of women in flirtation, and the growl of men in lust. I knew that all around my temple were couples mingling, music playing, and slaves presenting a steady stream of heavy wine and delicious meals. Soon, garments would be discarded and pipes lit. Inside my temple was a silence so thick it rattled my bones. I sat on the steps leading to the throne – as I always did. The dirt beneath my bare feet was tightly packed, but I wondered if I could burrow myself under it.

The door opened and Caradoc emerged into the candle light. He was dressed a little provocatively, too, with a leopard skin loincloth and fresh soap on his skin.

I blushed and looked down, hating the manipulations. The villagers were doing everything within their power to make Caradoc and I want each other… Or at least think we wanted each other.

He came to me and knelt so that our eyes were level. He smelled like sin. Without a sound, he took my hands and kissed the knuckles. I wondered if this was how it would be: quiet, reserved, detached. While I did not object to his actions, I didn't encourage them, either. I wasn't enjoying this bit of flirtation, and realized I would have to work very hard to convince him I wasn't gay. His lips were like fish lips on sandpaper. When he moved to my face, I couldn't help but flinch.

"Goddess?" He pulled away. "I feel as through your heart is not in this. I apologize, but this is not how we do things."

I sobbed at his kindness. Where I expected anger and selfishness, he had showed me compassion. I had never known this quality in a lover – not even Tess.

"I'm sorry," I confessed, "But where I come from, it's disgraceful for a girl to sleep with someone she… doesn't love."

He sat back and watched me for a long time. I could not read his face. Finally, he said: "I will not disgrace you."

He moved to leave.

"Where are you going?" I nearly panicked.

"I will not be far, Ah-nar; just outside the door, in case you want for companionship."

"Couldn't you stay? Just a little longer?"

"I'm sorry, goddess, but I was sent for one reason only. If I terry, the others might suspect I have fulfilled my duty. I could not give them such bitter hope. I do not understand you, but I do trust you. When you're ready, I will be waiting."

But I had wanted to deceive him. I was worried the villagers would discover my secret. I had hoped to keep him inside (but at a distance) until I could work out the next step in my scheme, but he wouldn't oblige. The only way to keep him inside was to bed him.

The village was furious with me. Word quickly spread that Caradoc spent the night outside the temple, and it was a natural reaction to blame him. While he was too noble to correct them, I could not allow this man to suffer more for me. The royal family and townspeople concealed their pain and anger as best they could. The High Priestess showed me no such mercy.

"Why did you send him away?" She railed. "Why do you punish us needlessly? If you are foolish enough to partake of our offerings without blessing us-!"

"Have we failed you in some way?" asked Rahar.

"Do you require something we did not provide?" Oxxanya said.

"I know where we failed," Purnanada answered them, "We should have forced her to dance with the god. That would have moved her in the right direction."

I felt a chill at her threat.

For the Holy Sisters, intercourse came once a year during Beltane. Often, they were given to the chief or some other heroic man. Sometimes they could choose their partner, but only after their first child was born. The object was to protect the priestesses from "falling in love" and leaving the holy service. While most of the women went willingly to the bed of a stranger, some were reluctant. These young ladies were "persuaded" by a blessed phallic stone forced into their privates. This smooth, grey rock represented the god of love. Although this act was performed with an inanimate object in a room full of priestesses, it was still considered sacred. Once the uneasy sister experienced the ecstasy and passion, her fears were expunged. The priestesses called this experience "the dance with the god".

To save myself from this fate, I said: "Impatience is not a virtue! No one was instructed to celebrate early, and certainly no one consulted with me. I will not tolerate your insubordination!"

Twelve eyes lowered in submission.

Behind Purnanada's fierce eyes, I could see a storm brewing. I needed to deal with her before her trouble became too great. However, just as I was delving into her past, a commotion outside broke the spell within. The hunters had returned with a great bounty, and the village was glad for their return. But there was something else… The hunters brought an outsider with them…

I couldn't believe it! The hunters had intercepted my father and brought him here. What were the chances of that happening so perfectly? All this time, I thought I'd been controlling things: pulling all the strings. But here, a complete surprise happened to fulfill my desires. Maybe I was not as powerful as I thought. Stranger still, how had he gotten so close without my knowledge? I knew he was coming, and still he slipped past me! My mind was not as sharp as it needed to be.

I ran from the temple without explanation. Quickly, I passed curious bystanders and hostile hunters. I briefly saw Papa's face light up as I leapt into his arms. I felt like I was eleven-years-old again, and he was the other half of my world.

"Petite! Your Momma and I been so worried! I come t' rescue you, and here you livin' like a queen!"

I looked down at my fine clothes and beautiful coat. I still had pearls in my hair from the previous night. He was right: I was dressed like a queen.

He, on the other hand, had clearly been through a jungle hike and violent confrontation.

"Are you all right?" I asked. "They didn't hurt you, did they?"

While he pretended to be invincible, I could hear the Hezbakis informing the hunters of all the recent events. There was much apologizing and then he was swept away to be pampered. A few times, he tried to tell me about the others who'd arrived with him, but I quickly silenced him.

Papa's arrival heralded great success this Beltane. If one divinity promised blessings, how wonderful two would be! Purnanada took a particular interest in him, and personally saw to every aspect of his care. She treated him like… Well, she treated him like a god. While she bathed him in a heated tub, I used my powers to monitor their conversation.

"Is the wine to your liking, my lord?"

"Every wine would be t' my liking if it be served by such lovely femmes. What you say your name was?"

"I don't think names are important for our relationship. Actually, there aren't too many words we'll need. I only need to understand what you require of me." She untied her belt and let her dress slide from her shoulders. Wearing nothing but a proud smile, she asked: "Do you think we can manage to communicate without speaking?"

I stormed from my solitary throne into the bathing chambers. Laska was at my heels as always, and once I barged into the room, I saw the other priestesses doting on my father.

"Father! A word!"

He unnecessarily hurried to cover himself. The tub walls were high enough and the water murky enough to conceal anything unpleasant, but my papa always displayed uncharacteristic traits around his children. More than once, I'd Seen him naked or nearly nude with a woman other than his wife; only my presence would've prompted him to modesty. Once he was dressed and we were alone, he pulled me into his arms and refused to release me. It was the first time in days I felt safe.

"It just your Papa's Cajun charm, or de femmes 'round here a little lonely?" He asked into my hair.

I had to laugh. "I don't know how much time we have, so I'll make this quick. These people are called the Hezbakis, and I… Well, they think I'm heaven-sent. A deity of sorts, and that I'm here to help them break a curse that's left them all infertile. Tonight they begin a love celebration, where everybody sleeps with whoever they want. But those damn priestesses are like kids at Christmas. They just can't wait."

"Mon Dieu! I get here just in time. Pauve ti bête… What dey done t' you?"

"No, I'm all right," I said bravely, trying to ease his imagination. "I picked out the nicest guy in town as my partner. He won't even hold my hand without asking."

"He held your hand?"

"Papa!" I said with exasperation. He knew damn well I was no straight-laced virgin.

"You too important for my jokes now? Gotta say, I've never met a deity wit' a good sense of humor." He looked around and even though we were alone, he pulled me to one side before continuing. "We gotta get outta here before t'night. De Blackbird's not a day's hike away, and I t'ink we can reach de others-"

"Leave? No."

I couldn't bring myself to tell him what I needed him to do. I wasn't brave enough to say it, and he wasn't brave enough to ask. He only said: "What you mean? No?"

We looked at each other for a long time before I said in a very small voice: "These people will die out unless we help them."

"Dey ain't your responsibility."

"Friday night, after I put the kiddies to bed, I had a dream. There are souls who have attached themselves to these people, and they're waiting to be born. They choose me – me – for a reason."

"Ain't no chance in hell I'm gonna let you have a baby out here."

"Me? No…"

Timid footfalls entered the room, and Laska spoke with her eyes lowered. "Forgive me, goddess, but we await your presence. It is time for the blessings… If it pleases you."

"I'm sorry," I told her. I suddenly realized that I'd been very rude to my only friend in this jungle swamp. With a sweet smile, I brought her close and introduced her to my father. He smiled for her, too, but in a way that made her blush and my eyes burn. Papa kept an arm around me as we walked to join the villagers. I was proud to be with him, and he was obviously very happy to be with me. For a very short time, I had him all to myself.

The Hezbakis were already engaged in some of the Beltane eve traditions. Foods considered aphrodisiac and flora that enhanced fertility littered the village center. Naked slaves prepared the bonfires that would be lit after sunset, and the villagers gathered together in a giant, single circle. Purnanada went to each and every person with a blessing and a kiss.

I pointed Caradoc out to my father. He was looking very handsome today in a modest grey tunic. His hair was loose and shaggy, making him look every bit the barbarian prince. For some reason, I expected Papa to be as smitten with him as I was. Papa was not impressed. He didn't say anything… He just looked.

"He hasn't slept in two nights," I told my father quietly. "Last night was supposed to be our… wedding night, I guess. I told him it would be disgraceful for me to sleep with someone I didn't love, so he left me alone. He could've stayed in the temple so no one knew, but he said it was wrong to mislead people. He stood outside my temple all night."

I thought it was the most romantic act in the world, but my father was still not impressed. I knew a losing battle when I saw one.

Laska pulled me into the Hezbaki prayer circle. The sounds of music, rhythm, magic and sensuality filled my blood. The Otherworld came into view: that place behind the veil where dead souls rest and unborn ones wait. Few people possess the courage to acknowledge the abyss, and fewer still will peer into it. I had never seen a ghost in the sunlight or a spell cast without candle light. But the Otherworld isn't bound by disbelief and darkness, and on that day, it boldly crossed those barriers.

My mind slipped into the collective consciousness. Blood. Lust. Love. Death. Rage.

I don't know how long we were captured in the spell, but the entire plateau was included. Only Papa, with his fear and doubt, stood outside and observed. He said we were all very focused and moved as one. The energy was palpable. We fed off each other: growing and moving until the beast reached maturity.

My mind lifted above the others. Their faith and force raised my consciousness into Nirvana. My very first reaction was liberation. Freed from logic and love, I suddenly understood the universe. I saw all things as they were: connected and pure. People aren't as unique as they believe. We are all just parts of the larger existence. If I had to give my experience a physical description, I'd call it white. All things were light and inviting. Misery and suffering were so far removed from this place that they didn't even exist in memories.

From my father's view, I had stopped moving. I stood in a trance with my eyes closed and my head back. After a few moments, my body became so light that it lifted from the ground. The others were oblivious, but slowed and lowered their limbs. Papa said I'd never looked more at peace.

In Heaven (or wherever I was), a shadow approached. It was small and slow, so I mistakenly thought it harmless. In an instant, the shadow transformed into a furious, hideous demon and grabbed me. The beast had fangs as long as my hands and talons that pierced my shoulders. I screamed and fought back.

We fell through the vastness of deep space, a flurry of limbs and teeth and hair. I could feel her anger and resentment burning through my serenity.

Her.

Seraphina.

"They took everything from me!" She screamed. "I will see them suffer! I will!"

I couldn't defend what the Hezbakis had done. Even if they had acted justly, that was no comfort to her angry ghost. All I could do was offer her peace.

"They suffer without your vengeance," I told her. "They always have and always will. Why prolong your agony just to ensure their own? You hurt them in life; is there nothing better to do with your afterlife?"

She remembered things that she'd forgotten. Her husband. Her son. In her bitter grief, she'd reined sorrow over the Hezbaki plateau, but she suffered with them. It was a dance that didn't end with death, but would end with forgiveness.

"Caranev… Where is my son?"

His ghost still roamed: haunted and hungry as his mother. His infant body had been discarded without a proper funeral, which meant his soul could never rest. I knew he haunted the forest near his body, and told her so.

"Will you light his pyre?" she asked me with tears streaming down her suddenly beautiful face.

She was no longer a monster, but the enchanting young woman who seduced a king and stained his legacy. I saw her as she truly was: a clever and cunning girl looking for an equal. All she had wanted was a place to belong. That place awaited her in the Otherworld, but she had refused it. Now she could take her family home. In understanding, she became part of the light. Before she faded into the collective consciousness, I promised to burn her son.

As I slowly and calmly descended, I began to feel my body again. My shoulders were warm and wet. I felt a presence leave my body, and then the ground returned to my feet. Many hands supported me, but I didn't see anyone. Later, Papa said I was caught in a beam of light that emitted from my own body. A blinding blue glow supported me as water would. He watched me float, and then struggle through Seraphina's assault. Of course, no one else saw this because they were in the Otherworld with me.

I opened my eyes to dusk and beheld the villagers sitting with crossed legs. Looking at myself, I saw two puncture wounds where Seraphina's curse had touched me. I was the last person she would ever harm.

During what should have been a holy celebration, the Hezbakis retrieved and burned the body of Seraphina's son. I insisted on it. After his ashes were scattered, I blessed the villagers and the party resumed.

The priestesses busied themselves with entertaining my father. They kept feeding him wine, which I'm pretty sure contained a love potion. After a few cups, he stumbled into a tent with Purnanada and Rahar. Flames leapt at the night sky, licking the velvet void. The bonfires cast silhouettes through the tents, displaying love scenes like puppet shows. Then the parties would empty the room and switch partners. Even the slaves got to participate. Everyone was nude and happy; everyone was equal on Beltane. The entire village smelled like sex, and always I could hear the rhythm of drums. The pounding matched the thrusts of carnal acts, beating its message into my heartbeat. Despite myself, I began to quiver. I wanted to be loved, too.

I took Caradoc's hand, and he followed me to the temple. At the door, he hesitated.

"I do not think I should enter, Ah-nar."

"Why not?"

"I… We've had this conversation before."

I kissed him very softly. "Your goddess bids it."

I walked inside, knowing he would follow. A moment later, he obliged. I smiled to myself and poured some wine.

"Where I come from, we have customs before we do these sorts of things…" I said. "We drink, talk, maybe dance. Would you humor me?"

"We have these customs, too," he answered. "I was hoping for a chance to talk with you. We haven't really had much time together, and there's something I have wanted to ask you. I saw you in the forest that day, didn't I? You have been watching me for years. Why me, Ah-nar?"

"You are the only one I could trust," I said. I drank my wine and waited for him to follow, but he never lifted his cup.

"I have waited for you all my life," he continued with enthusiasm. "You must know how lonely I was growing up. Conceived at Beltane and born to parents who never wanted me, all I ever wanted was a woman's love. When I was a child, I saw you in a dream. You told me you would watch over me from the summer stars, and one day you'd reward me for all my misery. All these years, you have been my only hope."

My heart ached at his confession. I knew he was sincere, but I did not share his feelings.

"The day I saw you in the woods was the same day that the summer stars retired. And then for you to ask for me… I have never felt such pride."

"Drink," I urged.

He took a small swallow. "I was never in line for the chiefhood. Surely you know that. My father had many children, both by his wife and others. But after Seraphina warped his mind, I lost what little I had. Truly, I was born under the unluckiest of stars. But I would do it all again for you."

"Don't… You don't know me."

"Do you love me, Ah-nar?"

"What?"

"Do you love me?"

I downed my cup and refilled us both. "Have you ever been with a woman?"

"Yes," he said lightly. "Last Beltane. And you?"

"Yes," I echoed. We smiled at each other.

I realized now that he was intentionally not drinking his wine, so I tried a different approach. "Lie down and I'll rub your back."

"Goddess, I would not dare-"

"I command it."

He smiled playfully and lay on his stomach. I straddled his dierre and began rubbing his shoulders. Once he was relaxed, I carefully pitched a nerve here and there until he was fast asleep. More than one way to take a man out! I made imitation guns with my fingers and kissed them: good Thieving fingers. Then I stripped my own clothes off and curled up next to him.

Bright, burning, blinding sunlight poured in through the opened door. Through a splitting headache, I saw Laska's smiling face. She bid Caradoc and me good morning as we moved to cover our nakedness. Oxxanya peaked over her shoulder and then disappeared with bursting laughter.

"She's going to tell the High Priestess," Laska stated the obvious. "Caradoc, get dressed. Goddess, quickly - let me brush your hair."

She invited herself in and went to work. With a wash bowl, I cleaned the smelliest parts of my body: my armpits, feet and crotch. What I wouldn't give for a proper bath. Laska brushed and re-braided my hair while I pulled on my jacket and sandals. As she stood before me, so close I could smell her breath, I noticed a new color in her face. Her eyes were brighter than before. She had changed.

"You're no longer a virgin, are you?" I asked. My voice was low to save her any shame, but she smiled proudly.

"Safe to say, Ah-nar, there are far fewer virgins now. How was your night?"

"Successful," I said vaguely. "And yours?"

"Very successful! Physical love is wonderful. I do not know how I can live without it now! I have heard horrible stories about lovers who are selfish and rough, but he was none of those things. He was skilled and generous and very patient with me. At first, I resisted him. I wanted him, but I was so afraid. He laid me down and held me and kissed me until I wasn't frightened anymore."

"That's so sweet," I said, my face burning. I was sexually experienced, but I had never had a conversation like this before. In a strange way, I adored Laska for her sweet shamelessness. "What happened after that?"

"You'll think me strange, but I made him put out all the lights. I was afraid he wouldn't find me beautiful or that I'd do something to embarrass myself. He did things I've never imagined… Bizarre things… But it wasn't unpleasant. And then something happened… Promise you won't laugh."

She and I leaned very close together and she continued in a whisper.

"My whole body began to shake. I felt this energy flow through me, as if I had been running. And then, in my lower belly, something tightened and tightened. I wanted things I had never wanted before. I think that is called lust. I thought I was dying, but it was a wonderful way to die! And then, when the tightness in my belly released, I filled with light. My body never felt so happy."

I covered a giggle. "That's an orgasm. What was he doing?"

"I couldn't see," she said sadly. "He had my breasts in his hands. And he was doing something down below, with his mouth, I think."

We shared a laugh and she shook her head, blushing furiously. "What did Caradoc do?"

She was curious as kitten, but also worried that I would think her perverse. I decided to share a past sexual experience with her in order to alleviate her fears. I merely replaced Ethan's name with my champion's. I told her that he was well endowed and fearless in his exploration. At first, I was ashamed, but we had only ourselves to please. We tried all sorts of positions, which I described in detail, and when he came, he gave a sort of growl that was as erotic as any touch.

"Really?" Her eyes were wide. "I never thought he had it in him…"

Luckily, my champion was out of hearing range. But I'd said nothing unkind, anyway.

"I was given a place of honor," Laska said, quickly running her fingers through her own brassy hair. "As the only Holy Virgin, I was given first to the god. I may bear the first child in five years. I may be the mother of the Messiah's child!"

As her words hit me, all the blood drained out of my face, chest and arms. My legs felt heavy and my head light. She'd slept with my father and given me a graphic description of it! I wanted to shove a screwdriver through my ears. Simultaneously, my precognitive abilities pierced into her body. She was not pregnant yet, but very soon would be.

That was the reason I'd been chosen to help these people: the unborn children were my brothers and sisters!

The next few minutes passed in a daze. Purnanada pulled me from my temple and brought me to the village square. Everyone observed as she bound my wrist to Caradoc's with a red rope. There was a great celebration and lots of activity, but my mind raced on another plane. I suddenly knew things I did not want to know: Papa had impregnated the Holy Sisters. They sang his praises to whomever would listen, and now married women were seeking him out, too.

I Saw Rogue, and what she would do if she ever found out. The arguments. The accusations. They would fight so loudly that the little ones would hear, and cry themselves to sleep. She'd force my father to leave. Eventually, she'd take him back, but the trauma would be done. Ollie would never forgive my father, and Becca would carry abandonment issues for the rest of her life.

I Saw the faces of my unborn – un-conceived - siblings. Nineteen girls and twelve boys. My father had known his share of women, but good gracious! That number was a little indulgent, even for him! I could only assume that this place was indeed magical. Perhaps lifting Seraphina's curse had caused the exact opposite reaction, leaving every woman extremely fertile. After my father and I were gone, his legacy would live on. He would be held up as a deity among the Hezbakis. His children would forever change the Savage Land: children he would never know.

Back in New York, Scott had the unpleasant duty of telling Belle that the X-Men had lost communication with the recon team. Granted, he'd given worse news, but no one liked to tell Bella Donna anything she didn't want to hear.

"Whatdaya mean, 'lost communication'?" She hollered, Hero perched on her hip. The two of them gave him identical looks: chins lowered and eyes bright.

"It happens," he said calmly. "They're in a remote location with a lot of interference. There's no reason for alarm. When we hear from them again, you'll be the first to know."

"I want to see dere last transmission."

"I can't allow that, Belle."

"I didn't ask."

"They landed safely in an area known to be unpopulated. Logan said they were going to scout out the area for leads. After that, the radio failed. For all we know, they might have her and be headed back."

"Remy's a much better liar. You should take notes."

After my "wedding", Caradoc and I took a walk alone. He showed me the house where the royal bastards were raised, and the fields where he learned to fight. He had great promise of serving in his father's army until Seraphina arrived. He loved hunting, and taught me little tricks: how to track, how to run silently, and how to kill small and large beasts. Of course, with his luck, all the animals had slipped into hibernation except for a giant reptile too dangerous for us to challenge. We had to climb a tree to escape… But we took it in stride.

"The lizards are not as fierce as the boars," he told me while we waited in the tree limbs. "Wild pigs travel in packs and can wait for days. I once had the misfortune of encountering them without a weapon. For ten days, I lived in an oak tree waiting for them to abandon me. They finally starved to death. I survived on ants, acorns and honey. The bees festered into my skin, planting their eggs under my flesh. It was agonizing, but preferable to the boars."

"You're incredible," I gushed.

"Incredibly unlucky."

We climbed down and breakfasted on fish he caught with his bare hands. I helped him clean the meat – something I hadn't done since I was a child – and he taught me how to cook fish on a stick.

"It's so easy to be with you," I told him quietly. We sat side-by-side before a dying fire.

"I know what you are, Ah-nar… And I know what you are not. I could be happy with you. But I know you want things I could never give you. I will try to make you happy, if you'll have me."

I did not have the heart to tell him the truth, so I kissed him instead. His lips were cold and wet.

Yuck.

We returned to the village, and it was clear that Laska had been searching for me with desperation.

"Oh, Ah-nar!" She hugged me. "Your father sent me for you some hours ago. I have been out of my mind with worry!"

"I'm sorry, dear. I'm perfectly safe with Caradoc."

She gave him an uncertain look and pulled me away. We left him by the market and walked through the gardens. She led me past the center, and we strolled by a long line of women. From their impatient looks, I assumed we were passing the ladies room, but Laska stopped at the front of the line. Looking uncomfortable, she glanced at the tent with the wait and said, "He's in there."

These women weren't waiting on a chamber pot… They were waiting to bed my father!

"PAPA!" I screamed.

Two heartbeats later, he stumbled out with a hastily applied robe. Before the door closed after him, I saw the shapes of two naked women lying on a fur rug.

"Catin? Jesu, don't do dat!"

"You called me!"

"Five minutes," he returned to his whores.

I screamed and stomped back to my temple so furiously that my feet hurt. Caradoc was waiting for me inside, and watched me fume for several seconds before speaking.

"Goddess, at the risk of incurring your wrath, why are you angry?"

"My father has a wife!"

"Those women have husbands," he countered.

"Well, maybe those men don't care who their wives sleep with, but if Rogue ever found out-!"

"They do care. I cannot speak for all of them, but I know in general that husbands love their wives. Unfortunately, marriages aren't designed to harbor passion. They exist to produce children. As these unions have proved fruitless, they serve no purpose. Is that not why you and your father came to us?"

I was so conflicted that I expected my body would tear in two. All my frustration directed itself at Caradoc because he was the only one around.

"Is that all I am to you? Some mare to turn out for calves?"

"Am I more than some stud?" he returned coldly.

Papa coughed, making his presence known. Caradoc looked at him, back to me, and then left without another word.

"You all right, girl?" he asked kindly.

In spite of my previous anger, I was overwhelmed with joy to see him. He had a way of calming my heart that no one could ever match. Being alone with him was like being alone with myself. We sat in silence for a long time. I felt my center returning to me, and all my cares ebbed away. Finally, Papa picked up a chop stick and drew an 'X' in the ground between us.

"We can intercept them at three a.m.," I told him. "Meet me here."

I couldn't tell him everything I knew. After the Blackbird landed and the team dispersed into four different directions, Papa ran into the Hezbaki hunters and was carried to the plateau. The rest of the team – Logan, Tante Ro and Rogue – returned to the jet empty handed. When Papa never returned, they went after him and were captured by the Belzsali tribe. My would-be rescuers had some trouble, for which I was very sorry, but survived unharmed. Now they were following Papa's trail to me.

He kissed my forehead on his way out.

I sat alone in my tent and watched the light slowly fade into dusk. Another day defeated. After several precious hours in solitude, Laska came and drew a bath for me. I invited her to join me. We both relaxed in the warm, scented water. She finally pulled the pearls out of my hair, and I placed little white flowers along her crown. She looked at me with a particular glow.

"Avoid fish from the river," I told her. "It's bad for the baby. And don't let Purnanada dictate your child's life the way she has yours. This is your child, not hers."

She beamed at me. "I will raise this child in your honor."

We stayed in the bathtub until the water went cold and stale. Rahar and Oxxanya finally found us and joined our lazy conversation. The four of us returned to the temple, where we found Eait, Qioana, and Kyra. I found the mood relaxed and conversation came easily. We all listened patiently and spoke in turn. Even when Purnanada joined us, no one dominated the room. We had rejoined the collectiveness. Somehow, the conversation turned to love and sex. The priestesses refrained from mentioning my father by name, and that saved me some discomfort. I kept this to myself, but I saw that they were all pregnant by him: everyone except Purnanada, who would bear no more children. In her youth, she conceived several times and delivered most of her children. Only Caradoc was still alive. He was her unwanted son. Ironically, the child she discarded was the only one she still had.

When Laska asked me if I had ever loved, the High Priestess quietly stood and left the temple.

"I did love once," I said, and the others leaned in. "Her name's Tess. I suppose I love her still, but she doesn't care for me anymore."

"What happened?"

"We grew up. I guess she didn't like who I was."

"What about your husband?" The High Priestess asked. She had returned with her son: a most cruel act. "Do you love him?"

So Caradoc had betrayed my confidence to her, just as Laska had.

Could I trust no one?

The others watched on with placid indifference. Love was not a prerequisite to marriage for them… especially not a symbolic marriage that was terminated after Beltane. But Caradoc stood in the shadows with tears in his eyes. I had deceived him with my heart and body, and he could not understand it.

Damn that woman!

He approached me. The anger radiated from his bare chest and poured like acid from his eyes.

"Do you love me?" He asked.

I had lied so many times. What was one more? But this deception, I could not sell. I would die proclaiming my love for Tess. My throat locked up, but my eyes spoke clearly.

"You took everything from me," he said, his voice barely a whisper. It was sharp as a blade, and drove fear deep into my heart. "You made me love you. You made me suffer. For all that, do I have your love?"

"I love Tess," I said weakly.

I was so frightened of him. Would he hit me? Torture me? Rape me? He certainly wanted to do all those things… Anything to break my spirit as his was. His self-control was held by a fraying thread.

"She must've been born under a very lucky star," he told me. Then he left, burning with shame. I had made him a liar, exploited his kindness, and then made it known. I truly had taken everything from him. I didn't deserve him.

I turned away from the others, screaming for them to leave. I couldn't hold my tears back any longer.

There was a feast that night, and Papa and I were the honored guests. I did not feel much like partying, but I put on a happy face for the Hezbakis. These people had allowed us into their homes: they took us into their lives and made us a part of their culture. We had known each other a very short time, but would forever linger in each other's thoughts. I memorized their faces, and the smell of their village. Silently, I took the time to love and cherish them all. I wanted to give them the world. Sadly, I could not even bid them farewell. When they awoke in the morning and crawled from their musky tents, Papa and I would be long gone.

I apologized to Laska (again), and told her how kind and special she was. I told her that she alone was worthy to mother this miracle child, and that I would always watch out for her. There were no words to express my love and gratitude for her.

"All is well," she told me, "I love you, too, Ah-nar."

I went to bed alone. During the celebration, I'd kept an eye open for Caradoc. He was nowhere. None of the priestesses had seen him, either. I couldn't sleep, and didn't think I could leave without making peace with my champion. Perhaps after all we'd done to each other, it was better to end things without words. After the drums died and the lovers retired, he came to me. It was the dead of night, and I felt as if we were truly alone on the plateau.

"Caradoc… I'm sorry."

"I am sorry, too, Ah-nar."

We met half way in an embrace. I took him to bed with me, but nothing happened. He didn't pressure me for anything; we didn't speak further. We just held each other until sleep took over. In a dream, I heard my little brother and sisters laughing. The four of us ran wild in the backyard as a high sun looked on.

"Come on, Sissy!" Ollie taunted in his little voice, high-pitched with suppressed laughter. "Come catch me!"

I ran after of him and the three of them headed in different directions. Ollie laughed so hard that his body rocked and his legs slowed. Just as my hands closed around his ribs, he disappeared into a blue light. Suddenly, the sky turned dark, and I was surrounded by giggling blue lights. The unborn ones danced around me for a moment before floating away. I felt a peace at their parting, but one lingered behind.

"Go on," I urged it.

The light held fast, and then bonded itself to me.

I awoke ecstatic. Joy overflowed from my heart and eyes, knowing I would one day be a mother. I had been chosen. Despite Dr. McCoy's diagnosis against me ever conceiving, I knew this child would find a way to me. Caradoc slept soundly beside me, but I could wake him and give him something to remember me by… I could leave with his child. In the darkness, fresh from my vision – I didn't care that I was a sixteen-year-old, unmarried young woman with an incomplete education. I wanted a baby.

My baby.

"Chere!" A voice cut through the darkest hour. "Let's go!"

I kissed my champion farewell and fled with my father.

In the hours just before dawn, Papa and I crept out the village, down the cliffs and through the surrounding swamps. We were making our way through a valley heavy with thrones when we saw the distant shadows of our family. Rogue ran ahead of the others and hugged me first. She asked if I was hurt, and then hugged Papa. The two of them shared an affectionate reunion, and I briefly entertained the idea of telling her exactly what he'd been doing in her absence. Tante Ro hugged me next: her arms as strong and tender as a mother's.

"Wherever have you been, child?" she asked.

Logan joined us, and everyone waited on my answer.

I couldn't see my father's face in the dark, but I could see the twins.

"Funny, that…" I said. "I don't remember a thing. Papa, can you remember how we got here?"

"No idea!"

"Let us get back to the plane," Tante Ro said, putting an arm around me, "Your mother has lost much sleep over you."

"Wait," Logan growled, sniffing the air. "We're bein' tracked."

Peering into the endless shadows of the valley, I eventually saw Caradoc's form. I couldn't help but sigh.

"It's fine," I said. "Could you give us a minute? I won't be long."

The others reluctantly peeled away, glancing back constantly.

"Go home!" I told my champion.

"Ah-nar," he panted. "After all we have been through… You would leave without bidding me farewell?"

"I'm sorry. What else can I say about our relationship? I'm sorry."

He took my hands. "Wherever you are is where I want to be. Please, take me with you."

"I'm sorry," I shook my head. "I know what you are, too. And I know what you are not. The things you want from life, you can't have in my world. Believe it or not, you don't have to wait for the stars to shower you with fortune. There is a woman worthy of you on the plateau. She will come to you very soon."

He stood still and quiet for a long time. I felt the sun warming the earth, and was aware of my family waiting on me. I was also aware of his doubt and longing. He thought I was lying to him.

"I will tell you a secret," I whispered, "Laska will bear the first child since the curse. She will not give her child to foster, and will be forced from the Sisterhood. She will turn your misfortune to glory, and re-establish your father's dynasty. Take care of her, won't you?"

He sweetly kissed my brow, nose and chin.

"Remember me, won't you?"

"Of course. I love you, Caradoc."

I turned and ran to my family, thrones cutting at my precious jacket. Together we boarded the Blackbird and left the Savage Land. Strangely, I never felt removed. I was very much aware that I had taken a part of the Savage Land with me, and left something of myself behind.